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collision: lolzandtrollz: Mid Air Collision
 collision: lolzandtrollz:

Mid Air Collision

lolzandtrollz: Mid Air Collision

collision: Billy, Just Billy @BillyArmagh A Sassy Gay Republican DRAMA in Four Acts. Sassy Gay Republican @sassygayrepub As a young adult in perfect health, why should I be FORCED to pay for insurance l don't want and likely won't need? 06/03/2017, 22:37 7 Retweets 8 Likes Sassy Gay Republican @sassygayrepub Yo Bernie, you're a self-proclaimed "expert" on healthcare. Tell me...how many are dying in these massive wait lists for "free healthcare?" 2017-08-12, 2:30 PM 59 Retweets 146 Likes Sassy Gay Republican 2017-08-12 v Replying to @sassygayrepub I know when Krispy Kreme gives "free" donuts there's an hour long wait line so I was wondering how many come & wait for "free" healthcare? Sassy Gay Republican @sassyg.. .6d v Just letting you guys know I'm in recovery. If you have the time, please read. If you can, please help out & share. dl Serious Car Accident As many of you know, I was involved... gofundme.com Sassy Gay Republican @sassy....21h Guys pls pray for me during this rough time. Really didn't plan on insurance bailing on me. I'Il see what God wants me to do. 55 t34270 Sassy Gay Republican @sassy.. 21h v Insurance: Don't worry, we've got you covered!:) Me: *files claim* Thank you!! Insurance: LMAO! Ur on ur own & we raising ur rates. Sassy Gay Republican @sassy... 21h What do you recommend I do from here on out? Talk to Ins? Hire a Lawyer? File for Bankruptcy. My insurance doesn't wanna cover collision. tethmos: gwens-deaf-auntie: God sometimes karma comes through clutch
 collision: Billy, Just Billy
 @BillyArmagh
 A Sassy Gay Republican DRAMA in
 Four Acts.

 Sassy Gay Republican
 @sassygayrepub
 As a young adult in perfect
 health, why should I be
 FORCED to pay for insurance l
 don't want and likely won't
 need?
 06/03/2017, 22:37
 7 Retweets 8 Likes

 Sassy Gay Republican
 @sassygayrepub
 Yo Bernie, you're a self-proclaimed
 "expert" on healthcare. Tell me...how
 many are dying in these massive wait
 lists for "free healthcare?"
 2017-08-12, 2:30 PM
 59 Retweets 146 Likes
 Sassy Gay Republican 2017-08-12 v
 Replying to @sassygayrepub
 I know when Krispy Kreme gives "free"
 donuts there's an hour long wait line so
 I was wondering how many come & wait
 for "free" healthcare?

 Sassy Gay Republican @sassyg.. .6d v
 Just letting you guys know I'm in
 recovery. If you have the time, please
 read. If you can, please help out &
 share.
 dl
 Serious Car Accident
 As many of you know, I was involved...
 gofundme.com

 Sassy Gay Republican @sassy....21h
 Guys pls pray for me during this rough
 time. Really didn't plan on insurance
 bailing on me. I'Il see what God wants
 me to do.
 55 t34270
 Sassy Gay Republican @sassy.. 21h v
 Insurance: Don't worry, we've got you
 covered!:)
 Me: *files claim* Thank you!!
 Insurance: LMAO! Ur on ur own & we
 raising ur rates.
 Sassy Gay Republican @sassy... 21h
 What do you recommend I do from here
 on out? Talk to Ins? Hire a Lawyer? File
 for Bankruptcy. My insurance doesn't
 wanna cover collision.
tethmos:
gwens-deaf-auntie:



God sometimes karma comes through clutch

tethmos: gwens-deaf-auntie: God sometimes karma comes through clutch

collision: bunjywunjy: urban-cryptid: garbage-senpai: adinaascending: Well this is awkward  drift compatible Game glitch collision detection: OFF
 collision: bunjywunjy:
urban-cryptid:

garbage-senpai:

adinaascending:
Well this is awkward 

drift compatible


Game glitch


collision detection: OFF

bunjywunjy: urban-cryptid: garbage-senpai: adinaascending: Well this is awkward  drift compatible Game glitch collision detection:...

