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however: Play however you want to play. The game shouldn’t shame you for wanting to play at a lower difficulty.
however: Play however you want to play. The game shouldn’t shame you for wanting to play at a lower difficulty.

Play however you want to play. The game shouldn’t shame you for wanting to play at a lower difficulty.

however: midnight-spectrum-again: drrockbell: i-am-corbin-dallas: thehttydblog: im-a-hyperion-vault-hunter: fernacular: fernacular: urhella-gaychloe: keithislactoseintolerant: wishem: sherlock-im-not-gay: zomibom: lifeofcynch: gabbyzvolt25: kvothe-kingkiller: petroleum-hare: empresspinto: blixart: shoutsofthunder: swagginsloths: blixart: how to draw arms ? ?  holy fuck holy fuck is right… but… does it work with legs??? yes !! but how much extend ^^^^^^^^^^ I NEARLY CHOKED ENJFDFNFATFVFDF finally. i can be accurate This is too fucking great to not reblog I give it MASCLES BIG MACHO 🤣🤣 LMAOOOOOO Okay but for anyone who legit wants to know how to calculate it correctly: The elbow joint on average rests a couple inches higher than the navel, so if you measure how long the distance is from the middle of the shoulder to that point then you have the length of the upper and fore arms! So if anyone’s wondering about legs too, the simplest rule of thumb is that the length from the top of the leg to the knee is equal to the distance between the top of the leg and the bottom of the pectorals: And I wanna stress that when i say “top of the leg” i’m not talking about the crotch (please don’t flag me tumblr it’s an anatomical term) i’m talking about the point where the femur connects to the pelvis, which is higher up on the hips: It’s easier to see what I’m talking about in this photo of a man squatting:  So yeah if you use that measurement when using this technique you should get fairly realistically proportioned legs: But remember! messing with proportions is an important and fun part of character design! Know the rules first so you can then break them however you please! HOW THE HELL DID I FIND THIS POST OMG Licherally in the midst of drawing a guy and crying at how bad the arms are. Thanks Tumbles I only ever saw the part where people started drawing the limbs outrageously long and genuinely wanted to know how to fix that, so I’m really thankful to see the rest. Love this
however: midnight-spectrum-again:

drrockbell:

i-am-corbin-dallas:

thehttydblog:

im-a-hyperion-vault-hunter:

fernacular:


fernacular:

urhella-gaychloe:

keithislactoseintolerant:


wishem:

sherlock-im-not-gay:

zomibom:

lifeofcynch:

gabbyzvolt25:

kvothe-kingkiller:

petroleum-hare:

empresspinto:

blixart:

shoutsofthunder:

swagginsloths:

blixart:

how to draw arms ? ? 

holy fuck

holy fuck is right… but… does it work with legs???


yes !!

but how much extend

^^^^^^^^^^



I NEARLY CHOKED


ENJFDFNFATFVFDF

finally. i can be accurate


This is too fucking great to not reblog

I give it MASCLES
BIG MACHO


🤣🤣


LMAOOOOOO

Okay but for anyone who legit wants to know how to calculate it correctly:
The elbow joint on average rests a couple inches higher than the navel, so if you measure how long the distance is from the middle of the shoulder to that point then you have the length of the upper and fore arms!

So if anyone’s wondering about legs too, the simplest rule of thumb is that the length from the top of the leg to the knee is equal to the distance between the top of the leg and the bottom of the pectorals:
And I wanna stress that when i say “top of the leg” i’m not talking about the crotch (please don’t flag me tumblr it’s an anatomical term) i’m talking about the point where the femur connects to the pelvis, which is higher up on the hips:
It’s easier to see what I’m talking about in this photo of a man squatting: 
So yeah if you use that measurement when using this technique you should get fairly realistically proportioned legs:
But remember! messing with proportions is an important and fun part of character design! Know the rules first so you can then break them however you please!


HOW THE HELL DID I FIND THIS POST OMG




Licherally in the midst of drawing a guy and crying at how bad the arms are. Thanks Tumbles


I only ever saw the part where people started drawing the limbs outrageously long and genuinely wanted to know how to fix that, so I’m really thankful to see the rest.



Love this

midnight-spectrum-again: drrockbell: i-am-corbin-dallas: thehttydblog: im-a-hyperion-vault-hunter: fernacular: fernacular: urhell...

however: lemonsgivelife: debthestoner: rrdcooc: addakax: mysticalalleycat: politicalcdnmama: theresagooseinthemainframe: 0-memento-mori-0: justaplate: claydart: starlitskyes: frosttrix: extremedistressorstellarblowjob: queen-of-heck: brightoncemore: todayiwrotenothing: gay-jesus-probably: solongstarbird: akamine-chan: phantomofthebookstore: dragonastra: jasperzilla: moose-shampoo: if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it.  You missed some of the best ones the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean. But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean. How could you forget this one though I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR. someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do? Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for. So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it. Art world is not thrilled with that. Enter Stuart Semple. Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something. Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything. Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink” Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments. Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy. He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide. Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0. So I think we can guess who got the better deal. And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated. …But not quite. Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer. No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi. The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more. Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own. So that’s been the art world for the last two years. Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack. Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday. Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.” ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT! I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page: Two things: 1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post. 2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person. Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor. An older project, but he also did this: (x) oh dude hes metal as fuck  Every addition to this post is better than the last. Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again? Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it. Me: Me: :) Be a Stuart Semple in 2020. Use your petty to inspire and drive you.
however: lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)



Be a Stuart Semple in 2020. Use your petty to inspire and drive you.

lemonsgivelife: debthestoner: rrdcooc: addakax: mysticalalleycat: politicalcdnmama: theresagooseinthemainframe: 0-memento-mori-0:...

however: TikTok danojok86 JTikTok @snejok86 feniczoroark: injuries-in-dust: sewickedthread: coredesignixandnekonee: the-real-numbers: ilfaitdusoleil: bigwordsandsharpedges: Ball lightning is a rare electrical phenomenon. Scientists aren’t certain what creates it, and once disputed that ball lighning existed at all. Some argued that it was simply the electromagnetic field of an electrical storm causing visual hallucinations by exciting neurons in the brain, an effect called transcranial magnetic stimulation. However, recent high-definition video proved that at least some instances must be a real physical effect. Spectrograpic analysis of this images suggests that ball lightning is made of vaporized silicon contained within a self-contained electromagnetic bubble, effectively making a naturally occurring electric arc lamp. Laboratory experiments successfully replicated the glowing ball of plasma, which hovered for several seconds. Unfortunately, other lab experiments create similar visual effects using wildly different methods, including electrically-excited nanoparticles, water shocked by capacitors to simulate lightning, and a bubble of ionized gas fuelled for many seconds by a vast atmospheric energy field. The varying size of that energy-pumping field would conveniently explain the unpredictable size, duration, and electrical power levels observed in ball lightning. So we’re still not sure what that thing in the video really is, but it may be possible to create something like that in a dozen different ways. I would lose my mind like a 15th century peasant if I saw this walking down the street Me crossing the street Willow wisps? Joe Baldwin, is that you? Some historical instances of seeing g angels are now believed to have been ancient people encountering ball lighting. Don’t move, don’t shoot it, stay against the wall Artjom don’t move.
however: TikTok
 danojok86

 JTikTok
 @snejok86
feniczoroark:

injuries-in-dust:

sewickedthread:

coredesignixandnekonee:
the-real-numbers:

ilfaitdusoleil:

bigwordsandsharpedges:


Ball lightning is a rare electrical phenomenon. Scientists aren’t certain what creates it, and once disputed that ball lighning existed at all. Some argued that it was simply the electromagnetic field of an electrical storm causing visual hallucinations by exciting neurons in the brain, an effect called transcranial magnetic stimulation. 
However, recent high-definition video proved that at least some instances must be a real physical effect. Spectrograpic analysis of this images suggests that ball lightning is made of vaporized silicon contained within a self-contained electromagnetic bubble, effectively making a naturally occurring electric arc lamp. 
Laboratory experiments successfully replicated the glowing ball of plasma, which hovered for several seconds. 
Unfortunately, other lab experiments create similar visual effects using wildly different methods, including electrically-excited nanoparticles, water shocked by capacitors to simulate lightning, and a bubble of ionized gas fuelled for many seconds by a vast atmospheric energy field. 
The varying size of that energy-pumping field would conveniently explain the unpredictable size, duration, and electrical power levels observed in ball lightning.
So we’re still not sure what that thing in the video really is, but it may be possible to create something like that in a dozen different ways. 



I would lose my mind like a 15th century peasant if I saw this walking down the street 



Me crossing the street



Willow wisps?

Joe Baldwin, is that you?


Some historical instances of seeing g angels are now believed to have been ancient people encountering ball lighting.


Don’t move, don’t shoot it, stay against the wall


Artjom don’t move.

feniczoroark: injuries-in-dust: sewickedthread: coredesignixandnekonee: the-real-numbers: ilfaitdusoleil: bigwordsandsharpedges: B...

