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![School: sushinfood:
justamerplwithabox:
vivelafat:
prokopetz:
officialdeadparrot:
grellholmes:
elsajeni:
gunslingerannie:
justtkeepcalmm:
dean-and-his-pie:
fororchestra:
musicalmelody:
Fun Story: My director kept telling me and my tenor sax buddy to play softer. No matter what we did, it wasnât soft enough for him. So getting frustrated, I told my buddy âDont play this time. Just fake itâÂ
Our Band Director then informed us we sounded perfect.Â
To my readers: âpâ means quiet, âppâ means really quiet. Iâve never seen âppppâ before haha.
On the contrast, âfâ means loud, and âffffâ probably means so loud you go unconscious.
I had ffff in a piece once and my conductor told me to play as loudly as physically possible without falling off my chairâŚ
Me and my trombone buddies had âffffâ and he sat next to me and played so hard that he fell out of his chair.
The lengths we go for music.
Okay yeah so I play the bass clarinet and the amount of air you have to move and the stiffness of the reed means it only has two settings and that is loud and louder, with an optional LOUDEST that includes a 50% probability of HORRIBLE CROAKING NOISE which is the bass equivalent of the ubiquitous clarinet shriek.
One day, when I was in concert band in high school, we got a new piece handed out for the first time, and there was a strange little commotion back in the tuba section â whispering, and pointing at something in the music, and swatting at each otherâs hands all shhh donât call attention to it. And although they did attract the attention of basically everyone else in the band, they managed to avoid being noticed by the band director, who gave us a few minutes to look over our parts and then said, âAll right, letâs run through it up to section A.â
And here we are, cheerfully playing along, sounding reasonably competent â but everyone, when they have the attention to spare, is keeping an eye on the tuba players. They donât come in for the first eight measures or so, and then when they do come in, what we see is:
[stifled giggling]
[reeeeeeally deep breath]
[COLOSSAL FOGHORN NOISE]
The entire band stops dead, in the cacophonous kind of way that a band stops when it hasnât actually been cued to stop. The band director doesnât even say anything, just looks straight back at the tubas and makes a helpless sort of why gesture.
In unison, the tuba players defend themselves: âTHERE WERE FOUR FâS.â
FFFF is not really a rational dynamic marking for any instrument, but for the love of all that is holy why would you put it in a tuba part.
This is the best band postÂ
Everyone else go home
Oh man, so I play trombone, and we got this piece called Florentiner Marsch by Julius Fucik, and we saw this
which is 8 fortes. We were shocked until,
that is 24 fortes who the fuck does that
Who does that?
This guy. Take a good look - that is the moustache of a man with nothing to lose.
Julius IdontgivaFucik
More like Julius Fuckit
Pyrozodâs tags for this were too hilarious not to share](https://pics.ballmemes.com/sushinfood-justamerplwithabox-vivelafat-prokopetz-officialdeadparrot-grellholmes-elsajeni-gunslingerannie-justtkeepcalmm-dean-and-his-pie-69735260.png)
