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Half: Anyone who did nazi this coming wasn’t paying attention these last three and a half years.
Half: Anyone who did nazi this coming wasn’t paying attention these last three and a half years.

Anyone who did nazi this coming wasn’t paying attention these last three and a half years.

Half: inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: sonnetscrewdriver: dat-soldier: did-you-kno: Source back the fuck up There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up. So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him. The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off. Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes. did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out This just keeps getting better I fucking love history. ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire. The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked. On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro” and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing. and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave. Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat.  and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked. Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river. Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy.  Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows. Zhuge Liang is legend. I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History. If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff. Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this: Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes. Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D
Half: inquisitorhotpants:

burntcopper:

futureevilscientist:

optimysticals:

uovoc:

konec0:

sleepyferret:

shitfacedanon:

dat-soldier:

sonnetscrewdriver:

dat-soldier:

did-you-kno:

Source


back the fuck up


There’s another story that I like about a Chinese general who had to defend a city with only a handful of soldiers from a huge enemy horde that was in all likelihood going to steamroll the place flat within hours of showing up.
So when said horde did arrive, they saw the general sitting outside the city’s open gates, drinking tea. The horde sent a couple of emissaries over to see what was what, and the general greeted them cheerfully and invited them all to come and take tea with him.
The horde decided that this was a scenario that had “MASSIVE FUCKING TRAP” written all over it in beautiful calligraphy and promptly fucked off.
Whoever that general was, he was clearly the Ancient Chinese equivalent of Sam Vimes.


did he just invite us over for tea nah man i’m out


This just keeps getting better

I fucking love history.

ok but tbh that story misses a lot of the subtlety of the situation like ok
so this story is the Romance of Three Kingdoms, and essentially takes place between Zhuge Liang, resident tactician extraordinaire, and Sima Yi… OTHER resident tactician extraordinaire.
The two were both regarded as tactical geniuses and recognized the other as their rival. Zhuge Liang had a reputation for ambushing the SHIT out of his opponents and using the environment to his advantage, thus destroying large armies with a small number of men. Sima Yi (who kind of entered the picture later) was a cautious person whose speciality was unravelling his opponent’s plans before they began. So it was natural that the two would butt heads; however, since Sima Yi tended to have more men and resources, he started winning battles against the former. Which, y’know, kinda sucked.
On to the actual story: Zhuge Liang is all like “shit i gotta defend this city with like 10 men.” Literally if he fights ANY kind of battle here, he WILL lose; his only option for survival is not to fight. And that’s looking more and more impossible until he hears that his rival is leading the opposing army. And then he gets this brilliant idea. He basically opens all the gates, sends his men out in civilian clothes to sweep the streets, and sits on top of the gate drinking tea and chilling out and basically makes the whole thing out to be a trap
When Sima Yi comes he’s all like “yo come on in bro”
and Sima Yi is like “yeah he’s never been that obvious about his traps before. this is definitely a bluff” and he’s about to head in when he realizes
wait. he knows that i think he’s bluffing.
and so he gets it in his head that maybe, just MAYBE, Zhuge Liang has this cunning plan that will wipe out his army - recall that he has a pretty good handle on what his rival is capable of. And after a long period of deliberation (which is just like “he know that I know that he knows that etc.”), being the cautious man he is, SIma Yi eventually decides to turn his entire army around and leave.
Zhuge Liang later points out that the plan was based specifically on the fact that he was facing his rival; if it had been anyone else, there’s no way it would have worked. A dumber or less cautious person would have simply charged in and won without breaking a sweat. 
and that’s the real genius here: it was a plan formed entirely just to deceive one man, and it worked.

Zhuge Liang is the most brilliant, sneaky-ass bastard in history. One time his side’s army was out of arrows, which pretty much meant they were screwed. So Zhuge Liang goes and does the logical thing, which is build a fuck ton of scarecrows and put them all on boats. Then he makes the men hide in the boats and sail them out on the river.
Well, that day was super foggy (which Zhuge Liang had predicted. Did I mention he was also a freakishly accurate meteorologist?). So the enemy across the river sees a fleet of boats armed to the teeth with what appears to be half an army of men. They panic! and start firing arrows like crazy. 
Zhuge Liang lets this play out for a while, then he’s like, ”Ok guys that’s enough.” They calmly turn the boats around and go back to base, where they dismantle the scarecrows and pull out all the enemy’s arrows.
Zhuge Liang is legend.