however: The A SPECIAL SUPPLEMENT AGNOS ESULT WHOSE REINCARNATION ARE YOU? you ge lests yo u should A FORTUNE-TELLING GAME FOR ALL INUYASHA FANS! Just answer the questions and you'll find out who you were in a previous life during the Warring 1. You feel something round in your stomach. YES Diagnosis A 2. You like dogs. past and we tes era NO > Go to 2 YES → Go to 4 NO → Go to 3 3. When angry, you never show it on your face. YES> Go to 5 NO → Go to 6 4. You hit first and ask questions later. YES Go to 6 NO → Go to 7 5. You care about your clothes. Diagn YES> Go to 8 NO → Go to 9 INGA OFS 6. You cannot be honest about the opposite sex. YES Go to 11 NO → Go to 9 7. You are overlooked when people are passing out snacks. YES Diagnosis E 8. You like people who have mature personalities. YES Go to 11 NO → Go to 8 YOU CAN NO → Go to 10 SOLVE YOUR dand 9. You are told that you look older than your YES Diagnosis D LOVE WORRIES WITH THIS?! actual NO → Diagnosis F age. 10. Your hair is like soft seaweed. wind and at YES Diagnosis H NO → Diagnosis G 11. It is okay to love two people at the same time. YES Diagnosis B NO → Diagnosis C TRACKED INSURED ENOSIS SULTS Diagnosis A Diagnosis B REINCARNATION OF INUYASHA KAGOME HERSELF r did you get? Your refects your current Au should learn axt and work daily to What are you Just like Inuyasha you get involved in trouble easily. However, if you try hard you will find your true path. Your personality suits a leadership position. doing?! Hurry through the Bone Eater's AAH Well! You have enough spiritual power to survive whatever happens. There is nothing to worry about! Diagnosis D Diagnosis E ה hoked in trouble dve enough power to survive whatever happens. There is spiritual easily However i you try hand you will find your true path. Your personality suits a leadership position. nothing to worry about! Diagnosis D REINCARNATION OF MIROKU Diagnosis C Diagnosis E REINCARNATION OF SHIPPO EINGARNATION OF SANGO Whatever world you live in, you You are You are unre- earnest. If you are a girl, you will be a wife markable now but you have the are easy- power to attract others. going. Your luck in love is who takes care of your husband well. If you are a boy, jou will be a good husband. If you find something you are good at, it will help you in life. Many love you, but maybe not the one you love. good. You would make a good teacher or counselor-jobs which require communication skills. Diagnosis H REINCARNATION OF NARAKU Your deep Diagnosis G Diagnosis F REINCARNATION REINCARNATION OF SESSHOMARU INUYASHA QUIZ luck in love is care of your shand well. If you are a boy, l be a good husband. If good. You would make a good teacher or counselor-jobs which require communication skills. power to attract others. Many love you, but maybe not OUR RIES find something you are d at, it will help you in life. the one you love. Diagnosis G REINCARNATION OF SESSHOMARU Diagnosis F Diagnosis H REINCARNATION OF NARAKU LEINCARNATION OF KOGA You should look both you use your talents, you will never have a prob- lem eating. Friends If Your deep feelings are powerful enough to smash rocks, but you should not hold grudges ways before you get on an iron vehi- cle or before Mass you are few, but form deep bonds with them. You should treat them with around you Vou cross roads. Your person- ality is suited to globetrotting jobs. should against people and you not fear failure. You should be honest with people you like. care. ROAD SAFETY PRAYER FOR A GOOD MATCH ACADEMIC ACHIEVEMENT kiittsune: Apparently I’m shippos reincarnation what are you? Yay i’m Sango ^-^
however: The
 A SPECIAL SUPPLEMENT
 AGNOS
 ESULT
 WHOSE
 REINCARNATION
 ARE YOU?
 you ge
 lests yo
 u should
 A FORTUNE-TELLING GAME FOR ALL INUYASHA FANS!
 Just answer the questions and you'll find out who you
 were in a previous life during the Warring
 1. You feel something round in your stomach.
 YES Diagnosis A
 2. You like dogs.
 past and we
 tes era
 NO > Go to 2
 YES → Go to 4
 NO → Go to 3
 3. When angry, you never show it on your face.
 YES> Go to 5
 NO → Go to 6
 4. You hit first and ask questions later.
 YES Go to 6
 NO → Go to 7
 5. You care about your clothes.
 Diagn
 YES> Go to 8
 NO → Go to 9
 INGA
 OFS
 6. You cannot be honest about the opposite sex.
 YES
 Go to 11
 NO → Go to 9
 7. You are overlooked when people are passing out snacks.
 YES Diagnosis E
 8. You like people who have mature personalities.
 YES Go to 11
 NO → Go to 8
 YOU CAN
 NO → Go to 10
 SOLVE YOUR
 dand
 9. You are told that you look older than your
 YES Diagnosis D
 LOVE WORRIES
 WITH THIS?!
 actual
 NO → Diagnosis F
 age.
 10. Your hair is like soft seaweed.
 wind
 and at
 YES Diagnosis H
 NO → Diagnosis G
 11. It is okay to love two people at the same time.
 YES Diagnosis B
 NO → Diagnosis C
 TRACKED
 INSURED

 ENOSIS
 SULTS
 Diagnosis A
 Diagnosis B
 REINCARNATION
 OF INUYASHA
 KAGOME
 HERSELF
 r did you get? Your
 refects your current
 Au should learn
 axt and work daily to
 What are you
 Just like
 Inuyasha you
 get involved
 in trouble
 easily.
 However, if
 you try hard you will find your
 true path. Your personality
 suits a leadership position.
 doing?! Hurry
 through the
 Bone Eater's
 AAH
 Well! You
 have enough
 spiritual power to survive
 whatever happens. There is
 nothing to worry about!
 Diagnosis D
 Diagnosis E
 ה

 hoked
 in trouble
 dve enough
 power to survive
 whatever happens. There is
 spiritual
 easily
 However i
 you try hand you will find your
 true path. Your personality
 suits a leadership position.
 nothing to worry about!
 Diagnosis D
 REINCARNATION
 OF MIROKU
 Diagnosis C
 Diagnosis E
 REINCARNATION
 OF SHIPPO
 EINGARNATION
 OF SANGO
 Whatever
 world you
 live in, you
 You are
 You are unre-
 earnest. If you
 are a girl, you
 will be a wife
 markable
 now but you
 have the
 are easy-
 power to
 attract others.
 going. Your
 luck in love is
 who takes
 care of your
 husband well. If you are a boy,
 jou will be a good husband. If
 you find something you are
 good at, it will help you in life.
 Many love you, but maybe not
 the one you love.
 good. You would make a good
 teacher or counselor-jobs
 which require communication
 skills.
 Diagnosis H
 REINCARNATION
 OF NARAKU
 Your deep
 Diagnosis G
 Diagnosis F
 REINCARNATION
 REINCARNATION
 OF SESSHOMARU
 INUYASHA QUIZ

 luck in love is
 care of your
 shand well. If you are a boy,
 l be a good husband. If
 good. You would make a good
 teacher or counselor-jobs
 which require communication
 skills.
 power to
 attract others.
 Many love you, but maybe not
 OUR
 RIES
 find something you are
 d at, it will help you in life.
 the one you love.
 Diagnosis G
 REINCARNATION
 OF SESSHOMARU
 Diagnosis F
 Diagnosis H
 REINCARNATION
 OF NARAKU
 LEINCARNATION
 OF KOGA
 You should
 look both
 you use
 your talents,
 you will never
 have a prob-
 lem eating.
 Friends
 If
 Your deep
 feelings are
 powerful
 enough to
 smash rocks,
 but you
 should not hold grudges
 ways before
 you get on
 an iron vehi-
 cle or before
 Mass
 you are few, but
 form deep bonds with them.
 You should treat them with
 around
 you
 Vou cross roads. Your person-
 ality is suited to globetrotting
 jobs.
 should
 against people and
 you
 not fear failure. You should be
 honest with people you like.
 care.
 ROAD
 SAFETY
 PRAYER
 FOR A GOOD
 MATCH
 ACADEMIC
 ACHIEVEMENT
kiittsune:

Apparently I’m shippos reincarnation what are you?



Yay i’m Sango ^-^

kiittsune: Apparently I’m shippos reincarnation what are you? Yay i’m Sango ^-^

however: Results for herbie goes thermonuclear (without quotes): How "Herbie Goes Bananas" Led to a Radioactive Disaster | Commonplace Fun ... https://commonplacefacts.wordpress.com > Mobile-friendly - May 8, 2015 - Herbie Goes Bananas, the 1980 film about a Volkswagen Beetle that is Few could have guessed, however, that it ... would play a part in one of the worst nuclear disasters in history. astrofyre: grimelords: the internet is a cauldron that you speak your wishes into and then watch on in horror as they come bubbling to the surface Ok so this was too wild for me to see and not know the context so i just looked up the article and apparently there was a nuclear site in brazil that shifted its location in 1985, abandoning its old one, but the court ordered private security to be held over the abandoned site while the outcome of lawsuits were pending after there were litigations about the contents of the area And on the one day that one of the security guards didnt show up to work, two scavangers looted the abandoned nuclear site and took a bunch of radioactive shit (including a capsule of Cesium Chloride and a Radiotherapy device core) -which they would have no idea were as dangerous as they were until later in the day when they both started displaying symptoms of radiation; vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness, external burns where the capsule had been exposed to. After breaking the radioactive core open, one of the looters noticed the contents appeared as a “glowing blue” powder-like substance. He proceeded to sell it to a local scrapyard, and the owner of said yard invited every person he could to come witness the mysterious powder. By this time, multiple of one of the looter’s fingers, and the other’s forearm had needed amputation due to the effects of direct exposure, and after 2 weeks of the radiactive goods’ theft, 6 locations had been contaminated and 112,000 people were examined for radiation exposure, about 1,000 of these people identified as having recieved “more than a year’s worth of background radiation” All because this security guard played hooky and took his family to see Herbie Goes Bananas.
however: Results for herbie goes thermonuclear
 (without quotes):

 How "Herbie Goes Bananas" Led to a
 Radioactive Disaster | Commonplace Fun ...
 https://commonplacefacts.wordpress.com >
 Mobile-friendly - May 8, 2015 - Herbie Goes
 Bananas, the 1980 film about a Volkswagen Beetle
 that is
 Few could have guessed, however, that it
 ...
 would play a part in one of the worst nuclear
 disasters in history.
astrofyre:
grimelords:
the internet is a cauldron that you speak your wishes into and then watch on in horror as they come bubbling to the surface


Ok so this was too wild for me to see and not know the context so i just looked up the article and apparently there was a nuclear site in brazil that shifted its location in 1985, abandoning its old one, but the court ordered private security to be held over the abandoned site while the outcome of lawsuits were pending after there were litigations about the contents of the area
And on the one day that one of the security guards didnt show up to work, two scavangers looted the abandoned nuclear site and took a bunch of radioactive shit (including a capsule of Cesium Chloride and a Radiotherapy device core) -which they would have no idea were as dangerous as they were until later in the day when they both started displaying symptoms of radiation; vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness, external burns where the capsule had been exposed to. 
After breaking the radioactive core open, one of the looters noticed the contents appeared as a “glowing blue” powder-like substance. He proceeded to sell it to a local scrapyard, and the owner of said yard invited every person he could to come witness the mysterious powder.
By this time, multiple of one of the looter’s fingers, and the other’s forearm had needed amputation due to the effects of direct exposure, and after 2 weeks of the radiactive goods’ theft, 6 locations had been contaminated and 112,000 people were examined for radiation exposure, about 1,000 of these people identified as having recieved “more than a year’s worth of background radiation”
All because this security guard played hooky and took his family to see Herbie Goes Bananas.

astrofyre: grimelords: the internet is a cauldron that you speak your wishes into and then watch on in horror as they come bubbling to th...

