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    following: Grandparents will have at least one of the following
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Grandparents will have at least one of the following
                
            

            
            
Grandparents will have at least one of the following

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)


“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. 
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”

She protects her family.

Hi everybody! Guess what’s being posted on AO3 now at the following link!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/22498384/chapters/53760817
That’s right! Here you go. I’ll be uploading it in some chunks, because I want to make sure I have everything I wanted edited cleanly finished, but follow the story there!




HEY GUYS GUESS WHATS BACK ON THE DASHBOARD AND BETTER THAN EVER

                
            

            
            
cereusblue:
unnameablethings:


dragonsateyourtoast:

redporkpadthai:

dragonsateyourtoast:

otherwindow:

otherwindow:
This is how the g...

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: libertybill:
jooshcraft:


theyoungpatriot1776:


friendlyalien:


klubbhead:

friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt:


thestarsareundecided:

landysbear:


kompanie-mutter:


the-mighty-birdy:

friendly-neighborhood-patriarch:

libertybill:


libertybill:

libertybill:
Uh hey, CNN, why?
HEY UH NYT?? WHY??


HEY UH WASHINGTON POST UH??? WHY???


Eeeyup

In a world of these chucklefucks, ironically
be Buzzfeed

holy shit


WHAT THE FUCK CNN


Isn’t she the Minister of Propaganda or something? 



propaganda guru, communications aide, administrative gatekeeper
yes. 
our friends over at nbc also used some creepily similar phrasing to the other major news sources above btw, including comparing her to ivanka trump, although the headline for their piece is more neutral & less glowing. theyre still treating her like some kind of celebrity, & comparing her favorably to various member of the trump administration/family.
i cant believe buzzfeed had to be a voice of reason in the press here.
buzzfeed.
that is horrifying.


We’ve jumped timelines 
AGAIN



The terrifying timeline where I have to agree with goddamn Buzzfeed.



This feels vaguely like those occasions where an Onion article hits too close to the truth.



Vaguely Attractive Communist Woman Lauded by Media Following Gulag PR Campaign. 



Don’t forget this shit when they try it again.



Those who don’t learn history and all that whatnot 🤦🏾‍♀️
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: libertybill:
jooshcraft:


theyoungpatriot1776:


friendlyalien:


klubbhead:

friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt:


thestarsareundecided:

landysbear:


kompanie-mutter:


the-mighty-birdy:

friendly-neighborhood-patriarch:

libertybill:


libertybill:

libertybill:
Uh hey, CNN, why?
HEY UH NYT?? WHY??


HEY UH WASHINGTON POST UH??? WHY???


Eeeyup

In a world of these chucklefucks, ironically
be Buzzfeed

holy shit


WHAT THE FUCK CNN


Isn’t she the Minister of Propaganda or something? 



propaganda guru, communications aide, administrative gatekeeper
yes. 
our friends over at nbc also used some creepily similar phrasing to the other major news sources above btw, including comparing her to ivanka trump, although the headline for their piece is more neutral & less glowing. theyre still treating her like some kind of celebrity, & comparing her favorably to various member of the trump administration/family.
i cant believe buzzfeed had to be a voice of reason in the press here.
buzzfeed.
that is horrifying.


We’ve jumped timelines 
AGAIN



The terrifying timeline where I have to agree with goddamn Buzzfeed.



This feels vaguely like those occasions where an Onion article hits too close to the truth.



Vaguely Attractive Communist Woman Lauded by Media Following Gulag PR Campaign. 



Don’t forget this shit when they try it again.



Those who don’t learn history and all that whatnot 🤦🏾‍♀️
                
            

            
            
libertybill:
jooshcraft:


theyoungpatriot1776:


friendlyalien:


klubbhead:

friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt:


thestarsareundecided:

l...

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    


    

        
        
    




                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: prismatic-bell:
the-invisible-self:

pulmonary-poultry:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


mandalorianreynolds:

kuriquinn:

prismatic-bell:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


prismatic-bell:


broken-bits-of-dreams:

prismatic-bell:


aiko-mori-hates-pedos:

artbymoga:
Throwback to all these Jesus comics I drew in 2012…

Good post OP


Good post, OP, and if you ever decide to do another may I please suggest “NOT IN HEBREW IT DOESN’T” as a punchline? So much of the Old Testament is HORRIFICALLY translated from the Tanakh, it drives me batty.


WAIT WAIT WHAT DOES IT SAY?????? I NEED TO LIKE,, DESTROY MI MUM FOR BEING REALLY HOMOPHOBIC

Okay, so, strictly speaking, the infamous Leviticus 18:22 does say “forbidden.” Here’s the thing: 

1) The word translated as “forbidden” is “toevah.” While that translation isn’t … wrong, it’s sort of like saying “McMansion” means “really big house.” There are a lot of connotations in that word. The specific issue with toevah is that we … sort of … don’t know anymore exactly what it meant. Based on context, it seems likely that the word referred to something ritually forbidden. This part of Torah was written not only as a guide for future generations, but also to say “so, look around, see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT.“ Thus, if we interpret “toevah” to mean something that’s forbidden to do as a ritual before G-d, then the verse says nothing whatsoever about Adam and Steve and their two kids and their dog–it’s saying you shouldn’t have sex with another man in the Temple as a sacrifice.

