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    A Dream, Click, and Fake: Do you want to know something that people
 don't tell you about being married for a long
 time?
 You actually do run out of things to talk about
 I know you might think I am kidding, but I am
 being a million percent truthsies over here. As
 a child, I always wondered what married
 people talked about, and was assured by many
 a family member that there were always things
 to discuss
 This is a lie. A big, fat one.

 It's really unfortunate that no one was truthful
 with me, because here I am with nothing to say
 and completely unprepared on how to deal. My
 husband and I go on a weekly date night and
 after I go into detail about my wild day
 working from home (I ate a Lean Cuisine, I
 answered three emails, I found a dollar in the
 wash), I have nothing.
 The other day I started to tell my husband
 about this super interesting thing that had
 happened, but then I was like, "oh never mind,
 I'm saving that for our date tonight" and he's
 like "um, WHAT?" and I was like, "well, when
 I've got something good I save it for date night
 so I have something to talk about. It seems like
 such a waste to spend it on a regular day.
 So then he thought that was one of the weirdest
 things he's ever heard about, which I assumed
 maybe HE already did that too? But he was
 like, "No, people do not do that."
 It's like I don't know how to be a person the
 right way sometimes.

 Every now and again my husband will ask
 "did you bake anything today, hon?" and ifI
 made CrΓ©me BruleΓ© Brownies I say "nope"
 because I'm hiding them and don't want to
 share.
 These fudgy little bites of bliss are covered in a
 thick vanilla custard that slices up like a
 dream. A sprinkling of sugar and a run under
 the broiler gets that caramelized, crackly top.
 Basically, these are perfect and you need them
 right now. That is all
benepla:
kramergate:
I love it when I click on a recipe link because it sounds yummy and instead of a recipe I get a several page dissertation on a food blogger’s boredom with her marriage and lies she was told in childhood
this ending in a recipe literally changed my fucking life i thought i was being spread some fucking truisms abt the ugliness of marriage but it was literally a preamble to creme brulee brownies. writing is fake

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                A Dream, Click, and Fake: Do you want to know something that people
 don't tell you about being married for a long
 time?
 You actually do run out of things to talk about
 I know you might think I am kidding, but I am
 being a million percent truthsies over here. As
 a child, I always wondered what married
 people talked about, and was assured by many
 a family member that there were always things
 to discuss
 This is a lie. A big, fat one.

 It's really unfortunate that no one was truthful
 with me, because here I am with nothing to say
 and completely unprepared on how to deal. My
 husband and I go on a weekly date night and
 after I go into detail about my wild day
 working from home (I ate a Lean Cuisine, I
 answered three emails, I found a dollar in the
 wash), I have nothing.
 The other day I started to tell my husband
 about this super interesting thing that had
 happened, but then I was like, "oh never mind,
 I'm saving that for our date tonight" and he's
 like "um, WHAT?" and I was like, "well, when
 I've got something good I save it for date night
 so I have something to talk about. It seems like
 such a waste to spend it on a regular day.
 So then he thought that was one of the weirdest
 things he's ever heard about, which I assumed
 maybe HE already did that too? But he was
 like, "No, people do not do that."
 It's like I don't know how to be a person the
 right way sometimes.

 Every now and again my husband will ask
 "did you bake anything today, hon?" and ifI
 made CrΓ©me BruleΓ© Brownies I say "nope"
 because I'm hiding them and don't want to
 share.
 These fudgy little bites of bliss are covered in a
 thick vanilla custard that slices up like a
 dream. A sprinkling of sugar and a run under
 the broiler gets that caramelized, crackly top.
 Basically, these are perfect and you need them
 right now. That is all
benepla:
kramergate:
I love it when I click on a recipe link because it sounds yummy and instead of a recipe I get a several page dissertation on a food blogger’s boredom with her marriage and lies she was told in childhood
this ending in a recipe literally changed my fucking life i thought i was being spread some fucking truisms abt the ugliness of marriage but it was literally a preamble to creme brulee brownies. writing is fake

                
            

            
            
benepla:
kramergate:
I love it when I click on a recipe link because it sounds yummy and instead of a recipe I get a several page dissertati...

            
            
        

    



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            



        

            
        
        

            