I love this post. It just keeps getting better. Like seriously, I would have adored learning about this in World History.

If you want to see this in cinematic glory, watch Red Cliff.
Especially since it makes Zhuge Liang look like this:
Red Cliff is 50% bloody battles and 50% eye candy and about half of that eye-candy is due to Zhuge Liang

I fully support watching Red Cliff; it’s gloriously silly entertainment during the battle scenes.

Guess what just got moved to the top of my watch list?? :D

inquisitorhotpants: burntcopper: futureevilscientist: optimysticals: uovoc: konec0: sleepyferret: shitfacedanon: dat-soldier: so...

Half: me irl by half_of_0- MORE MEMES
Half: me irl by half_of_0-
MORE MEMES

me irl by half_of_0- MORE MEMES

Half: srsfunny: They had us in the first half, not gonna lie
Half: srsfunny:

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie

srsfunny: They had us in the first half, not gonna lie

Half: Half of all boxing photos look like gay weddings
Half: Half of all boxing photos look like gay weddings

Half of all boxing photos look like gay weddings

Half: they had us in the first half ngl
Half: they had us in the first half ngl

they had us in the first half ngl

Half: they had us in the first half ngl by Buck_Morrison88 MORE MEMES
Half: they had us in the first half ngl by Buck_Morrison88
MORE MEMES

they had us in the first half ngl by Buck_Morrison88 MORE MEMES

Half: Over half of Reddit over the last week
Half: Over half of Reddit over the last week

Over half of Reddit over the last week

Half: luidilovins: gahdamnpunk: Literally no excuse ^^^ Also like… Half the characters from cowboy beebop are black or dark skinned. So git gud
Half: luidilovins:

gahdamnpunk:
Literally no excuse ^^^

Also like… Half the characters from cowboy beebop are black or dark skinned. 






So git gud

luidilovins: gahdamnpunk: Literally no excuse ^^^ Also like… Half the characters from cowboy beebop are black or dark skinned. S...

Half: And we are only half way through by AgeanAir MORE MEMES
Half: And we are only half way through by AgeanAir
MORE MEMES

And we are only half way through by AgeanAir MORE MEMES

Half: Had me in the first half, but they’re still employed by iSlingShlong MORE MEMES
Half: Had me in the first half, but they’re still employed by iSlingShlong
MORE MEMES

Had me in the first half, but they’re still employed by iSlingShlong MORE MEMES

Half: Had me in the first half, but they’re still employed
Half: Had me in the first half, but they’re still employed

Had me in the first half, but they’re still employed

Half: wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call. [Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.] LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can. Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday. This one was amazing. I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet [Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.] Frisch: Hello can you hear me? Woman: Hi, yes. Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. [Frisch is now yelling] Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU! Holy mother of FUCK they went off Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you
Half: wwwwyamd:
a-humble-waffle:


burn-brighter-than-fire:

oxfordcommaforever:

etanselian:

sexhaver:
the LAPD is having a town hall and getting fucking eviscerated
The automated YouTube captions are bad in places so here is a transcription of this incredible call.
[Video description: A Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers keeping them to two minutes. The current caller is Jon Barr.]
LAPC President Eileen Decker, responding to the question “can you hear me?”: Yes, we can.
Barr: Great. Uh, first things first: Chief Moore, you’ve got to do a better job of pretending you care about this, man. I’ve been watching you roll your eyes and offer halfhearted smirks acting like a teenager who’s falling asleep in detention. Are you not aware of the war crimes your department’s doing, or are you just that impatient to go do more of them? I see a lot of you, particularly Soboroff, only react when folks use profanity in their remarks. If you think curse words are bad, wait until you hear about these 600-plus murders your department has committed over the last seven years! As long as Moore’s out here equating peaceful protestors with cops who murder black people, you all could pretend to be as angry about murder as the F-word, okay kids? I know you’re all having a rough day, what with everyone here telling you you’re bad at your jobs. Have you considered being good at your jobs? If not, you could find new jobs in retail or restaurants. I know how desperate Garcetti is to get Angelenos consuming again during a global pandemic. Where were the curfews then, by the way? Weird. Chief Moore is morally obligated to resign. Mikey, I know you said you didn’t mean protestors are as much to blame for George Floyd’s murder as his murderers – that’s a lie! It is what you meant! And we all know it. Mikey’s made it clear in his racist actions and empty platitudes that he doesn’t care about the well-being of his constituents. He loves to tear gas them, blind them, force them indoors with curfews that are announced only a half-hour before they take effect, and racially profile as he does so! Don’t think I didn’t hear about how yesterday you sent out an alert in English saying curfew started at 5PM, and sent out an alert right after in Spanish saying it started at 6! What’s up with that, bud? All your cute Zoom background photos of the city won’t trick us into thinking you care about anyone but yourselves and what’s in your pockets. To close with a James Cameron quote, “Cops think of all non-cops as less than they are: stupid, weak, and evil. They dehumanize the people they are sworn to protect, and desensitize themselves in order to do that job.” That’s you pigs to a T. Black lives matter, act like it. Happy Tuesday.