2) Following the same “this is ritually forbidden” logic of toevah, this verse may also be interpreted as “don’t do sex magic,” which was a thing in. Like. A lot of fucking cultures at the time.

3) Hebrew is a highly gendered language, and the grammatical gender in this verse is really really weird. One of the “men” in this verse is given female grammar. Why? Who fucking knows, man, this isn’t the only grammatical oddity in Torah. (There are also places where G-d is referred to as plural, and also as female.) One suggestion is that this is a way of creating a diminutive–that is, that the verse should be read as “a man should not lie with a boy.” Now, it’s worth noting that modern secular scholarship has concluded the written Torah was written down around the 6th century BCE, and most non-Orthodox Jewish scholars are like “yeah, all things considered, that sounds pretty legit.” 

Do you know what else was happening around the 6th century BCE? What laypeople tend to mean when they say “ancient Greece” was happening. 

Do you know what happened a lot in that time period in Greece? Dudes forming relationships with younger boys, like ages 10-15, and using them for sex in exchange for financial gifts, mentorship, etc. While we don’t know just how young some of these younger boys may have been, we do know some were prepubescent. In light of this, and also something I mentioned under the first point–”see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT,” if this verse is interpreted to say “a man should not lie with a boy,” then it’s pretty clearly “my dudes, my fellows, my lads, don’t be fucking pedophiles.” 

4) Because of the grammar I mentioned in #3, it’s also possible that “should not lie with a man as with a woman” is actually referring to a place, not an abstract personhood: a man shouldn’t have sex with another man in a woman’s bed. In the time period, a woman’s bed was sort of like–that was her place, her safe sanctuary. It was also a ritually holy place where babies were made. By having sex in her bed, you’re violating her safe space (and also introducing a man who may not be a male relative, thus forcing her into breaking the laws of modesty). If this verse is read this way, then it should be taken to mean “don’t sexually violate a woman’s safety and modesty.”5) And as an offshoot of #4, this may be a second verse relating to infidelity. Which woman’s bed is any random dude in 600 BCE most likely to have access to? His wife’s. But laws were administered differently based on whether the person they pertained to was slave or free, male or female, and so on–thus, a man committing adultery with a woman would be treated differently than man committing adultery with a man (especially because the latter would carry no chance of an illegitimate pregnancy).


So you’ll note, there are a lot of ways to read this verse, and only a one-to-one translation with no cultural awareness produces “being gay is wrong, all of the time”.(You’ll also notice the word “abomination” is nowhere to be found. That’s like … a straight-up fiction created for who only knows what reason.)


Apparently tumblr mobile doesn’t want to show @prismatic-bell ’s long and in-depth essay, so here’s the screenshots, because it still shows up on mobile browsers:








Much appreciated.


I love when scholarship and history debunks bullshit



…I sadly have more bullshit to report.

“removed for violating guidelines”, EVERY screenshot.



…goddamnit







Let’s try this again



I am horrified that @prismatic-bell keeps getting censored + this info is gold. 

Many thanks, @pulmonary-poultry. This isn’t the only Jewish post of mine that’s mysteriously stopped showing up in searches and/or vanished from my blog entirely, but it is the one I get the most requests to repost, so this saves me from having to rewrite the whole damned essay. @the-invisible-self, thanks for bringing it to my attention that someone was able to preserve the post!

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: prismatic-bell:
the-invisible-self:

pulmonary-poultry:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


mandalorianreynolds:

kuriquinn:

prismatic-bell:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


prismatic-bell:


broken-bits-of-dreams:

prismatic-bell:


aiko-mori-hates-pedos:

artbymoga:
Throwback to all these Jesus comics I drew in 2012…

Good post OP


Good post, OP, and if you ever decide to do another may I please suggest “NOT IN HEBREW IT DOESN’T” as a punchline? So much of the Old Testament is HORRIFICALLY translated from the Tanakh, it drives me batty.


WAIT WAIT WHAT DOES IT SAY?????? I NEED TO LIKE,, DESTROY MI MUM FOR BEING REALLY HOMOPHOBIC

Okay, so, strictly speaking, the infamous Leviticus 18:22 does say “forbidden.” Here’s the thing: 

1) The word translated as “forbidden” is “toevah.” While that translation isn’t … wrong, it’s sort of like saying “McMansion” means “really big house.” There are a lot of connotations in that word. The specific issue with toevah is that we … sort of … don’t know anymore exactly what it meant. Based on context, it seems likely that the word referred to something ritually forbidden. This part of Torah was written not only as a guide for future generations, but also to say “so, look around, see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT.“ Thus, if we interpret “toevah” to mean something that’s forbidden to do as a ritual before G-d, then the verse says nothing whatsoever about Adam and Steve and their two kids and their dog–it’s saying you shouldn’t have sex with another man in the Temple as a sacrifice.