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material Sit on the floor in front of your dog. Place smaller dogs on your lap. How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand. Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz- zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other. 3 Raise the dog's nose. Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the jaw opens Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand. Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw further. Use a stick to scrape out poop from beneath the tread of your shoe. 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth. Close the mouth. Tilt up the chin. Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with swallowing. BGive the dog a treat. BE AWARE! Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow. Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill. Use your band to keep the dog's mouth closed after placing the pill in bis mouth. Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb. Dip shoe bottom into park fountain Page 27 Dry the dog. Emergency Rain Gear 7 Repeat washing, if necessary. This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48 hours before bathing a second time. Cut or tear holes in a plastic shopping bag for the dog's paws and head. Use a kitchen- or yard-sized bag for larger breeds. Carefully slip the bag over the dog's head, and ease the front and WARNING! Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can cause nausea and dizziness in humans. THANK YOU Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take HAVE A NICE DAY to deodorize it. back paws through the Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites holes. How To GIVE A DoG CPR Position the dog on her side. The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the dog is on a firm surface. 2 Kneel next to the dog. B Compress the chest. For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate every five compressions with one breath. For medium to large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath. How To GET RiD oF SKUNK ODOR ON YOUR Doc Keep the dog outside. 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water. 4 Check for a hearthbeat. 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry. The compound used to remove skunk odor 4 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin. After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found, continue with compressions. discolor fab- can 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash. Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf- ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need To give artificial respiration, tilt the dog's bead back, place hand around the muzzle, put your mouth over the nose, and breathe into the dog's more. 5 Apply mixture immediately. Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops, then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists. nose. K YO A NICE novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07
however: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material
 Sit on the floor in front of your dog.
 Place smaller dogs on your lap.
 How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe
 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand.
 Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz-
 zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other.
 3 Raise the dog's nose.
 Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the
 jaw opens
 Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your
 dominant hand.
 Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw
 further.
 Use a stick to scrape out poop from
 beneath the tread of your shoe.
 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth.
 Close the mouth.
 Tilt up the chin.
 Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with
 swallowing.
 BGive the dog a treat.
 BE AWARE!
 Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow.
 Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets
 is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines
 become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill.
 Use your band to keep the
 dog's mouth closed after
 placing the pill in bis mouth.
 Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb.
 Dip shoe bottom into park fountain
 Page 27

 Dry the dog.
 Emergency Rain Gear
 7 Repeat washing, if necessary.
 This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48
 hours before bathing a second time.
 Cut or tear holes in
 a plastic shopping
 bag for the dog's
 paws and head. Use a
 kitchen- or yard-sized
 bag for larger breeds.
 Carefully slip the bag
 over the dog's head,
 and ease the front and
 WARNING!
 Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal
 glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet
 furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can
 cause nausea and dizziness in humans.
 THANK YOU
 Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to
 anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take
 HAVE A NICE
 DAY
 to deodorize it.
 back paws through the
 Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites
 holes.
 How To GIVE A DoG CPR
 Position the dog on her side.
 The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the
 dog is on a firm surface.
 2 Kneel next to the dog.
 B Compress the chest.
 For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs
 at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the
 chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate
 every five compressions with one breath. For medium to
 large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top
 of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where
 the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to
 three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com
 pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than
 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once
 per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath.
 How To GET RiD oF SKUNK
 ODOR ON YOUR Doc
 Keep the dog outside.
 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water.
 4 Check for a hearthbeat.
 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry.
 The compound used to remove skunk odor 4
 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin.
 After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found,
 continue with compressions.
 discolor fab-
 can
 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash.
 Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of
 baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients
 will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf-
 ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need
 To give artificial
 respiration, tilt the dog's
 bead back, place hand
 around the muzzle,
 put your mouth over
 the nose, and breathe
 into the dog's
 more.
 5 Apply mixture immediately.
 Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as
 this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or
 outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and
 cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops,
 then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists.
 nose.
 K YO
 A NICE
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material Sit on the floor in front of your dog. Place smaller dogs on your lap. How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand. Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz- zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other. 3 Raise the dog's nose. Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the jaw opens Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand. Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw further. Use a stick to scrape out poop from beneath the tread of your shoe. 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth. Close the mouth. Tilt up the chin. Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with swallowing. BGive the dog a treat. BE AWARE! Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow. Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill. Use your band to keep the dog's mouth closed after placing the pill in bis mouth. Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb. Dip shoe bottom into park fountain Page 27 Dry the dog. Emergency Rain Gear 7 Repeat washing, if necessary. This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48 hours before bathing a second time. Cut or tear holes in a plastic shopping bag for the dog's paws and head. Use a kitchen- or yard-sized bag for larger breeds. Carefully slip the bag over the dog's head, and ease the front and WARNING! Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can cause nausea and dizziness in humans. THANK YOU Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take HAVE A NICE DAY to deodorize it. back paws through the Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites holes. How To GIVE A DoG CPR Position the dog on her side. The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the dog is on a firm surface. 2 Kneel next to the dog. B Compress the chest. For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate every five compressions with one breath. For medium to large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath. How To GET RiD oF SKUNK ODOR ON YOUR Doc Keep the dog outside. 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water. 4 Check for a hearthbeat. 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry. The compound used to remove skunk odor 4 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin. After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found, continue with compressions. discolor fab- can 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash. Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf- ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need To give artificial respiration, tilt the dog's bead back, place hand around the muzzle, put your mouth over the nose, and breathe into the dog's more. 5 Apply mixture immediately. Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops, then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists. nose. K YO A NICE novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07
however: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material
 Sit on the floor in front of your dog.
 Place smaller dogs on your lap.
 How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe
 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand.
 Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz-
 zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other.
 3 Raise the dog's nose.
 Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the
 jaw opens
 Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your
 dominant hand.
 Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw
 further.
 Use a stick to scrape out poop from
 beneath the tread of your shoe.
 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth.
 Close the mouth.
 Tilt up the chin.
 Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with
 swallowing.
 BGive the dog a treat.
 BE AWARE!
 Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow.
 Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets
 is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines
 become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill.
 Use your band to keep the
 dog's mouth closed after
 placing the pill in bis mouth.
 Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb.
 Dip shoe bottom into park fountain
 Page 27

 Dry the dog.
 Emergency Rain Gear
 7 Repeat washing, if necessary.
 This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48
 hours before bathing a second time.
 Cut or tear holes in
 a plastic shopping
 bag for the dog's
 paws and head. Use a
 kitchen- or yard-sized
 bag for larger breeds.
 Carefully slip the bag
 over the dog's head,
 and ease the front and
 WARNING!
 Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal
 glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet
 furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can
 cause nausea and dizziness in humans.
 THANK YOU
 Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to
 anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take
 HAVE A NICE
 DAY
 to deodorize it.
 back paws through the
 Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites
 holes.
 How To GIVE A DoG CPR
 Position the dog on her side.
 The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the
 dog is on a firm surface.
 2 Kneel next to the dog.
 B Compress the chest.
 For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs
 at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the
 chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate
 every five compressions with one breath. For medium to
 large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top
 of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where
 the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to
 three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com
 pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than
 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once
 per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath.
 How To GET RiD oF SKUNK
 ODOR ON YOUR Doc
 Keep the dog outside.
 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water.
 4 Check for a hearthbeat.
 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry.
 The compound used to remove skunk odor 4
 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin.
 After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found,
 continue with compressions.
 discolor fab-
 can
 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash.
 Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of
 baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients
 will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf-
 ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need
 To give artificial
 respiration, tilt the dog's
 bead back, place hand
 around the muzzle,
 put your mouth over
 the nose, and breathe
 into the dog's
 more.
 5 Apply mixture immediately.
 Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as
 this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or
 outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and
 cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops,
 then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists.
 nose.
 K YO
 A NICE
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material Sit on the floor in front of your dog. Place smaller dogs on your lap. How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand. Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz- zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other. 3 Raise the dog's nose. Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the jaw opens Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your dominant hand. Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw further. Use a stick to scrape out poop from beneath the tread of your shoe. 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth. Close the mouth. Tilt up the chin. Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with swallowing. BGive the dog a treat. BE AWARE! Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow. Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill. Use your band to keep the dog's mouth closed after placing the pill in bis mouth. Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb. Dip shoe bottom into park fountain Page 27 Dry the dog. Emergency Rain Gear 7 Repeat washing, if necessary. This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48 hours before bathing a second time. Cut or tear holes in a plastic shopping bag for the dog's paws and head. Use a kitchen- or yard-sized bag for larger breeds. Carefully slip the bag over the dog's head, and ease the front and WARNING! Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can cause nausea and dizziness in humans. THANK YOU Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take HAVE A NICE DAY to deodorize it. back paws through the Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites holes. How To GIVE A DoG CPR Position the dog on her side. The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the dog is on a firm surface. 2 Kneel next to the dog. B Compress the chest. For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate every five compressions with one breath. For medium to large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath. How To GET RiD oF SKUNK ODOR ON YOUR Doc Keep the dog outside. 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water. 4 Check for a hearthbeat. 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry. The compound used to remove skunk odor 4 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin. After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found, continue with compressions. discolor fab- can 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash. Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf- ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need To give artificial respiration, tilt the dog's bead back, place hand around the muzzle, put your mouth over the nose, and breathe into the dog's more. 5 Apply mixture immediately. Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops, then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists. nose. K YO A NICE novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07
however: How TO GIVEA DoG A PIL opyrighted Material
 Sit on the floor in front of your dog.
 Place smaller dogs on your lap.
 How to Clean Dog Poop Off a Shoe
 2 Grasp the dog's head using your nondominant hand.
 Be firm but not harsh. Place your hand on top of the muz-
 zle, with your thumb on one side and fingers on the other.
 3 Raise the dog's nose.
 Squeeze firmly behind the canine or "eye" teeth until the
 jaw opens
 Place the pill between the thumb and forefinger of your
 dominant hand.
 Use the hand's other three fingers to open the lower jaw
 further.
 Use a stick to scrape out poop from
 beneath the tread of your shoe.
 5 Place the pill far back in the dog's mouth.
 Close the mouth.
 Tilt up the chin.
 Keep the mouth closed and stroke the throat to help with
 swallowing.
 BGive the dog a treat.
 BE AWARE!
 Blowing on the nose may stimulate the dog to swallow.
 Hiding the pill in peanut butter or some other treat the dog covets
 is the easiest way to administer a pill However, some canines
 become quite adept at eating the treat and leaving the pill.
 Use your band to keep the
 dog's mouth closed after
 placing the pill in bis mouth.
 Drag sneaker though grass or over edged curb.
 Dip shoe bottom into park fountain
 Page 27