This one was amazing. 
I’m also a big fan of this one- short and sweet 

[Video description: Zoom call featuring a video grid of seven attendees, all of whom are members of the Los Angeles Police Commission. There is a timer in the upper left corner for callers set to 30 seconds. The current caller is Jeremy Frisch.]
Frisch: Hello can you hear me?
Woman: Hi, yes. 
Frisch [getting progressively louder and angrier]: Black lives matter, defund the police. I find it disgusting that the LAPD is slaughtering peaceful protestors on the street. I had two friends go to the protest in Beverly Hills a couple days ago and the protest was peaceful until the police showed up with their excessive violent force, shooting rubber bullets and throwing tear gas. 
[Frisch is now yelling] 
Is this what you think is protecting and serving? Because I think it’s bullshit! Fuck you Michael Moore! I refuse to call you an officer or a chief because you don’t deserve those titles. You are a disgrace! Suck my dick and choke on it! I yield my time. FUCK YOU!



Holy mother of FUCK they went off



Thank you, thank you thank you for transcribing this because I was in a position with my “neutral” family where I couldn’t listen. Thank you

wwwwyamd: a-humble-waffle: burn-brighter-than-fire: oxfordcommaforever: etanselian: sexhaver: the LAPD is having a town hall and get...

Half: Half of all boxing photos look like gay weddings
Half: Half of all boxing photos look like gay weddings

Half of all boxing photos look like gay weddings

Half: luidilovins: gahdamnpunk: Literally no excuse ^^^ Also like… Half the characters from cowboy beebop are black or dark skinned. So git gud
Half: luidilovins:
gahdamnpunk:
Literally no excuse ^^^

Also like… Half the characters from cowboy beebop are black or dark skinned. 






So git gud

luidilovins: gahdamnpunk: Literally no excuse ^^^ Also like… Half the characters from cowboy beebop are black or dark skinned. So...

Half: HALF CORGI AND HALF GOLDEN RETRIEVER
Half: HALF CORGI AND HALF GOLDEN RETRIEVER

HALF CORGI AND HALF GOLDEN RETRIEVER

Half: relyonloveonceinawhile: whoopsrobots: equilateralwaffle: kotsuso: sophygurl: blindly-nostalgic: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremember: every day the same telemarketing company calls us. I’ve asked to be taken off their calling list, I’ve tried to be civil, I’ve even tried to not answer the phone, yet they’ll keep calling. So now I’ve resorted to making the phones calls as annoying as possible for them. Today I asked the person to hold while I got a pen and paper. As of now, they’ve been waiting 45 minutes. Update: I just asked him if he was still there, then when he said yes i told him i had found a pen but no paper, but that i’m still looking. It’s been an hour. I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN ON TUMBLR AND YOUTUBE WHILE THIS GUY WAITS. IT’S BEEN ALMOST AN HOUR AND A HALF Update: After an hour and 35 minutes I told him that i had found paper, but my pen was dead. He hung up. Ah well, i’ll just do it again tomorrow! You are the future As a former telemarketer, I can tell you that the only reason that guy hung on the line for so long was because he didn’t really want to make any more calls anyway and was probably reading a book or chatting with friends while you pretended to find paper and pen. He was enjoying your mischief as much, if not more, than you were. You literally gave this guy an acceptable reason to take an hour and a half break. You are his hero. He likely only finally hung up because it was officially his break time anyway. He probably told all his co-workers about your call and they’ll be laughing about it for weeks. Holy shit, is this a happy ending to a post where everybody actually wins? ACTUALLY YES because according to parental unit number one, telemarketers get paid by how long they’re on the phone with someone. so you were literally helping this friend get paid by doing absolutely shit vive la resistance Chaotic Good
Half: relyonloveonceinawhile:
whoopsrobots:

equilateralwaffle:

kotsuso:

sophygurl:

blindly-nostalgic:

itseasytoremember:

itseasytoremember:

itseasytoremember:

itseasytoremember:

every day the same telemarketing company calls us. I’ve asked to be taken off their calling list, I’ve tried to be civil, I’ve even tried to not answer the phone, yet they’ll keep calling. So now I’ve resorted to making the phones calls as annoying as possible for them.
Today I asked the person to hold while I got a pen and paper. As of now, they’ve been waiting 45 minutes.