    Bad, Creepy, and Cute: i want! to sit! in a lap! and i want! to
 do they have to be attached
 I love your need to make everything cute
 sounds creepy I love that
 Well I's funny how you can make
 everything sound creepy/wrong but the
 things that you like
 Make this creepy:
 Skittles are very good
 it depends where you put them
 you challenged a god
 Make this creepy:
 An instrumental cover of a well-known song
 plays from another room. It starts slow
 rhythm inconsistent, like a child struggling
 with a hand-played music box. It is the
 unmistakable tune of Despacito, played on an
 old circus organ. You open your eyes slowly
 and squint up at a single, flickering bulb. Your
 head aches. How did you get here?
 The music throbs against the bathroom's
 crumbling tile walls. You are standing in
 front of a ceramic sink, the bowl chipped and
 yellowed with age. You have no memory of
 this place. The music speeds up. Your hands
 are stained with something dark and rotting.
 A strange taste lingers in your mouth. How
 did you get here?
 You lean towards the mirror. Your face is
 haggard, your eyes bloodshot.
 Your reflection leans forward and
 whispers, "Despacito
 can you do
 llike wearing glasses
 Most people have never seen me without my
 glasses. I wear them all the time. All day, at
 home, in bed, even in the bath sometimes.
 I pretty much only take them off to shower
 or sleep. And even then I keep them within
 arm's reach.
 Igot my first pair in middle school, and it
 changed my life. I've switched styles plenty
 of times over the years, Right now I own
 three pairs, not including my backups and
 prescription sunglasses. I'm always paranoid
 about losing or breaking the ones I'm wearing.
 Most people would be surprised to find out
 my eyesight isn't even that bad. ReallyI only
 need corrective lenses for distance. I could
 manage most things without them. But I
 like wearing glasses
 Not that it can't be frustrating at times
 Eyeglasses are always getting smudged or
 dirty. I have to clean mine constantly. They're
 fragile, and can be scratched or bent. They
 fall off, go askew, steam up, and collect
 water drops when it rains. You have to keep a
 protective case on hand, and a soft cloth, and
 glass cleaner. They can be a lot of trouble.
 Honestly, contact lenses would be so much
 more convenient
 I did try to switch, once. I bought a box of
 those new disposable contacts. And it was
 great at first-just put them on and go. It was
 freeing. My eyes adjusted quickly-no itching
 or redness. It didn't even feel that strange
 not having something on my face for the
 first time in years.
 I really thought they were going to work. They
 didn't, in the end. Maybe it's something about
 the material, the difference between actual
 glass versus whatever polymer the contacts
 were made from. Maybe it has to do with
 lens shape, or distance. Maybe it's even just
 psychological-something to do with the fact
 that glasses just feel more protective. I had
 hoped now that I was older, perhaps I wouldn't
 need protection. Perhaps they wouldn't
 come after me the way they did when I was
 a child. I was wrong.
 Glasses stop the dark things from moving
 you see. If I don't wear them, I start seeing the
 things again. Out of the corners of my eyes.
 In the shadows of the room. Glasses are the
 only thing I've found that keeps them still.
 And that's important. Because you see,
 the things aren't just moving-theyre
 moving closer
 Gaud it's past 1 am please
 Sometimes I just think Gaud is moved by
 the full and pure force of f
 people's minds
 ucking up other
 why the flip do u think i spend so much
 time on this hellsite
 57,107 notes
They challenged a god. They will pay for their hubris
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Bad, Creepy, and Cute: i want! to sit! in a lap! and i want! to
 do they have to be attached
 I love your need to make everything cute
 sounds creepy I love that
 Well I's funny how you can make
 everything sound creepy/wrong but the
 things that you like
 Make this creepy:
 Skittles are very good
 it depends where you put them
 you challenged a god
 Make this creepy:
 An instrumental cover of a well-known song
 plays from another room. It starts slow
 rhythm inconsistent, like a child struggling
 with a hand-played music box. It is the
 unmistakable tune of Despacito, played on an
 old circus organ. You open your eyes slowly
 and squint up at a single, flickering bulb. Your
 head aches. How did you get here?
 The music throbs against the bathroom's
 crumbling tile walls. You are standing in
 front of a ceramic sink, the bowl chipped and
 yellowed with age. You have no memory of
 this place. The music speeds up. Your hands
 are stained with something dark and rotting.
 A strange taste lingers in your mouth. How
 did you get here?
 You lean towards the mirror. Your face is
 haggard, your eyes bloodshot.
 Your reflection leans forward and
 whispers, "Despacito
 can you do
 llike wearing glasses
 Most people have never seen me without my
 glasses. I wear them all the time. All day, at
 home, in bed, even in the bath sometimes.
 I pretty much only take them off to shower
 or sleep. And even then I keep them within
 arm's reach.
 Igot my first pair in middle school, and it
 changed my life. I've switched styles plenty
 of times over the years, Right now I own
 three pairs, not including my backups and
 prescription sunglasses. I'm always paranoid
 about losing or breaking the ones I'm wearing.
 Most people would be surprised to find out
 my eyesight isn't even that bad. ReallyI only
 need corrective lenses for distance. I could
 manage most things without them. But I
 like wearing glasses
 Not that it can't be frustrating at times
 Eyeglasses are always getting smudged or
 dirty. I have to clean mine constantly. They're
 fragile, and can be scratched or bent. They
 fall off, go askew, steam up, and collect
 water drops when it rains. You have to keep a
 protective case on hand, and a soft cloth, and
 glass cleaner. They can be a lot of trouble.
 Honestly, contact lenses would be so much
 more convenient
 I did try to switch, once. I bought a box of
 those new disposable contacts. And it was
 great at first-just put them on and go. It was
 freeing. My eyes adjusted quickly-no itching
 or redness. It didn't even feel that strange
 not having something on my face for the
 first time in years.
 I really thought they were going to work. They
 didn't, in the end. Maybe it's something about
 the material, the difference between actual
 glass versus whatever polymer the contacts
 were made from. Maybe it has to do with
 lens shape, or distance. Maybe it's even just
 psychological-something to do with the fact
 that glasses just feel more protective. I had
 hoped now that I was older, perhaps I wouldn't
 need protection. Perhaps they wouldn't
 come after me the way they did when I was
 a child. I was wrong.
 Glasses stop the dark things from moving
 you see. If I don't wear them, I start seeing the
 things again. Out of the corners of my eyes.
 In the shadows of the room. Glasses are the
 only thing I've found that keeps them still.
 And that's important. Because you see,
 the things aren't just moving-theyre
 moving closer
 Gaud it's past 1 am please
 Sometimes I just think Gaud is moved by
 the full and pure force of f
 people's minds
 ucking up other
 why the flip do u think i spend so much
 time on this hellsite
 57,107 notes
They challenged a god. They will pay for their hubris
                
            

            
            
They challenged a god. They will pay for their hubris