2) Following the same “this is ritually forbidden” logic of toevah, this verse may also be interpreted as “don’t do sex magic,” which was a thing in. Like. A lot of fucking cultures at the time.

3) Hebrew is a highly gendered language, and the grammatical gender in this verse is really really weird. One of the “men” in this verse is given female grammar. Why? Who fucking knows, man, this isn’t the only grammatical oddity in Torah. (There are also places where G-d is referred to as plural, and also as female.) One suggestion is that this is a way of creating a diminutive–that is, that the verse should be read as “a man should not lie with a boy.” Now, it’s worth noting that modern secular scholarship has concluded the written Torah was written down around the 6th century BCE, and most non-Orthodox Jewish scholars are like “yeah, all things considered, that sounds pretty legit.” 

Do you know what else was happening around the 6th century BCE? What laypeople tend to mean when they say “ancient Greece” was happening. 

Do you know what happened a lot in that time period in Greece? Dudes forming relationships with younger boys, like ages 10-15, and using them for sex in exchange for financial gifts, mentorship, etc. While we don’t know just how young some of these younger boys may have been, we do know some were prepubescent. In light of this, and also something I mentioned under the first point–”see your neighbors? DON’T DO THAT,” if this verse is interpreted to say “a man should not lie with a boy,” then it’s pretty clearly “my dudes, my fellows, my lads, don’t be fucking pedophiles.” 

4) Because of the grammar I mentioned in #3, it’s also possible that “should not lie with a man as with a woman” is actually referring to a place, not an abstract personhood: a man shouldn’t have sex with another man in a woman’s bed. In the time period, a woman’s bed was sort of like–that was her place, her safe sanctuary. It was also a ritually holy place where babies were made. By having sex in her bed, you’re violating her safe space (and also introducing a man who may not be a male relative, thus forcing her into breaking the laws of modesty). If this verse is read this way, then it should be taken to mean “don’t sexually violate a woman’s safety and modesty.”5) And as an offshoot of #4, this may be a second verse relating to infidelity. Which woman’s bed is any random dude in 600 BCE most likely to have access to? His wife’s. But laws were administered differently based on whether the person they pertained to was slave or free, male or female, and so on–thus, a man committing adultery with a woman would be treated differently than man committing adultery with a man (especially because the latter would carry no chance of an illegitimate pregnancy).


So you’ll note, there are a lot of ways to read this verse, and only a one-to-one translation with no cultural awareness produces “being gay is wrong, all of the time”.(You’ll also notice the word “abomination” is nowhere to be found. That’s like … a straight-up fiction created for who only knows what reason.)


Apparently tumblr mobile doesn’t want to show @prismatic-bell ’s long and in-depth essay, so here’s the screenshots, because it still shows up on mobile browsers:








Much appreciated.


I love when scholarship and history debunks bullshit



…I sadly have more bullshit to report.

“removed for violating guidelines”, EVERY screenshot.



…goddamnit







Let’s try this again



I am horrified that @prismatic-bell keeps getting censored + this info is gold. 

Many thanks, @pulmonary-poultry. This isn’t the only Jewish post of mine that’s mysteriously stopped showing up in searches and/or vanished from my blog entirely, but it is the one I get the most requests to repost, so this saves me from having to rewrite the whole damned essay. @the-invisible-self, thanks for bringing it to my attention that someone was able to preserve the post!

                
            

            
            
prismatic-bell:
the-invisible-self:

pulmonary-poultry:

the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99:


mandalorianreynolds:

kuriquinn:

prismatic-bell...