Update:
I just asked him if he was still there, then when he said yes i told him i had found a pen but no paper, but that i’m still looking. It’s been an hour.

I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN ON TUMBLR AND YOUTUBE WHILE THIS GUY WAITS. IT’S BEEN ALMOST AN HOUR AND A HALF

Update:
After an hour and 35 minutes I told him that i had found paper, but my pen was dead. He hung up. Ah well, i’ll just do it again tomorrow!

You are the future

As a former telemarketer, I can tell you that the only reason that guy hung on the line for so long was because he didn’t really want to make any more calls anyway and was probably reading a book or chatting with friends while you pretended to find paper and pen. He was enjoying your mischief as much, if not more, than you were. You literally gave this guy an acceptable reason to take an hour and a half break. You are his hero. He likely only finally hung up because it was officially his break time anyway. He probably told all his co-workers about your call and they’ll be laughing about it for weeks.

Holy shit, is this a happy ending to a post where everybody actually wins?

ACTUALLY YES because according to parental unit number one, telemarketers get paid by how long they’re on the phone with someone. so you were literally helping this friend get paid by doing absolutely shit

vive la resistance

Chaotic Good

relyonloveonceinawhile: whoopsrobots: equilateralwaffle: kotsuso: sophygurl: blindly-nostalgic: itseasytoremember: itseasytoremembe...

Half: They had us in the first half
Half: They had us in the first half

They had us in the first half

Half: İs half life alyx counts? by secretstreamer MORE MEMES
Half: İs half life alyx counts? by secretstreamer
MORE MEMES

İs half life alyx counts? by secretstreamer MORE MEMES

Half: İs half life alyx counts?
Half: İs half life alyx counts?

İs half life alyx counts?

Half: Had us in the first half m8 by orangenada MORE MEMES
Half: Had us in the first half m8 by orangenada
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Had us in the first half m8 by orangenada MORE MEMES