 Dry the dog.
 Emergency Rain Gear
 7 Repeat washing, if necessary.
 This treatment can irritate a dog's skin, so wait at least 48
 hours before bathing a second time.
 Cut or tear holes in
 a plastic shopping
 bag for the dog's
 paws and head. Use a
 kitchen- or yard-sized
 bag for larger breeds.
 Carefully slip the bag
 over the dog's head,
 and ease the front and
 WARNING!
 Skunk spray consists of the ejected contents of the animal's anal
 glands. A freshly sprayed canine can transfer the scent to carpet
 furniture, and anything else he brushes against. The odor can
 cause nausea and dizziness in humans.
 THANK YOU
 Discard the dog's collar or harness. It will spread skunk odor to
 anything it touches and isn't worth the extensive offort it would take
 HAVE A NICE
 DAY
 to deodorize it.
 back paws through the
 Skunks can carry rabies. Examine your pet for bites
 holes.
 How To GIVE A DoG CPR
 Position the dog on her side.
 The back is better for barrel-chested breeds. Make sure the
 dog is on a firm surface.
 2 Kneel next to the dog.
 B Compress the chest.
 For small dogs, place your palm and fingertips over the ribs
 at the point where the elbow meets the chest. Compress the
 chest approximately one inch, twice per second. Alternate
 every five compressions with one breath. For medium to
 large dogs, extend your elbows and cup your hands on top
 of each other. Place hands over the ribs at the point where
 the dog's elbows meet the chest; then compress it two to
 three inches, two times per second. Alternate every five com
 pressions with one breath. For dogs that weigh more than
 100 pounds, compress the chest two or three inches once
 per second, alternating every 10 compressions with a breath.
 How To GET RiD oF SKUNK
 ODOR ON YOUR Doc
 Keep the dog outside.
 2 Flush the dog's eyes with water.
 4 Check for a hearthbeat.
 3 Change your clothes and remove jewelry.
 The compound used to remove skunk odor 4
 ric and, in contact with metals, irritate skin.
 After one minute, listen for a heartbeat. If none is found,
 continue with compressions.
 discolor fab-
 can
 4 Prepare special odor-removing wash.
 Mix 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide with 4 cup of
 baking soda and 1 teaspoon of liquid dish soap. Ingredients
 will bubble furiously when combined. This quantity is suf-
 ficient for a medium-sized dog. A larger canine may need
 To give artificial
 respiration, tilt the dog's
 bead back, place hand
 around the muzzle,
 put your mouth over
 the nose, and breathe
 into the dog's
 more.
 5 Apply mixture immediately.
 Use the odor-removing compound while still foaming, as
 this is when it is most effective. Place dog in bathtub or
 outdoor tub and work mixture into fur, avoiding mouth and
 cyes. Leave for several minutes or until the foaming stops,
 then rinse thoroughly. Reapply if odor persists.
 nose.
 K YO
 A NICE
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook -$5.07

however: Cat's Diary Dog's Diary Day 983 of My Captivity Dog food! My favorite thing! A car ride! My favorite 8:00 am My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre littie dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheiess must eat something in order to keep up my strength. 9:30 am thing! A walk in the park! My 9:40 am favorite thing! 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail My favorite thing! The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today i decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since this clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good litle hunter" I am. Bastards! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe... for now. Dinner! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm 7:00 pm - Got to play balll My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! mini phone dump
however: Cat's Diary
 Dog's Diary
 Day 983 of My Captivity
 Dog food! My favorite thing!
 A car ride! My favorite
 8:00 am
 My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre littie dangling
 objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other
 inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
 Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear,
 I nevertheiess must eat something in order to keep up my
 strength.
 9:30 am
 thing!
 A walk in the park! My
 9:40 am
 favorite thing!
 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My
 favorite thing!
 12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite
 thing!
 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My
 favorite thing!
 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail My favorite
 thing!
 The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In
 an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
 Today i decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at
 their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts,
 since this clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they
 merely made condescending comments about what a "good litle
 hunter" I am. Bastards!
 There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight.
 I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the
 event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I
 overheard that my confinement was due to the power of
 "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to
 my advantage.
 Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one
 of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking.
 I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
 I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
 snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly
 released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is
 obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe
 him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that
 he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective
 custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe... for now.
 Dinner! My favorite thing!
 5:00 pm
 7:00 pm - Got to play balll My favorite
 thing!
 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the
 people! My favorite thing!
 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My
 favorite thing!
mini phone dump

mini phone dump

however: Saving Your Grades From A Mental Health Crisis What To Do Before, During, And After by SmartStudy.tumblr.com IF YOUR GRADES ARE IN IMMEDIATE DANGER CONTACT YOUR TEACHERS This should be the first thing you do when you realise you're in crisis. Email them, and explain your situation in short, professional terms. You do not have to include details about your condition. "I have a mental health condition" should suffice as to the nature of the issue. Tell them that you are going to arrange to see a medical professional as soon as possible, and ask what process you should go through to defer/get an extension on assessment, and if they can help you in any way. Other people you may have to contact or CC in the email (depending on your school): University High School Head of House Class Coordinator Faculty/School Admin Disability Advisor Grade Coordinator Head of Department Academic Admin Counsellor School Counsellor Student Advocate BOOK A DOCTOR/THERAPIST APPOINTMENT ASAP This will be the person who can vouch for you the most. It's best if you have seen them before and they know you. If you can't get an appointment within a few days, call them and email them (if you haven't seen them before this will not work). Make sure to check out what counselling your university or school offers. During this appointment, the priority is to make a plan to get you back on your feet. This effort will not be useful if you stay a mess. Once you've figured that out, get two things from this person. One is a medical certificate/letter stating that you have, in fact, been going through this crisis. Second is a letter that describes the nature of the crisis, what treatment you're going through, and which people to contact (psychiatrists, etc.) who can vouch for this. Note: The reason I say to get two letters is because there is still a huge stigma around mental illness, and you don't want to reveal that you've got a disorder that's highly stigmatised, only to have it come back and bite you in the ass later. Don't provide details unless it's necessary or asked for. A STUDENT KNOW YOUR RIGHTS AS Most schools and institutions will have a list of a student's rights and responsibilities online. Look them up. Know what your rights are as a student. Also look to see if there are state/national laws protecting you, or if your school is a part of a network of schools that has its own code. Some people working in schools still think mental health issues are trivial, and you never know when they're going to ignore a rule to suit themselves. Make sure you can pick on this if it happens to you. Pretty much all schools will have protection in place for students with mental illnesses and disabilities, so even if you a miss a deadline for a form or make another mistake, they should take your exceptional circumstances into account. This is where a student or disability advisor from school can help you. ottom IF YOU HAVEN'T REACHED CRISIS YET TALK TO A DOCTOR/THERAPIST/COUNSELLOR/TRUSTED ADULT If you're going through a hard time, talk to someone who can help you. Any trusted adult or professional can help you get back on your feet before it's too late, or refer you to someone who can. If it's a new issue, you'll have to see someone like a GP who can refer you to a therapist or mental health service. Talk to them about what's been happening, and say that you need help. Sometimes, even talking about the problem can help you feel better. In these situations, they can also help you figure out what you can do at school to catch up/get special help. FIGURE OUT HOW TO STUDY WHILE IN A BAD STATE Even if you're getting help, it might be some time before you're fully back on track. In these instances, try to make the best of a bad situation. Can't leave the house? Access lecture recordings and eBooks. Ask your friends to send you their notes, or ask the teacher if you can submit your homework via email, or through a friend. Have trouble concentrating? Figure out how long you can study without needing a break, and make a schedule around that. Always make sure to ask your teachers if they can help you with this. Whether it be slightly changing the requirements or conditions of a piece of assessment, or simply their understanding that you may not be able to attend perfectly, it can make a big difference with your overall marks. If they don't know you're struggling, they can't help! DON'T PUSH YOURSELF OR OVERTHINK When you realise there's an issue, it's easy to fall into panic or try to power through. Don't do this. It'll just make you more stressed and aggravate the existing problems, which will make things much worse in the long run. Though it's hard to believe sometimes, your health and mental health are more important than your grades. You can't ignore your mind when it's screaming at you that something is wrong. Listen to it, and be easy on yourself. The best way to get back to your full potential to ask for help and give yourself what you need. Take a break when you need one and practise self-care. It's more important than you might things. RECOVERING FROM A BREAKDOWN ACCEPT THAT YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH SOMETHING MAJOR Once the worst has passed, some people try to brush it off and pretend it never happened. They can feel ashamed or embarrassed about what they went through. However, there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about, especially if you had a pre-existing mental health condition. Every life has ups and downs and just because yours were a bit more serious than some people's, it doesn't mean that you're weak somehow. The best thing you can do for yourself is to recognise what happened, and work to prevent it from happening again by setting up crisis plans and support networks. GET TUTORING TO CATCH UP If you've fallen behind, don't worry. There are plenty of ways to catch yourself up and get back on track. The best way is to hire a tutor. They can guide you through the work, help you understand difficult concepts, and identify the places you need more help. Yes, tutors can be expensive, but there's a way to get around this. See if there is anyone who took your class the year before who might be willing to tutor you for an hour each week for a discounted prince. Similarly, see if there are any students who can help you in exchange for something like instrument lessons. And if any of your friends are academically gifted, I'm sure they'd be able to help. If all else fails, go to office hours and any free tutoring sessions your school or university offers. Do some research, ask around, see what's there. PACE YOURSELF AND DON'T RUSH IN After a breakdown or crisis, you may be tempted to throw yourself back into your work to catch up. Don't! You'll become overwhelmed and end up back at square one. Remember, you've just been through a very difficult situation and you're not going to get better overnight. Ease yourself in. I definitely recommend starting with a reduced or part-time study load if possible. Remember that you may not be back at your full capacity just yet, and difficulties concentrating and being motivated could make things hard. By starting off slowly, you're able to get used to studying again without too much pressure. DEVELOP A ROUTINE Yes, this advice is in every piece of study advice ever, but you shouldn't develop just any routine. Develop one that allows you plenty of breaks and takes into consider any issues you may have with fatigue or focusing. If your breakdown was caused by overwork, make sure this one is easier on you. Things to include you could include in a healthy routine (but don't micromanage!): "I feel crap" time* Breaks and meals Plenty of sleep and rest "You" time (treat yo self) Time to plan for the next week Exercise (have you tried yoga? Kidding) Meditation/mindfulness Friend/family social time * Remember that the thoughts and feelings caused by mental illness are not shameful, and ignoring and forcing them down will only make them worse. If you need to lie in bed feeling miserable, do it. THINGS TO REMEMBER DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS It can be easy to look at other people and see your own flaws, but it's important to try not to. Every person has different experiences and struggles, so it's not fair to yourself to look at someone without yours and think you're behind in some way. Taking longer to complete your studies isn't shameful. Making mistakes isn't shameful. Needing breaks isn't shameful. You'll get where you need to be in the end. Have patience. GRADES DON'T DEFINE YOU I spent so much of my life thinking my only worth came from my academic success. And guess what? This just led to more anxiety and depression. It's important to realise that things like grades, class rankings, GPAS, and "intelligence" aren't that important. Who you are and what you do is far more important than these arbitrary labels. THERE IS A STIGMA, SO BE PREPARED It's an unfortunate reality, but there is still a stigma against mental health issues and there is a chance it might affect your experiences while dealing with administrative staff and teachers. There have been stories about people telling their people supposed to be guiding them that they have mental health issues, and being dismissed because "it's a girl issue" or "it's all in their head". Be prepared in case this happens to you. Remind people that it's a medical condition and that you can get proof from medical professionals if need be. Plus, there is probably something in your school's policies or even the law that protects you when you have a mental illness. Remember that just because people are ignorant, that doesn't mean your issue is not 100% real and important. Don't let these people make you feel worse. YOU CAN DO THIS In our darkest moments, it can be hard to believe that we're capable of immense strength, but I promise you we are. Whatever obstacle is in your path right now - even if it's your brain chemistry - you are going to get through this. You've made it through every worst day you've had so far. You've made it through the dark and scary moments, and you've come out the other end stronger and wiser. Remember that you are strong, and even when you don't feel like it, there is always support available to help you realise that strength again. tmblimteom apricot-studies: smartstudy: Hey guys. I’m glad to be finally posting my “mental breakdown survival guide”. As you know I struggle a lot with mental health, and so I have been through a lot of breakdowns. So many that I actually dropped out of university after 3 weeks in 2016 and had to take the whole year off. Because of this, I’ve made it my mission to help others with mental health issues as much as I can, so you don’t have to go through what I’ve been through. Anyway, here is my guide. I tried to keep it general, and actually useful. If you have any questions or additions please feel free to add them. And as ever, if you want to talk to me about studying with mental illness or want to see a post on a specific topic, please feel free to message me. thank you so much for this
however: Saving Your Grades From
 A Mental Health Crisis
 What To Do Before, During, And After
 by SmartStudy.tumblr.com

