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Curving, Fashion, and Head: Pendulum financialeconomicsexplainedus: POSTED:  10/09/2019 The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - it basically moves between growth and value investing - it is that simple! After a recession, when the whole stock market cycle, the business cycle and the credit cycle have gone bust:  interest rates are low to super low, the Fed is trying to stimulate the economy - Investors start to look at Growth Stocks/ Growth-Oriented Mutual Funds (a growth stock is one that generally averages about 20% growth per year along with the technology sectors like semiconductors and Biotech/Pharmaceuticals)….. Small Cap stocks/Mutual Funds also take off - money is cheap to borrow to fund R&D, marketing expenses, etc. But Value stocks/Mutual Funds also start to rise:  A RISING TIDE LIFTS ALL BOATS - was the 90′s moniker! Hence, the market starts to take off:  as markets start to heat up and the economy starts to OVERHEAT - the Fed starts to raise interests to COOL the market down - like in November 1999 - the Fed had raised the Federal Funds rate way up to a whopping 6.5% to try and cool down the economy and to put a damper on the Dot.com Boom - fueled stock market!  Those who forget history do not recall that the yield curve inverted in 1998; the Federal Funds rate was too high in 1999 (FYI side note:  the “average” technology mutual fund in 1999 was up 100%!!!!!!!!!!!! by years’ end)  Guess what?  The whole market crashed in April 2000! So from that time to about mid-June 2000 - the market went nowhere!   Value investing and investing in Bonds (like Intermediate and Long-term Treasury Bonds (backed by the full faith of the US government) went up from June 2000 to December 2000 (Berkshire Hathaway A shares went up over 85% that year within 6 months!).  Warren Buffet?  Look him up!  Treasuries also did extremely well - like one “Talking Head” has been quoted as saying - “There is always a Bull Market somewhere”…… And the whole process starts over again from a boom to bust cycle, about every 10 years or so……the Real Estate Market moves in a boom to bust cycle about every 7 years…. MY OPINION – stay the course with Value-oriented Investing:  it works in both up and down markets!  A mix of Value Mutual Funds and Treasury Bond Mutual Funds weather ALL storms - OVER THE LONG HAUL - and yes, expect a few hiccups along the way too LOL!)….Exchange Traded Funds (ETF’s) investing will work too - but, I like Mutual Funds - the minimums are $3,000.00 however (at least) to start investing in a SINGLE fund.  DO YOUR RESEARCH/DUE DILIGENCE ON THE WEB and also on YOU TUBE! Guys - the overall stock market climbs in a stair-step fashion:  up, then sideways/down and then up again!  Invest for the long term (like 30-50+ years)….YOU WILL BE A WINNER!  Be it an investment account or a retirement account or BOTH:  like a personal investment account and a ROTH IRA or an employer-sponsored 401k Plan along with a personal investment account. Dollar-Cost Average your contributions to personal investment/ROTH accounts; that is invest the same $ amount each and every month - regardless, whether the market is up or down!  Ignore the noise!  Ignore the Talking Heads”. CURRENT MARKET :  MY OPINION Me personally, I am accumulating cash and letting my current investment portfolio just ride along with this geo-politically fueled/baseless rate cut economic environment …Impeachment talks, China Trade War escalation, Iran concerns, Saudi Arabia bombings, Japan-South Korea tensions as well as renewed North Korea tension over prior failed talks, the American Farmers plight due to the trade war, negative return/yield rates on European Bonds, Brexit concerns, a dollar that is too strong, etc. When American companies start to cut back, lay people off, these people can not keep spending to keep GDP/the economy growing, then these people can not pay their mortgages/auto loans/credit cards….Will it be “somewhat” similar to 2008… all over again? I have no professional opinion nor do I have a crystal ball – Maybe the FED will engineer a “SOFT” Landing”…..this time: they never did in the past when “Bubbles” Greenspan or “Helicopter Ben” Bernake were FEDERAL RESERVE CHAIRMEN. THOSE THAT FORGET HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEAT IT…. Flash
Curving, Fashion, and Head: Pendulum
financialeconomicsexplainedus:
POSTED:  10/09/2019
The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - it basically moves between growth and value investing - it is that simple!
After a recession, when the whole stock market cycle, the business cycle and the credit cycle have gone bust:  interest rates are low to super low, the Fed is trying to stimulate the economy - Investors start to look at Growth Stocks/ Growth-Oriented Mutual Funds (a growth stock is one that generally averages about 20% growth per year along with the technology sectors like semiconductors and Biotech/Pharmaceuticals)….. Small Cap stocks/Mutual Funds also take off - money is cheap to borrow to fund R&D, marketing expenses, etc. 
But Value stocks/Mutual Funds also start to rise:  A RISING TIDE LIFTS ALL BOATS - was the 90′s moniker!
Hence, the market starts to take off:  as markets start to heat up and the economy starts to OVERHEAT - the Fed starts to raise interests to COOL the market down - like in November 1999 - the Fed had raised the Federal Funds rate way up to a whopping 6.5% to try and cool down the economy and to put a damper on the Dot.com Boom - fueled stock market!  
Those who forget history do not recall that the yield curve inverted in 1998; the Federal Funds rate was too high in 1999 (FYI side note:  the “average” technology mutual fund in 1999 was up 100%!!!!!!!!!!!! by years’ end)  Guess what?  The whole market crashed in April 2000!
So from that time to about mid-June 2000 - the market went nowhere!   Value investing and investing in Bonds (like Intermediate and Long-term Treasury Bonds (backed by the full faith of the US government) went up from June 2000 to December 2000 (Berkshire Hathaway A shares went up over 85% that year within 6 months!).  Warren Buffet?  Look him up!  Treasuries also did extremely well - like one “Talking Head” has been quoted as saying - “There is always a Bull Market somewhere”……
And the whole process starts over again from a boom to bust cycle, about every 10 years or so……the Real Estate Market moves in a boom to bust cycle about every 7 years….
MY OPINION – stay the course with Value-oriented Investing:  it works in both up and down markets!  A mix of Value Mutual Funds and Treasury Bond Mutual Funds weather ALL storms - OVER THE LONG HAUL - and yes, expect a few hiccups along the way too LOL!)….Exchange Traded Funds (ETF’s) investing will work too - but, I like Mutual Funds - the minimums are $3,000.00 however (at least) to start investing in a SINGLE fund.  DO YOUR RESEARCH/DUE DILIGENCE ON THE WEB and also on YOU TUBE!
Guys - the overall stock market climbs in a stair-step fashion:  up, then sideways/down and then up again!  Invest for the long term (like 30-50+ years)….YOU WILL BE A WINNER!  Be it an investment account or a retirement account or BOTH:  like a personal investment account and a ROTH IRA or an employer-sponsored 401k Plan along with a personal investment account.
Dollar-Cost Average your contributions to personal investment/ROTH accounts; that is invest the same $ amount each and every month - regardless, whether the market is up or down!  Ignore the noise!  Ignore the Talking Heads”.
CURRENT MARKET :  MY OPINION
Me personally, I am accumulating cash and letting my current investment portfolio just ride along with this geo-politically fueled/baseless rate cut economic environment …Impeachment talks, China Trade War escalation, Iran concerns, Saudi Arabia bombings, Japan-South Korea tensions as well as renewed North Korea tension over prior failed talks, the American Farmers plight due to the trade war, negative return/yield rates on European Bonds, Brexit concerns, a dollar that is too strong, etc.
When American companies start to cut back, lay people off, these people can not keep spending to keep GDP/the economy growing, then these people can not pay their mortgages/auto loans/credit cards….Will it be “somewhat” similar to 2008… all over again? 
I have no professional opinion nor do I have a crystal ball – Maybe the FED will engineer a “SOFT” Landing”…..this time: they never did in the past when “Bubbles” Greenspan or “Helicopter Ben” Bernake were FEDERAL RESERVE CHAIRMEN.
THOSE THAT FORGET HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEAT IT….
Flash

financialeconomicsexplainedus: POSTED:  10/09/2019 The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - i...