Half: Had us in the first half m8
Half: Had us in the first half m8

Had us in the first half m8

Half: phantomemes: sentences from the youtube series  ,  buzzfeed unsolved .  primarily taken from season 5′s supernatural investigations . “ it doesn’t matter because you’re dead ” “ it’s not impressive  ,  no one’s impressed ” “ the spot of your death is now a lovely gift shop ” “ as god as my witness  ,  he snapped him in half ” “ i seriously want you to throw something right at my face ” “ you can live in the cave ” “ i’m a big fan of your name ” “ the fact that you steal  ,  that’s really funny to me ” “ that’s the greatest thing to steal  :  a man’s joy ” “ because i’m a masochist ” “ i’m going to regret this ” “ i’ve lost the ability to feel ” “ they’re gonna fucking murder you ” “ the way you shushed me was quite rude ” “ cowards  ,  all of you ” “ i’m strange and off putting ” “ i should not feel confident in the face of any man ” “ here you are  ,  smiling in the face of the devil ” “ i hate bats ” “ bats sometimes carry rabies and that’s a thing i’m afraid of ” “ not today devil birds  ,  not today ” “ i think i’m blacking out right now ” “ i don’t think i’m going to remember this moment ” “ i think i’m gonna cry ” “ i keep forgetting there’s ghosts in here ” “ if you know me and my debilitating fear of bears  ,  this is my worst nightmare ” “ i’m standing on an altar alone ” “ maybe you’ll wake up in the middle of the night and eat your cat ” “ i’m so glad that’s over let’s go eat taco bell ” “ were you making horse noises ? ” “ in case any of you needed a reminder this place is a twisting nightmare ” “ there’s a good chance i’m gonna fart in here ” “ well this is horrifying ” “ let’s do each other a favor and not show ourselves to each other ” “ if you could do me a big solid and not do anything that would be sublime ” “ this is just as horrifying as i thought it would be ” “ you talk to hide from the silence ” “ do i look like the kind of man who could give advice ? ” “ several bad choices have lead me to this moment ” “ let’s play look at the ceiling tiles !  1 , 2 , 3 , 4 … ” “ i just wanna know if you think they have belly buttons ” “ i did meet some of the most insufferable people but they also met me ” “ if it sounds like a duck and walks like a duck ”
Half: phantomemes:
sentences from the youtube series  ,  buzzfeed unsolved .  primarily taken from season 5′s supernatural investigations .
“ it doesn’t matter because you’re dead ”
“ it’s not impressive  ,  no one’s impressed ”
“ the spot of your death is now a lovely gift shop ”
“ as god as my witness  ,  he snapped him in half ”
“ i seriously want you to throw something right at my face ”
“ you can live in the cave ”
“ i’m a big fan of your name ”
“ the fact that you steal  ,  that’s really funny to me ”
“ that’s the greatest thing to steal  :  a man’s joy ”
“ because i’m a masochist ”
“ i’m going to regret this ”
“ i’ve lost the ability to feel ”
“ they’re gonna fucking murder you ”
“ the way you shushed me was quite rude ”
“ cowards  ,  all of you ”
“ i’m strange and off putting ”
“ i should not feel confident in the face of any man ”
“ here you are  ,  smiling in the face of the devil ”
“ i hate bats ”
“ bats sometimes carry rabies and that’s a thing i’m afraid of ”
“ not today devil birds  ,  not today ”
“ i think i’m blacking out right now ”
“ i don’t think i’m going to remember this moment ”
“ i think i’m gonna cry ”
“ i keep forgetting there’s ghosts in here ”
“ if you know me and my debilitating fear of bears  ,  this is my worst nightmare ”
“ i’m standing on an altar alone ”
“ maybe you’ll wake up in the middle of the night and eat your cat ”
“ i’m so glad that’s over let’s go eat taco bell ”
“ were you making horse noises ? ”
“ in case any of you needed a reminder this place is a twisting nightmare ”
“ there’s a good chance i’m gonna fart in here ”
“ well this is horrifying ”
“ let’s do each other a favor and not show ourselves to each other ”
“ if you could do me a big solid and not do anything that would be sublime ”
“ this is just as horrifying as i thought it would be ”
“ you talk to hide from the silence ”
“ do i look like the kind of man who could give advice ? ”
“ several bad choices have lead me to this moment ”
“ let’s play look at the ceiling tiles !  1 , 2 , 3 , 4 … ”
“ i just wanna know if you think they have belly buttons ”
“ i did meet some of the most insufferable people but they also met me ”
“ if it sounds like a duck and walks like a duck ”

phantomemes: sentences from the youtube series  ,  buzzfeed unsolved .  primarily taken from season 5′s supernatural investigations . “ i...

Half: They had me in the first half not gonna lie by lukaas69420 MORE MEMES
Half: They had me in the first half not gonna lie by lukaas69420
MORE MEMES

They had me in the first half not gonna lie by lukaas69420 MORE MEMES

Half: They had me in the first half not gonna lie
Half: They had me in the first half not gonna lie

They had me in the first half not gonna lie

Half: Not gonna lie they had us in the first half
Half: Not gonna lie they had us in the first half

Not gonna lie they had us in the first half

Half: Watch colleges beg for money after being online for just half a semester
Half: Watch colleges beg for money after being online for just half a semester

Watch colleges beg for money after being online for just half a semester

Half: They had us in the first half, not gonna lie
Half: They had us in the first half, not gonna lie

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie

Half: They had us in the first half, not gonna lie by kaasmelk MORE MEMES
Half: They had us in the first half, not gonna lie by kaasmelk
MORE MEMES

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie by kaasmelk MORE MEMES

Half: We can make the second half better everyone. Let’s aim for it!
Half: We can make the second half better everyone. Let’s aim for it!

We can make the second half better everyone. Let’s aim for it!