 IF YOUR GRADES ARE IN IMMEDIATE DANGER
 CONTACT YOUR TEACHERS
 This should be the first thing you do when you realise you're in crisis. Email them, and explain your
 situation in short, professional terms. You do not have to include details about your condition. "I have
 a mental health condition" should suffice as to the nature of the issue.
 Tell them that you are going to arrange to see a medical professional as soon as possible, and ask what
 process you should go through to defer/get an extension on assessment, and if they can help you in
 any way.
 Other people you may have to contact or CC in the email (depending on your school):
 University
 High School
 Head of House
 Class Coordinator
 Faculty/School Admin
 Disability Advisor
 Grade Coordinator
 Head of Department
 Academic Admin
 Counsellor
 School Counsellor
 Student Advocate
 BOOK A DOCTOR/THERAPIST APPOINTMENT ASAP
 This will be the person who can vouch for you the most. It's best if you have seen them before and
 they know you. If you can't get an appointment within a few days, call them and email them (if you
 haven't seen them before this will not work). Make sure to check out what counselling your university
 or school offers.
 During this appointment, the priority is to make a plan to get you back on your feet. This effort will
 not be useful if you stay a mess. Once you've figured that out, get two things from this person. One is
 a medical certificate/letter stating that you have, in fact, been going through this crisis. Second is a
 letter that describes the nature of the crisis, what treatment you're going through, and which people
 to contact (psychiatrists, etc.) who can vouch for this.
 Note: The reason I say to get two letters is because there is still a huge stigma around mental illness,
 and you don't want to reveal that you've got a disorder that's highly stigmatised, only to have it come
 back and bite you in the ass later. Don't provide details unless it's necessary or asked for.
 A STUDENT
 KNOW YOUR RIGHTS AS
 Most schools and institutions will have a list of a student's rights and responsibilities online. Look them
 up. Know what your rights are as a student. Also look to see if there are state/national laws protecting
 you, or if your school is a part of a network of schools that has its own code. Some people working in
 schools still think mental health issues are trivial, and you never know when they're going to ignore a
 rule to suit themselves. Make sure you can pick on this if it happens to you.
 Pretty much all schools will have protection in place for students with mental illnesses and disabilities,
 so even if you a miss a deadline for a form or make another mistake, they should take your exceptional
 circumstances into account. This is where a student or disability advisor from school can help you.
 ottom

 IF YOU HAVEN'T REACHED CRISIS YET
 TALK TO A DOCTOR/THERAPIST/COUNSELLOR/TRUSTED ADULT
 If you're going through a hard time, talk to someone who can help you. Any trusted adult or
 professional can help you get back on your feet before it's too late, or refer you to someone who can.
 If it's a new issue, you'll have to see someone like a GP who can refer you to a therapist or mental
 health service.
 Talk to them about what's been happening, and say that you need help. Sometimes, even talking
 about the problem can help you feel better. In these situations, they can also help you figure out what
 you can do at school to catch up/get special help.
 FIGURE OUT HOW TO STUDY WHILE IN A BAD STATE
 Even if you're getting help, it might be some time before you're fully back on track. In these instances,
 try to make the best of a bad situation.
 Can't leave the house? Access lecture recordings and eBooks. Ask your friends to send you their notes,
 or ask the teacher if you can submit your homework via email, or through a friend. Have trouble
 concentrating? Figure out how long you can study without needing a break, and make a schedule
 around that.
 Always make sure to ask your teachers if they can help you with this. Whether it be slightly changing
 the requirements or conditions of a piece of assessment, or simply their understanding that you may
 not be able to attend perfectly, it can make a big difference with your overall marks. If they don't know
 you're struggling, they can't help!
 DON'T PUSH YOURSELF OR OVERTHINK
 When you realise there's an issue, it's easy to fall into panic or try to power through. Don't do this. It'll
 just make you more stressed and aggravate the existing problems, which will make things much worse
 in the long run.
 Though it's hard to believe sometimes, your health and mental health are more important than your
 grades. You can't ignore your mind when it's screaming at you that something is wrong. Listen to it,
 and be easy on yourself.
 The best way to get back to your full potential to ask for help and give yourself what you need. Take a
 break when you need one and practise self-care. It's more important than you might things.

 RECOVERING FROM A BREAKDOWN
 ACCEPT THAT YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH SOMETHING MAJOR
 Once the worst has passed, some people try to brush it off and pretend it never happened. They can
 feel ashamed or embarrassed about what they went through. However, there is absolutely nothing to
 be ashamed or embarrassed about, especially if you had a pre-existing mental health condition. Every
 life has ups and downs and just because yours were a bit more serious than some people's, it doesn't
 mean that you're weak somehow.
 The best thing you can do for yourself is to recognise what happened, and work to prevent it from
 happening again by setting up crisis plans and support networks.
 GET TUTORING TO CATCH UP
 If you've fallen behind, don't worry. There are plenty of ways to catch yourself up and get back on
 track. The best way is to hire a tutor. They can guide you through the work, help you understand
 difficult concepts, and identify the places you need more help.
 Yes, tutors can be expensive, but there's a way to get around this. See if there is anyone who took
 your class the year before who might be willing to tutor you for an hour each week for a discounted
 prince. Similarly, see if there are any students who can help you in exchange for something like
 instrument lessons. And if any of your friends are academically gifted, I'm sure they'd be able to help.
 If all else fails, go to office hours and any free tutoring sessions your school or university offers. Do
 some research, ask around, see what's there.
 PACE YOURSELF AND DON'T RUSH IN
 After a breakdown or crisis, you may be tempted to throw yourself back into your work to catch up.
 Don't! You'll become overwhelmed and end up back at square one. Remember, you've just been
 through a very difficult situation and you're not going to get better overnight.
 Ease yourself in. I definitely recommend starting with a reduced or part-time study load if possible.
 Remember that you may not be back at your full capacity just yet, and difficulties concentrating and
 being motivated could make things hard. By starting off slowly, you're able to get used to studying
 again without too much pressure.
 DEVELOP A ROUTINE
 Yes, this advice is in every piece of study advice ever, but you shouldn't develop just any routine.
 Develop one that allows you plenty of breaks and takes into consider any issues you may have with
 fatigue or focusing. If your breakdown was caused by overwork, make sure this one is easier on you.
 Things to include you could include in a healthy routine (but don't micromanage!):
 "I feel crap" time*
 Breaks and meals
 Plenty of sleep and rest
 "You" time (treat yo self)
 Time to plan for the next week
 Exercise (have you tried yoga? Kidding)
 Meditation/mindfulness
 Friend/family social time
 * Remember that the thoughts and feelings caused by mental illness are not shameful, and ignoring
 and forcing them down will only make them worse. If you need to lie in bed feeling miserable, do it.