Curving, Fashion, and Head: Pendulum financialeconomicsexplainedus: POSTED:  10/09/2019 The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - it basically moves between growth and value investing - it is that simple! After a recession, when the whole stock market cycle, the business cycle and the credit cycle have gone bust:  interest rates are low to super low, the Fed is trying to stimulate the economy - Investors start to look at Growth Stocks/ Growth-Oriented Mutual Funds (a growth stock is one that generally averages about 20% growth per year along with the technology sectors like semiconductors and Biotech/Pharmaceuticals)….. Small Cap stocks/Mutual Funds also take off - money is cheap to borrow to fund R&D, marketing expenses, etc. But Value stocks/Mutual Funds also start to rise:  A RISING TIDE LIFTS ALL BOATS - was the 90′s moniker! Hence, the market starts to take off:  as markets start to heat up and the economy starts to OVERHEAT - the Fed starts to raise interests to COOL the market down - like in November 1999 - the Fed had raised the Federal Funds rate way up to a whopping 6.5% to try and cool down the economy and to put a damper on the Dot.com Boom - fueled stock market!  Those who forget history do not recall that the yield curve inverted in 1998; the Federal Funds rate was too high in 1999 (FYI side note:  the “average” technology mutual fund in 1999 was up 100%!!!!!!!!!!!! by years’ end)  Guess what?  The whole market crashed in April 2000! So from that time to about mid-June 2000 - the market went nowhere!   Value investing and investing in Bonds (like Intermediate and Long-term Treasury Bonds (backed by the full faith of the US government) went up from June 2000 to December 2000 (Berkshire Hathaway A shares went up over 85% that year within 6 months!).  Warren Buffet?  Look him up!  Treasuries also did extremely well - like one “Talking Head” has been quoted as saying - “There is always a Bull Market somewhere”…… And the whole process starts over again from a boom to bust cycle, about every 10 years or so……the Real Estate Market moves in a boom to bust cycle about every 7 years…. MY OPINION – stay the course with Value-oriented Investing:  it works in both up and down markets!  A mix of Value Mutual Funds and Treasury Bond Mutual Funds weather ALL storms - OVER THE LONG HAUL - and yes, expect a few hiccups along the way too LOL!)….Exchange Traded Funds (ETF’s) investing will work too - but, I like Mutual Funds - the minimums are $3,000.00 however (at least) to start investing in a SINGLE fund.  DO YOUR RESEARCH/DUE DILIGENCE ON THE WEB and also on YOU TUBE! Guys - the overall stock market climbs in a stair-step fashion:  up, then sideways/down and then up again!  Invest for the long term (like 30-50+ years)….YOU WILL BE A WINNER!  Be it an investment account or a retirement account or BOTH:  like a personal investment account and a ROTH IRA or an employer-sponsored 401k Plan along with a personal investment account. Dollar-Cost Average your contributions to personal investment/ROTH accounts; that is invest the same $ amount each and every month - regardless, whether the market is up or down!  Ignore the noise!  Ignore the Talking Heads”. CURRENT MARKET :  MY OPINION Me personally, I am accumulating cash and letting my current investment portfolio just ride along with this geo-politically fueled/baseless rate cut economic environment …Impeachment talks, China Trade War escalation, Iran concerns, Saudi Arabia bombings, Japan-South Korea tensions as well as renewed North Korea tension over prior failed talks, the American Farmers plight due to the trade war, negative return/yield rates on European Bonds, Brexit concerns, a dollar that is too strong, etc. When American companies start to cut back, lay people off, these people can not keep spending to keep GDP/the economy growing, then these people can not pay their mortgages/auto loans/credit cards….Will it be “somewhat” similar to 2008… all over again? I have no professional opinion nor do I have a crystal ball – Maybe the FED will engineer a “SOFT” Landing”…..this time: they never did in the past when “Bubbles” Greenspan or “Helicopter Ben” Bernake were FEDERAL RESERVE CHAIRMEN. THOSE THAT FORGET HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEAT IT…. Flash
Curving, Fashion, and Head: Pendulum
financialeconomicsexplainedus:
POSTED:  10/09/2019
The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - it basically moves between growth and value investing - it is that simple!
After a recession, when the whole stock market cycle, the business cycle and the credit cycle have gone bust:  interest rates are low to super low, the Fed is trying to stimulate the economy - Investors start to look at Growth Stocks/ Growth-Oriented Mutual Funds (a growth stock is one that generally averages about 20% growth per year along with the technology sectors like semiconductors and Biotech/Pharmaceuticals)….. Small Cap stocks/Mutual Funds also take off - money is cheap to borrow to fund R&D, marketing expenses, etc. 
But Value stocks/Mutual Funds also start to rise:  A RISING TIDE LIFTS ALL BOATS - was the 90′s moniker!
Hence, the market starts to take off:  as markets start to heat up and the economy starts to OVERHEAT - the Fed starts to raise interests to COOL the market down - like in November 1999 - the Fed had raised the Federal Funds rate way up to a whopping 6.5% to try and cool down the economy and to put a damper on the Dot.com Boom - fueled stock market!  
Those who forget history do not recall that the yield curve inverted in 1998; the Federal Funds rate was too high in 1999 (FYI side note:  the “average” technology mutual fund in 1999 was up 100%!!!!!!!!!!!! by years’ end)  Guess what?  The whole market crashed in April 2000!
So from that time to about mid-June 2000 - the market went nowhere!   Value investing and investing in Bonds (like Intermediate and Long-term Treasury Bonds (backed by the full faith of the US government) went up from June 2000 to December 2000 (Berkshire Hathaway A shares went up over 85% that year within 6 months!).  Warren Buffet?  Look him up!  Treasuries also did extremely well - like one “Talking Head” has been quoted as saying - “There is always a Bull Market somewhere”……
And the whole process starts over again from a boom to bust cycle, about every 10 years or so……the Real Estate Market moves in a boom to bust cycle about every 7 years….
MY OPINION – stay the course with Value-oriented Investing:  it works in both up and down markets!  A mix of Value Mutual Funds and Treasury Bond Mutual Funds weather ALL storms - OVER THE LONG HAUL - and yes, expect a few hiccups along the way too LOL!)….Exchange Traded Funds (ETF’s) investing will work too - but, I like Mutual Funds - the minimums are $3,000.00 however (at least) to start investing in a SINGLE fund.  DO YOUR RESEARCH/DUE DILIGENCE ON THE WEB and also on YOU TUBE!
Guys - the overall stock market climbs in a stair-step fashion:  up, then sideways/down and then up again!  Invest for the long term (like 30-50+ years)….YOU WILL BE A WINNER!  Be it an investment account or a retirement account or BOTH:  like a personal investment account and a ROTH IRA or an employer-sponsored 401k Plan along with a personal investment account.
Dollar-Cost Average your contributions to personal investment/ROTH accounts; that is invest the same $ amount each and every month - regardless, whether the market is up or down!  Ignore the noise!  Ignore the Talking Heads”.
CURRENT MARKET :  MY OPINION
Me personally, I am accumulating cash and letting my current investment portfolio just ride along with this geo-politically fueled/baseless rate cut economic environment …Impeachment talks, China Trade War escalation, Iran concerns, Saudi Arabia bombings, Japan-South Korea tensions as well as renewed North Korea tension over prior failed talks, the American Farmers plight due to the trade war, negative return/yield rates on European Bonds, Brexit concerns, a dollar that is too strong, etc.
When American companies start to cut back, lay people off, these people can not keep spending to keep GDP/the economy growing, then these people can not pay their mortgages/auto loans/credit cards….Will it be “somewhat” similar to 2008… all over again? 
I have no professional opinion nor do I have a crystal ball – Maybe the FED will engineer a “SOFT” Landing”…..this time: they never did in the past when “Bubbles” Greenspan or “Helicopter Ben” Bernake were FEDERAL RESERVE CHAIRMEN.
THOSE THAT FORGET HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEAT IT….
Flash

financialeconomicsexplainedus: POSTED:  10/09/2019 The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - i...

Curving, Fashion, and Head: Pendulum financialeconomicsexplainedus: POSTED:  10/09/2019 The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - it basically moves between growth and value investing - it is that simple! After a recession, when the whole stock market cycle, the business cycle and the credit cycle have gone bust:  interest rates are low to super low, the Fed is trying to stimulate the economy - Investors start to look at Growth Stocks/ Growth-Oriented Mutual Funds (a growth stock is one that generally averages about 20% growth per year along with the technology sectors like semiconductors and Biotech/Pharmaceuticals)….. Small Cap stocks/Mutual Funds also take off - money is cheap to borrow to fund R&D, marketing expenses, etc. But Value stocks/Mutual Funds also start to rise:  A RISING TIDE LIFTS ALL BOATS - was the 90′s moniker! Hence, the market starts to take off:  as markets start to heat up and the economy starts to OVERHEAT - the Fed starts to raise interests to COOL the market down - like in November 1999 - the Fed had raised the Federal Funds rate way up to a whopping 6.5% to try and cool down the economy and to put a damper on the Dot.com Boom - fueled stock market!  Those who forget history do not recall that the yield curve inverted in 1998; the Federal Funds rate was too high in 1999 (FYI side note:  the “average” technology mutual fund in 1999 was up 100%!!!!!!!!!!!! by years’ end)  Guess what?  The whole market crashed in April 2000! So from that time to about mid-June 2000 - the market went nowhere!   Value investing and investing in Bonds (like Intermediate and Long-term Treasury Bonds (backed by the full faith of the US government) went up from June 2000 to December 2000 (Berkshire Hathaway A shares went up over 85% that year within 6 months!).  Warren Buffet?  Look him up!  Treasuries also did extremely well - like one “Talking Head” has been quoted as saying - “There is always a Bull Market somewhere”…… And the whole process starts over again from a boom to bust cycle, about every 10 years or so……the Real Estate Market moves in a boom to bust cycle about every 7 years…. MY OPINION – stay the course with Value-oriented Investing:  it works in both up and down markets!  A mix of Value Mutual Funds and Treasury Bond Mutual Funds weather ALL storms - OVER THE LONG HAUL - and yes, expect a few hiccups along the way too LOL!)….Exchange Traded Funds (ETF’s) investing will work too - but, I like Mutual Funds - the minimums are $3,000.00 however (at least) to start investing in a SINGLE fund.  DO YOUR RESEARCH/DUE DILIGENCE ON THE WEB and also on YOU TUBE! Guys - the overall stock market climbs in a stair-step fashion:  up, then sideways/down and then up again!  Invest for the long term (like 30-50+ years)….YOU WILL BE A WINNER!  Be it an investment account or a retirement account or BOTH:  like a personal investment account and a ROTH IRA or an employer-sponsored 401k Plan along with a personal investment account. Dollar-Cost Average your contributions to personal investment/ROTH accounts; that is invest the same $ amount each and every month - regardless, whether the market is up or down!  Ignore the noise!  Ignore the Talking Heads”. CURRENT MARKET :  MY OPINION Me personally, I am accumulating cash and letting my current investment portfolio just ride along with this geo-politically fueled/baseless rate cut economic environment …Impeachment talks, China Trade War escalation, Iran concerns, Saudi Arabia bombings, Japan-South Korea tensions as well as renewed North Korea tension over prior failed talks, the American Farmers plight due to the trade war, negative return/yield rates on European Bonds, Brexit concerns, a dollar that is too strong, etc. When American companies start to cut back, lay people off, these people can not keep spending to keep GDP/the economy growing, then these people can not pay their mortgages/auto loans/credit cards….Will it be “somewhat” similar to 2008… all over again? I have no professional opinion nor do I have a crystal ball – Maybe the FED will engineer a “SOFT” Landing”…..this time: they never did in the past when “Bubbles” Greenspan or “Helicopter Ben” Bernake were FEDERAL RESERVE CHAIRMEN. THOSE THAT FORGET HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEAT IT…. Flash
Curving, Fashion, and Head: Pendulum
financialeconomicsexplainedus:
POSTED:  10/09/2019
The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - it basically moves between growth and value investing - it is that simple!
After a recession, when the whole stock market cycle, the business cycle and the credit cycle have gone bust:  interest rates are low to super low, the Fed is trying to stimulate the economy - Investors start to look at Growth Stocks/ Growth-Oriented Mutual Funds (a growth stock is one that generally averages about 20% growth per year along with the technology sectors like semiconductors and Biotech/Pharmaceuticals)….. Small Cap stocks/Mutual Funds also take off - money is cheap to borrow to fund R&D, marketing expenses, etc. 
But Value stocks/Mutual Funds also start to rise:  A RISING TIDE LIFTS ALL BOATS - was the 90′s moniker!
Hence, the market starts to take off:  as markets start to heat up and the economy starts to OVERHEAT - the Fed starts to raise interests to COOL the market down - like in November 1999 - the Fed had raised the Federal Funds rate way up to a whopping 6.5% to try and cool down the economy and to put a damper on the Dot.com Boom - fueled stock market!  
Those who forget history do not recall that the yield curve inverted in 1998; the Federal Funds rate was too high in 1999 (FYI side note:  the “average” technology mutual fund in 1999 was up 100%!!!!!!!!!!!! by years’ end)  Guess what?  The whole market crashed in April 2000!
So from that time to about mid-June 2000 - the market went nowhere!   Value investing and investing in Bonds (like Intermediate and Long-term Treasury Bonds (backed by the full faith of the US government) went up from June 2000 to December 2000 (Berkshire Hathaway A shares went up over 85% that year within 6 months!).  Warren Buffet?  Look him up!  Treasuries also did extremely well - like one “Talking Head” has been quoted as saying - “There is always a Bull Market somewhere”……
And the whole process starts over again from a boom to bust cycle, about every 10 years or so……the Real Estate Market moves in a boom to bust cycle about every 7 years….
MY OPINION – stay the course with Value-oriented Investing:  it works in both up and down markets!  A mix of Value Mutual Funds and Treasury Bond Mutual Funds weather ALL storms - OVER THE LONG HAUL - and yes, expect a few hiccups along the way too LOL!)….Exchange Traded Funds (ETF’s) investing will work too - but, I like Mutual Funds - the minimums are $3,000.00 however (at least) to start investing in a SINGLE fund.  DO YOUR RESEARCH/DUE DILIGENCE ON THE WEB and also on YOU TUBE!
Guys - the overall stock market climbs in a stair-step fashion:  up, then sideways/down and then up again!  Invest for the long term (like 30-50+ years)….YOU WILL BE A WINNER!  Be it an investment account or a retirement account or BOTH:  like a personal investment account and a ROTH IRA or an employer-sponsored 401k Plan along with a personal investment account.
Dollar-Cost Average your contributions to personal investment/ROTH accounts; that is invest the same $ amount each and every month - regardless, whether the market is up or down!  Ignore the noise!  Ignore the Talking Heads”.
CURRENT MARKET :  MY OPINION
Me personally, I am accumulating cash and letting my current investment portfolio just ride along with this geo-politically fueled/baseless rate cut economic environment …Impeachment talks, China Trade War escalation, Iran concerns, Saudi Arabia bombings, Japan-South Korea tensions as well as renewed North Korea tension over prior failed talks, the American Farmers plight due to the trade war, negative return/yield rates on European Bonds, Brexit concerns, a dollar that is too strong, etc.
When American companies start to cut back, lay people off, these people can not keep spending to keep GDP/the economy growing, then these people can not pay their mortgages/auto loans/credit cards….Will it be “somewhat” similar to 2008… all over again? 
I have no professional opinion nor do I have a crystal ball – Maybe the FED will engineer a “SOFT” Landing”…..this time: they never did in the past when “Bubbles” Greenspan or “Helicopter Ben” Bernake were FEDERAL RESERVE CHAIRMEN.
THOSE THAT FORGET HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEAT IT….
Flash

financialeconomicsexplainedus: POSTED:  10/09/2019 The Stock market, as well as the overall economy, moves between a boom and bust cycle - i...

