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Alive, Anaconda, and Animals: i-should-be-writing-rn: inlovewithaleheather: thecuckoohaslanded: gerbthenerd: alexander-lamington: thelizardprincess: biglawbear: blacksirencry: swaglexander-the-great: #That’s a#That’s a blue ringed octopus#You’re going to die do you realise that#It is literally one of the most deadly animals in the world#Not just in Australia or just in the ocean in THE WORLD#Put it DOWN#And go to a hospital jfc via platonic-rabbit  me tryna find out if this fool died “The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.” Holy shit And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!! Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this #AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS  I mean OP pretty much covered it.  A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. But ask and you shall receive,  On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD.  YOU’RE DEAD.  EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN. There are many things that will kill you. [citation needed] There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST. There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in. Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you).  THE. WHOLE. OCEAN. Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus. It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these.  But not without immediate medical attention.  Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish. The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you.  There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide.  It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis.  It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly.  It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm.  Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the LD50 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)).  This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you. DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS. Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE. A cone snail walks into a bar.  You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND. Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra.  Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin.  Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it.  Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough. I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin: “Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.” “The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.” Remember how the LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg?  Conotoxin is 160 times more potent.  FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.   I DID SOME MATH.   IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.) Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.” THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY. And guess what?  Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging.  Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you.  Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight.  Oh no.  It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON.  It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria. Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever.  “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask.  And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra.  Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.”  That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine. Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin.  In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock.  BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE. IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off.  And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST. And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death. Don’t touch the pretty shells. I’ve never been so intrigued to learn how easily I could be fucking exterminated from existence by the overpowered sea creatures of the world. You’ve done a better job at keeping my attention then any of my teachers ever have. You know what I’m putting this on the writing blog cause I personally can see potential in some fantasy villain attempting to weaponise cone snailsIn which case, all hail snail king 🐌
Alive, Anaconda, and Animals: i-should-be-writing-rn:

inlovewithaleheather:

thecuckoohaslanded:


gerbthenerd:

alexander-lamington:


thelizardprincess:


biglawbear:


blacksirencry:

swaglexander-the-great:


#That’s a#That’s a blue ringed octopus#You’re going to die do you realise that#It is literally one of the most deadly animals in the world#Not just in Australia or just in the ocean in THE WORLD#Put it DOWN#And go to a hospital jfc via platonic-rabbit 
me tryna find out if this fool died


“The blue-ringed octopus, despite its small size, carries enough venom to kill twenty-six adult humans within minutes. Their bites are tiny and often painless, with many victims not realizing they have been envenomated until respiratory depression and paralysis start to set in.[8] No blue-ringed octopus antivenom is available yet, making it one of the deadliest reef inhabitants in the ocean.”
Holy shit


And this is why I don’t go in the ocean anymore


Also the blue rings literally only show up when it is distressed so this person has angered it!!! You are in danger friend!!!


Actually this guy keeps them as pets they’re on his instagram (william_exotique) and he frequently holds then and I just? Don’t know why? And also every picture or video he posts of them shows the blue rings so they’re always in distress I just do not understand why he’s doing this



#AMY EXPLAIN HOW DUMB THIS GUY IS 
I mean OP pretty much covered it.  A blue ringed octopus is almost on the level of CONE SNAIL on the list of things you ABSOLUTELY DO NOT PICK UP UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
But ask and you shall receive,  On this episode of “Fun Facts With Cuckoo,” DEAD.  YOU’RE DEAD.  EVERYTHING IS DEAD AND YOU SHOULD NEVER TOUCH ANYTHING IN THE OCEAN EVER AGAIN.
There are many things that will kill you.