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: trans-mom:
Claim: “Trans” is short for “transition.”
The Truth: “Trans” is short for “transgender.” It is just a descriptor of a person’s gender.
Claim: You must experience dysphoria in order to be trans.
The Truth: Incorrect. Dysphoria is an old, outdated term that’s been redefined over time to cover new specific needs. Despite its constant redefining, it’s still not an all encompassing descriptor for all trans people.
Claim: You must pursue hrt and surgery to be trans.
The Truth: Incorrect. There are a variety of reasons why someone wouldn’t want to have hrt or surgery, all of them valid.
Claim: If you’re trans, you’d show very specific signs as a child. / All trans people knew they were trans since a young age.
The Truth: A lot of trans people do not possess obvious signs of their transhood as children. Lots of people discover themselves later in life. Your age does not dictate your transhood. 
Claim: Transition is solely defined by hrt or surgery.
The Truth: Transition begins from the moment you feel you’re trans and need to alter things in your life. Transition isn’t only medical. It’s also social, but most of all it’s personal. Something like making a plan to come out in the future is part of your transition.
Claim: You have to come out to everyone.
The Truth: That’s personal information you owe no one. 
Claim: Most trans people detransition.
The Truth: Detransitioning is rare. And in most cases it’s because of financial and safety (read: bigoted harm) reasons. The claim that most trans people detransition is based on an old study where the kids were exposed to anti-lgbt rhetoric and when people didn’t return his calls he marked them as “detransitioned.” The amount of people who detransition cuz they “weren’t trans” is extremely rare.
Claim: Being on hrt will make you more depressed.
The Truth: Incorrect. Statistics show that the majority of trans people’s lives improve with hrt. What actually would cause depression is the constant harassment and harm from bigots, often times from the same people who told you hrt will make you depressed. Hrt itself is documented to improve the quality of life.
Claim: You don’t need hrt. There are pills on the market made from natural means that will give you the same result without a prescription.
The Truth: This is not only false, but it’s a money making scheme meant to exploit your lack of easy access to hrt. These pills will not work, they will actually have the opposite effect, and they cost the same as obtaining hrt without a prescription on average.
Claim: You absolutely must have a prescription for hrt. It’s illegal to get it without and you’ll die if you don’t have proper understanding.
The Truth: Morality isn’t dictated by legality. And, though some dangers exist with self medicating with no knowledge, as someone that did self medicated hrt it’s not impossible for you to get educated. Testosterone poses more legal risks and you need to be sure what you’re getting is the real deal with T, but the need to do things this way is a sign the system is broken - not that there’s something wrong with the people doing it.
For information about feminizing hormones, go here.
For information about masculinizing hormones, go here.
Claim: You can get hrt through Planned Parenthood.
The Truth: Accurate! Planned Parenthood does offer hrt on an informed consent basis in some places. This is not true to everywhere so maybe call them or check their own web site about it before just dropping in. Smallangryandtired did an excellent write up on how to do the process here. 
However, as I said, they do not offer it in all locations. The main path a lot of people take is going to a therapist for a session or two and getting a letter from said therapist approving you for hrt and taking that to a doctor (who in turn usually recommends you to a specialist).
Claim: After a certain age, there’s no point to do hrt. It won’t have the same effect.
The Truth: That is a lie. Hrt will work no matter your age.
Claim: You can be too young for hrt and puberty blockers are dangerous.
The Truth: That is also a lie. Lots of people have known they’re trans since they were kids and refusing them treatment is child abuse. If a doctor deems a kid too young for hrt, the alternative is puberty blockers because they are not harmful to the child at all. Despite what anti-lgbt groups want you to believe, there is no danger to puberty blockers.
Claim: There are only two genders. / Nonbinary people don’t exist. / Biological sex dictates gender.
The Truth: The biological sex you know is only truly representative of gender stereotypes. The truth is that, biologically speaking, there are more than two sexes and the only true way to identify such is through karyotypes. Third genders and nonbinary genders have existed through out history, it is not new. The greatest minds in science have time and time again repeated this information, that sex isn’t a binary, that nonbinary people exist, that trans women are really women, trans men are men, and that nonbinary people are nonbinary. Even Bill Nye has said this.
Claim: Things like “stargender” or “noungender” are ruining the representation of the trans community. / “Noungender” is just children trying to get attention and are not actually trans. / People using neopronouns or nounself pronouns are not really trans.
The Truth: This in inaccurate and often times either a bullying tactic towards those who are different, or transphobic people using such to isolate a group of trans people. Some people do not fit into the binary or gender nor feel like they’re in any defined nonbinary genders. So they’ll define themselves with words and terms they enjoy. It’s no different from you feeling more comfort from being called “he” versus “she.” 
And, in the off chance it is someone just seeking attention. It doesn’t matter. Let them have their fun. They’re not ruining anything calling themselves spacegender on tumblr dot com.
Claim: There are people faking being trans to fit into a crowd. / The entire concept of “transtrenders.”
The Truth: Not true. This is just age old blatant “you’re faking” transphobia. 
Claim: Trans people on hrt or post-op can not experience sexual enjoyment.
The Truth: Both will change your body’s entire response to sex. Your enjoyment doesn’t disappear, the entire process just changes to something different. This inaccuracy is spread by transphobes on average and isn’t remotely true.
Claim: Trans people have a high rate of suicide.
The Truth: I’m sorry to say that trans people are under the stress of discrimination from all angles, and on top of other stresses or discriminations one may experience, it leads us into suicidal ideation. But, that’s why we need to stick together and help each other out. If you’re trans and considering suicide, consider the following:
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:  1-800-273-8255
Trans Lifeline USA:  1-877-565-8860
Trans Lifeline Canada: 1-877-330-6366
The Trevor Project Hotline:  1-866-488-7386
The Trevor Project also offers texting and chat
You deserve to live your life. I promise you you’re strong enough to get through this.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: trans-mom:
Claim: “Trans” is short for “transition.”
The Truth: “Trans” is short for “transgender.” It is just a descriptor of a person’s gender.
Claim: You must experience dysphoria in order to be trans.
The Truth: Incorrect. Dysphoria is an old, outdated term that’s been redefined over time to cover new specific needs. Despite its constant redefining, it’s still not an all encompassing descriptor for all trans people.
Claim: You must pursue hrt and surgery to be trans.
The Truth: Incorrect. There are a variety of reasons why someone wouldn’t want to have hrt or surgery, all of them valid.
Claim: If you’re trans, you’d show very specific signs as a child. / All trans people knew they were trans since a young age.
The Truth: A lot of trans people do not possess obvious signs of their transhood as children. Lots of people discover themselves later in life. Your age does not dictate your transhood. 
Claim: Transition is solely defined by hrt or surgery.
The Truth: Transition begins from the moment you feel you’re trans and need to alter things in your life. Transition isn’t only medical. It’s also social, but most of all it’s personal. Something like making a plan to come out in the future is part of your transition.
Claim: You have to come out to everyone.
The Truth: That’s personal information you owe no one. 
Claim: Most trans people detransition.
The Truth: Detransitioning is rare. And in most cases it’s because of financial and safety (read: bigoted harm) reasons. The claim that most trans people detransition is based on an old study where the kids were exposed to anti-lgbt rhetoric and when people didn’t return his calls he marked them as “detransitioned.” The amount of people who detransition cuz they “weren’t trans” is extremely rare.
Claim: Being on hrt will make you more depressed.
The Truth: Incorrect. Statistics show that the majority of trans people’s lives improve with hrt. What actually would cause depression is the constant harassment and harm from bigots, often times from the same people who told you hrt will make you depressed. Hrt itself is documented to improve the quality of life.
Claim: You don’t need hrt. There are pills on the market made from natural means that will give you the same result without a prescription.
The Truth: This is not only false, but it’s a money making scheme meant to exploit your lack of easy access to hrt. These pills will not work, they will actually have the opposite effect, and they cost the same as obtaining hrt without a prescription on average.
Claim: You absolutely must have a prescription for hrt. It’s illegal to get it without and you’ll die if you don’t have proper understanding.
The Truth: Morality isn’t dictated by legality. And, though some dangers exist with self medicating with no knowledge, as someone that did self medicated hrt it’s not impossible for you to get educated. Testosterone poses more legal risks and you need to be sure what you’re getting is the real deal with T, but the need to do things this way is a sign the system is broken - not that there’s something wrong with the people doing it.
For information about feminizing hormones, go here.
For information about masculinizing hormones, go here.
Claim: You can get hrt through Planned Parenthood.
The Truth: Accurate! Planned Parenthood does offer hrt on an informed consent basis in some places. This is not true to everywhere so maybe call them or check their own web site about it before just dropping in. Smallangryandtired did an excellent write up on how to do the process here. 
However, as I said, they do not offer it in all locations. The main path a lot of people take is going to a therapist for a session or two and getting a letter from said therapist approving you for hrt and taking that to a doctor (who in turn usually recommends you to a specialist).
Claim: After a certain age, there’s no point to do hrt. It won’t have the same effect.
The Truth: That is a lie. Hrt will work no matter your age.
Claim: You can be too young for hrt and puberty blockers are dangerous.
The Truth: That is also a lie. Lots of people have known they’re trans since they were kids and refusing them treatment is child abuse. If a doctor deems a kid too young for hrt, the alternative is puberty blockers because they are not harmful to the child at all. Despite what anti-lgbt groups want you to believe, there is no danger to puberty blockers.
Claim: There are only two genders. / Nonbinary people don’t exist. / Biological sex dictates gender.
The Truth: The biological sex you know is only truly representative of gender stereotypes. The truth is that, biologically speaking, there are more than two sexes and the only true way to identify such is through karyotypes. Third genders and nonbinary genders have existed through out history, it is not new. The greatest minds in science have time and time again repeated this information, that sex isn’t a binary, that nonbinary people exist, that trans women are really women, trans men are men, and that nonbinary people are nonbinary. Even Bill Nye has said this.
Claim: Things like “stargender” or “noungender” are ruining the representation of the trans community. / “Noungender” is just children trying to get attention and are not actually trans. / People using neopronouns or nounself pronouns are not really trans.
The Truth: This in inaccurate and often times either a bullying tactic towards those who are different, or transphobic people using such to isolate a group of trans people. Some people do not fit into the binary or gender nor feel like they’re in any defined nonbinary genders. So they’ll define themselves with words and terms they enjoy. It’s no different from you feeling more comfort from being called “he” versus “she.” 
And, in the off chance it is someone just seeking attention. It doesn’t matter. Let them have their fun. They’re not ruining anything calling themselves spacegender on tumblr dot com.
Claim: There are people faking being trans to fit into a crowd. / The entire concept of “transtrenders.”
The Truth: Not true. This is just age old blatant “you’re faking” transphobia. 
Claim: Trans people on hrt or post-op can not experience sexual enjoyment.
The Truth: Both will change your body’s entire response to sex. Your enjoyment doesn’t disappear, the entire process just changes to something different. This inaccuracy is spread by transphobes on average and isn’t remotely true.
Claim: Trans people have a high rate of suicide.
The Truth: I’m sorry to say that trans people are under the stress of discrimination from all angles, and on top of other stresses or discriminations one may experience, it leads us into suicidal ideation. But, that’s why we need to stick together and help each other out. If you’re trans and considering suicide, consider the following:
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:  1-800-273-8255
Trans Lifeline USA:  1-877-565-8860
Trans Lifeline Canada: 1-877-330-6366
The Trevor Project Hotline:  1-866-488-7386
The Trevor Project also offers texting and chat
You deserve to live your life. I promise you you’re strong enough to get through this.