Beautiful, Community, and God: 21 Answers votes oldest newest You can't parse [X]HTML with regex. Because HTML can't be parsed by regex. Regex is not a tool that can be used to correctly parse HTML. As I have answered in HTML-and-regex questions here so many times before, the use of regex will not allow you to consume HTML. Regular expressions are a tool that is insufficiently sophisticated to understand the constructs employed by HTML. HTML is not a regular language and hence cannot be parsed by regular expressions. Regex queries are not equipped to break down HTML into its meaningful parts. so many times but it is not getting to me. Even enhanced irregular regular expressions as used by Perl are not up to the task of parsing HTML. You will never make me crack. HTML is a language of sufficient complexity that it cannot be parsed by regular expressions. Even Jon Skeet cannot parse HTML using regular expressions. Every time you attempt to parse HTML with regular expressions, the unholy child weeps the blood of virgins, and Russian hackers pwn your webapp. Parsing HTML with regex summons tainted souls into the realm of the living. HTML and regex go together like love, marriage, and ritual infanticide. The <center> cannot hold it is too late. The force of regex and HTML together in the same conceptual space will destroy your mind like so much watery putty. If you parse HTML with regex you are giving in to Them and their blasphemous ways which doom us all to inhuman toil for the One whose Name cannot be expressed in the Basic Multilingual Plane, he comes. HTML-plus-regexp will liquify the nerves of the sentient whilst you observe, your psyche withering in the onslaught of horror. Regex-based HTML parsers are the cancer that is killing StackOverflow it is too late it is too late we cannot be saved the trangession of a child ensures regex will consume all living tissue (except for HTML which it cannot, as previously prophesied) dear lord help us how can anyone survive this scourge using regex to parse HTML has doomed humanity to an eternity of dread torture and security holes using regex as a tool to process HTML establishes a breach between this world and the dread realm of čorrupt entities (like SGML entities, but more corrupt) a mere glimpse of the world of reg ex parsers for HTML will instantly transport a programmer's consciousness into a world of ceaseless screaming, he comes-the pestilent slithy regex-infection will devour your HTML parser, application and existence for all time like Vişual Basic only worse he comes he comes do not fight he comes, his uņholy radiance destroping all enlightenment, HTML tags leaking frọm your eyesiike liquid pain, the song of regular expression parsing-will extinguish the voices of mortal man from the sphere I can see it can you see t it is beautiful the f inal snuf fing of the lies of Man ALL ĮS LOSTALL IS LOST the pony he comes he comes hejcemes the ichor permeates al MY FACEFACEh god no NO NOOoo Ne stop the an ges aře not reâj ZALGO IS TON THË PONY, HECOMES 1811 Have you tried using an XML parser instead? link edit flag edited Nov 14 at 0:18 community wiki bobince regex and html
Beautiful, Community, and God: 21 Answers
 votes
 oldest
 newest
 You can't parse [X]HTML with regex. Because HTML can't be parsed by regex. Regex is not a tool that
 can be used to correctly parse HTML. As I have answered in HTML-and-regex questions here so many
 times before, the use of regex will not allow you to consume HTML. Regular expressions are a tool that is
 insufficiently sophisticated to understand the constructs employed by HTML. HTML is not a regular
 language and hence cannot be parsed by regular expressions. Regex queries are not equipped to break
 down HTML into its meaningful parts. so many times but it is not getting to me. Even enhanced irregular
 regular expressions as used by Perl are not up to the task of parsing HTML. You will never make me
 crack. HTML is a language of sufficient complexity that it cannot be parsed by regular expressions. Even
 Jon Skeet cannot parse HTML using regular expressions. Every time you attempt to parse HTML with
 regular expressions, the unholy child weeps the blood of virgins, and Russian hackers pwn your webapp.
 Parsing HTML with regex summons tainted souls into the realm of the living. HTML and regex go together
 like love, marriage, and ritual infanticide. The <center> cannot hold it is too late. The force of regex and
 HTML together in the same conceptual space will destroy your mind like so much watery putty. If you
 parse HTML with regex you are giving in to Them and their blasphemous ways which doom us all to
 inhuman toil for the One whose Name cannot be expressed in the Basic Multilingual Plane, he comes.
 HTML-plus-regexp will liquify the nerves of the sentient whilst you observe, your psyche withering in the
 onslaught of horror. Regex-based HTML parsers are the cancer that is killing StackOverflow it is too late
 it is too late we cannot be saved the trangession of a child ensures regex will consume all living tissue
 (except for HTML which it cannot, as previously prophesied) dear lord help us how can anyone survive
 this scourge using regex to parse HTML has doomed humanity to an eternity of dread torture and
 security holes using regex as a tool to process HTML establishes a breach between this world and the
 dread realm of čorrupt entities (like SGML entities, but more corrupt) a mere glimpse of the world of reg
 ex parsers for HTML will instantly transport a programmer's consciousness into a world of ceaseless
 screaming, he comes-the pestilent slithy regex-infection will devour your HTML parser, application and
 existence for all time like Vişual Basic only worse he comes he comes do not fight he comes, his uņholy
 radiance destroping all enlightenment, HTML tags leaking frọm your eyesiike liquid pain, the song of
 regular expression parsing-will extinguish the voices of mortal man from the sphere I can see it can you
 see t it is beautiful the f inal snuf fing of the lies of Man ALL ĮS LOSTALL IS LOST the pony he
 comes he comes hejcemes the ichor permeates al MY FACEFACEh god no NO NOOoo Ne
 stop the an ges aře not reâj ZALGO IS TON THË PONY, HECOMES
 1811
 Have you tried using an XML parser instead?
 link edit flag
 edited Nov 14 at 0:18
 community wiki
 bobince
regex and html

regex and html

Af, Books, and Crying: ti skerb Retweeted Shan AF RJ mesa 15 - AF SP mesa 71 @ShanaBRX Jun 14 Fuck everyone who whines about ao3 News All News May 2019 Newsletter, Volume 135 Published: Thu 13 Jun 2019 01:03PM 03 Comments: 4 Recently, the Archive of Our Own has received an influx of new Chinese users, a result of tightening content restrictions on other platforms. We would like to extend our warmest welcome to them, and remind everyone that our committees are working to make AO3 as accessible as possible in languages other than English Read more... 20 t 2.8K 6.4K Show this thread wetwareproblem: wrangletangle: zoe2213414: eabevella: naryrising: You can read the post here for more info, but I wanted to just add a bit about what this entails from my POV, on the Support team.  Somewhere between ¼ to 1/3 of all our tickets last month were in Chinese (somewhere upwards of 300 out of 1200 or so), almost all from users just setting up their accounts or trying to find out how to get an invitation.  A lot of the tickets are what I’d characterize as “intro” tickets - they say hi, list favourite fandoms or pairings, or provide samples of fic they’ve written. Although this isn’t necessary on AO3, this is not uncommon in Chinese fandom sites that you have to prove your credentials to get in (in fact it wasn’t uncommon in English-language fandom sites 15-20 years ago).  We respond to all of these tickets, even the ones that just say hi.  We check whether the user has managed to receive their invite or get their account sent up, and if they haven’t, we help them do so.  This means taking every single ticket through our Chinese translation team twice, once so we make sure we understand the initial ticket, and then again to translate our reply.  This is a challenging process, although we’ve found ways to streamline it and can normally get a reply out pretty quickly (like within a few days).  We do it because this is part of why AO3 exists in the first place - to provide a safe haven where users can post their works without worrying about censorship or sudden crackdowns on certain kinds of content.  We do it because this is important, and helping these users get their accounts and be able to share their works safely is why we’re here.  We hope that we’ll be able to help as many of them as possible.   There have been a few (thankfully few, that I’ve seen) complaints about these new AO3 users not always knowing how things work - what language to tag with, or what fandom tags to use, for instance.  To this I would say: 1. Have patience and be considerate.  They are coming to a new site that they aren’t familiar with, and using it in a language they may not be expert in, and it might take a while to learn the ropes.  You can filter out works tagged in Chinese if you don’t want to see them.  Or just scroll past.   2. You can report works tagged with the wrong language or the wrong fandom to our Policy and Abuse team using the link at the bottom of any page.  This will not cause the authors to “get in trouble” (a concern I’ve heard before, as people are reluctant to report for these reasons).  It means the Policy and Abuse team will contact them to ask them to change the language/fandom tag, and if the creator doesn’t, they can edit it directly.  If you remember Strikethrough or the FF.net porn ban or similar purges, please keep them in mind and consider that these users are going through something similar or potentially worse.  This is why AO3 exists.  We are doing our best to try and help make the transition smooth.   I am a Taiwanese and I’d like to put some context behind the recent influx of China based AO3 users. China is tightening their freedom of speech in recent years after Xi has became the chairman (he even canceled the 10 years long term of service of chairman, meaning he can stay as the leader of China as long as he lives–he has became a dictator). They censor words that are deemed “sensitive”, you can’t type anything to criticize the chinise government. Big social media platform won’t even post the posts containing sensitive words. You don’t have the freedom of publish books without the books being approved by the government either. To disguise this whole Ninety Eighty-Four nightmare, they started to pick on the easy target: the women and the minorities (China is getting more and more misogynistic as a result of the government trying to control their male population through encouraging them to control the female population through “chinese tradition family value” but that’s another story). Last year, the chinese government arrested a woman who is a famous yaoi/BL novel writer named 天一 and sentenced her 10 years in jail for “selling obscene publications” and “illegal publication” (she’s not the only BL writer who got arrested. Meanwhile, multiple cases where men raped women only get about 2 years of jail time in China). It’s a warning to anyone who want to publish anything that’s “not approved” by the government that they can literally ruin you.  Just recently the chinese government “contacted” website owners of one of their largest romance/yaoi/slash fiction sites 晉江 and announced that for now on, for the sake of a Clean Society, they can’t write anything that’s slightly “obscene”. No sex scene, no sexual interaction, they can’t even write any bodily interaction below neck (I’m not kidding here). But that’s not their actual goal. They also listed other restriction such as: can’t write anything that’s about the government, the military, the police, “sensitive history”, “race problems”, which is… you basically can’t write anything that might be used as a tool to criticize the government (as many novels did). This recent development really hurt the chinese fanfic writers. They can’t write anything without the fear of being put on the guillotine by the government to show their control. Most of them don’t even think that deep politically, they just want to write slash fictions. But there are no platform safe in China, that’s why the sudden influx of chinese users to AO3. I bet it won’t be long before AO3 got banned in China, but until then, be a little bit patient to them. As much as I hate the chinese government, I pity their people. I’m crying so loud…As a Chinese, you don’t know how your kindness meant to us. When I’m young, I read 1984, and I thought this story is so unrealistic, but now, it’s getting tougher and tougher for fanfic and the writer in China. Thank you ao3. Thank you for the people who care about Chinese people. (hope I didn’t spell anything wrong) The OTW’s account on Weibo, the biggest Chinese social media site, is constantly fielding questions from Chinese users about how to get invitations, how to post, all of it. Chinese fans deeply want to learn how to use AO3. The difference between Lofter’s posting system and AO3′s is perhaps even wider than the gulf between Tumblr and AO3. But imagine if you had to navigate across that gap in a language you didn’t speak, using translation programs that don’t understand fan terminology. This is exactly what the AO3 was built to deal with. We just didn’t get a chance to get the internationalization done first, so things may be bumpy for a while. We are all part of fandom, so let’s take care not to leave anyone out. Just in case it isn’t clear to anyone? This. This right here is precisely why the AO3 doesn’t police content or remove things that are icky or obscene. Because it’s not you who defines what’s obscene. It’s the authorities.
Af, Books, and Crying: ti skerb Retweeted
 Shan AF RJ mesa 15 - AF SP mesa 71 @ShanaBRX Jun 14
 Fuck everyone who whines about ao3
 News
 All News
 May 2019 Newsletter, Volume 135
 Published: Thu 13 Jun 2019 01:03PM 03 Comments: 4
 Recently, the Archive of Our Own has received an influx of
 new Chinese users, a result of tightening content restrictions
 on other platforms. We would like to extend our warmest
 welcome to them, and remind everyone that our committees
 are working to make AO3 as accessible as possible in
 languages other than English
 Read more...
 20
 t 2.8K
 6.4K
 Show this thread
wetwareproblem:
wrangletangle:

zoe2213414:

eabevella:

naryrising:

You can read the post here for more info, but I wanted to just add a bit about what this entails from my POV, on the Support team.  Somewhere between ¼ to 1/3 of all our tickets last month were in Chinese (somewhere upwards of 300 out of 1200 or so), almost all from users just setting up their accounts or trying to find out how to get an invitation.  A lot of the tickets are what I’d characterize as “intro” tickets - they say hi, list favourite fandoms or pairings, or provide samples of fic they’ve written. Although this isn’t necessary on AO3, this is not uncommon in Chinese fandom sites that you have to prove your credentials to get in (in fact it wasn’t uncommon in English-language fandom sites 15-20 years ago).  We respond to all of these tickets, even the ones that just say hi.  We check whether the user has managed to receive their invite or get their account sent up, and if they haven’t, we help them do so.  This means taking every single ticket through our Chinese translation team twice, once so we make sure we understand the initial ticket, and then again to translate our reply. 
This is a challenging process, although we’ve found ways to streamline it and can normally get a reply out pretty quickly (like within a few days).  We do it because this is part of why AO3 exists in the first place - to provide a safe haven where users can post their works without worrying about censorship or sudden crackdowns on certain kinds of content.  We do it because this is important, and helping these users get their accounts and be able to share their works safely is why we’re here.  We hope that we’ll be able to help as many of them as possible.  
There have been a few (thankfully few, that I’ve seen) complaints about these new AO3 users not always knowing how things work - what language to tag with, or what fandom tags to use, for instance.  To this I would say:
1. Have patience and be considerate.  They are coming to a new site that they aren’t familiar with, and using it in a language they may not be expert in, and it might take a while to learn the ropes.  You can filter out works tagged in Chinese if you don’t want to see them.  Or just scroll past.  
2. You can report works tagged with the wrong language or the wrong fandom to our Policy and Abuse team using the link at the bottom of any page.  This will not cause the authors to “get in trouble” (a concern I’ve heard before, as people are reluctant to report for these reasons).  It means the Policy and Abuse team will contact them to ask them to change the language/fandom tag, and if the creator doesn’t, they can edit it directly. 
If you remember Strikethrough or the FF.net porn ban or similar purges, please keep them in mind and consider that these users are going through something similar or potentially worse.  This is why AO3 exists.  We are doing our best to try and help make the transition smooth.  

I am a Taiwanese and I’d like to put some context behind the recent influx of China based AO3 users.
China is tightening their freedom of speech in recent years after Xi has became the chairman (he even canceled the 10 years long term of service of chairman, meaning he can stay as the leader of China as long as he lives–he has became a dictator). 
They censor words that are deemed “sensitive”, you can’t type anything to criticize the chinise government. Big social media platform won’t even post the posts containing sensitive words. You don’t have the freedom of publish books without the books being approved by the government either.
To disguise this whole Ninety Eighty-Four nightmare, they started to pick on the easy target: the women and the minorities (China is getting more and more misogynistic as a result of the government trying to control their male population through encouraging them to control the female population through “chinese tradition family value” but that’s another story). 
Last year, the chinese government arrested a woman who is a famous yaoi/BL novel writer named 天一 and sentenced her 10 years in jail for “selling obscene publications” and “illegal publication” (she’s not the only BL writer who got arrested. Meanwhile, multiple cases where men raped women only get about 2 years of jail time in China). It’s a warning to anyone who want to publish anything that’s “not approved” by the government that they can literally ruin you.  
Just recently the chinese government “contacted” website owners of one of their largest romance/yaoi/slash fiction sites 
晉江

and announced that for now on, for the sake of a Clean Society, they can’t write anything that’s slightly “obscene”. No sex scene, no sexual interaction, they can’t even write any bodily interaction below neck (I’m not kidding here). 
But that’s not their actual goal. They also listed other restriction such as: can’t write anything that’s about the government, the military, the police, “sensitive history”, “race problems”, which is… you basically can’t write anything that might be used as a tool to criticize the government (as many novels did). 
This recent development really hurt the chinese fanfic writers. They can’t write anything without the fear of being put on the guillotine by the government to show their control. Most of them don’t even think that deep politically, they just want to write slash fictions. But there are no platform safe in China, that’s why the sudden influx of chinese users to AO3. 
I bet it won’t be long before AO3 got banned in China, but until then, be a little bit patient to them. As much as I hate the chinese government, I pity their people. 


I’m crying so loud…As a Chinese, you don’t know how your kindness meant to us. When I’m young, I read 1984, and I thought this story is so unrealistic, but now, it’s getting tougher and tougher for fanfic and the writer in China. Thank you ao3. Thank you for the people who care about Chinese people. (hope I didn’t spell anything wrong)

The OTW’s account on Weibo, the biggest Chinese social media site, is
 constantly fielding questions from Chinese users about how to get 
invitations, how to post, all of it. Chinese fans deeply want to learn 
how to use AO3. The difference between Lofter’s posting system and AO3′s
 is perhaps even wider than the gulf between Tumblr and AO3. But imagine
 if you had to navigate across that gap in a language you didn’t speak, 
using translation programs that don’t understand fan terminology.
This is exactly
 what the AO3 was built to deal with. We just didn’t get a chance to get
 the internationalization done first, so things may be bumpy for a 
while. We are all part of fandom, so let’s take care not to leave 
anyone out.


Just in case it isn’t clear to anyone? This. This right here is precisely why the AO3 doesn’t police content or remove things that are icky or obscene.
Because it’s not you who defines what’s obscene. It’s the authorities.

wetwareproblem: wrangletangle: zoe2213414: eabevella: naryrising: You can read the post here for more info, but I wanted to just add a b...

Beautiful, Bored, and Head: Here's a prime example of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" offered by an English professor from the University of Phoenix: The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex- periment with a new form called the tandem story The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home- work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para- graph and send another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and then add another para- graph to the story and send it back, also sending an- other copy to me. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on back-and-forth. Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab- solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any- thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail. The story is over when both agree a con- clusion has been reached." The following was actually turned in by two of his English students: Rebecca and Gary THE STORY: (first paragraph by Rebecca) At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started acting up again. So chamomile was out of the second paragraph by Gary) Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit. (Rebecca) He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per- manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news si- multaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and care- free, with no newspaper to read, no television to distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully Gary) Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec- onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace disarmament Treaty through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em- pires who were determined to destroy the human race. Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en- tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid Laurie. (Rebecca) This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin- istic semi-literate adolescent. Gary) Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle Steele novels!" Gary) B*tch. (Rebecca) F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea. A+ Ireally liked this one. epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’
Beautiful, Bored, and Head: Here's a prime example of "Men Are
 From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
 offered by an English professor from
 the University of Phoenix:
 The professor told his class one day: Today we will ex-
 periment with a new form called the tandem story
 The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the
 person sitting to his or her immediate right. As home-
 work tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph
 of a short story. You will e-mail your partner that para-
 graph and send another copy to me. The partner will
 read the first paragraph and then add another para-
 graph to the story and send it back, also sending an-
 other copy to me. The first person will then add a third
 paragraph, and so on back-and-forth.
 Remember to re-read what has been written each time
 in order to keep the story coherent. There is to be ab-
 solutely NO talking outside of the e-mails and any-
 thing you wish to say must be written in the e-mail.
 The story is over when both agree a con-
 clusion has been reached."
 The following was actually turned in by two of his
 English students:
 Rebecca and Gary
 THE STORY:
 (first paragraph by Rebecca)
 At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea
 she wanted. The chamomile, which used to be her
 favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded
 her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
 times, that he liked chamomile.
 But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her
 mind off Carl. His possessiveness was suffocating,
 and if she thought about him too much her asthma
 started acting up again. So chamomile was out of
 the
 second paragraph by Gary)
 Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of
 the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4,
 had more important things to think about than the
 neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo named
 Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night
 over a year ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17," he
 said into his transgalactic communicator. " Polar
 orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But
 before he could sign off a bluish particle beam
 flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through
 his ship's cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent
 him flying out of his seat and across the ####pit.
 (Rebecca)
 He bumped his head and died almost immediately,
 but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
 psychically brutalizing the one woman who had
 ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
 stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peace
 ful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Per-
 manently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie
 read in her newspaper one morning. The news si-
 multaneously excited her and bored her. She
 stared out the window, dreaming of her youth,
 when the days had passed unhurriedly and care-
 free, with no newspaper to read, no television to
 distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at
 all the beautiful things around
 her. "Why must one
 lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she
 pondered wistfully
 Gary)
 Little did she know, but she had less than 10 sec-
 onds to live. Thousands of miles above the city, the
 Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its
 lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
 peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace
 disarmament Treaty through the congress had left
 Earth a defenseless target for the hostile alien em-
 pires who were determined to destroy the human
 race. Within two hours after the passage of the
 treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for
 Earth, carrying enough firepower to pulverize the
 With no one to stop them, they swiftly initiated
 their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile en-
 tered the atmosphere unimpeded. The President,
 in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters
 on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam, felt the
 inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized
 poor, stupid Laurie.
 (Rebecca)
 This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of
 literature. My writing partner is a violent, chauvin-
 istic semi-literate adolescent.
 Gary)
 Yeah? Well, my writing partner is a self-centered
 tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the
 literary equivalent of Valium. Oh, shall I have
 chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of
 F-KING TEA??? Oh no, what am I to do? I'm such an
 air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
 Steele novels!"
 Gary)
 B*tch.
 (Rebecca)
 F K YOU-YOU NEANDERTHALI
 In your dreams, Ho. Go drink some tea.
 A+
 Ireally liked this one.
epicjohndoe:

A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

epicjohndoe: A Very Good Example Of ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’

America, Community, and Cute: Mira Jacob @mirajacob Two things I didn't know until I was yesterday years old: 1) Memorial Day was started by African Americans honoring fallen Union solders 2) The Statue of Liberty was gifted to America to celebrate freed slaves, not immigrants. Erasure is real, you all. But that part we knew. 7:28 AM May 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 37.2K Likes 12.2K Retweets valquainton: ms-demeanor: ms-demeanor: the-barista-who-became-a-rabbit: meganphntmgrl: panic-boy-21: blckrapunzel: laughingacademy: interficio-vos: thatpettyblackgirl: The White Wash is real. One of the Earliest Memorial Day Ceremonies Was Held by Freed Slaves The Statue of Liberty was created to celebrate freed slaves, not immigrants, its new museum recounts Just wait until you google what the original Statue of Liberty(that got refused by America)looked like For those of you who don’t want to look it up yourselves: Lady Liberty is a black woman. Guys, this has been thoroughly debunked since 2000, and it does the statue on the left there a huge disservice to treat her as an unwanted copy. That’s Lady Liberty of St. Maarten, an homage from 2007 (post-dating the debunking, even) that was dedicated to the anniversary of the ending of slavery there: The Statue of Liberty in New York Harbor is a representation of Libertas, the Roman goddess of freedom, with bonus American iconography: HOWEVER: Lady Liberty in New York is not based on a white woman, either.  She’s a Muslim Arab woman, at least in terms of the modeling of her face. Her face was reused from an abandoned project to build a colossal statue of a modern Egyptian Arab peasant woman near the Suez Canal (as verified by the Smithsonian, no less). While she wasn’t originally dedicated specifically for immigrants, the poem “The New Colossus” was added specifically because of the position she occupied in the harbor and the symbolic visual power she would have to immigrants coming in. The author, Emma Lazarus, was Jewish. It’s important to fight back on the whitewashing of history, because it happens left and right, but it shouldn’t happen at the cost of misinformation that treats Lady Liberty of St. Maarten as an unwanted prototype rather than a powerful monument in her own right and, ironically, claims that she’s now a white woman when she’s not while also ignoring the powerful influence of the Jewish-American community on the final version. Geez, I’m really tired of people trying to spout false shit all over tumblr. Like, this post has 37K notes, But I assure you, that like many other false posts, ¾ of the notes are from people who saw the false bit and prefered to reblog it that way and be mad, instead of just making a simple google search Hi Darling Friends of Tumblr. I’ve been taking too long to do data entry and I’m not good at actually doing analysis so it’s time to start naming and shaming. @thatpettyblackgirl is a blog that I’ve been observing for a while that has a really interesting pattern of behavior. Namely, posting a bunch of shit like this. Remember that tweet about Olive Garden supporting Donald Trump that was debunked? Well when it circulated on tumblr two weeks ago it was because of @thatpettyblackgirl You know the misreported post about the school lunch program that refused donations from a local businessman? That was a different blogger but thatpettyblackgirl has circulated another version of it. That other blogger has a posting history that’s full of the same kinds of things thatpettyblackgirl posts - lots of reposts from twitter, lots of screenshots from other sites, not a lot of commentary, and things that are decontextualized enough to make them seem worse than they are or to totally misrepresent the actions depicted (like this reposted video and tweets indignant about a man being arrested when the very specific purpose of his protest was to get arrested). It reminds me of that post about coconut husks as a wood alternative that’s been circulating recently - a screenshot of a white man above a news article is posted with the complaint that white people “discovering” coconuts after disregarding them as useless when the article is about a new method of processing coconut husks that allows them to be put to new uses. That blog is fascinating. And has a lot in common with thatpettyblackgirl - both of them reblog their own posts at a rate that’s higher than I’ve seen on most tumblrs (btw, you should know that a while back I asked for volunteers who would let me explore their tumblrs and while my research sample isn’t random it is a collection of small and large blogs and none of them have *checks notes* reblogged their own post of a bunch of screencaps of a tweet storm five times in the last couple of days). Both of them tend to post screencaps, neither one really writes much. They reblog a lot of memes, and both have some pretty big textposts that are just straight rip-offs of tweets (”bi folks have you eaten today? answer quick and iced coffee doesn’t count” is one of thatpettyblackgirl’s recent popular textposts and it’s ripped off from twitter.) They also reblog eachother a fair amount - along with @whyyoustabbedme and @endangered-justice-seeker, who ALSO have really weird posting patterns. Also all four of those blogs are part of a group of nine blogs that were created in a three-week period of 2017 that I’ve been watching that don’t seem to follow a pattern of normal tumblr behavior and that also post an awful lot of incorrect viral posts and are staggeringly popular (for clarity: blackqueerblog is not one of the nine created in that time period). ANYWAY this is all reminding me very strongly of bellygangstaboo and lagonegirl. I know I probably sound like this image: But there are excellent, thoughtful bloggers who discuss police brutality, racism in the US, class warefare, and institutional bias who aren’t ALSO unflaggingly committed to having their own dedicated Snopes pages. @odinsblog, Franchesca Ramsey, @antifainternational, and @mostlysignssomeportents might be a good place to start. My dudes, I don’t want to be depressing so I’ll let Vanity Fair do it for me: That Russian operatives could so effectively engage Americans with tactics as simple as Facebook ads, fake-news postings, and Twitter trolls, shows how dangerous misinformation is in the social-media age, when propaganda can be so easily amplified. More important, it highlights how primed Americans already were for manipulation. When the ICE raids started up again a few months ago thatpettyblackgirl was posting about how shameful it was that there was nothing that could be done. A lot of these blogs are writing about how it’s impossible for black people to succeed in America, they’re writing about how voting is always rigged and you can’t fight the system. And you know what that goes against every fucking principle of my cold little anarchist heart. These blogs are full of despair - they look like they’re full of cute memes and fresh news but they’re a poisoned pill telling you not to bother because you can’t fight the system. They’re not offering help, they’re training you not to bother fighting for your rights (there was a popular post about how the Hong Kong protesters are light years ahead of US protesters - that post didn’t talk about mutual aid or sharing tactics, it just said “people in the US would never” and left it at that, like we can’t learn from each other and share information across borders) Fucking. Anyway. I’ve been fairly quiet about this because I’ve been trying to be all good and data sciencey about it but I’ve seen this post on my dash fifty times this week. Keep your eye out for @thatpettyblackgirl  @uncommonbish @whyyoustabbedme and @blackqueerblog - all of them have large followings and are known to post tweets and news articles out of context and if you’re considering reblogging information from one of their blogs please make a point to fact-check the post yourself. Not everything they post is wrong. I don’t know if these are real bloggers who don’t care about the potential negative impact of their tweet thievery or if they’re weird psyops blogs that are intended to make you feel hopeless about your place in the political process. Whatever they are it doesn’t matter when they continually post misinformation and don’t seem to care about stopping so please be cautious. Anyway, I’m cataloguing these sorts of posts at @psyops-redux so if you want to keep an eye out for stuff that’s debunked I’ll tag by originating blogger over there. Stay safe, buds. Dammit, I got all fired up and I forgot to add: THERE’S A GAME THAT HELPS YOU RECOGNIZE WHEN PEOPLE ARE POSTING MISINFORMATION AND MAKES YOU LESS SUSCEPTIBLE TO THIS KIND OF PROPAGANDA AND YOU SHOULD ALL GO PLAY IT. Ah. The number reposts from their own blogs had puzzled me in the past. I assumed it was something to do with the way Tumblr runs that I wasn’t tech-savvy enough to understand. But this makes a lot of sense. Unless someone tells me otherwise, I’m gonna go ahead and unfollow the blogs listed. Any recommendations for actual historical/current affairs poc blogs to follow instead?
America, Community, and Cute: Mira Jacob
 @mirajacob
 Two things I didn't know until I was
 yesterday years old:
 1) Memorial Day was started by
 African Americans honoring fallen
 Union solders
 2) The Statue of Liberty was gifted to
 America to celebrate freed slaves, not
 immigrants.
 Erasure is real, you all. But that part
 we knew.
 7:28 AM May 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone
 37.2K Likes
 12.2K Retweets
valquainton:

ms-demeanor:

ms-demeanor:

the-barista-who-became-a-rabbit:

meganphntmgrl:

panic-boy-21:

blckrapunzel:

laughingacademy:

interficio-vos:

thatpettyblackgirl:


The White Wash is real.



One of the Earliest Memorial Day Ceremonies Was Held by Freed Slaves
The Statue of Liberty was created to celebrate freed slaves, not immigrants, its new museum recounts



Just wait until you google what the original Statue of Liberty(that got refused by America)looked like


For those of you who don’t want to look it up yourselves:
Lady Liberty is a black woman.

Guys, this has been thoroughly debunked since 2000, and it does the statue on the left there a huge disservice to treat her as an unwanted copy. That’s Lady Liberty of St. Maarten, an homage from 2007 (post-dating the debunking, even) that was dedicated to the anniversary of the ending of slavery there:
The Statue of Liberty in New York Harbor is a representation of Libertas, the Roman goddess of freedom, with bonus American iconography:
HOWEVER: Lady Liberty in New York is not based on a white woman, either. 
She’s a Muslim Arab woman, at least in terms of the modeling of her face. Her face was reused from an abandoned project to build a colossal statue of a modern Egyptian Arab peasant woman near the Suez Canal (as verified by the Smithsonian, no less).
While she wasn’t originally dedicated specifically for immigrants, the poem “The New Colossus” was added specifically because of the position she occupied in the harbor and the symbolic visual power she would have to immigrants coming in. The author, Emma Lazarus, was Jewish.
It’s important to fight back on the whitewashing of history, because it happens left and right, but it shouldn’t happen at the cost of misinformation that treats Lady Liberty of St. Maarten as an unwanted prototype rather than a powerful monument in her own right and, ironically, claims that she’s now a white woman when she’s not while also ignoring the powerful influence of the Jewish-American community on the final version.