collision: Mon @monschleichs Whenever people tailgate me when I'm going 40 in a 35 l always purposely slow down because it's like l gave you an extra 5 and you didn't appreciate it so now you get nothing tempestaurora: returnsandreturns: slowdissolve: firebirdeternal: thelightofthingshopedfor: whitepeopletwitter: She has a point There are two situations in which I make extremely sure I’m going precisely at or below the speed limit: I see a cop Some asshole is tailgating me This is both spiteful AND practical, because you can’t control whether or not they give you a safe following distance for the speed you’re travelling, but you CAN reduce the speed you both have to travel, having the triple benefit of A) increasing the likelihood that they’ll have enough time to stop without rear-ending you. B) lowering the speed of any possible collision and thus the severity and C) Pissing the fucker the fuck off. I feel so valid now i live in the south and i also do that anytime there’s a truck with confederate flags behind me  gotta do ten under the speed limit because safety my driving instructor told me that you should absolutely be doing this if some asshole is in your boot, though. because a) they shouldn’t be leaving such a small space between you guys anyway, and they need to learn better, b) you should not be going faster than you’re comfortable or faster than the speed limit because someone else is pressuring you, and c) if you get rear-ended, it’s always the person behind’s fault! if they crash into you, you will not be blamed! and its them who has to pay out
 collision: Mon
 @monschleichs
 Whenever people tailgate me when
 I'm going 40 in a 35 l always
 purposely slow down because it's like l
 gave you an extra 5 and you didn't
 appreciate it so now you get nothing
tempestaurora:

returnsandreturns:

slowdissolve:

firebirdeternal:

thelightofthingshopedfor:

whitepeopletwitter:
She has a point

There are two situations in which I make extremely sure I’m going precisely at or below the speed limit:
I see a cop
Some asshole is tailgating me

This is both spiteful AND practical, because you can’t control whether or not they give you a safe following distance for the speed you’re travelling, but you CAN reduce the speed you both have to travel, having the triple benefit of A) increasing the likelihood that they’ll have enough time to stop without rear-ending you. B) lowering the speed of any possible collision and thus the severity and C) Pissing the fucker the fuck off.


I feel so valid now

i live in the south and i also do that anytime there’s a truck with confederate flags behind me 
gotta do ten under the speed limit
because safety

my driving instructor told me that you should absolutely be doing this if some asshole is in your boot, though. because a) they shouldn’t be leaving such a small space between you guys anyway, and they need to learn better, b) you should not be going faster than you’re comfortable or faster than the speed limit because someone else is pressuring you, and c) if you get rear-ended, it’s always the person behind’s fault! if they crash into you, you will not be blamed! and its them who has to pay out

tempestaurora: returnsandreturns: slowdissolve: firebirdeternal: thelightofthingshopedfor: whitepeopletwitter: She has a point Ther...

collision: legionofpotatoes: and here we see a bethesda employee, seated at a standard bugged collision  desk, enjoying another productive day of porting skyrim around
 collision: legionofpotatoes:
and here we see a bethesda employee, seated at a standard bugged collision  desk, enjoying another productive day of porting skyrim around

legionofpotatoes: and here we see a bethesda employee, seated at a standard bugged collision  desk, enjoying another productive day of po...