[citation needed]
There are fewer, but still many things that will kill you FAST.
There are yet fewer things that kill you fast and by such an overwhelming margin of overkill that nervous laughter is our only solace in the dark of this terrible, surprisingly Lovecraftian world of unearthly horrors that we live in.
Of the things that I know about which will kill you fast via just plain insultingly potent venom, which is a not insignificant number of things because I know a not insignificant number of things, there are about 3 things in the ocean – IN THE WHOLE OCEAN – which are so insanely, mind-bogglingly deadly that there is pretty much no possible hope for survival (I mean you CAN, but god help you if you’re ever in that situation, because god’s just about damn near the only thing that CAN help you).  THE. WHOLE. OCEAN.
Those three things are the Irukandji (a tiny (1cm) species of box jellyfish, which has stingers not only on its tentacles but on its BELL, for reasons no one has definitively figured out, and is so toxic despite its size its sting can cause a severe brain hemorrhage), the cone snail (a group of carnivorous sea snails that is accepted to be the most venomous animals on earth, with a STUPIDLY fast acting and extremely powerful neurotoxin that has in at least one case killed a human ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, because the swimmer who found two beautiful shells (unfortunately cone snails tend to have very pretty shells which makes people want to pick them up) was holding them up for a picture and ended up being stabbed in the neck by not one but TWO cone snails at the same time, and it is believed that she was literally dead before she hit the ground, I mean LITERALLY in a 100% non-fictional and non-exaggerated way, in between the time the two cone snails stabbed her and the time her limp body hit the sand, she was not alive anymore), and the blue ringed octopus.
It is POSSIBLE to survive any of these.  But not without immediate medical attention.  Of these three, the Irukandji is by far the most treatable, because Australia and other coastal regions (including Florida and other parts of the US) are kind of experienced in dealing with box jellyfish.
The blue ringed octopus will fucking kill you.  There’s no antidote for their venom, ONE COMPONENT OF WHICH (tetrodotoxin) is 1200 times deadlier than cyanide.  It’s a powerful neurotoxin (most of the worst venoms are because the species that produce them need to kill or at least paralyze their prey quickly, like jellyfish whose fragile tentacles could be damaged if their food doesn’t stop struggling) that attacks the sodium channels and causes muscle paralysis.  It doesn’t necessarily kill you quickly.  It PARALYZES you quickly, so that you can’t really call for help or describe the problem, and you will probably end up slowly suffocating from a paralyzed diaphragm.  Tetrodotoxin can be metabolized by the body in a matter of hours, but it can also kill you in a matter of minutes if you get a lethal dose (which isn’t much, the 

LD50

 or median lethal dose, the dose at which you have a 50% chance of survival, is only 8 MICROGRAMS per kilogram of body weight (as tested in mice)).  This is, by venom standards, not a large amount, which means the animal that is capable of putting this venom inside your body is very very good at killing the absolute shit out of you.
DON’T TOUCH THE BLUE RINGED OCTOPUS.
Now, because overkill is my motto, let me briefly explain why Conus geographus is the undisputed champion of YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE, AND FURTHERMORE FUCK YOU FOR THINKING OTHERWISE.
A cone snail walks into a bar.  You’d expect the bartender to ask, “what’s your poison,” but they were paralyzed before they could ask and OH LOOK they’re already FUCKING DEAD ON THE GROUND.
Conus geographus is about 4-6 inches long and nature’s equivalent of Avada Kedavra.  Cone snails literally have their own KIND of toxins named after them: conotoxin.  Not only is there no antidote, but their venom AGGRESSIVELY RESISTS our ability to find a cure, because we barely understand how it works AND conotoxins are so internally varied, even within a single species, that any one antidote isn’t going to help because they’re constantly mutating and evolving their venom to prevent their prey from evolving a resistance to it.  Plus their venom is like, a bunch of different venoms all at once JUST IN CASE any one of them wasn’t good enough.
I want you to read these two sentences from the wiki page on conotoxin:
“Conotoxins have a variety of mechanisms of actions, most of which have not been determined.”