Geez, I’m really tired of people trying to spout false shit all over tumblr. Like, this post has 37K notes, But I assure you, that like many other false posts, ¾ of the notes are from people who saw the false bit and prefered to reblog it that way and be mad, instead of just making a simple google search

Hi Darling Friends of Tumblr.
I’ve been taking too long to do data entry and I’m not good at actually doing analysis so it’s time to start naming and shaming.
@thatpettyblackgirl is a blog that I’ve been observing for a while that has a really interesting pattern of behavior. 
Namely, posting a bunch of shit like this. 
Remember that tweet about Olive Garden supporting Donald Trump that was debunked? Well when it circulated on tumblr two weeks ago it was because of @thatpettyblackgirl
You know the misreported post about the school lunch program that refused donations from a local businessman? That was a different blogger but thatpettyblackgirl has circulated another version of it. 
That other blogger has a posting history that’s full of the same kinds of things thatpettyblackgirl posts - lots of reposts from twitter, lots of screenshots from other sites, not a lot of commentary, and things that are decontextualized enough to make them seem worse than they are or to totally misrepresent the actions depicted (like this reposted video and tweets indignant about a man being arrested when the very specific purpose of his protest was to get arrested).
It reminds me of that post about coconut husks as a wood alternative that’s been circulating recently - a screenshot of a white man above a news article is posted with the complaint that white people “discovering” coconuts after disregarding them as useless when the article is about a new method of processing coconut husks that allows them to be put to new uses. 
That blog is fascinating. And has a lot in common with thatpettyblackgirl - both of them reblog their own posts at a rate that’s higher than I’ve seen on most tumblrs (btw, you should know that a while back I asked for volunteers who would let me explore their tumblrs and while my research sample isn’t random it is a collection of small and large blogs and none of them have *checks notes* reblogged their own post of a bunch of screencaps of a tweet storm five times in the last couple of days). Both of them tend to post screencaps, neither one really writes much. They reblog a lot of memes, and both have some pretty big textposts that are just straight rip-offs of tweets (”bi folks have you eaten today? answer quick and iced coffee doesn’t count” is one of thatpettyblackgirl’s recent popular textposts and it’s ripped off from twitter.) They also reblog eachother a fair amount - along with @whyyoustabbedme and @endangered-justice-seeker, who ALSO have really weird posting patterns.
Also all four of those blogs are part of a group of nine blogs that were created in a three-week period of 2017 that I’ve been watching that don’t seem to follow a pattern of normal tumblr behavior and that also post an awful lot of incorrect viral posts and are staggeringly popular (for clarity: blackqueerblog is not one of the nine created in that time period). 

ANYWAY this is all reminding me very strongly of bellygangstaboo and lagonegirl. 
I know I probably sound like this image:
But there are excellent, thoughtful bloggers who discuss police brutality, racism in the US, class warefare, and institutional bias who aren’t ALSO unflaggingly committed to having their own dedicated Snopes pages. @odinsblog, Franchesca Ramsey, @antifainternational, and @mostlysignssomeportents might be a good place to start. 
My dudes, I don’t want to be depressing so I’ll let Vanity Fair do it for me:

That Russian operatives could so effectively engage Americans with 
tactics as simple as Facebook ads, fake-news postings, and Twitter 
trolls, shows how dangerous misinformation is in the social-media age, 
when propaganda can be so easily amplified. More important, it 
highlights how primed Americans already were for manipulation. 
When the ICE raids started up again a few months ago thatpettyblackgirl was posting about how shameful it was that there was nothing that could be done. A lot of these blogs are writing about how it’s impossible for black people to succeed in America, they’re writing about how voting is always rigged and you can’t fight the system.
And you know what that goes against every fucking principle of my cold little anarchist heart. These blogs are full of despair - they look like they’re full of cute memes and fresh news but they’re a poisoned pill telling you not to bother because you can’t fight the system. They’re not offering help, they’re training you not to bother fighting for your rights (there was a popular post about how the Hong Kong protesters are light years ahead of US protesters - that post didn’t talk about mutual aid or sharing tactics, it just said “people in the US would never” and left it at that, like we can’t learn from each other and share information across borders)
Fucking. Anyway. I’ve been fairly quiet about this because I’ve been trying to be all good and data sciencey about it but I’ve seen this post on my dash fifty times this week. 
Keep your eye out for @thatpettyblackgirl  @uncommonbish @whyyoustabbedme and @blackqueerblog - all of them have large followings and are known to post tweets and news articles out of context and if you’re considering reblogging information from one of their blogs please make a point to fact-check the post yourself. 
Not everything they post is wrong. I don’t know if these are real bloggers who don’t care about the potential negative impact of their tweet thievery or if they’re weird psyops blogs that are intended to make you feel hopeless about your place in the political process. Whatever they are it doesn’t matter when they continually post misinformation and don’t seem to care about stopping so please be cautious.
Anyway, I’m cataloguing these sorts of posts at @psyops-redux so if you want to keep an eye out for stuff that’s debunked I’ll tag by originating blogger over there.
Stay safe, buds. 

Dammit, I got all fired up and I forgot to add:

THERE’S A GAME THAT HELPS YOU RECOGNIZE WHEN PEOPLE ARE POSTING MISINFORMATION AND MAKES YOU LESS SUSCEPTIBLE TO THIS KIND OF PROPAGANDA AND YOU SHOULD ALL GO PLAY IT.


Ah.  The number reposts from their own blogs had puzzled me in the past.  I assumed it was something to do with the way Tumblr runs that I wasn’t tech-savvy enough to understand.  But this makes a lot of sense.  Unless someone tells me otherwise, I’m gonna go ahead and unfollow the blogs listed.  Any recommendations for actual historical/current affairs poc blogs to follow instead?

valquainton: ms-demeanor: ms-demeanor: the-barista-who-became-a-rabbit: meganphntmgrl: panic-boy-21: blckrapunzel: laughingacademy: ...

Apple, God, and Google: oooo Sprint LTE @ 99% 8:54 AM Settings Emergency Chat Meltdown gave you my phone because l can't use or process speech right now, but l am still capable of text communication. My hearing and tactile senses are extremely sensitive in this state, so please refrain from touching me. Please keep calm, and proceed to the next screen that has a simple chat client through which we can communicate. Continue R...ht New Message Send @ 99% ooo Sprint LTE 9:02 AM Settings Emergency Chat Today 9:02 AM would you like to get out of here? Left yes please R...ht New Message Send the I'm O p qw r У u f jk d gh а S C b Z X 123 return space sweetandsavageautistic: thathumanwiththecatears: kuroba101: sweet-and-tender: lesbiandana: hello! I don’t know if anyone has already made a post about this before, but I just stumbled upon this app made specifically for when you’ve gone into a nonverbal anxiety attack!!! it was made by Jeroen De Busser who is an autistic computer science student. the app is really easy to use! all you do is open it and hand your phone to someone you need to communicate with during an attack but physically cannot, and it shows this cool little alert for the person to read, and then it takes them to an easy to use chat (that looks a lot like texting! except both of you are communicating using the same device).  the alert message is completely customizable and you can have it say whatever you need!  the app is called Emergency Chat and it’s available in the Apple Store and google play store.  I highly recommend it to anyone who might need it :) OH MY GOD?!?!?? BOOST That’s so bootiful! thank you so much for this because i never know what to do when i cant talk to people and they just start trying to ask me questions and its really hard to force myself to say i cant talk and stuff. im definately getting this right now WHAT?
Apple, God, and Google: oooo Sprint LTE
 @ 99%
 8:54 AM
 Settings
 Emergency Chat
 Meltdown
 gave you my phone because l
 can't use or process speech
 right now, but l am still capable
 of text communication. My
 hearing and tactile senses are
 extremely sensitive in this state,
 so please refrain from touching
 me. Please keep calm, and
 proceed to the next screen that
 has a simple chat client through
 which we can communicate.
 Continue
 R...ht New Message
 Send

 @ 99%
 ooo Sprint LTE
 9:02 AM
 Settings
 Emergency Chat
 Today 9:02 AM
 would you like to get out of here?
 Left
 yes please
 R...ht New Message
 Send
 the
 I'm
 O p
 qw
 r
 У
 u
 f
 jk
 d
 gh
 а
 S
 C
 b
 Z
 X
 123
 return
 space
sweetandsavageautistic:
thathumanwiththecatears:

kuroba101:

sweet-and-tender:

lesbiandana:

hello! I don’t know if anyone has already made a post about this before, but I just stumbled upon this app made specifically for when you’ve gone into a nonverbal anxiety attack!!!
it was made by Jeroen De Busser who is an autistic computer science student.
the app is really easy to use! all you do is open it and hand your phone to someone you need to communicate with during an attack but physically cannot, and it shows this cool little alert for the person to read, and then it takes them to an easy to use chat (that looks a lot like texting! except both of you are communicating using the same device). 
the alert message is completely customizable and you can have it say whatever you need! 
the app is called Emergency Chat and it’s available in the Apple Store and google play store. 
I highly recommend it to anyone who might need it :)

OH MY GOD?!?!?? BOOST

That’s so bootiful!

thank you so much for this because i never know what to do when i cant talk to people and they just start trying to ask me questions and its really hard to force myself to say i cant talk and stuff. im definately getting this right now


WHAT?

sweetandsavageautistic: thathumanwiththecatears: kuroba101: sweet-and-tender: lesbiandana: hello! I don’t know if anyone has already mad...

Bitch, Children, and Fall: arianod: rainbowbarnacle: alexander-lamington: gallusrostromegalus: jhaernyl: botanyshitposts: spirit-of-science: thebloggerbloggerfun: teafortrouble: eteo: fall-for-nothing: trickster-eridan: buttpilgrim: scientificperfection: kittiesinthemorning: I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟ it’s back Satan lemon every villain is lemons And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit. And now: The Weather. This kind of looks like a Buddha’s hand to me they’re a type of Citron, a citrus closely related to lemons. I wonder if whatever causes that twistedness in Buddha’s hands is present but dormant/recessive in other citruses? @botanyshitposts do you know about this? a lot of people having been messaging me about this, and honestly i had no idea that Buddha’s hands existed and it totally seems likely to me??? like honestly that seems like a really plausible explanation, especially because when we look at the demon fruit, the twisty ‘arms’ are going off in all different directions when the only place i can see a twisty arm happening on a lemon is on the top. like if the fruit is developing from the original growth point into a body then why are the offshoots developing the opposite way, from a body into a twisty thing? when in a Buddha’s hand, it totally makes sense because the twisty things are growing outward anyway.  im no pomologist but the similarities in the growth patterns really do reflect in The Demon Fruit.  @gallusrostromegalus WAIT I KNOW THIS ONE! The short version is that Citrus is a slutty, slutty genus of plants that can knock up pretty much any other member of the genus and uh… it’s mots recent relative as of 7 million years ago, becuase why not. Usually that makes for tasty children like tangerines and whatnot, but sometimes Weird Shit happens. All modern citrus are descended from Mandrin oranges, Pumelos and Etrogs, the latter being closest to lemons and which looks like this: It’s big and lumpy and mostly pith but also tasty as hell so Ye Ancient Malay Archipeligo Orchard Guy gets to breeding these for more tasty innards, presumable inventing lemonade in the process.  YAMAOG also finds out that it’s REALLY easy to seriously mess with the overall appearence of the fruit of these very inbred etrogs, and starts breeding all kinds of nonsense, like Bhudda’s palms, Modern Lemons and Grapefruit. YAMAOG also noticed that in addition to the occasional ugly inbred mule child, you can also get really strange looking fruit if the tree gets sick, is malnourished, if any part of the flower is damaged, or if the weather just sucks that year.  In addition to being a Major Slut, Citrus is also a Fussy Bitch. Looking at the Demon Fruit, my best guesses are If you’ve had weird-shaped fruits off that tree before, you might have a very strange hybrid tree like the dachsund-pitbull one of my neighbors owns. If it’s only the one fruit, and your tree is producing otherwise normal lemons, that particular flower or branch took some kind of damage or had a viral infection, which fucked up all the hormones and hence your lemon has gone all Ending-Of-Akira on you. GOOD NEWS FOR BOTH SCENARIOS: unless the fruit looks like it’s actually rotting, it’s safe to eat!  weird fruit shapes in lemons pretty much never makes them dangerous, just maybe a bit more tart than usual. Enjoy a nice glass of demonfruit juice! @motorizedduck relevant
Bitch, Children, and Fall: arianod:

rainbowbarnacle:

alexander-lamington:

gallusrostromegalus:

jhaernyl:

botanyshitposts:


spirit-of-science:

thebloggerbloggerfun:

teafortrouble:

eteo:

fall-for-nothing:

trickster-eridan:

buttpilgrim:

scientificperfection:

kittiesinthemorning:

I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard

WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK

when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟

it’s back

Satan lemon

every villain is lemons

And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit.