collision: New York Man Arrested for Cutting Wires to Red Light Cameras After Exposing Government Revenue Generating Scheme BEN KELLER vanilla-birdbrain: abyssalthaumaturge: critical-perspective: cointelpro-plant: Man found the stoplight cameras were activated during yellow lights and decided to cut the wires of it. Florida Man: Chaotic evil.New York Man: Chaotic good. Holy shit. Nah dude look up the entire story, it’s INSANE. The dude got arrested once before this for using a painter’s extension rod to point the stoplight cameras into the sky instead of cutting the wires. He didn’t cut the wires until AFTER he got out after being arrested the first time–which he did after posting facebook videos that prove that the stoplights are intentionally rigged to trick drivers into citations–the yellow lights at intersections with cameras only last THREE SECONDS, as opposed to the five seconds they last at other stoplights without cameras in the same county. When he cut the camera cords, he reported his deeds to the news -himself,- and then politicians pressured the local police force into arresting him. The local police and sheriff deputies actually SUPPORT him for his actions because the lights have been killing innocent people! During his most recent arrest, one of the Sheriff’s Deputies actually -offered to bail him out-.When he got home again after these incidents, there was a surveillance camera planted at his house BY THE GOVERNMENT to watch him! His reaction to being surveilled? He painted over the camera in America’s flat out fucking ballsiest “fuck you” to the gubmint I’ve ever heard of.And it gets EVEN CRAZIER. After painting over the camera, suddenly this guy–his name is Stephen Ruth by the way–started GETTING ATTEMPTS ON HIS LIFE. He reports that a car intentionally tried to hit him in a head-on collision, and after talking about the car to his neighbors, they confirmed that the car in question (Or at least, one that was visibly identical, its occupants included) had been staking out his house! Somebody was legitimately trying to MURDER HIM over his discovery and his actions! As a final insult to injury, Ruth pointed out that the VAST majority of the cameras were found SPECIFICALLY in lower-to-middle-class neighborhoods. As well, the victims of these rigged stoplights tried to go to the local news station to talk about the deaths of their family members that occurred from the rigging. Aaaand… The local station, “News12″, never aired their interviews.Remember how I said that, after cutting the cables and calling the local news station, Ruth was arrested because of pressure from politicians? Get this: News12 is actually owned by CableVision, who PROVIDES INTERNET SERVICE TO THE CAMERAS. Whereas mister Ruth was only trying to help people and save lives, he’s been caught up in a full-blown fucking government conspiracy that’s out for his blood. This guy isn’t Robin Hood, he makes Robin Hood look like a -CHUMP-. HOLY SHIT I HAVE A NEW FUCKING ROLE MODEL
 collision: New York Man Arrested
 for Cutting Wires to Red
 Light Cameras After
 Exposing Government
 Revenue Generating
 Scheme
 BEN KELLER
vanilla-birdbrain:

abyssalthaumaturge:

critical-perspective:

cointelpro-plant:
Man found the stoplight cameras were activated during yellow lights and decided to cut the wires of it.
Florida Man: Chaotic evil.New York Man: Chaotic good.

Holy shit. Nah dude look up the entire story, it’s INSANE.
The dude got arrested once before this for using a painter’s extension rod to point the stoplight cameras into the sky instead of cutting the wires. He didn’t cut the wires until AFTER he got out after being arrested the first time–which he did after posting facebook videos that prove that the stoplights are intentionally rigged to trick drivers into citations–the yellow lights at intersections with cameras only last THREE SECONDS, as opposed to the five seconds they last at other stoplights without cameras in the same county.
When he cut the camera cords, he reported his deeds to the news -himself,- and then politicians pressured the local police force into arresting him. The local police and sheriff deputies actually SUPPORT him for his actions because the lights have been killing innocent people! During his most recent arrest, one of the Sheriff’s Deputies actually -offered to bail him out-.When he got home again after these incidents, there was a surveillance camera planted at his house BY THE GOVERNMENT to watch him! His reaction to being surveilled? He painted over the camera in America’s flat out fucking ballsiest “fuck you” to the gubmint I’ve ever heard of.And it gets EVEN CRAZIER. After painting over the camera, suddenly this guy–his name is Stephen Ruth by the way–started GETTING ATTEMPTS ON HIS LIFE. He reports that a car intentionally tried to hit him in a head-on collision, and after talking about the car to his neighbors, they confirmed that the car in question (Or at least, one that was visibly identical, its occupants included) had been staking out his house! Somebody was legitimately trying to MURDER HIM over his discovery and his actions!
As a final insult to injury, Ruth pointed out that the VAST majority of the cameras were found SPECIFICALLY in lower-to-middle-class neighborhoods. As well, the victims of these rigged stoplights tried to go to the local news station to talk about the deaths of their family members that occurred from the rigging. Aaaand… The local station, “News12″, never aired their interviews.Remember how I said that, after cutting the cables and calling the local news station, Ruth was arrested because of pressure from politicians? Get this: News12 is actually owned by CableVision, who PROVIDES INTERNET SERVICE TO THE CAMERAS. Whereas mister Ruth was only trying to help people and save lives, he’s been caught up in a full-blown fucking government conspiracy that’s out for his blood. This guy isn’t Robin Hood, he makes Robin Hood look like a -CHUMP-.