“The LD50 of conotoxin is 50 ng/kg.”
Remember how the 

LD50 of tetrodotoxin is 8μg/kg?  Conotoxin is 160 times more potent.  FIFTY NANOGRAMS PER KILOGRAM HAS A 50% CHANCE OF KILLING YOU. A 220-POUND HUMAN HAS A 50% CHANCE OF SURVIVAL AGAINST JUST 5 MICROGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN.  
I DID SOME MATH.  
IT WOULD TAKE 7-9 MILLIGRAMS OF CONOTOXIN TO KILL A BLUE WHALE, THE HEAVIEST ANIMAL TO EVER LIVE. (based on weight estimates from 300-400,000 lbs.)
Conus geographus is so fucking deadly that “In two cases of envenomation, only 0.0002-0.0005 mg resulted in severe paralysis.”
THIS THING KILLS STUFF SO HARD THAT BEFORE YOU HEAR THE FIRST “MORTAL KOMBAT” IN THE MORTAL KOMBAT THEME, THERE’S PROBABLY ALREADY BEEN A FATALITY.
And guess what?  Cone snails don’t do that NOOB SHIT with the superficial biting or stinging.  Your wetsuit or gloves won’t protect you.  Because homeboy didn’t bring teeth to evolution’s knife fight.  Oh no.  It brought a motherfucking radula POISON HARPOON.  It’s lightning fast and has way more piercing power than some silly little cnidocytes or salivary bacteria.
Another component of their venom is being researched for its potential as a pain reliever.  “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????” you might reasonably ask.  And you would be right to do so, because science has gone too far and has surely sinned against the very image of Mollusca Kedavra.  Well, it turns out the answer is “Research shows that certain component proteins of the venom target specific human pain receptors and can be up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine without morphine’s addictive properties and side-effects.”  That’s right, the part of their venom that SPECIFICALLY DOESN’T HURT YOU is up to 10,000 times more potent than morphine.
Also, Conus geographus (along with one other cone snail species, C. tulipa) is the only known non-human animal to weaponize insulin.  In addition to the normal insulin that the snails produce for their own use, their bodies manufacture an ADDITIONAL insulin molecule that is similar to the kind produced in fish (which they eat) for the sole purpose of stunning their prey through hypoglycemic shock.  BECAUSE APPARENTLY THEY DON’T FEEL LIKE THEY’D KILL YOU HARD ENOUGH OTHERWISE.
IF you are going to survive the ALMIGHTY CONE SNAIL, WHO KNOWS NO FEAR, TRIUMPHANT HEDGEMON OF THE MOLECULAR ARMS RACE, TRUE BORN HEIR TO THE SCYTHE OF DEATH ITSELF, FISHSLAYER, GOD AMONG MOLLUSKS, WHOSE WRATH IS MERCIFUL ONLY IN ITS BREVITY, ADMIRABLE IN ITS BEAUTY AND UNSULLIED BY THE UNWORTHY TOUCH OF MORTAL HANDS OR SCALES OR REALLY ANYTHING IN RANGE OF ITS RADULA HARPOON, then literally the only thing that’s going to save you is for you to be kept alive artificially (externalizing your respiratory functions to force your body to continue breathing, basically) until the effects of the venom wear off.  And because of how quickly this venom acts, you need to get that medical attention VERY, VERY FAST.
And if you don’t get it, you will still be conscious while the paralysis slowly suffocates you to death.
Don’t touch the pretty shells.


I’ve never been so intrigued to learn how easily I could be fucking exterminated from existence by the overpowered sea creatures of the world. You’ve done a better job at keeping my attention then any of my teachers ever have.


You know what I’m putting this on the writing blog cause I personally can see potential in some fantasy villain attempting to weaponise cone snailsIn which case, all hail snail king 🐌

i-should-be-writing-rn: inlovewithaleheather: thecuckoohaslanded: gerbthenerd: alexander-lamington: thelizardprincess: biglawbear: ...

Children, Family, and Friends: diana @xoprettypeonies Follow I am disgusted. .. T-Mobile Wi-Fi 3:10 PM 0 www.pedimom.com We were sitting on the floor of the bathroom watching YouTube Kids to distract him from the bleed, when I saw it. It was a simple, innocent cartoon until it happened. Four minutes and forty-five seconds into the video, a man quickly walked onto the screen, held his arm out, and taught the children watching this video how to properly kill themselves. What did I just see? Did I really just see that? I immediately turned off the video. My son's nose stopped bleeding, and I further investigated the video in private while he went to play. I watched it again, certain that I had dreamt it up. I know YouTube had some sick videos, but I thought YouTube Kids was safe. They sure make it seem like it is. But no. There it was again. Four minutes and forty-five seconds into the video. The man quickly walked in, held his arm out, and tracing I T-Mobile Wi-Fi 3:11 PM 19% 0 www.pedimom.com But - no. There it was again. Four minutes and forty-five seconds into the video. The man quickly walked in, held his arm out, and tracing his forearm, said, "Kids, remember, cut this way for attention, and this way for results," and then quickly walked off. Not much shocks me. I'm a physician, I work in the emergency department. I've seen a lot. But this did. This video was intentionally planted on YouTube Kids to harm our children. He waited until parents' guards were down, thinking their kids were just watching a harmless cartoon when he made his entrance four minutes and forty-five seconds into this video. How can anyone do this? How can YouTube Kids trick parents into thinking their content is safe? T-Mobile Wi-Fi 3:11 PM 0 www.pedimom.com How can YouTube Kids trick parents into thinking their content is safe? What else do our children seen on these apps? I reported the video and asked my friends and family to report. Hours later though, it is still up, and I wonder how many children have seen this video since. Those apps are all now deleted and will never return to our household. I am disturbed, I am saddened, I am disgusted. But I am also relieved that I was there to see this video with my own eyes, so that I could take the appropriate actions to protect my family. I would recommend everyone reading this to take these same steps as well. Today I was grateful for my son's nosebleed. UPDATE: PediMom was able to get this particular video removed from YouTube Kids therefore it is no longer ahle tn he viewed This Majesty Ria Followv @ToriNicksWho ATTENTION: Do not leave your children unsupervised with YouTube. I've heard a lot about these type of videos that seem nnocent & are marketed towards children.. but have perverted imagery & messages in them that are imprinted into your childrens subconscious mind. stay woke .: diana + @xoprettypeonies I am disgusted. 12:45 PM-4 Feb 2019 13,460 Retweets17,625 Likes
Children, Family, and Friends: diana
 @xoprettypeonies
 Follow
 I am disgusted.