And now: The Weather.

This kind of looks like a Buddha’s hand to me
they’re a type of Citron, a citrus closely related to lemons. I wonder if whatever causes that twistedness in Buddha’s hands is present but dormant/recessive in other citruses?

@botanyshitposts do you know about this?

a lot of people having been messaging me about this, and honestly i had no idea that Buddha’s hands existed and it totally seems likely to me??? like honestly that seems like a really plausible explanation, especially because when we look at the demon fruit, the twisty ‘arms’ are going off in all different directions when the only place i can see a twisty arm happening on a lemon is on the top. like if the fruit is developing from the original growth point into a body then why are the offshoots developing the opposite way, from a body into a twisty thing? when in a Buddha’s hand, it totally makes sense because the twisty things are growing outward anyway. 
im no pomologist but the similarities in the growth patterns really do reflect in The Demon Fruit. 


@gallusrostromegalus 

WAIT I KNOW THIS ONE!
The short version is that Citrus is a slutty, slutty genus of plants that can knock up pretty much any other member of the genus and uh… it’s mots recent relative as of 7 million years ago, becuase why not. Usually that makes for tasty children like tangerines and whatnot, but sometimes Weird Shit happens.
All modern citrus are descended from Mandrin oranges, Pumelos and Etrogs, the latter being closest to lemons and which looks like this:
It’s big and lumpy and mostly pith but also tasty as hell so Ye Ancient Malay Archipeligo Orchard Guy gets to breeding these for more tasty innards, presumable inventing lemonade in the process.  YAMAOG also finds out that it’s REALLY easy to seriously mess with the overall appearence of the fruit of these very inbred etrogs, and starts breeding all kinds of nonsense, like Bhudda’s palms, Modern Lemons and Grapefruit.
YAMAOG also noticed that in addition to the occasional ugly inbred mule child, you can also get really strange looking fruit if the tree gets sick, is malnourished, if any part of the flower is damaged, or if the weather just sucks that year.  In addition to being a Major Slut, Citrus is also a Fussy Bitch.
Looking at the Demon Fruit, my best guesses are
If you’ve had weird-shaped fruits off that tree before, you might have a very strange hybrid tree like the dachsund-pitbull one of my neighbors owns.
If it’s only the one fruit, and your tree is producing otherwise normal lemons, that particular flower or branch took some kind of damage or had a viral infection, which fucked up all the hormones and hence your lemon has gone all Ending-Of-Akira on you.
GOOD NEWS FOR BOTH SCENARIOS: unless the fruit looks like it’s actually rotting, it’s safe to eat!  weird fruit shapes in lemons pretty much never makes them dangerous, just maybe a bit more tart than usual.
Enjoy a nice glass of demonfruit juice!



@motorizedduck

relevant

arianod: rainbowbarnacle: alexander-lamington: gallusrostromegalus: jhaernyl: botanyshitposts: spirit-of-science: thebloggerbloggerf...

Cheating, Children, and Energy: Ghetto Queen @_zolarmoon My sister has a whole homework packet & only did 1 pg... I asked her why & she said cus her class in a group chat & everyone does 1 page GIF 8130/17 8:11 AM cop-disliker69: zvaigzdelasas: hundondestiny: hearts-pearls: jehovahhthickness: melonmemes: We’re in 2017 but The Class of 2018 in 3018 Ok but this is even better this works for classes that arent prerequisites, or homework that wont come in a test. imagine not doing your algebra homework, and passing with a to calculus.  It’s not a matter of “not doing” the homework. You’re sharing the load for the same assignments, which means everyone gets to work through 1 thing on their own and then they can look over and learn from what the other students have done. Sharing homework isn’t the same as just cheating off a test, bc you still have to process homework as you’re doing it, and for some people it helps to know that what they’re doing is the right steps because then it’s easier to remember. Unlike traditional homework standards, where you turn it in and don’t know if it’s right until some time after, by which time you’ve already internalized your way of doing it, and if that’s wrong you have to retrain yourself. Which takes far more energy and really isn’t helpful. Especially when teachers will return grades as you’re taking another exam and shit. Also! You have other people’s grades somewhat reliant on you, which in-itself can b a motivating force Also! Homework is completely pointless and numerous studies have shown it doesn’t help learning at all. Schools with lots of homework, a little homework, and no homework at all do exactly the same on standardized tests. It’s a punishment and oppression that children are smart and morally right to attempt to evade by whatever means necessary.
Cheating, Children, and Energy: Ghetto Queen
 @_zolarmoon
 My sister has a whole homework
 packet & only did 1 pg...
 I asked her why & she said cus
 her class in a group chat &
 everyone does 1 page
 GIF
 8130/17 8:11 AM
cop-disliker69:
zvaigzdelasas:


hundondestiny:


hearts-pearls:

jehovahhthickness:

melonmemes:

We’re in 2017 but The Class of 2018 in 3018

Ok but this is even better 

this works for classes that arent prerequisites, or homework that wont come in a test. imagine not doing your algebra homework, and passing with a to calculus. 

It’s not a matter of “not doing” the homework. You’re sharing the load for the same assignments, which means everyone gets to work through 1 thing on their own and then they can look over and learn from what the other students have done. 
Sharing homework isn’t the same as just cheating off a test, bc you still have to process homework as you’re doing it, and for some people it helps to know that what they’re doing is the right steps because then it’s easier to remember. 
Unlike traditional homework standards, where you turn it in and don’t know if it’s right until some time after, by which time you’ve already internalized your way of doing it, and if that’s wrong you have to retrain yourself. Which takes far more energy and really isn’t helpful. Especially when teachers will return grades as you’re taking another exam and shit. 


Also! You have other people’s grades somewhat reliant on you, which in-itself can b a motivating force 


Also! Homework is completely pointless and numerous studies have shown it doesn’t help learning at all. Schools with lots of homework, a little homework, and no homework at all do exactly the same on standardized tests.
It’s a punishment and oppression that children are smart and morally right to attempt to evade by whatever means necessary.

cop-disliker69: zvaigzdelasas: hundondestiny: hearts-pearls: jehovahhthickness: melonmemes: We’re in 2017 but The Class of 2018 in 30...

Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO CRASH-LAND A PLANE ON WATER These instructions apply to small passenger propeller planes (not commercial airliners). 1 Take your place at the controls. If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your seat belt. 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call for help. There will be a control button on the yoke (the plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give your situation, destination, and plane call numbers (which should be printed on the top of the instru- ment panel). If you get no response, try again on the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the other end should be able to talk you through proper landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to talk you through the landing process, you will have to do it alone. beading airspeed indicator altimeter fuel gauge yoke throttle landing gear 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments. YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up, push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the nose of the plane should be about three inches below the horizon. ф awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills
Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO CRASH-LAND A PLANE ON WATER These instructions apply to small passenger propeller planes (not commercial airliners). 1 Take your place at the controls. If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your seat belt. 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call for help. There will be a control button on the yoke (the plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give your situation, destination, and plane call numbers (which should be printed on the top of the instru- ment panel). If you get no response, try again on the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the other end should be able to talk you through proper landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to talk you through the landing process, you will have to do it alone. beading airspeed indicator altimeter fuel gauge yoke throttle landing gear 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments. YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up, push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the nose of the plane should be about three inches below the horizon. ф awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills
Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

Tumblr, Blog, and Flickr: requiem-on-water: ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶C̶r̶e̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶P̶r̶o̶c̶e̶s̶s by N̶á̶d̶i̶a̶ ̶M̶a̶r̶i̶a
Tumblr, Blog, and Flickr: requiem-on-water:



̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶C̶r̶e̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶P̶r̶o̶c̶e̶s̶s by

N̶á̶d̶i̶a̶ ̶M̶a̶r̶i̶a

requiem-on-water: ̶T̶h̶e̶ ̶C̶r̶e̶a̶t̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶P̶r̶o̶c̶e̶s̶s by N̶á̶d̶i̶a̶ ̶M̶a̶r̶i̶a

Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO CRASH-LAND A PLANE ON WATER These instructions apply to small passenger propeller planes (not commercial airliners). 1 Take your place at the controls. If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your seat belt. 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call for help. There will be a control button on the yoke (the plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give your situation, destination, and plane call numbers (which should be printed on the top of the instru- ment panel). If you get no response, try again on the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the other end should be able to talk you through proper landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to talk you through the landing process, you will have to do it alone. beading airspeed indicator altimeter fuel gauge yoke throttle landing gear 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments. YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up, push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the nose of the plane should be about three inches below the horizon. ф awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills
Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO CRASH-LAND A PLANE ON WATER These instructions apply to small passenger propeller planes (not commercial airliners). 1 Take your place at the controls. If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your seat belt. 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call for help. There will be a control button on the yoke (the plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give your situation, destination, and plane call numbers (which should be printed on the top of the instru- ment panel). If you get no response, try again on the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the other end should be able to talk you through proper landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to talk you through the landing process, you will have to do it alone. beading airspeed indicator altimeter fuel gauge yoke throttle landing gear 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments. YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up, push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the nose of the plane should be about three inches below the horizon. ф awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills
Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO CRASH-LAND A PLANE ON WATER These instructions apply to small passenger propeller planes (not commercial airliners). 1 Take your place at the controls. If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your seat belt. 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call for help. There will be a control button on the yoke (the plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give your situation, destination, and plane call numbers (which should be printed on the top of the instru- ment panel). If you get no response, try again on the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the other end should be able to talk you through proper landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to talk you through the landing process, you will have to do it alone. beading airspeed indicator altimeter fuel gauge yoke throttle landing gear 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments. YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up, push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the nose of the plane should be about three inches below the horizon. ф awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills
Being Alone, Radio, and The Worst: |HOW TO
 CRASH-LAND
 A PLANE ON WATER
 These instructions apply to small passenger propeller
 planes (not commercial airliners).
 1 Take your place at the controls.
 If the plane has dual controls, the pilot will be in the
 left seat. Sit on the right. If the plane has only one
 set of controls and the pilot is unconscious, remove
 the pilot from the pilot's seat. Securely fasten your
 seat belt.
 2 Put on the radio headset (if there is one) and call
 for help.
 There will be a control button on the yoke (the
 plane's steering wheel) or a CB-like microphone on
 the instrument panel. Depress the button to talk
 release it to listen. Say "Mayday! Mayday!" and give
 your situation, destination, and plane call numbers
 (which should be printed on the top of the instru-
 ment panel). If you get no response, try again on
 the emergency channel, 121.5. The person on the
 other end should be able to talk you through proper
 landing procedures. If you cannot reach someone to
 talk you through the landing process, you will have
 to do it alone.

