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im free: Good morning gorgeous Mornin ( So I'm writing this book I've been working on it for a while, but I'm just stuck and have been for ages It's called "girls l'll disappoint in my 20's." wanna be in a chapter? Today 10:59 AM Do I get my own chapter? Oh for sure, I've gotta go over everything I could've done differently to make sure thatl don't fuck it up next time 'round Sounds like a lot of work Nah, after disappointing so many times it comes naturally Something you're quite proud of lol What'll be the name of my chapter? Or is that something you name afterwards? Today 12:54 PM Megan all the wrong choices How's that Disappointing You're doing well I can only go up from here My plan is working perfectly Oh? I'm just imagining you sitting there rubbing your hands together like an evil villain lol Oh yeah that's exactly what is happening here. Got my master plan right on track Next step is to make an awful first date and me dress up. n shist is about as nice Nah we're gonna find a nice bridge, cra open a carton of eggs and have some hobo chili Lmfao That sounds interesting Do the eggs go in the chili or do I get to throw them? Nah we throw them at each other, and let our body heat cook them. Just like how they did in the old days SWEET After that we can go to the local fountain and swim for a bit before qetting dessert Today 4:24 PM Can we get beignets? Today 4:42 PM Fine but you're paying Gonna be the worst date ever Ok so long as you're cooking the hobo chili K but in gonna burn it Fair warning When is this date? And there are gonna be a few hairs in it Extra flavor Oh god When are you free? I've got a butt load of work till Friday afternoon : I'm free Friday That works for me Cool Here's my number T Hobo chili
 im free: Good morning gorgeous
 Mornin (
 So I'm writing this book
 I've been working on it for a while, but I'm
 just stuck and have been for ages
 It's called "girls l'll disappoint in my 20's."
 wanna be in a chapter?
 Today 10:59 AM
 Do I get my own chapter?
 Oh for sure, I've gotta go over everything I
 could've done differently to make sure thatl
 don't fuck it up next time 'round
 Sounds like a lot of work
 Nah, after disappointing so many times it
 comes naturally
 Something you're quite proud of lol
 What'll be the name of my chapter?
 Or is that something you name afterwards?
 Today 12:54 PM
 Megan all the wrong choices
 How's that
 Disappointing
 You're doing well
 I can only go up from here
 My plan is working perfectly
 Oh?
 I'm just imagining you sitting there rubbing
 your hands together like an evil villain lol
 Oh yeah that's exactly what is happening
 here. Got my master plan right on track
 Next step is to make an awful first date
 and
 me dress up.
 n shist is about as nice
 Nah we're gonna find a nice bridge, cra
 open a carton of eggs and have some hobo
 chili
 Lmfao
 That sounds interesting
 Do the eggs go in the chili or do I get to
 throw them?
 Nah we throw them at each other, and let
 our body heat cook them. Just like how they
 did in the old days
 SWEET
 After that we can go to the local fountain
 and swim for a bit before qetting dessert
 Today 4:24 PM
 Can we get beignets?
 Today 4:42 PM
 Fine but you're paying
 Gonna be the worst date ever
 Ok so long as you're cooking the hobo
 chili
 K but in gonna burn it
 Fair warning
 When is this date?
 And there are gonna be a few hairs in it
 Extra flavor
 Oh god
 When are you free?
 I've got a butt load of work till Friday
 afternoon
 : I'm free Friday
 That works for me
 Cool
 Here's my number
 T
Hobo chili