                
            

            
            
trans-mom:
Claim: “Trans” is short for “transition.”
The Truth: “Trans” is short for “transgender.” It is just a descriptor of a person’s...

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: Anyone else following this tutorial?
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Anyone else following this tutorial?
                
            

            
            
Anyone else following this tutorial?

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: Just following the doctors orders
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Just following the doctors orders
                
            

            
            
Just following the doctors orders

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: whatevercomestomymind:

dovewithscales:

nederboo:

themoonkilledmyagenda:

cataclysmofstars:

aphnorwegian:

mxcleod:


egalitarianqueen:


kibosh-josh-mahgosh:


egalitarianqueen:

rougaroucojones:

radarmatt:


rougaroucojones:

karolinedianne:

spangledshieldsandsilverwings:

Gif stands for Graphics Interchange Format. when graphics is pronounced “JAFFICKS” Then I will pronounce Gif with a “J”

^ This


It’s followed by an R of course it would be a hard g. But Giraffe is a soft g. Genius is a soft g. Gin is pronounced with a soft g too. GIF is I following a g, it would be pronounced with a soft g.


It aint Jif peanut butter though.


It would still be pronounced like that. The general rule is if the g is followed by an e or i, it’s soft g. U or a consonant is generally a hard g.


I will DIE WITH MY HONOR


Gear =/= Jear
Get =/= Jet
Gift =/= Jift
Give =/= Jive
In English, words with a ‘G’ followed by an ‘e’ or an ‘i’ can be pronounced with either a hard ‘G’ or a soft ‘G’.
Words with Germanic roots such as ‘gear’, ‘get’, ‘gift’, ‘give’ (see above) are pronounced with a hard ‘g’ while words with Latin or Greek roots such as ‘gem’, ‘general’, ‘giraffe’, ‘giant’, are pronounced with a soft ‘g’.
So no, it’s not exactly a “general rule” that ‘g’ followed by an ‘e’ or an ‘i’ makes a soft ‘g’ sound. 
Additionally, “GIF” is an ACRONYM starting with a word that begins with a hard ‘g’ sound, so “GIF” is therefore pronounced with a hard ‘g’.


We fight with honor





via @greenwoodthegreat. I could not have said it better, my friend.


Thor agrees. 


This is a perfect compromise, it makes everyone unhappy.


You know, I can’t argue with that.



Its FUCKINGG I F
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: whatevercomestomymind:

dovewithscales:

nederboo:

themoonkilledmyagenda:

cataclysmofstars:

aphnorwegian:

mxcleod:


egalitarianqueen:


kibosh-josh-mahgosh:


egalitarianqueen:

rougaroucojones:

radarmatt:


rougaroucojones:

karolinedianne:

spangledshieldsandsilverwings:

Gif stands for Graphics Interchange Format. when graphics is pronounced “JAFFICKS” Then I will pronounce Gif with a “J”

^ This


It’s followed by an R of course it would be a hard g. But Giraffe is a soft g. Genius is a soft g. Gin is pronounced with a soft g too. GIF is I following a g, it would be pronounced with a soft g.


It aint Jif peanut butter though.


It would still be pronounced like that. The general rule is if the g is followed by an e or i, it’s soft g. U or a consonant is generally a hard g.


I will DIE WITH MY HONOR


Gear =/= Jear
Get =/= Jet
Gift =/= Jift
Give =/= Jive
In English, words with a ‘G’ followed by an ‘e’ or an ‘i’ can be pronounced with either a hard ‘G’ or a soft ‘G’.
Words with Germanic roots such as ‘gear’, ‘get’, ‘gift’, ‘give’ (see above) are pronounced with a hard ‘g’ while words with Latin or Greek roots such as ‘gem’, ‘general’, ‘giraffe’, ‘giant’, are pronounced with a soft ‘g’.
So no, it’s not exactly a “general rule” that ‘g’ followed by an ‘e’ or an ‘i’ makes a soft ‘g’ sound. 
Additionally, “GIF” is an ACRONYM starting with a word that begins with a hard ‘g’ sound, so “GIF” is therefore pronounced with a hard ‘g’.


We fight with honor





via @greenwoodthegreat. I could not have said it better, my friend.


Thor agrees. 


This is a perfect compromise, it makes everyone unhappy.


You know, I can’t argue with that.



Its FUCKINGG I F
                
            

            
            
whatevercomestomymind:

dovewithscales:

nederboo:

themoonkilledmyagenda:

cataclysmofstars:

aphnorwegian:

mxcleod:


egalitarianqueen...

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    


    

        
        
    




                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: Britney Spears
 @britneyspears
 Following
 Fancy running into this guy!Sucha
 sweetheart!!

 Well, I was at LAX. I was flying alone to Hawaii. I
 was waitingiformy flight to board.lsaw a woman
 approaching me..."