 THINGS TO REMEMBER
 DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS
 It can be easy to look at other people and see your own flaws, but it's important to try not to. Every
 person has different experiences and struggles, so it's not fair to yourself to look at someone without
 yours and think you're behind in some way.
 Taking longer to complete your studies isn't shameful. Making mistakes isn't shameful. Needing
 breaks isn't shameful. You'll get where you need to be in the end. Have patience.
 GRADES DON'T DEFINE YOU
 I spent so much of my life thinking my only worth came from my academic success. And guess what?
 This just led to more anxiety and depression. It's important to realise that things like grades, class
 rankings, GPAS, and "intelligence" aren't that important. Who you are and what you do is far more
 important than these arbitrary labels.
 THERE IS A STIGMA, SO BE PREPARED
 It's an unfortunate reality, but there is still a stigma against mental health issues and there is a chance
 it might affect your experiences while dealing with administrative staff and teachers. There have been
 stories about people telling their people supposed to be guiding them that they have mental health
 issues, and being dismissed because "it's a girl issue" or "it's all in their head".
 Be prepared in case this happens to you. Remind people that it's a medical condition and that you can
 get proof from medical professionals if need be. Plus, there is probably something in your school's
 policies or even the law that protects you when you have a mental illness.
 Remember that just because people are ignorant, that doesn't mean your issue is not 100% real and
 important. Don't let these people make you feel worse.
 YOU CAN DO THIS
 In our darkest moments, it can be hard to believe that we're capable of immense strength, but I
 promise you we are. Whatever obstacle is in your path right now - even if it's your brain chemistry -
 you are going to get through this.
 You've made it through every worst day you've had so far. You've made it through the dark and scary
 moments, and you've come out the other end stronger and wiser.
 Remember that you are strong, and even when you don't feel like it, there is always support available
 to help you realise that strength again.
 tmblimteom
apricot-studies:
smartstudy:

Hey guys. I’m glad to be finally posting my “mental breakdown survival guide”. As you know I struggle a lot with mental health, and so I have been through a lot of breakdowns. So many that I actually dropped out of university after 3 weeks in 2016 and had to take the whole year off. Because of this, I’ve made it my mission to help others with mental health issues as much as I can, so you don’t have to go through what I’ve been through.
Anyway, here is my guide. I tried to keep it general, and actually useful. If you have any questions or additions please feel free to add them. 
And as ever, if you want to talk to me about studying with mental illness or want to see a post on a specific topic, please feel free to message me. 

thank you so much for this

apricot-studies: smartstudy: Hey guys. I’m glad to be finally posting my “mental breakdown survival guide”. As you know I struggle a lot...

however: Sairam Gudiseva 3nd period Never has a man influenced physics so profoundly as Niels Bohr in the early 1900's. Going back to this time period, little was known about atomic structure; Bohr set out to end the obscurity of physics. However,things didn't come easy for Bohr. He had to give up most of his life for physics and research of many hypothesis. But, this is why you and I have even heard of the quantum theory and atomic structures. Bohr came up with his quantum theory while studying at Cambridge. Bohr was a skeptic and he never truly believed in Max Planck's old quantum theory. He put forth the idea that, going from one high-energy orbit o a lower one, an electron could, in fact, be trying to emit a quantum of discrete energy. Bohr was criticized for this idea, but he didn't let up. Soon after, Bohr said his famed quote, " If quantum mechanics hasn't shocked you, you haven't understood it yet." This quote is extremely famous and has gone down as the motto for quantum physicist around the world. Understandably, Bohr never won a Nobel prize outside of physics (of which he only won one). Bohr's still going strong with his theories on atomic structure; he allowed for 100's of scientists to fully experiment with the cell and its many components. Bohr was largely on the run from the Nazi's when he came up with this discovery, which is amazing because around this time, Bohr's home country of Denmark was invaded by the Nazi's. Bohr and Ernest Rutherford are given credit, but it is believed that Rutherford decided to desert Bohr in the middle of their work. Rutherford once, quite famously said that you should never bet against the wonders of science. Niels Bohr's famous career never really kicked off until he was forty years old. Most other major scientists were going all over the world with their ideas by their early twenties. However, in order to preserve the legacy of Niels Bohr, he has his own institution, whose goal is to make many more great strides in the field of physics for years. How did Bohr affect you and me? Without Niels Bohrs' more advanced atomic theory, we might as well cry over how little we know of the atoms and their compounds. Physics would have never been such a force in the todays society. However, to this day, research is still going on to improve and update the atomic theory. Although scientists clearly want to improve on Bohr's theory, many famous physicists come out publicly and openly say that Bohr's ideas will never be improved upon, todays society cannot say goodbye to an opportunity to improve our understanding of the sciences. If Bohr never had silenced his critics, we would still be following Planck's theories, and going on incomplete information. Bohr's later life was all occupied when he decided to go back to Denmark and head the Royal Danish Academy. His main goal was to tell the world of the of the greatness of the Danish Sciences and most likely educate a new crop of scientists for years to come. There is controversy surrounding Bohr's lie during his stint in the Manhattan project. Though he claimed to be anti-violence and a peace-seeker, Bohr engineered on the Manhattan Project. Though he didn't hurt anyone directly, thousands of people died. Neils Bohr opened many doors for you and I in the physics world, he will go down as one of the greatest physicists. This guy aces quantum mechanics by EagleIndustriesJP MORE MEMES
however: Sairam Gudiseva
 3nd period
 Never has a man influenced physics so profoundly as Niels Bohr in the early 1900's.
 Going back to this time period, little was known about atomic structure; Bohr set out
 to end the obscurity of physics. However,things didn't come easy for Bohr. He had to
 give up most of his life for physics and research of many hypothesis. But, this is why
 you and I have even heard of the quantum theory and atomic structures. Bohr came
 up with his quantum theory while studying at Cambridge. Bohr was a skeptic and he
 never truly believed in Max Planck's old quantum theory. He put forth the idea that,
 going from one high-energy orbit o a lower one, an electron could, in fact, be trying
 to emit a quantum of discrete energy. Bohr was criticized for this idea, but he didn't
 let up. Soon after, Bohr said his famed quote, " If quantum mechanics hasn't shocked
 you, you haven't understood it yet." This quote is extremely famous and has gone
 down as the motto for quantum physicist around the world. Understandably, Bohr
 never won a Nobel prize outside of physics (of which he only won one). Bohr's still
 going strong with his theories on atomic structure; he allowed for 100's of scientists
 to fully experiment with the cell and its many components. Bohr was largely on the
 run from the Nazi's when he came up with this discovery, which is amazing because
 around this time, Bohr's home country of Denmark was invaded by the Nazi's. Bohr
 and Ernest Rutherford are given credit, but it is believed that Rutherford decided to
 desert Bohr in the middle of their work. Rutherford once, quite famously said that
 you should never bet against the wonders of science. Niels Bohr's famous career
 never really kicked off until he was forty years old. Most other major scientists were
 going all over the world with their ideas by their early twenties. However, in order
 to preserve the legacy of Niels Bohr, he has his own institution, whose goal is to
 make many more great strides in the field of physics for years. How did Bohr affect
 you and me? Without Niels Bohrs' more advanced atomic theory, we might as well
 cry over how little we know of the atoms and their compounds. Physics would have
 never been such a force in the todays society. However, to this day, research is still
 going on to improve and update the atomic theory. Although scientists clearly want
 to improve on Bohr's theory, many famous physicists come out publicly and openly
 say that Bohr's ideas will never be improved upon, todays society cannot say
 goodbye to an opportunity to improve our understanding of the sciences. If Bohr
 never had silenced his critics, we would still be following Planck's theories, and
 going on incomplete information. Bohr's later life was all occupied when he decided
 to go back to Denmark and head the Royal Danish Academy. His main goal was to
 tell the world of the of the greatness of the Danish Sciences and most likely educate
 a new crop of scientists for years to come. There is controversy surrounding Bohr's
 lie during his stint in the Manhattan project. Though he claimed to be anti-violence
 and a peace-seeker, Bohr engineered on the Manhattan Project. Though he didn't
 hurt anyone directly, thousands of people died. Neils Bohr opened many doors for
 you and I in the physics world, he will go down as one of the greatest physicists.
This guy aces quantum mechanics by EagleIndustriesJP
MORE MEMES

This guy aces quantum mechanics by EagleIndustriesJP MORE MEMES

however: Karen Green Target 57 minutes ago I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the Lord!!! Like Comment Angela Concepcion about an hour ago Target I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere. Like Comment Chet Stanger Target 3 hours ago With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it. Les Powell 3 hours ago X Target Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more when my friends see this... ADVERTISEMENT that's love BE YOURSELF TOGETHER. whatdoyoumeanihavetochoose: thetrashmouthclub: somethingmissingthiswaycomes: vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays: astrolope: People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook. I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story. A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right? It is a big deal because i’m a transman.  It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview. Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews. At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple. At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person. TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life. people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there Looks like I’m going to target. Real men shop at target All corporations are bad but now I’m considering applying to Target. “when you can give equal respects for all of your costumers, then maybe many of us will be back” ma'am………. that’s exactly what they’re doing At target you can order a special name tag from HR with your pronouns on it! Officially printed on there and everything!!!!! Target just got +1000000 respect
however: Karen Green Target
 57 minutes ago
 I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at
 your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the
 Lord!!!
 Like Comment

 Angela Concepcion
 about an hour ago
 Target
 I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I
 have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a
 Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash
 her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not
 allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not
 carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will
 encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give
 equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us
 will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere.
 Like Comment

 Chet Stanger Target
 3 hours ago
 With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've
 lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to
 such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it.

 Les Powell
 3 hours ago
 X
 Target
 Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more
 when my friends see this...
 ADVERTISEMENT
 that's love
 BE YOURSELF
 TOGETHER.
whatdoyoumeanihavetochoose:

thetrashmouthclub:
somethingmissingthiswaycomes:

vision-rights:

subject-to-my-fandoms:

tehrogue:

norsegays:

astrolope:

People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook.

I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story.
A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right?
It is a big deal because i’m a transman. 
It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview.
Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews.
At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple.
At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person.
TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life.

people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there


Looks like I’m going to target. 


Real men shop at target


All corporations are bad but now I’m considering applying to Target. 


“when you can give equal respects for all of your costumers, then maybe many of us will be back” ma'am………. that’s exactly what they’re doing


At target you can order a special name tag from HR with your pronouns on it! Officially printed on there and everything!!!!!