Half: rayethefox14524: g-blocking-antis: notice-me-cherry-pie: the-joker-hates-sjws: kaldicuct: jdbsmg-star: henryismywaifu: tinybookling: littleblackchat: lifeiscaulscott: semiauto14: daissychainss: dilfweed: jennaavh: madmints: takesabeating: cheshireinthemiddle: ginzers: spoopy-roxxi: ginzers: spoopy-roxxi: ginzers: Teach children that this is not ok Teach children that there’s nothing wrong with this I’m really not understanding why you think cultural appropriation would be ok, unless you are assuming that the girl in the picture is part Japanese. Yellow face yet she’s using white makeup in the traditional style but okay. Cultural appropriation isn’t a thing, hon. ☺️ Cultures should be shared by all means. I disagree. The makeup is clearly reflective of traditional Geisha makeup which is yellowface and therefore racist. Furthermore, the girl is wearing a kimono, a garment that has for ages carried cultural significance. Assuming that she is white how can you think this is ok? And cultural appropriation isn’t a thing? What rock do you live under? I suggest you educate yourself on the differences between cultural appreciation and cultural appropriation. I am japanese, in japan at this very moment. The only people who think culture shouldnt be shared are racists like you. A vast majority of Japanese people actually enjoy other people making an effort to spread and enjoy japanese culture, and encourage it. Many make businesses in deliberately taking pictures of people in kimono. A common omiage (gift) for foreigners from japanese people is traditional japanese things such as kimonos, tea seats, shisa dog statues, ect. And to top it off, basically 80 percent of japanese customs, traditions, and food, came from other countries. Japanese is an integration of different cultures, like america. Japan takes influences from places like korea, china, russia, and europe. If japan stuck to itself, there would be no tempura, japanese tea, tea ceremonies, kabuki, japanese bread, japanese curry, j- pop, anime, cars, or modern fishing techniques. The picture is not “yellow face” they are not making fun of asians. In fact, it looks like they put extra care and research into their work. The only reason that you have a problem with this is because that little girl is white and you know that it is acceptable on tumblr to crap all over white people. The only racist here is you. Rekt b t f o Dang she got shut down. Damn I’ve never hit reblog so fast in my entire fucking life Daaaaamn Pew pew pew I reblog this every time I see it I live in Japan and I’d like to back up this sentiment.  Recently a museum in Boston came under a lot of fire for allowing visitors to wear a ‘kimono’ (it was featuring a painting my Monet of a girl – a white girl – in a kimono, and the museum had replicas made that guests of ANY RACE could wear to mimic the painting, Pageant-of-the-Masters style). After protests and heated debate, the museum closed the event. I was living in Japan at the time, and out of all the *actual* Japanese people I asked, not a single one was offended by the event. Rather, they were excited that people half a world away were showing interest in their culture, and were sad that visitors could no longer enjoy the event. This party, though somewhat silly in application, is an attempt at experiencing and appreciating another culture. The mom who put this together is not an expert on Japan, but she did her best. She got a lot of things right: there are few things Japan loves more than tea, Pocky, and sakura.  Where do you draw the line for who is “allowed” to learn about Japan? If the girl were of Japanese descent, would that make it ok (even though her citizenship would be the same as the girl from the photo)? If one of the girl’s parents were from Japan, then would it be ok?  Are you only allowed to make pizza if you live in Italy? If you’re an Italian immigrant? How do we decide these things?? You can’t say you want to dismantle racism and then in the next breath make rules – based on race – for who people can wear, try, or eat, especially when the intent is obviously to have fun experiencing a culture (as opposed to having fun by making fun of a race or culture, like blackface does).  When you tell people they can only experience things ‘meant for their race’, it totally smacks of segregation to me and I can’t stand it. As someone who (obviously) loves Japan, I say let people learn about it, let people experience it, let people appreciate it. You don’t have to know every single thing about a culture to enjoy it. fucking people got owned is what, fuck i hate how people say you cant do shit when culture should be shared and is shared its how it grows and changes through fucking generations itS HOW YOU LEARN about the world and just fucking, tumblr fucking stupid like 70% of the dam time this new light Vintage post, sipping on it like fine wine. Always a fan of seeing this happen Have fun, not make fun of Same. I’m glad when people enjoy my culture, wear our traditional clothes and try our food recipes, as long as its respectful :) All people should try to learn other religions! I’m proud of this girl!
Half: rayethefox14524:

g-blocking-antis:


notice-me-cherry-pie:


the-joker-hates-sjws:

kaldicuct:

jdbsmg-star:

henryismywaifu:

tinybookling:

littleblackchat:

lifeiscaulscott:

semiauto14:

daissychainss:

dilfweed:

jennaavh:

madmints:

takesabeating:

cheshireinthemiddle:

ginzers:

spoopy-roxxi:

ginzers:

spoopy-roxxi:

ginzers:

Teach children that this is not ok

Teach children that there’s nothing wrong with this

I’m really not understanding why you think cultural appropriation would be ok, unless you are assuming that the girl in the picture is part Japanese.