Hobo chili

im free: Laura I'd like to take you up on getting coffee, by the way Mon, Jul 24, 2017, 12.00 AM Ahh I'm sorry for leaving you hanging. I might've dismissed the notification or something half asleep... But coffee would be great Stil being unemployed means Fhave free time in excess and a super flexible So just let me know when might work best for you Thu, Jul 27, 2017, 12-32 AM Wed, Aug 2,2017, 32 PM Hey Laura I know it can take forever agonizing over the perfect response, but the coffee is starting to get cold I've taken the liberty of preparing a few response choices for you, to help speed things along. Choose any letter choice you'd like to send A: I'm free to grab coffee this week i'li send you my number so we can coordinate a meet up B This week is kinda busy for me, but next week for surel I'i give you my number so we could coordinate a meet- C: I would like to grab coffee eventually but rm not quite sure when. 'll give you my number so we can figure out the when on a better platform D: Sorryi don't think I'm up for coffee anymore... you're just too intimidatingly attractive and intelligent for me. I'u still give you my number though, maybe we could meet up some time soon: Fri Aug 11, 2017, 324 AM Atter popular demand, we've decided to add a bonus answer choice, See the amendment in its entirety below E: I'd like more time to choose among options A-D, please bear with mel Sat, Aug 12, 2017, 12:26 AM While you decide among choices A-E I've written a limerick to pass the time There once was a match who's named Laura Who jammed to Chopin on Pandora, When she said she'd meet Drew For a hot Java brew She first had to grow coffee fora. Thu, Aug 24, 2017, 1:08 PM Limerícks are boring, lambic pentameter or bust Beneath the churning froth of pick-up ines, The sexting, whirling cesspool of regret, An empty cave extends like twisting mines The ghosts of voices echo in duet A conversation stalled for thirty days Still sometimes he'd return if memry served He'd rack his mind for further clever ways, To keep the chat that time forgot preserved, But life moves fast indeed for life in prime, From seeds to sprouts to trees to leaves wind-blown And so, our Laura ever lost to time And Drew forever in Starbucks alone 32017, all rights reserved Tue, Aug 29, 2017, 4:46 PM Ok I've contacted Amazon about publishing the book I wrote about this conversation, they said it could be online in three weeks ifi could slim it down 800 pages or so, I'll keep you posted through the editing process Mon, Sep 25, 2017,10:01 PM The book is finally supposed to be online tomorrow, and this bit of breaking news just published online thought you might want to see: Wed, Now 8.2017. 1137 PM We have a problem Laura the Weinsteirn Company was our sole investor the movie's in shambles now and there's no going back Today 8:15 PM Oh my god Oh my god GIF Not really sure who was more surprised here
 im free: Laura
 I'd like to take you up on getting
 coffee, by the way
 Mon, Jul 24, 2017, 12.00 AM
 Ahh I'm sorry for leaving you hanging.
 I might've dismissed the notification
 or something half asleep... But coffee
 would be great
 Stil being unemployed means Fhave
 free time in excess and a super flexible
 So just let me know when might work
 best for you
 Thu, Jul 27, 2017, 12-32 AM
 Wed, Aug 2,2017,
 32 PM
 Hey Laura I know it can take forever
 agonizing over the perfect response,
 but the coffee is starting to get cold
 I've taken the liberty of preparing a
 few response choices for you, to help
 speed things along. Choose any letter
 choice you'd like to send
 A: I'm free to grab coffee this week
 i'li send you my number so we can
 coordinate a meet up
 B This week is kinda busy for me, but
 next week for surel I'i give you my
 number so we could coordinate a meet-
 C: I would like to grab coffee eventually
 but rm not quite sure when. 'll give you
 my number so we can figure out the
 when on a better platform
 D: Sorryi don't think I'm up for coffee
 anymore... you're just too intimidatingly
 attractive and intelligent for me. I'u still
 give you my number though, maybe we
 could meet up some time soon:
 Fri Aug 11, 2017, 324 AM
 Atter popular demand, we've decided
 to add a bonus answer choice, See the
 amendment in its entirety below
 E: I'd like more time to choose among
 options A-D, please bear with mel
 Sat, Aug 12, 2017, 12:26 AM
 While you decide among choices A-E
 I've written a limerick to pass the time
 There once was a match who's named
 Laura
 Who jammed to Chopin on Pandora,
 When she said she'd meet Drew
 For a hot Java brew
 She first had to grow coffee fora.
 Thu, Aug 24, 2017, 1:08 PM
 Limerícks are boring, lambic
 pentameter or bust
 Beneath the churning froth of pick-up
 ines,
 The sexting, whirling cesspool of regret,
 An empty cave extends like twisting
 mines
 The ghosts of voices echo in duet
 A conversation stalled for thirty days
 Still sometimes he'd return if memry
 served
 He'd rack his mind for further clever
 ways,
 To keep the chat that time forgot
 preserved,
 But life moves fast indeed for life in
 prime,
 From seeds to sprouts to trees to
 leaves wind-blown
 And so, our Laura ever lost to time
 And Drew forever in Starbucks alone
 32017, all rights reserved
 Tue, Aug 29, 2017, 4:46 PM
 Ok I've contacted Amazon about
 publishing the book I wrote about this
 conversation, they said it could be
 online in three weeks ifi could slim it
 down 800 pages or so, I'll keep you
 posted through the editing process
 Mon, Sep 25, 2017,10:01 PM
 The book is finally supposed to
 be online tomorrow, and this bit of
 breaking news just published online
 thought you might want to see:
 Wed, Now 8.2017. 1137 PM
 We have a problem Laura the Weinsteirn
 Company was our sole investor the
 movie's in shambles now and there's no
 going back
 Today 8:15 PM
 Oh my god
 Oh my god
 GIF
Not really sure who was more surprised here

Not really sure who was more surprised here