Target just got +1000000 respect

whatdoyoumeanihavetochoose: thetrashmouthclub: somethingmissingthiswaycomes: vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsega...

however: did you know? When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky at an animal rescue in Mississippi. He soon left town to visit family, but when he finally returned, she danced on his arm, put her head on his shoulder, and hugged him with her wings. PHOTO: FACEBOOK, WILD AT HEART RES CUE DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM wingedpredators: birds-and-pizza: talons-mcbeak: did-you-kno: When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky at an animal rescue in Mississippi. When Doug was growing up, a great horned owl used to perch on the top of his family barn. His father saw the owl often, but he and the rest of his family rarely did. However, on the morning of his father’s death, the owl was spotted overlooking the farm house, where Pojeky’s father had passed away, before flying off into the woods. “For some reason when that bird was hugging me, all I could think of was my dad.” Source Source 2 no no no no no this owl is not a happy owl this owl is an injured, weak owl with a head injury this owl is not displaying appropriate owl behaviors and is ill-equipped for life as a wild owl. this owl should be trying to escape and/or murder this man because that is just what owls do, especially great horned owls apparently this owl got released which really alarmed me because either she made a miraculous recovery or she was completely not in any way ready for release and doesn’t have great chances of survival believe me, i wish owls were all cuddly sweethearts who gave hugs and appreciated our care but that is so very much not reality. even the sweetest owl i know - who is the light of my life and a joy to work with - likes to murder stuff and will hiss and threaten you if he doesn’t trust you or wants you to gtfo. and when i say “sweetest owl” basically i just mean that he’s bonded to his two main trainers and is comfortable with us but if you ask anyone else he’s a grouchy old man with sharp talons. because he’s an owl. he’s not a snuggly pet. and he’s a 14-year-old captive-bred barn owl who has lived with humans and been an education bird his whole life, not a wild great horned owl who is clearly injured and having a shitty week of being grabbed and handled by giant mammals. this great horned owl is not a happy owl and it certainly isn’t feeling any sort of gratitude. mostly she’s too sick/injured to have enough energy to defend herself or hold her wings up or keep her eyes open. when wild animals get released it’s nice to think that they are silently thanking us for saving them, but that’s what we don’t want. we want them to be ready for life in the wild, which means we want them to hate us and want to avoid humans forever, because that gives them the best chance of survival. the best thanks you can get from a rehabilitated wild animal is when they fly/run/swim the fuck away from you as soon as you open the cage and never look back. those are the successes. I can preach what @talons-mcbeak said This owl obviously is not aware of anything that is going on and is showing signs of a very very serious head injury (trust me, I’ve seen my fair share). You can see in the gif she attempted to bite him. She is just too weak and sick to be able to stop this person from manhandling her. This man is not handling this bird right at all, and wild great horned owls are never friendly. That owl should not be put into those positions or used to promote such a disgusting lie by a man who obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing. It is a wild animal not a domestic. Do not believe this bullshit story! This! This 100 times over! UGH. I keep seeing this owl picture and story passed around on Facebook, Tumblr, etc. with captions of ‘awwwww’ and ‘Cute!’ and so forth. No. It’s not ‘cute’. That owl is so unfit to be released and weak and probably in high states of stress. Anyone who knows the slightest thing about owl behaviour knows that this is not a ‘thankful’ or ‘happy animal’. Owls can’t even feel any love-related emotions to humans. Period. Please share the truth about this story. The above two comments say a lot. :/ Shame on that ‘rehabber’ for passing on such false information and for treating that poor injured owl in such a way.
however: did you know?
 When GiGi the horned owl sustained
 a near-fatal head injury, she was
 nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky
 at an animal rescue in Mississippi. He
 soon left town to visit family, but when
 he finally returned, she danced on his
 arm, put her head on his shoulder, and
 hugged him with her wings.
 PHOTO: FACEBOOK, WILD AT HEART RES CUE
 DIDYOUKNOWBLOG.COM
wingedpredators:
birds-and-pizza:

talons-mcbeak:

did-you-kno:

When GiGi the horned owl sustained 
a near-fatal head injury, she was 
nursed back to health by Doug Pojeky 
at an animal rescue in Mississippi.
When Doug was growing up, a great horned owl used to perch on the top of his family barn. His father saw the owl often, but he and the rest of his family rarely did. However, on the morning of his father’s death, the owl was spotted overlooking the farm house, where Pojeky’s father had passed away, before flying off into the woods.
“For some reason when that bird was hugging me, all I could think of was my dad.”
Source Source 2

no no no no no
this owl is not a happy owl
this owl is an injured, weak owl with a head injury
this owl is not displaying appropriate owl behaviors and is ill-equipped for life as a wild owl. this owl should be trying to escape and/or murder this man because that is just what owls do, especially great horned owls
apparently this owl got released which really alarmed me because either she made a miraculous recovery or she was completely not in any way ready for release and doesn’t have great chances of survival
believe me, i wish owls were all cuddly sweethearts who gave hugs and appreciated our care but that is so very much not reality. even the sweetest owl i know - who is the light of my life and a joy to work with - likes to murder stuff and will hiss and threaten you if he doesn’t trust you or wants you to gtfo. and when i say “sweetest owl” basically i just mean that he’s bonded to his two main trainers and is comfortable with us but if you ask anyone else he’s a grouchy old man with sharp talons. because he’s an owl. he’s not a snuggly pet. and he’s a 14-year-old captive-bred barn owl who has lived with humans and been an education bird his whole life, not a wild great horned owl who is clearly injured and having a shitty week of being grabbed and handled by giant mammals. this great horned owl is not a happy owl and it certainly isn’t feeling any sort of gratitude. mostly she’s too sick/injured to have enough energy to defend herself or hold her wings up or keep her eyes open.
when wild animals get released it’s nice to think that they are silently thanking us for saving them, but that’s what we don’t want. we want them to be ready for life in the wild, which means we want them to hate us and want to avoid humans forever, because that gives them the best chance of survival. the best thanks you can get from a rehabilitated wild animal is when they fly/run/swim the fuck away from you as soon as you open the cage and never look back. those are the successes.

I can preach what @talons-mcbeak said

This owl obviously is not aware of anything that is going on and is showing signs of a very very serious head injury (trust me, I’ve seen my fair share). You can see in the gif she attempted to bite him. She is just too weak and sick to be able to stop this person from manhandling her.

This man is not handling this bird right at all, and wild great horned owls are never friendly. 
That owl should not be put into those positions or used to promote such a disgusting lie by a man who obviously doesn’t know what he’s doing.

It is a wild animal not a domestic. Do not believe this bullshit story!


This!
This 100 times over!
UGH.
I keep seeing this owl picture and story passed around on Facebook, Tumblr, etc. with captions of ‘awwwww’ and ‘Cute!’ and so forth.
No.
It’s not ‘cute’. 
That owl is so unfit to be released and weak and probably in high states of stress. Anyone who knows the slightest thing about owl behaviour knows that this is not a ‘thankful’ or ‘happy animal’. Owls can’t even feel any love-related emotions to humans. Period.
Please share the truth about this story. The above two comments say a lot. :/
Shame on that ‘rehabber’ for passing on such false information and for treating that poor injured owl in such a way.

wingedpredators: birds-and-pizza: talons-mcbeak: did-you-kno: When GiGi the horned owl sustained a near-fatal head injury, she was n...

however: Karen Green Target 57 minutes ago I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the Lord!!! Like Comment Angela Concepcion about an hour ago Target I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere. Like Comment Chet Stanger Target 3 hours ago With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it. Les Powell 3 hours ago X Target Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more when my friends see this... ADVERTISEMENT that's love BE YOURSELF TOGETHER. vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays: astrolope: People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook. I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story. A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right? It is a big deal because i’m a transman.  It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview. Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews. At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple. At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person. TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life. people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there Looks like I’m going to target. Real men shop at target
however: Karen Green Target
 57 minutes ago
 I just saw your ad and I will never be able to spend money at
 your store again!! One man, one woman for life, thus saith the
 Lord!!!
 Like Comment

 Angela Concepcion
 about an hour ago
 Target
 I just saw your ad for gay couples marrying to register with you. I
 have also experienced an extraordinary wait in line when a
 Muslim cashier would not handle pork and someone had to cash
 her out, cash in and resume the order. However, you will not
 allow your customers to say Merry Christmas and you do not
 carry nativity creches. I will never shop in Target again and I will
 encourage friends and family to do the same. When you can give
 equal respects to all of your customers, then maybe many of us
 will be back. Till then, I will spend my money elsewhere.
 Like Comment

 Chet Stanger Target
 3 hours ago
 With your advertisement for homosexual bridal registry, you've
 lost a card carrying shopper. It's one thing to expose adults to
 such debauchery, but it's quite another to expose children to it.

 Les Powell
 3 hours ago
 X
 Target
 Well Target you lost all my business and I am sure alot more
 when my friends see this...
 ADVERTISEMENT
 that's love
 BE YOURSELF
 TOGETHER.
vision-rights:
subject-to-my-fandoms:

tehrogue:

norsegays:

astrolope:

People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook.

I just want to give my two cents on this and tell you a story.
A couple weeks ago, I was hired at Target. I have a job at Target. Not a big deal right?
It is a big deal because i’m a transman. 
It doesn’t take a genius to conclude that it’s hard for me, my brothers, and sisters to get a job. There are legal restraints regarding the job and if you don’t pass, it’s hard to be taken seriously at a job interview.
Right on the application, it asks what your preferred name is. It also asks if there is anything that target should know. I put the fact that I am a transman, expecting not to get a call because usually when you put that down, people will throw out the application. I got TWO interviews.
At the interview, they asked me about it. I told them I am on hormones and they told me that they didn’t care. Not in the sense that they don’t emotionally care, but that it didn’t matter. I was male and that’s all that mattered. They also told me that they give sex same couples benefits in states that do not recognize them as a married couple.
At my job orientation, I was not misgendered once. Even my supervisors who weren’t sure of my gender avoided pronoun use, which I found only happens when you’ve had pronoun training. They gave me a name tag with my preferred name and didn’t ask questions. I felt safe and respected, which is huge for a trans* person.
TLDR: Target is amazing not just for the LGB, but also the T. Shop there for the rest of your life.

people didnt know how Pro-LGBT Target is. I will always shop there


Looks like I’m going to target. 


Real men shop at target

vision-rights: subject-to-my-fandoms: tehrogue: norsegays: astrolope: People being angry about ~dem gays~ on Target’s Facebook. I ju...