Yellow face yet she’s using white makeup in the traditional style but okay.
Cultural appropriation isn’t a thing, hon. ☺️ Cultures should be shared by all means.

I disagree. The makeup is clearly reflective of traditional Geisha makeup which is yellowface and therefore racist. Furthermore, the girl is wearing a kimono, a garment that has for ages carried cultural significance. Assuming that she is white how can you think this is ok? And cultural appropriation isn’t a thing? What rock do you live under? I suggest you educate yourself on the differences between cultural appreciation and cultural appropriation.

I am japanese, in japan at this very moment. The only people who think culture shouldnt be shared are racists like you. 
A vast majority of Japanese people actually enjoy other people making an effort to spread and enjoy japanese culture, and encourage it. Many make businesses in deliberately taking pictures of people in kimono. A common omiage (gift) for foreigners from japanese people is traditional japanese things such as kimonos, tea seats, shisa dog statues, ect. 
And to top it off, basically 80 percent of japanese customs, traditions, and food, came from other countries. Japanese is an integration of different cultures, like america. Japan takes influences from places like korea, china, russia, and europe. If japan stuck to itself, there would be no tempura, japanese tea, tea ceremonies, kabuki, japanese bread, japanese curry, j- pop, anime, cars, or modern fishing techniques. The picture is not “yellow face” they are not making fun of asians. In fact, it looks like they put extra care and research into their work. 
The only reason that you have a problem with this is because that little girl is white and you know that it is acceptable on tumblr to crap all over white people. The only racist here is you.

Rekt

b t f o

Dang she got shut down.

Damn I’ve never hit reblog so fast in my entire fucking life

Daaaaamn

Pew pew pew

I reblog this every time I see it

I live in Japan and I’d like to back up this sentiment. 
Recently a museum in Boston came under a lot of fire for allowing visitors to wear a ‘kimono’ (it was featuring a painting my Monet of a girl – a white girl – in a kimono, and the museum had replicas made that guests of ANY RACE could wear to mimic the painting, Pageant-of-the-Masters style). After protests and heated debate, the museum closed the event.
I was living in Japan at the time, and out of all the *actual* Japanese people I asked, not a single one was offended by the event. Rather, they were excited that people half a world away were showing interest in their culture, and were sad that visitors could no longer enjoy the event.
This party, though somewhat silly in application, is an attempt at experiencing and appreciating another culture. The mom who put this together is not an expert on Japan, but she did her best. She got a lot of things right: there are few things Japan loves more than tea, Pocky, and sakura. 
Where do you draw the line for who is “allowed” to learn about Japan? If the girl were of Japanese descent, would that make it ok (even though her citizenship would be the same as the girl from the photo)? If one of the girl’s parents were from Japan, then would it be ok? 
Are you only allowed to make pizza if you live in Italy? If you’re an Italian immigrant? How do we decide these things??
You can’t say you want to dismantle racism and then in the next breath make rules – based on race – for who people can wear, try, or eat, especially when the intent is obviously to have fun experiencing a culture (as opposed to having fun by making fun of a race or culture, like blackface does). 
When you tell people they can only experience things ‘meant for their race’, it totally smacks of segregation to me and I can’t stand it. As someone who (obviously) loves Japan, I say let people learn about it, let people experience it, let people appreciate it. You don’t have to know every single thing about a culture to enjoy it.



fucking people got owned is what, fuck i hate how people say you cant do shit when culture should be shared and is shared its how it grows and changes through fucking generations itS HOW YOU LEARN about the world and just fucking, tumblr fucking stupid like 70% of the dam time

this new light

Vintage post, sipping on it like fine wine.

Always a fan of seeing this happen



Have fun, not make fun of



Same. I’m glad when people enjoy my culture, wear our traditional clothes and try our food recipes, as long as its respectful :)



All people should try to learn other religions! I’m proud of this girl!

rayethefox14524: g-blocking-antis: notice-me-cherry-pie: the-joker-hates-sjws: kaldicuct: jdbsmg-star: henryismywaifu: tinybookl...

Half: I’d rather have the BLUE blade slice me in half!!
Half: I’d rather have the BLUE blade slice me in half!!

I’d rather have the BLUE blade slice me in half!!