 beading
 airspeed indicator
 altimeter
 fuel gauge
 yoke
 throttle
 landing gear
 3 Get your bearings and identify the instruments.
 YOKE. This is the steering wheel, and it should be in
 front of you. The yoke turns the plane and controls its
 pitch. Pull back on the column to bring the nose up,
 push forward to point it down. Turn it left to turn the
 plane left, turn it right to turn the plane right. The
 yoke is very sensitive-move it only an inch or two in
 either direction to turn the plane. While cruising, the
 nose of the plane should be about three inches below
 the horizon.
 ф
awesomage:

The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

awesomage: The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: Man Skills

Animals, Desperate, and Dogs: Clifford the Big Red Dog by Sandara OH MY GOD Can we have a Clifford live action movie? Not a kids movie either Like, Emily Elizabeth's parents are working for a government agency developing a super soldier serum. None of their testing is working and they start testing the serum on larger mammals in hopes of seeing better results. They inject a variety of animals, including a dog. Nothing. They are desperate and on the verge of having their project shut down when they notice one of the test dogs is pregnant. It gives birth and they bring one of the puppies home for their daughter To their shock, the puppy they brought home starts to grow at an incredible rate, its fur mutating into a brilliant red as it does so. They are ecstatic because their research has finally seen a result, albeit one they weren't expecting. There is only one problem. Clifford has become attached to Emily and refuses to leave her side Emily, too, has fallen in love with her new pet. They decide to let their project be canceled rather than try to separate the two. Unfortunately the government discovers their secret and begins a campaign to retrieve Clifford at any costs. During the initial conflict, Emily Elizabeth's parents are killed trying to help her and Clifford escape Emily and her dog flee into the wild. This sets the opening of the movie Over the course of the movie, Emily and Clifford are on the run and we see Emily grow into a young woman, everything about her honed into a survivalist expert. She and Clifford roam the backwoods constantly in fear of being captured. On one of her rare trips into town one day, Emily witnesses a bank robbery in progress involving multiple hostages. She calls Clifford and the two of them save the lives of the hostages but wreck the bank in the process. The local news capture footage of Clifford and it isn't long before the military arrives in town. Emily wants to just run away again, but she sees that the military is destroying the town, driving people out of their homes and destroying property in their search. She decides that enough is enough and rides Clifford back into town and fights the military. Amidst the fighting a huge truck arrives. A general (who was her parent's superior officer) gets out and smirks. He tells Emily Elizabeth that Clifford's mother wasn't the only animal that gave birth to a litter of babies after receiving an injection. The back of the truck unfolds to reveal a massive tabby cat. The cat strains against its bindings and tears free, immediately leaping onto a nearby group of soldiers and devouring them. Emily is horrified and orders Clifford to attack What follows is the dramatic battle between Clifford and the mutant cat. Clifford has strength, but the cat is too fast and agile. It looks like Clifford is down for the count, when the townstfolk, recognizing that Clifford is on their side, come to his aid. They distract the cat long enough for him to finish the beast off for good The military retreats, the general swearing vengeance on the two of them, and Emily and Clifford ride off into the night once more But the legend of the big red dog has already started. And Emily Elizabeth knows that the day will come when she and Clifford will need to ride into battle against the forces of evil once more The credits roll. Post credits, the screen fades to black for a moment. The sound of waves crashing on shore fills the air. The screen flashes brilliant white. The light of the lighthouse moves on, revealing a rocky shore on a rainy day. The camera pans down to find Clifford and Emily gazing out to sea. A massive object hangs in the air off the coast, obscured in the clouds. A smaller object rapidly approaches them. It resolves itself into an advanced helicopter that silently lands just down the shore from them. Clifford lets out a low growl but Emily quiets him with a hand on his leg. A lone figure emerges from the aircraft, huddling his arms around himself to fight off the cold He approaches the two. His hair is short and somewhat curly. He wears glasses and a grey flannel shirt and seems unlikely to pose a threat to the two. "Emily Elizabeth," he says over the sound of the crashing surf, worked with your parents. It's taken us a while to find you, after the Birdwell Island incident. "And who exactly is 'us'," she responds, eyes narrowing suspiciously Ignoring her question, the man continues. "Me and Clifford have a lot in common, actually" He smiles a little awkwardly, then presses on. was hoping you might be interested in meeting my boss. He's fairly excited to talk with you." "You still haven't answered my question. Who are you and who do you work for?" The man smiles. "My name is Banner. And I'm hear to talk to you about the Avengers Initiative. VIA THEMETAPICTURE.COM lolzandtrollz:Big Red Dog
Animals, Desperate, and Dogs: Clifford the Big Red Dog by Sandara
 OH MY GOD
 Can we have a Clifford live action movie? Not a kids movie either
 Like, Emily Elizabeth's parents are working for a government agency
 developing a super soldier serum. None of their testing is working and
 they start testing the serum on larger mammals in hopes of seeing
 better results. They inject a variety of animals, including a dog.
 Nothing. They are desperate and on the verge of having their project
 shut down when they notice one of the test dogs is pregnant. It gives
 birth and they bring one of the puppies home for their daughter
 To their shock, the puppy they brought home starts to grow at an
 incredible rate, its fur mutating into a brilliant red as it does so. They
 are ecstatic because their research has finally seen a result, albeit
 one they weren't expecting. There is only one problem.
 Clifford has become attached to Emily and refuses to leave her side
 Emily, too, has fallen in love with her new pet. They decide to let their
 project be canceled rather than try to separate the two. Unfortunately
 the government discovers their secret and begins a campaign to
 retrieve Clifford at any costs. During the initial conflict, Emily
 Elizabeth's parents are killed trying to help her and Clifford escape
 Emily and her dog flee into the wild. This sets the opening of the
 movie
 Over the course of the movie, Emily and Clifford are on the run and
 we see Emily grow into a young woman, everything about her honed
 into a survivalist expert. She and Clifford roam the backwoods
 constantly in fear of being captured. On one of her rare trips into town
 one day, Emily witnesses a bank robbery in progress involving multiple
 hostages. She calls Clifford and the two of them save the lives of the
 hostages but wreck the bank in the process. The local news capture
 footage of Clifford and it isn't long before the military arrives in town.
 Emily wants to just run away again, but she sees that the military is
 destroying the town, driving people out of their homes and destroying
 property in their search. She decides that enough is enough and rides
 Clifford back into town and fights the military. Amidst the fighting a
 huge truck arrives. A general (who was her parent's superior officer)
 gets out and smirks. He tells Emily Elizabeth that Clifford's mother
 wasn't the only animal that gave birth to a litter of babies after
 receiving an injection. The back of the truck unfolds to reveal a
 massive tabby cat. The cat strains against its bindings and tears free,
 immediately leaping onto a nearby group of soldiers and devouring
 them. Emily is horrified and orders Clifford to attack
 What follows is the dramatic battle between Clifford and the mutant
 cat. Clifford has strength, but the cat is too fast and agile. It looks like
 Clifford is down for the count, when the townstfolk, recognizing that
 Clifford is on their side, come to his aid. They distract the cat long
 enough for him to finish the beast off for good
 The military retreats, the general swearing vengeance on the two of
 them, and Emily and Clifford ride off into the night once more But the
 legend of the big red dog has already started. And Emily Elizabeth
 knows that the day will come when she and Clifford will need to ride
 into battle against the forces of evil once more
 The credits roll.
 Post credits, the screen fades to black for a moment. The sound of
 waves crashing on shore fills the air. The screen flashes brilliant white.
 The light of the lighthouse moves on, revealing a rocky shore on a
 rainy day. The camera pans down to find Clifford and Emily gazing out
 to sea. A massive object hangs in the air off the coast, obscured in
 the clouds. A smaller object rapidly approaches them. It resolves itself
 into an advanced helicopter that silently lands just down the shore
 from them. Clifford lets out a low growl but Emily quiets him with a
 hand on his leg. A lone figure emerges from the aircraft, huddling his
 arms around himself to fight off the cold
 He approaches the two. His hair is short and somewhat curly. He
 wears glasses and a grey flannel shirt and seems unlikely to pose a
 threat to the two.
 "Emily Elizabeth," he says over the sound of the crashing surf,
 worked with your parents. It's taken us a while to find you, after the
 Birdwell Island incident.
 "And who exactly is 'us'," she responds, eyes narrowing suspiciously
 Ignoring her question, the man continues. "Me and Clifford have a lot
 in common, actually" He smiles a little awkwardly, then presses on.
 was hoping you might be interested in meeting my boss. He's fairly
 excited to talk with you."
 "You still haven't answered my question. Who are you and who do you
 work for?"
 The man smiles. "My name is Banner. And I'm hear to talk to you
 about the Avengers Initiative.
 VIA THEMETAPICTURE.COM
lolzandtrollz:Big Red Dog

lolzandtrollz:Big Red Dog

Complex, Crime, and Family: clever name @Luge_Knight The media when a black man shoplifts bread to feed his daughter vs when a white man murders family and dissolves them in acid 16/03/2017, 21:55 FOX 47 Madison fox47madison 2 people suspected of stealing 90 cans of baby formula from Walmart. bit.ly/211jhjS WGN TV News @WGNNews NE EWS St. Charles man killed daughters before telling wife to 'live and suffer' bit.ly/ 2mLWjkf 15/03/2017, 04:06 critically-yours: avd-justin: lagonegirl: i’m speechless This is how the system of white supremacy  operates. The media is used 2 create stereotypes like blk on blk crime.They need black men to fill jail cells for the Prison Indstrial complex You know what? I’m tired of this.I do not know what exactly they are waiting for. I mean our government comes up with “reasons” to invade other countries, such as Syria, like their government is allegedly violating human rights or something like that. but… I mean for other countries, they do not even have to go deep to bomb the fuck out of this place, they can just look at our media. And this has been happening to people of color since the media has existed. I’ll never forget this 👇🏾 Did a research project on this in undergrad and the results are extremely alarming because it’s not just in imagery, it’s in language used even in the law making process and within our own communities in a completely different way than expected. This post is too real and needs a gazillion bazillion more notes.
Complex, Crime, and Family: clever name
 @Luge_Knight
 The media when a black man shoplifts
 bread to feed his daughter vs when a
 white man murders family and dissolves
 them in acid
 16/03/2017, 21:55

 FOX 47 Madison
 fox47madison
 2 people suspected of stealing
 90 cans of baby formula from
 Walmart. bit.ly/211jhjS

 WGN TV News
 @WGNNews
 NE
 EWS
 St. Charles man killed daughters before
 telling wife to 'live and suffer' bit.ly/
 2mLWjkf
 15/03/2017, 04:06
critically-yours:

avd-justin:

lagonegirl:



i’m speechless


This is how the system of white supremacy  operates. The media is used 2 create stereotypes like blk on blk crime.They need black men to fill jail cells for the Prison Indstrial complex 
You know what? I’m tired of this.I do not know what exactly they are waiting for. I mean our government comes up with “reasons” to invade other countries, such as Syria, like their government is allegedly violating human rights or something like that. but… I mean for other countries, they do not even have to go deep to bomb the fuck out of this place, they can just look at our media. And this has been happening to people of color since the media has existed.

 
I’ll never forget this
👇🏾




Did a research project on this in undergrad and the results are extremely alarming because it’s not just in imagery, it’s in language used even in the law making process and within our own communities in a completely different way than expected.


This post is too real and needs a gazillion bazillion more notes.

critically-yours: avd-justin: lagonegirl: i’m speechless This is how the system of white supremacy  operates. The media is used 2 cre...