🔥 | Latest

Creepy, Drinking, and Facts: R 43% 20:41 Sean 4 days ago HOW YOU DOIBIPHY Hey Sean! X 3 days ago Hey yourself You know it was only last week said to my pal;'if a girl opened with a Friends quote I'd probably just marry her Oh shit, I better buy a dress! ORMAGIE COM GIPHY Should probably go out once or twice first. Just to keep everyone's parents happy Meh, fuck em Alright I like your attitude Good job really if we're getting married Tell me things What things would you like? I have much wisdom Top 5 facts about Sean Fact 1.I'm up at 5am so I must be rude and ask to continue this in the morrow if that's ok Request granted. But i want a further 5 facts 2 days ago Alright you ready? Born ready 11 have been in a coma for 2 days 2. I once played an astronaut in a Universal Studios show 3. I'll make you hate me via puns 4.I coach football. 5. I can make you laugh out loud wherever you are with one simple joke You go Excellent facts! Can you prove number 5 please? Oh shit I meant I have experienced a 2 day coma. Not the last 2 days Yes can. Why do flamingoes only lift one leg up when they stand? 1. I've never broken a bone 2. Even though I'm a strong independent woman. spiders and creepy crawlies in my house freak me tf out 3. Got 4 sisters and an army of nieces and nephews 4. My wit makes people either hate me or fall madly in love with me 5. I'm an excellent drinking buddy Go on.... Yes i gathered thats what you meant about the coma hahah If they lifted both up they'd fall Over Ok that was pretty funny Considering proved my number 5,l'd like you to do the same Deal. Name the place and time Yesterday He got me there!
Creepy, Drinking, and Facts: R 43% 20:41
 Sean
 4 days ago
 HOW YOU DOIBIPHY
 Hey Sean! X
 3 days ago
 Hey yourself
 You know it was only last week
 said to my pal;'if a girl opened
 with a Friends quote I'd probably
 just marry her
 Oh shit, I better buy a dress!
 ORMAGIE COM
 GIPHY
 Should probably go out once or
 twice first. Just to keep
 everyone's parents happy
 Meh, fuck em
 Alright I like your attitude
 Good job really if we're getting
 married
 Tell me things
 What things would you like? I
 have much wisdom
 Top 5 facts about Sean
 Fact 1.I'm up at 5am so I must
 be rude and ask to continue this
 in the morrow if that's ok
 Request granted. But i want a
 further 5 facts
 2 days ago
 Alright you ready?
 Born ready
 11 have been in a coma for 2
 days
 2. I once played an astronaut in a
 Universal Studios show
 3. I'll make you hate me via puns
 4.I coach football.
 5. I can make you laugh out loud
 wherever you are with one simple
 joke
 You go
 Excellent facts! Can you prove
 number 5 please?
 Oh shit I meant I have
 experienced a 2 day coma. Not
 the last 2 days
 Yes can. Why do flamingoes
 only lift one leg up when they
 stand?
 1. I've never broken a bone
 2. Even though I'm a strong
 independent woman. spiders
 and creepy crawlies in my house
 freak me tf out
 3. Got 4 sisters and an army of
 nieces and nephews
 4. My wit makes people either
 hate me or fall madly in love with
 me
 5. I'm an excellent drinking buddy
 Go on....
 Yes i gathered thats what you
 meant about the coma hahah
 If they lifted both up they'd fall
 Over
 Ok that was pretty funny
 Considering proved my number
 5,l'd like you to do the same
 Deal. Name the place and time
 Yesterday
He got me there!

He got me there!

College, Creepy, and Dude: If you don't teach your child to obey Jesus, the devil will teach them evolution, sexuality psychology, witchcraft thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisandry: Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time. #TeamSatan Can satan come teach a class at my school Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers. For example, this guy? Teaches moral philosophy. And this creepy dude? He’s your astronomy professor. Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild. I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school. “Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.” “Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.” “Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.” What do you have to do to get a scholarship? I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. this whole post I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL
College, Creepy, and Dude: If you don't teach your
 child to obey Jesus, the
 devil will teach them
 evolution, sexuality
 psychology, witchcraft
thefingerfuckingfemalefury:
fire-ghoul:

seekerofshores:

grumpyrpgreviews:

prokopetz:

cheesedeity:

prokopetz:

bear-eggs:

geekandmisandry:

Wow, I had no idea Satan was so knowledgeable and generous with his time.
#TeamSatan

Can satan come teach a class at my school

Amusingly, among the Western European demon-conjuring cults of the 16th Century, many demons were greatly valued for their skill as teachers, often to the point that grimoires would place greater emphasis on the subjects each demon was qualified to teach than on their supernatural powers.
For example, this guy?
Teaches moral philosophy.
And this creepy dude?
He’s your astronomy professor.
Seriously, look this stuff up some time - it’s wild.

I now want a comic or cartoon series about demon teachers and their human students. Not sure if it should be college or high school.

“Aw, man - I got Professor Lionwheel. I hear if you fail his exams, he eats your legs.”
“Yeah, but he’s supposed to be really good about keeping regular office hours.”
“Huh. Sort of a trade-off, really.”

What do you have to do to get a scholarship?

I can’t believe you called Buer, Great President of Hell, Professor Lionwheel lmfao. 

this whole post

I’M LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY AT DEMON SCHOOL

thefingerfuckingfemalefury: fire-ghoul: seekerofshores: grumpyrpgreviews: prokopetz: cheesedeity: prokopetz: bear-eggs: geekandmisand...

Butt, Chill, and Choose One: Ride Menu Choose one or more types of rides you would like today (You must be 18 years of age or older and over 4'2" tall.) The Stand-Up Ride lohn: The Lyft Driver I tell you about things I learned in prison and poor life choices I have made. Don't put a tattoo of your girlfriend on your butt. It rarely works out well. The Creepy Ride I don't say anything. I just leer at you periodically in the review mirror and lick my lips in an unpleasant, malicious or lascivious manner. The Therapy Ride Tell me about all your problems and I will pretend to care The Sympathy Ride I tell you about my problems and you pretend to care The Silent Ride The Sado-Masochistic Ride l insult you and your relatives (particularly your mother) and be as rude as I possibly can to you the whole trip. WARNING: This ride hegins by me throwing yo out of the car and making you run to catch up. The Chill Out Ride out on beautifu, qwiet classical music and you arrive at your destunation relaxed, refreshed and less likely to complain about the TSA strip search. The Gluttony Ride I recommend the best restaurants in town and warn you to stay away from the other oves ayped ones. (I will join you upon request.) The Jeopardy Ride I tell you fun facts and trivia about Nashville which will help you win game shows and amaze your friends. Hint: Ask me about "hookers Interesting Lyft ride The sadomasochistic ride is tempting (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting)
Butt, Chill, and Choose One: Ride Menu
 Choose one or more types of rides you would like today
 (You must be 18 years of age or older and over 4'2" tall.)
 The Stand-Up Ride
 lohn: The Lyft Driver
 I tell you about things I learned in prison and poor life choices I have made.
 Don't put a tattoo of your girlfriend on your butt. It rarely works out well.
 The Creepy Ride
 I don't say anything. I just leer at you periodically in the review mirror and
 lick my lips in an unpleasant, malicious or lascivious manner.
 The Therapy Ride
 Tell me about all your problems and I will pretend to care
 The Sympathy Ride
 I tell you about my problems and you pretend to care
 The Silent Ride
 The Sado-Masochistic Ride
 l insult you and your relatives (particularly your mother) and be as rude as I
 possibly can to you the whole trip. WARNING: This ride hegins by me
 throwing yo out of the car and making you run to catch up.
 The Chill Out Ride
 out on beautifu, qwiet classical music and you arrive at your destunation
 relaxed, refreshed and less likely to complain about the TSA strip search.
 The Gluttony Ride
 I recommend the best restaurants in town and warn you to stay away from
 the other oves ayped ones. (I will join you upon request.)
 The Jeopardy Ride
 I tell you fun facts and trivia about Nashville which will help you win game
 shows and amaze your friends. Hint: Ask me about "hookers
 Interesting Lyft ride
The sadomasochistic ride is tempting (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting)

The sadomasochistic ride is tempting (xpost from r/mildlyinteresting)