HOLY SHIT I HAVE A NEW FUCKING ROLE MODEL

vanilla-birdbrain: abyssalthaumaturge: critical-perspective: cointelpro-plant: Man found the stoplight cameras were activated during y...

collision: asteroids [CAUsers Danny DesktoptHMAdvoOP Eile Edit Yiew Navigate Code Analyze Refactor Build Run Iools VCS Window Help asteroids] - srcmainljavalaooplasteroidsmodel Game.java [asteroids]- Intellil IDEA asteroids-src main ﹄java aoop asteroids b model e Game 𠱂 Game.java Bullet.java 3 GameObject.javax LargeAsteroid.java x MediumAsteroid java SmallAsteroid javaSpaceshipjava Spectatorjava c Asteroids java Asteroid java else this.asteroids.add (new SmallAsteroid (1oc Gane. nextDouble 190 H 191 192 193 194 195 1 Checks all objects for collisions and marks then as destr collision. All objects can collide vith objeots of e dirEe but not vith objects of the same type. bullets eannot 19 K bullets etc 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 213 213 5 214 2 215 private void checkCollisions) Destzoy all objects that for (Bullet b this.bullets) For all bulless for (Asteroid a: this.asteroids)W Check all buliet if (a.collides (b)) t1 Collisiondesttoy both b.destroy ): a.destroyO: if (b.collides (this.ship)) Collision with b.destroy) this.ship.destroy) for (Asteroid a this.asteroids) I Eo ali asteroids, if (a.collides (this.ship)) V colLisión with piayez a.destroyt) this.ship.destroy ) 217 218 1 219 220 221 GamecheckCollisions0 ,-TODO ·Statistic Terminal Filesystem Case-Sensitivity Mismatch: The project seems to be located on a case-sensitive file Event Log This does not match development 0勹橱 16:51 23.10.2018 2 恒} raqi) ENG ^ Wheres your god now?
 collision: asteroids [CAUsers Danny DesktoptHMAdvoOP
 Eile Edit Yiew Navigate Code Analyze Refactor Build Run Iools VCS Window Help
 asteroids] - srcmainljavalaooplasteroidsmodel Game.java [asteroids]- Intellil IDEA
 asteroids-src main ﹄java aoop asteroids b model e Game
 𠱂
 Game.java Bullet.java
 3 GameObject.javax LargeAsteroid.java x MediumAsteroid java
 SmallAsteroid javaSpaceshipjava Spectatorjava
 c Asteroids java
 Asteroid java
 else this.asteroids.add (new SmallAsteroid (1oc
 Gane.
 nextDouble
 190
 H 191
 192
 193
 194
 195
 1 Checks all objects for collisions and marks then as destr
 collision. All objects can collide vith objeots of e dirEe
 but not vith objects of the same type. bullets eannot
 19
 K bullets etc
 197
 198
 199
 200
 201
 202
 203
 204
 205
 206
 207
 208
 209
 210
 211
 213
 213
 5 214
 2 215
 private void checkCollisions)
 Destzoy all objects that
 for (Bullet b this.bullets)
 For all bulless
 for (Asteroid a: this.asteroids)W Check all buliet
 if (a.collides (b)) t1 Collisiondesttoy both
 b.destroy ):
 a.destroyO:
 if (b.collides (this.ship)) Collision with
 b.destroy)
 this.ship.destroy)
 for (Asteroid a this.asteroids) I Eo ali asteroids,
 if (a.collides (this.ship)) V colLisión with piayez
 a.destroyt)
 this.ship.destroy )
 217
 218
 1 219
 220
 221
 GamecheckCollisions0
 ,-TODO ·Statistic Terminal
 Filesystem Case-Sensitivity Mismatch: The project seems to be located on a case-sensitive file
 Event Log
 This does not match
 development
 0勹橱
 16:51
 23.10.2018 2
 恒} raqi) ENG
 ^
Wheres your god now?