 "She came up and said, Oh, Mr. O'Neill, I love
 Modern,Family. You're my favorite on the
 show. Could you please?"

 "Sothe next day m manager texts me
 What is this?' Fifty-three thousand likes!
 didn't know it was her

 Lookatthe look on my face Do l Look
 like Pm sitting With Britney Spears?
foxhack:

aggressivelynihilistic:

buzzfeed:
Ed O’Neill Didn’t Realize He Took A Picture With Britney Spears Until A Day Later

I have this theory that Britney is one of those celebrities who can like… turn it on, nd can choose to have that aura about her, and when she doesn’t want to be ~Britney Spears~ she can just turn it off again 

I saw this comment and had to reblog it. She really does. After the therapy she went through a few years back (because of all the messed up things she had happen to her growing up), she’s a regular mom who also happens to be a musical superstar.
Look at her in the photo. She doesn’t even look like glamorous. She looks like… a thirty-ish year old mom who sits down and watches Ed O’Neill on TV every week after helping her kids do homework. Perfectly average.
And that’s a good thing. I’m glad she’s happy now.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Britney Spears
 @britneyspears
 Following
 Fancy running into this guy!Sucha
 sweetheart!!

 Well, I was at LAX. I was flying alone to Hawaii. I
 was waitingiformy flight to board.lsaw a woman
 approaching me..."

 "She came up and said, Oh, Mr. O'Neill, I love
 Modern,Family. You're my favorite on the
 show. Could you please?"

 "Sothe next day m manager texts me
 What is this?' Fifty-three thousand likes!
 didn't know it was her

 Lookatthe look on my face Do l Look
 like Pm sitting With Britney Spears?
foxhack:

aggressivelynihilistic:

buzzfeed:
Ed O’Neill Didn’t Realize He Took A Picture With Britney Spears Until A Day Later

I have this theory that Britney is one of those celebrities who can like… turn it on, nd can choose to have that aura about her, and when she doesn’t want to be ~Britney Spears~ she can just turn it off again 

I saw this comment and had to reblog it. She really does. After the therapy she went through a few years back (because of all the messed up things she had happen to her growing up), she’s a regular mom who also happens to be a musical superstar.
Look at her in the photo. She doesn’t even look like glamorous. She looks like… a thirty-ish year old mom who sits down and watches Ed O’Neill on TV every week after helping her kids do homework. Perfectly average.
And that’s a good thing. I’m glad she’s happy now.

                
            

            
            
foxhack:

aggressivelynihilistic:

buzzfeed:
Ed O’Neill Didn’t Realize He Took A Picture With Britney Spears Until A Day Later

I have th...

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    


    

        
        
    




                
            
        
        

            







    following: meselfandwhy:

“Welcome home!”
A little request from ryupioupiou 
I guess the little demon extermination was tougher than they expected.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: meselfandwhy:

“Welcome home!”
A little request from ryupioupiou 
I guess the little demon extermination was tougher than they expected.
                
            

            
            
meselfandwhy:

“Welcome home!”
A little request from ryupioupiou 
I guess the little demon extermination was tougher than they expected.

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: Danimate-mush
 2 Follow
 The BitterSweet Life
 @BitterSweetPod
 Interviewed a little girl this morning that feeds
 crows and they bring her gifts in return.
 Here's her collection.
 tetraghost
 i wish birds brought ME presents
 baelgrave
 No, but think about this.
 The crows she feeds obviously have their own little lives. They go
 about their business, and they spot *pretty thing* or lunique thing/ in
 question. What gets me is that the *first* thing on their minds as
 recipient of this thing is the little girl that feeds them.
 They spot a thing, and immediately must think, "that nice girl with
 delicious foodstuffs must have this to show my gratitude."
 2 kedreeva
 It's actually more than that, though, if you read the articles or watch
 the videos. This has taken place over YEARS- it started with these
 birds following this little girl around because she was a messy eater
 and it has turned into a ritual for the family. They have a water station
 and food stations where they daily set out things for these birds and
 sometimes (but not always), these birds leave 'payment behind for
 the food.
 BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE
 These birds are not just taking food and leaving shinies. These birds
 are watching over this family now. Their lives have become involved.
 These crows are keeping track of this girl and her mother even when
 they are out of the yard. How do we know?
 One of them is a photographer, and one day while she was
 photographing some stuff on a bridge, she dropped her camera's
 lenscap over the edge. There was no way she could get it back, so
 she left it. When she got home, the lenscap was sitting on the edge
 of one of the feeding stations, waiting for her.
 Not only were the birds following and watching over her, they were
 smart enough to realize she dropped an Important Thing and cared
 enough to bring it back to her.
 Source: tetraghost #animais #stories #tiny humans
 #THIS IS ADORABLE
 1,268,331 notes
Be kind to animals
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Danimate-mush
 2 Follow
 The BitterSweet Life
 @BitterSweetPod
 Interviewed a little girl this morning that feeds
 crows and they bring her gifts in return.
 Here's her collection.
 tetraghost
 i wish birds brought ME presents
 baelgrave
 No, but think about this.
 The crows she feeds obviously have their own little lives. They go
 about their business, and they spot *pretty thing* or lunique thing/ in
 question. What gets me is that the *first* thing on their minds as
 recipient of this thing is the little girl that feeds them.
 They spot a thing, and immediately must think, "that nice girl with
 delicious foodstuffs must have this to show my gratitude."
 2 kedreeva
 It's actually more than that, though, if you read the articles or watch
 the videos. This has taken place over YEARS- it started with these
 birds following this little girl around because she was a messy eater
 and it has turned into a ritual for the family. They have a water station
 and food stations where they daily set out things for these birds and
 sometimes (but not always), these birds leave 'payment behind for
 the food.
 BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE
 These birds are not just taking food and leaving shinies. These birds
 are watching over this family now. Their lives have become involved.
 These crows are keeping track of this girl and her mother even when
 they are out of the yard. How do we know?
 One of them is a photographer, and one day while she was
 photographing some stuff on a bridge, she dropped her camera's
 lenscap over the edge. There was no way she could get it back, so
 she left it. When she got home, the lenscap was sitting on the edge
 of one of the feeding stations, waiting for her.
 Not only were the birds following and watching over her, they were
 smart enough to realize she dropped an Important Thing and cared
 enough to bring it back to her.
 Source: tetraghost #animais #stories #tiny humans
 #THIS IS ADORABLE
 1,268,331 notes
Be kind to animals
                