 ..
 T-Mobile Wi-Fi
 3:10 PM
 0 www.pedimom.com
 We were sitting on the floor of the bathroom
 watching YouTube Kids to distract him from the
 bleed, when I saw it.
 It was a simple, innocent cartoon until it
 happened.
 Four minutes and forty-five seconds into the
 video, a man quickly walked onto the screen,
 held his arm out, and taught the children
 watching this video how to properly kill
 themselves. What did I just see? Did I really just
 see that? I immediately turned off the video. My
 son's nose stopped bleeding, and I further
 investigated the video in private while he went to
 play. I watched it again, certain that I had
 dreamt it up. I know YouTube had some sick
 videos, but I thought YouTube Kids was safe.
 They sure make it seem like it is.
 But no. There it was again. Four minutes and
 forty-five seconds into the video. The man
 quickly walked in, held his arm out, and tracing

 I T-Mobile Wi-Fi
 3:11 PM
 19%
 0 www.pedimom.com
 But - no. There it was again. Four minutes and
 forty-five seconds into the video. The man
 quickly walked in, held his arm out, and tracing
 his forearm, said, "Kids, remember, cut this way
 for attention, and this way for results," and then
 quickly walked off.
 Not much shocks me. I'm a physician, I work in
 the emergency department. I've seen a lot.
 But this did.
 This video was intentionally planted on YouTube
 Kids to harm our children. He waited until
 parents' guards were down, thinking their kids
 were just watching a harmless cartoon when he
 made his entrance four minutes and forty-five
 seconds into this video.
 How can anyone do this?
 How can YouTube Kids trick parents into thinking
 their content is safe?

 T-Mobile Wi-Fi
 3:11 PM
 0 www.pedimom.com
 How can YouTube Kids trick parents into thinking
 their content is safe?
 What else do our children seen on these apps?
 I reported the video and asked my friends and
 family to report. Hours later though, it is still
 up, and I wonder how many children have seen
 this video since. Those apps are all now deleted
 and will never return to our household.
 I am disturbed, I am saddened, I am disgusted.
 But I am also relieved that I was there to see
 this video with my own eyes, so that I could take
 the appropriate actions to protect my family. I
 would recommend everyone reading this to take
 these same steps as well.
 Today I was grateful for my son's nosebleed.
 UPDATE: PediMom was able to get this
 particular video removed from YouTube Kids
 therefore it is no longer ahle tn he viewed This

 Majesty Ria
 Followv
 @ToriNicksWho
 ATTENTION: Do not leave your children
 unsupervised with YouTube. I've heard a lot
 about these type of videos that seem
 nnocent & are marketed towards children..
 but have perverted imagery & messages in
 them that are imprinted into your childrens
 subconscious mind. stay woke
 .: diana + @xoprettypeonies
 I am disgusted.
 12:45 PM-4 Feb 2019
 13,460 Retweets17,625 Likes
Click, Fucking, and Funny: N THE text in MSPa Do r rotate omegapausestuck: koobaxion: alphaplayfree: alienpapacy: you ever see an image and think “i may see something as funny as this again, but never anything funnier” ALL RIGHT YOU LITTLE SHITS GET READY TO LEARN SOMETHING yOU WANNA ROTATE TEXT?! well mod 5ider has got the fucking t r i c k s homie Step one: Type something. P E R F E C T. sTEP TWO: FIND THE RESIZE OPTION. You see that little resize button on your menu? Yeah, that’s the one. you can just click that shit! On older versions of MS Paint there isn’t this option, but you can always find it with a quick right-click. THERE IT FUCKING IS!!!!!  STEP THREE: STRETCH AND SKEW When you click resize, this menu comes up. I’m sure you all have seen this menu before, but for those who don’t, I’ll clue you in. The top options control the length and respective width of your artwork. you can choose to alter them separately, or all together Using that little “Maintain Aspect Ration” checkbox there, but that’s not important right now. wHat we’re focusing on is that skew option on the botttom. with that you can t i l t whatever image yuo have on your screen to the left to the right up and down. “BUT 5IDER!!!!!” you say, “THAT DOESN’T LOOK ROTATED AT ALL” wELL HOLD ON TO YOUR LUG NUTS BECAUSE I T ’ S T I M E F O R STEP 4: ULTRA COMBOOOOOOOO!!!!! now, comes the fun part. unlike its aspect ratio locked cousin, the stretch and skew options work independently from one another. So, you can do things like  and But that’s neither here nor there… what gets REALLY interesting is when your ratios are in opposite directions.. HOME RUN! Now, before I let you go, I found out through trial and error that an angle doesn’t exactly match up with its negative dimension… (Step 5: Angular ratios) See? there’s a little offset between vertical and horizontal if your expect your text to appear natural instead of tilted. The only places that this offset reaches zero is at 90° (of course) and the rare and extremely dangerous 45° rotations. Fortunately, I’ve already mapped out a few angles that I find are very useful in my works so, for your viewing pleasure… i present my handy dandy graph All you have to do is match up your desired angle up to its respective complement and you have quickly and efficiently rotated your first word in MS Paint. Have fun! You know, you guys really seemed to enjoy this post. Should I do more MS Paint tutorials in the future?
Click, Fucking, and Funny: N THE
 text in MSPa
 Do r rotate
omegapausestuck:

koobaxion:

alphaplayfree:

alienpapacy:

you ever see an image and think “i may see something as funny as this again, but never anything funnier”

ALL RIGHT YOU LITTLE SHITS GET READY TO LEARN SOMETHING
yOU WANNA ROTATE TEXT?! well mod 5ider has got the fucking t r i c k s homie
Step one: Type something.
P E R F E C T.
sTEP TWO: FIND THE RESIZE OPTION.
You see that little resize button on your menu?
Yeah, that’s the one. you can just click that shit!
On older versions of MS Paint there isn’t this option, but you can always find it with a quick right-click.
THERE IT FUCKING IS!!!!!
 STEP THREE: STRETCH AND SKEW
When you click resize, this menu comes up.
I’m sure you all have seen this menu before, but for those who don’t, I’ll clue you in. The top options control the length and respective width of your artwork. you can choose to alter them separately,
or all together
Using that little “Maintain Aspect Ration” checkbox there, but that’s not important right now.
wHat we’re focusing on is that skew option on the botttom.
with that you can t i l t whatever image yuo have on your screen to the left
to the right
up
and down.
“BUT 5IDER!!!!!” you say, “THAT DOESN’T LOOK ROTATED AT ALL”
wELL HOLD ON TO YOUR LUG NUTS BECAUSE I T ’ S T I M E F O R
STEP 4: ULTRA COMBOOOOOOOO!!!!!
now, comes the fun part. unlike its aspect ratio locked cousin, the stretch and skew options work independently from one another. So, you can do things like 
and
But that’s neither here nor there… what gets REALLY interesting is when your ratios are in opposite directions..
HOME RUN!
Now, before I let you go, I found out through trial and error that an angle doesn’t exactly match up with its negative dimension…
(Step 5: Angular ratios)
See? there’s a little offset between vertical and horizontal if your expect your text to appear natural instead of tilted. The only places that this offset reaches zero is at 90° (of course) and the rare and extremely dangerous 45° rotations.
Fortunately, I’ve already mapped out a few angles that I find are very useful in my works so, for your viewing pleasure… i present my handy dandy graph
All you have to do is match up your desired angle up to its respective complement and you have quickly and efficiently rotated your first word in MS Paint.
Have fun!



You know, you guys really seemed to enjoy this post.
Should I do more MS Paint tutorials in the future?

omegapausestuck: koobaxion: alphaplayfree: alienpapacy: you ever see an image and think “i may see something as funny as this again, but...

Tumblr, Blog, and Http: lifepro-tips: Quickly becoming one of the busiest and hottest studio in NYC! FenixStudios.com
Tumblr, Blog, and Http: lifepro-tips:

Quickly becoming one of the busiest and hottest studio in NYC! 
FenixStudios.com

lifepro-tips: Quickly becoming one of the busiest and hottest studio in NYC! FenixStudios.com

Tumblr, Blog, and Http: lifepro-tips: Quickly becoming one of the busiest and hottest studio in NYC!  FenixStudios.com
Tumblr, Blog, and Http: lifepro-tips:

Quickly becoming one of the busiest and hottest studio in NYC! 


FenixStudios.com

lifepro-tips: Quickly becoming one of the busiest and hottest studio in NYC!  FenixStudios.com