Wheres your god now?

collision: Crayola e With Preferred by Teachers ar E CRAYONS 24 homestuckpatternreference: iamthesylveon: f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s: gryphynshadow: silencingthedrums: zeaky: sliceofbri: DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS  AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL. SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE. I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT DO THIS. NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK. There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them. The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi) You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted. Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint. Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color. BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible. Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.) so what you’re saying is i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns and have grey body paint i think i know where that’s going i think we all know where that’s going
 collision: Crayola
 e With
 Preferred by Teachers
 ar E
 CRAYONS
 24
homestuckpatternreference:

iamthesylveon:

f-e-f-e-t-a-c-a-k-e-s:

gryphynshadow:

silencingthedrums:

zeaky:

sliceofbri:

DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET

SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS

GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS 

AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE.

I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO

WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU
I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS

DO NOT DO THIS.
DO NOT DO THIS.
DO NOT DO THIS.
NO DO NOT FUCKING DO THIS, CRYON HAS A LOT OF FUCKING LEAD IN IT (four times more than lipstick) PLEASE JUST BUY ACTUAL LIPSTICK.

There’s no lead in crayola crayons. Kids eat them.

The ingredients in Crayola Crayons are: paraffin, wax, and pigment. They’re made with the understanding that some kids will eat the damn things, so the company that makes Crayons has been very very careful to use non-toxic materials, even going so far as to use a special edible glue on the paper labels. (cornstarch and water, fyi)
You can eat Crayons, if you really wanted to, but frankly the flavor’s a little bland. They taste like wax. So, yeah. adding oils with a lower solidification temperature like Olive Oil or Grapeseed or Avocado, and mixing in some Shea or Coconut Butter would make a creamy crayon. Which you could use on your skin, if you wanted.
Go wild, use that shit on more than just lips. Use it like theatrical makeup, paint your tits blue if you want. Or use it like paint on the walls, or paper, or canvas. It won’t dry the same way acrylic or watercolor paint will, and will remain ‘workable’ and pliable until the oil looses enough water to solidify, much like, oh, off the top of my head… oil paint.
Modern oil paints are very similar to the recipe above, though usually done with Linseed oil or other inert non-organic oils. Organic oils, as they dry, can discolor, making your carefully chosen color look off. Why are some really old painting slightly yellow? Partly the varnish has yellowed, partly airborne pollutants have stained the surface, and partly the oil in the original paint has shifted color.
BTW, don’t eat Linseed oil, you’ll get the runs something fierce and regret it a lot. And then you get to go to the doctor and explain why your runny poo is brightly colored. But the amount you’d ingest from lipstick made with crayons? Negligible.
Now I really want to make a set of rainbow lipstick to match my rainbow collection of nail polish (which is way more toxic than crayon lipstick, too.)

so what you’re saying is
i could buy a fuckton of grey crayns
and have grey body paint

i think i know where that’s going

i think we all know where that’s going

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