            

            
            
Be kind to animals

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: Danimate-mush
 2 Follow
 The BitterSweet Life
 @BitterSweetPod
 Interviewed a little girl this morning that feeds
 crows and they bring her gifts in return.
 Here's her collection.
 tetraghost
 i wish birds brought ME presents
 baelgrave
 No, but think about this.
 The crows she feeds obviously have their own little lives. They go
 about their business, and they spot *pretty thing* or lunique thing/ in
 question. What gets me is that the *first* thing on their minds as
 recipient of this thing is the little girl that feeds them.
 They spot a thing, and immediately must think, "that nice girl with
 delicious foodstuffs must have this to show my gratitude."
 2 kedreeva
 It's actually more than that, though, if you read the articles or watch
 the videos. This has taken place over YEARS- it started with these
 birds following this little girl around because she was a messy eater
 and it has turned into a ritual for the family. They have a water station
 and food stations where they daily set out things for these birds and
 sometimes (but not always), these birds leave 'payment behind for
 the food.
 BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE
 These birds are not just taking food and leaving shinies. These birds
 are watching over this family now. Their lives have become involved.
 These crows are keeping track of this girl and her mother even when
 they are out of the yard. How do we know?
 One of them is a photographer, and one day while she was
 photographing some stuff on a bridge, she dropped her camera's
 lenscap over the edge. There was no way she could get it back, so
 she left it. When she got home, the lenscap was sitting on the edge
 of one of the feeding stations, waiting for her.
 Not only were the birds following and watching over her, they were
 smart enough to realize she dropped an Important Thing and cared
 enough to bring it back to her.
 Source: tetraghost #animais #stories #tiny humans
 #THIS IS ADORABLE
 1,268,331 notes
Be kind to animals
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Danimate-mush
 2 Follow
 The BitterSweet Life
 @BitterSweetPod
 Interviewed a little girl this morning that feeds
 crows and they bring her gifts in return.
 Here's her collection.
 tetraghost
 i wish birds brought ME presents
 baelgrave
 No, but think about this.
 The crows she feeds obviously have their own little lives. They go
 about their business, and they spot *pretty thing* or lunique thing/ in
 question. What gets me is that the *first* thing on their minds as
 recipient of this thing is the little girl that feeds them.
 They spot a thing, and immediately must think, "that nice girl with
 delicious foodstuffs must have this to show my gratitude."
 2 kedreeva
 It's actually more than that, though, if you read the articles or watch
 the videos. This has taken place over YEARS- it started with these
 birds following this little girl around because she was a messy eater
 and it has turned into a ritual for the family. They have a water station
 and food stations where they daily set out things for these birds and
 sometimes (but not always), these birds leave 'payment behind for
 the food.
 BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE
 These birds are not just taking food and leaving shinies. These birds
 are watching over this family now. Their lives have become involved.
 These crows are keeping track of this girl and her mother even when
 they are out of the yard. How do we know?
 One of them is a photographer, and one day while she was
 photographing some stuff on a bridge, she dropped her camera's
 lenscap over the edge. There was no way she could get it back, so
 she left it. When she got home, the lenscap was sitting on the edge
 of one of the feeding stations, waiting for her.
 Not only were the birds following and watching over her, they were
 smart enough to realize she dropped an Important Thing and cared
 enough to bring it back to her.
 Source: tetraghost #animais #stories #tiny humans
 #THIS IS ADORABLE
 1,268,331 notes
Be kind to animals
                
            

            
            
Be kind to animals

            
            
        

    



        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    


    

        
        
    




                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            






        

            
                
                    
                    
                
            
        
        

            







    following: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                following: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
                
            

            
            
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’