Half: Half of my facebook feed is rocking the ‘I had gum in my hair’ look by mrfiddles MORE MEMES
Half: Half of my facebook feed is rocking the ‘I had gum in my hair’ look by mrfiddles
MORE MEMES

Half of my facebook feed is rocking the ‘I had gum in my hair’ look by mrfiddles MORE MEMES

Half: Well, Elon is only half human
Half: Well, Elon is only half human

Well, Elon is only half human

Half: halovoid: porterr-robinson: v.2 this is the BEST video on the entire internet. i’ve seen this hundreds of times over half a decade and it’s THE BEST.
Half: halovoid:

porterr-robinson:
v.2
this is the BEST video on the entire internet. i’ve seen this hundreds of times over half a decade and it’s THE BEST.

halovoid: porterr-robinson: v.2 this is the BEST video on the entire internet. i’ve seen this hundreds of times over half a decade and i...

Half: This guy’s not half bad looking for a maniac
Half: This guy’s not half bad looking for a maniac

This guy’s not half bad looking for a maniac

Half: Had us in the first half Ngl
Half: Had us in the first half Ngl

Had us in the first half Ngl

Half: We didn’t even reached half of it and its already the worst year
Half: We didn’t even reached half of it and its already the worst year

We didn’t even reached half of it and its already the worst year

Half: It’s been like that for month and a half
Half: It’s been like that for month and a half

It’s been like that for month and a half

Half: Y’all think it’s a half time show!?!
Half: Y’all think it’s a half time show!?!

Y’all think it’s a half time show!?!

Half: Y’all think it’s a half time show!?! by KingPZe MORE MEMES
Half: Y’all think it’s a half time show!?! by KingPZe
MORE MEMES

Y’all think it’s a half time show!?! by KingPZe MORE MEMES

Half: He had us in the first half.
Half: He had us in the first half.

He had us in the first half.

Half: the-real-motherfucker-patrol: heartbreakkidmoxley: half-ace: featherinmycapandcheese: nerdy-chocobo: septered: cistrendered: theoreticalwitchcraft: carryonmyfallencas: nyawave: thehumorousace: theasexualityblog: This just came on my TV a minute ago. Best birthday gift ever. : O !! Y'all know asexuales means sexualities and not asexuality right you’ll notice the ace flag isn’t even on the sign Spanish person here! Asexuales means asexuals. Sexualities would be Sexualidades (and that would be wrong, like, we don’t have a word that means sexualities) pls don’t spread misinformation “the ace flag isn’t even on the sign” it quite literally is the sign mate yes totally, you can easily see by context this is totally “sexualities of mexico and latin america”…. like????? what?????? gatekeeping level: prepared to lie about the meaning of words in a language you don’t speak Also it looks like the person behind the sign is literally holding an ace flag…gatekeepers be reaching This is only a fraction of how far aphobes are willing to go to insist that the asexual community is entirely white. pal.. buddy.. my white friend, Asexuales literally meals asexual is english. and the ace flag is the fucking banner. Leave the spanish to the spanish speakers and stop acting like you know what these words mean Reminder that white exclusionists have always been on some bullshit
Half: the-real-motherfucker-patrol:
heartbreakkidmoxley:

half-ace:

featherinmycapandcheese:

nerdy-chocobo:

septered:

cistrendered:

theoreticalwitchcraft:

carryonmyfallencas:

nyawave:


thehumorousace:

theasexualityblog:

This just came on my TV a minute ago. Best birthday gift ever.

: O !!


Y'all know asexuales means sexualities and not asexuality right you’ll notice the ace flag isn’t even on the sign


Spanish person here! Asexuales means asexuals. Sexualities would be Sexualidades (and that would be wrong, like, we don’t have a word that means sexualities) pls don’t spread misinformation


“the ace flag isn’t even on the sign” it quite literally is the sign mate


yes totally, you can easily see by context this is totally “sexualities of mexico and latin america”…. like????? what??????

gatekeeping level: prepared to lie about the meaning of words in a language you don’t speak


Also it looks like the person behind the sign is literally holding an ace flag…gatekeepers be reaching


This is only a fraction of how far aphobes are willing to go to insist that the asexual community is entirely white.


pal.. buddy.. my white friend, Asexuales literally meals asexual is english. and the ace flag is the fucking banner. Leave the spanish to the spanish speakers and stop acting like you know what these words mean

Reminder that white exclusionists have always been on some bullshit

the-real-motherfucker-patrol: heartbreakkidmoxley: half-ace: featherinmycapandcheese: nerdy-chocobo: septered: cistrendered: theore...