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes HOW TO TREAT A TONGUE STUCK TO A POLE lWarm the pole with your hands. Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is very when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding. Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several minutes cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze 1 Do not panic. 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole 3 Move closer to the pole. Pulling sharply will be very painful. As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will quickly heal. | İlke z test pull. Get as close as possible without letting more of the tongue's surface area touch the pole. Alternative Method 0 se warm water Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may freeze and exacerbate the problem. Be Aware Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the small amount you will be able to generate is likely to freeze on your tongue.. If another person is present, have him or her pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over your tongue should do the trick Warm the pole wih yr ui wti your ton How To THWART AN AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT er all ood/ medi 1S tial restau tuate fave hark an- e to nc- to How rO ESCAPE FROM A GIANT OCTOPUS 1 Pull away quickly In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres- sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the next step. 2 Do not go limp. Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough, will check to see if you are a food item before letting you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult. However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres- sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring ou in for a closer look. 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around your arms. The COMPLETE WORST-CASE SCENARIO Survival Handbook Includes Searchable CD With All 11 Handbooks plus wallpapers, and more By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes

 HOW TO TREAT A
 TONGUE STUCK
 TO A POLE
 lWarm the pole with your hands.
 Atongue will stick when the surface of the pole is
 very
 when the tongue touches the pole, causing bonding.
 Place your gloved hands on the area of the pole
 closest to the tongue. Hold them there for several
 minutes
 cold. The top few layers of the tongue will freeze
 1 Do not panic.
 2 Do not pull the tongue from the pole
 3 Move closer to the pole.
 Pulling sharply will be very painful.
 As the pole warms, the frozen area around the tongue
 should begin to thaw. Gently pull the tongue away
 from the pole. You may leave a layer or two of skin on
 the pole, which will be painful, but the tongue will
 quickly heal.
 | İlke z test pull.
 Get as close as possible without letting more of the
 tongue's surface area touch the pole.
 Alternative Method
 0
 se warm water
 Pour water from a water bottle over the tongue and
 the pole. Do not use water that is cold, or it may
 freeze and exacerbate the problem.
 Be Aware
 Do not try to loosen your tongue with your own
 saliva: Although saliva is relatively warm, the
 small amount you will be able to generate is
 likely to freeze on your tongue..
 If another person is present, have him or her
 pour warm (not hot) water over your tongue. This
 may be difficult to articulate while your tongue is
 stuck-pantomiming a glass of water poured over
 your tongue should do the trick
 Warm the pole wih yr ui wti
 your ton

 How To THWART AN
 AFFECTIONATE COSTUMED MAScoT
 er
 all
 ood/
 medi
 1S
 tial
 restau
 tuate
 fave
 hark
 an-
 e
 to
 nc-
 to

 How rO ESCAPE
 FROM A GIANT
 OCTOPUS
 1 Pull away quickly
 In many cases, a human can escape from the grasp of
 small- to medium-sized octopus by just swimming
 away. Propel yourself forward to create a pulling pres-
 sure on the octopus's arms. If you cannot get away, or
 if you feel yourself being pulled back, continue to the
 next step.
 2 Do not go limp.
 Octopi are naturally curious and, if strong enough,
 will check to see if you are a food item before letting
 you go. Do not act passively, or you may be bitten or
 quickly enveloped by the octopus's web, a flexible
 sheath used to trap prey. Once you are caught in a
 "web-over," escape will be extremely difficult.
 However, octopi tire easily, so continue to put pres-
 sure on the arms by attempting to swim away. The
 octopus may decide to let you go rather than bring
 ou in for a closer look.
 3 Prevent the octopus's arms from wrapping around
 your arms.

 The
 COMPLETE
 WORST-CASE SCENARIO
 Survival Handbook
 Includes
 Searchable CD
 With All
 11 Handbooks
 plus wallpapers,
 and more
 By Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht
novelty-gift-ideas:

Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

however: Copyrighted Material ALLIGATORS How To WRESTLE FREE FROM AN ALLIGATOR If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put downward pressure on its neck. This will force its head and jaws down. 2 Cover the alligator's eyes. This will usually make it more sedate. 5 feet 10 fet 15 feet 20 feet 3 Go for the eyes and nose. If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist. 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout. Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly. They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and back off. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator. How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT NEAR AN ALLIGATOR If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual actions cause severe tissue damage. Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does not begin shaking. Determine the size of the alligator. Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet should be considered deadly. cut or bruise, to treat infection. Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object. The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator. Try to determine if the alligator sees the object. Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food. 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water. If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water. Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby water 5 Make a loud noise. To get an alligator to release sometbing it bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not move, however, you will have gained its attention. 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover the object. The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its An alligator more than nine feet long is likely to be male, and males tend to be more aggressive. space. Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory. After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties, run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult human. will travel Who Has the Most Bite? ANIMAL NUMBER OF TEETH WARNING! whale Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the sharpest teeth in the world) You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water. The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch. Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any youngster lion 30: four canine, four carnassial, the rest conical human being 32 sloth bear 40 bear 42, including four canines and 12 incisors Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack without provocation. saltwater crocodile 68 to 70 alligator 80 to 88 giant armadillo up to 100 gavial (fish-eating crocodile) 102 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws Approach the alligator from behind. longspouted spinner up to 252 dolphin 2 Straddle the creature's back Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the alligator. up to 3,000 in five rows (the scariest mouth) great white shark 3 Crawl your way up to the head. 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike structures called radulae) snail Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth. Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape over the eyes of the beast. GClamp the jaws. Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin- gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth. Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the mouth is tightly closed use to open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to hold the mouth shut with bare hands. Z Take out your binding material. Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand, grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your teeth Wrap the tape six times around the snout Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s nout. WARNING! Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material that can be fied and knotted. Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open. Copyrighted Material seat igte 21 novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook
however: Copyrighted Material
 ALLIGATORS
 How To WRESTLE FREE
 FROM AN ALLIGATOR
 If you are on land, get on the alligator's back and put
 downward pressure on its neck.
 This will force its head and jaws down.
 2 Cover the alligator's eyes.
 This will usually make it more sedate.
 5 feet
 10 fet
 15 feet
 20 feet
 3 Go for the eyes and nose.
 If you are attacked, use any weapon you have, or your fist.
 4If its jaws are closed on something you want to remove
 (a limb), tap or punch it on the snout.
 Alligators often open their mouth when tapped lightly.
 They may drop whatever it is they have taken hold of and
 back off.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of the alligator.
 How To RETRIEVE AN OBJECT
 NEAR AN ALLIGATOR
 If the alligator gets you in its jaws, you must prevent it
 from shaking you or from rolling over-these instinctual
 actions cause severe tissue damage.
 Try to keep the mouth clamped shut so the alligator does
 not begin shaking.
 Determine the size of the alligator.
 Although even small alligators can cause injury, those less
 than four feet long are not as dangerous to humans. If the
 alligator is larger than six feet, be especially wary, as a bite
 6 Seek medical attention immediately, even for a small
 can inflict major damage. Alligators larger than nine feet
 should be considered deadly.
 cut or bruise, to treat infection.
 Alligators have a huge number of pathogens in their mouths
 2 Calculate the distance from the alligator to the object.
 The immediate danger zone is within 15 feet of an alligator.
 Try to determine if the alligator sees the object.
 Alligators are attracted to objects that appear to be food.
 4 Do not stand between the alligator and water.
 If disturbed, an alligator on land will seek refuge in water.
 Make sure the alligator is between you and any nearby
 water
 5 Make a loud noise.
 To get an alligator to release sometbing it
 bas in its mouth, tap it on the snout
 Alligators are sensitive to loud noises. Yelling or screar
 ing may cause the animal to leave. If the alligator does not
 move, however, you will have gained its attention.
 6Use a long branch, pole, or golf ball retriever to recover
 the object.
 The alligator may lunge and bite at objects that invade its
 An alligator more than nine feet
 long is likely to be male, and males
 tend to be more aggressive.
 space.
 Z Quickly move away from the alligator's territory.
 After retrieving the object, or if you encounter difficulties,
 run. While alligators can move fast-they rely on surprise
 Bill Finger, professional alligator breeder

 when attacking their usual prey-they generalfrichted,Material
 only short distances and probably cannot outrun an adult
 human.
 will travel
 Who Has the Most Bite?
 ANIMAL
 NUMBER OF TEETH
 WARNING!
 whale
 Alligators are native only to the United States and China. They are
 commonly found in the southwestern United Sates, primarily the
 Gulf Coast states buft as far north as North Carolina
 red-bellied piranha 20, in two rows of 10 (the
 sharpest teeth in the world)
 You are most likely to be attocked in or at the edge of water.
 The top speed of large alligators is around 10 miles per hour
 Be especially wary during spring months, when alligators wander
 in search of mates, and during late summer, when eggs hatch.
 Mother alligators will respond aggressively to threats to their
 young, and any adult alligator may come to the aid of any
 youngster
 lion
 30: four canine, four carnassial,
 the rest conical
 human being
 32
 sloth bear
 40
 bear
 42, including four canines and
 12 incisors
 Do not assume any alligator is safe to approach. While some
 animals may be habituated to the presence of humans, alligators
 are wld animals and therefore unpredictable: they may attack
 without provocation.
 saltwater crocodile
 68 to 70
 alligator
 80 to 88
 giant armadillo
 up to 100
 gavial (fish-eating
 crocodile)
 102
 How To BIND AN ALLIGATOR'S JAWws
 Approach the alligator from behind.
 longspouted spinner up to 252
 dolphin
 2 Straddle the creature's back
 Wrap your knees firmly around the midsection of the
 alligator.
 up to 3,000 in five rows (the
 scariest mouth)
 great white shark
 3 Crawl your way up to the head.
 10,000 to 30,000 (toothlike
 structures called radulae)
 snail
 Cover the alligator's eyes with a cloth.
 Use a thick piece of fabric or your own clothing to drape
 over the eyes of the beast.
 GClamp the jaws.
 Press down with your thumbs on the top and hold your fin-
 gers tightly underneath. The muscles that alligators
 5 Push the alligator's snout down to close its mouth.
 Lean forward and press firmly down on the snout until the
 mouth is tightly closed
 use to
 open their jaws are actually quite weak, so it is possible to
 hold the mouth shut with bare hands.
 Z Take out your binding material.
 Maintaining your grip on the gator's snout with one hand,
 grab your duct tape and tug free a two-foot strip with your
 teeth
 Wrap the tape
 six times around
 the snout
 Wind the tape six times around the alligator's s
 nout.
 WARNING!
 Lacking duct tape, you should bind the jaws of an aligator with
 rope, belt hick cloth (heavy shirt or pants), or any other material
 that can be fied and knotted.
 Never approach an alligatar head-on when its mouth is open.
 Copyrighted Material
 seat igte 21
novelty-gift-ideas:

Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook

novelty-gift-ideas: Ultimate Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook