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Head, Hungry, and Lazy: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark Usage: When you need to be brief, but you're not angry Example We need to talk The Sinceriod Usage When you want to break out of your cycnical shell and be truly honest with someone. Example: Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater is just what I wanted Sarcastises Usage The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when you want to be sarcastic, but in a way that's totally different and better from whatever system you're using now. Example: Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is just what I wanted. Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon Usage: If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods. Pretty much wherever you feel like it Eхample: Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything I'm a stain on humanity Andorpersand Usage: One simple symbol for "and/or" Example: Some people hate the very existence of the phrase "and/or, " but these people are uptight &o stupid Mockwotation Marks Usage: For quoting something that someone didn't say, but totally would say with the way they're being right now. The written equivalent of doing an impression of someone by saying "Look at me, I'm so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by your head, and speaking in a high-pitched voice. I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about being hungry but not offer any suggestions of my own, said Stacey. Collegelf Superellipsis Usage: For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some thunder crashing. Example: He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On the other side he found... more words! Collegelm Morgan Freemark Usage: Reminds readers that they can read words in any voice they want, so maybe they should read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice. Example: And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka and straight-up ran head-first into the wall you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks
Head, Hungry, and Lazy: The "I'm Not Angry" Mark
 Usage:
 When you need to be brief,
 but you're not angry
 Example
 We need to talk
 The Sinceriod
 Usage
 When you want to break out of your
 cycnical shell and be truly honest
 with someone.
 Example:
 Oh, wow, Thank you, This sweater
 is just what I wanted
 Sarcastises
 Usage
 The opposite of the sinceriod. Use when
 you want to be sarcastic, but in a way
 that's totally different and better from
 whatever system you're using now.
 Example:
 Oh, wow. Thank you. This sweater is
 just what I wanted.
 Hemi-Demi-Semi Colon
 Usage:
 If you don't know when it's appropriate to use a
 semi-colon, and you're too lazy to learn, you can use
 this in place of commas, semi-colons, and periods.
 Pretty much wherever you feel like it
 Eхample:
 Now I can act superior and avoid learning anything
 I'm a stain on humanity
 Andorpersand
 Usage:
 One simple symbol for "and/or"
 Example:
 Some people hate the very
 existence of the phrase "and/or, "
 but these people are uptight &o
 stupid
 Mockwotation Marks
 Usage:
 For quoting something that someone
 didn't say, but totally would say with the
 way they're being right now. The written
 equivalent of doing an impression of
 someone by saying "Look at me, I'm
 so-and-so" and wiggling your hands by
 your head, and speaking in a high-pitched
 voice.
 I'm Stacey. I'm going to complain about
 being hungry but not offer any suggestions
 of my own, said Stacey.
 Collegelf
 Superellipsis
 Usage:
 For an extreme dramatic pause. When you want the reader to
 wait a good 20 seconds before reading the next part of the
 sentence. Maybe even imagine the lights flickering and some
 thunder crashing.
 Example:
 He paused, cautiously, as he approached the superellipsis. On
 the other side he found... more words!
 Collegelm
 Morgan Freemark
 Usage:
 Reminds readers that they can read words in
 any voice they want, so maybe they should
 read these words in Morgan Freeman's voice.
 Example:
 And so, Kevin took this big swig of vodka
 and straight-up ran head-first into the wall
 you should probably go to TheMetaPicture.com
lolzandtrollz:

New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

lolzandtrollz: New And Necessary Punctuation Marks

A Dream, Saw, and Target: pfaerie:I had a dream where Jack saw everything in blue except Bitty - and everything Bitty touched would stain pink. I woke up before they turned everything purple :(
A Dream, Saw, and Target: pfaerie:I had a dream where Jack saw everything in blue except Bitty - and everything Bitty touched would stain pink. I woke up before they turned everything purple :(

pfaerie:I had a dream where Jack saw everything in blue except Bitty - and everything Bitty touched would stain pink. I woke up before they ...

Black, Can, and Name: ColDBEREWSTAIN If you stain a shirt, you can outline it in black sharpie and give it a name to make it seem like you visit islands!
Black, Can, and Name: ColDBEREWSTAIN
If you stain a shirt, you can outline it in black sharpie and give it a name to make it seem like you visit islands!

If you stain a shirt, you can outline it in black sharpie and give it a name to make it seem like you visit islands!

Alive, Bodies , and Brains: ilthat TIL that due to their small brains koalas are unable to perform complex, unfamiliar tasks such as eat leaves off of flat surfaces. via reddit.com toast-potent how are they even alive kickin-jeans eucalyptus trees are full of flammable oil that causes the trees to explode during forest fires, killing other trees and spreading its seeds to grow in their place koalas survive solely because nothing else in their environment Wants To Eat The Fucking Bombs humandisastersquad WROTE THIS POST#god dont get me fuckin started#the NUMBER of times ive Gone Off abt koalas in zooarch class#on a scale of koalas to wombats how good is ur marsupial at Being Alive#hey hey u know what else? koalas are s0 picky with their diet that theyll only eat the leaves of one (1) type of eucalypt#and even then ONLY specimens of that tree that are within a very tight geographic range of where the koala was born#the rescue centre in my city? they have to ship branches from all over the state bc koalas there physically Will Not Eat anything thats not#from their very very small very precise home range#theyd rather starve to death than try leaves from like the next suburb over#i have 60 other reasons why koalas spit in the face of natural selection hmu if you want YELLING i cant be bothered to list them all here#god theyre so incomprehensibly dumb. god#HEY ALSO the reason their brains are so small is bc YEah the one SINGLE species of tree they eat is incredibly toxic#their diet consists of 1 food and it is Brain-Shrinking Poison (@reyroace) reyroace oh u like that? try this one: the main natural cause of death in koalas is starvation, because 1) their dumbass teeth are SHIT. to be a herbivore and chomp cellulose all day u need some real tough grinders in there, and almost every other herbivore in nature has SOME sort of dental adaptation to make sure they dont run out of tooth by the time they hit middle age. horses have big tall teeth, wombat teeth grow forever, kangaroos have got a little conveyor belt system goin on, etc etc everyone's doin SOMETHING except fuckign koalas. idiots have tiny fuckin shortass normal teeth that do an okay job for maybe like 15 years and then wear down and leave them with ridiculous fuckin useless old man gums that do shit all. but thats fine bc all koalas do anyway is sit in trees and sleep 22hrs a day then wake up and scream and eat poison and they do this all day every day until they run out of teeth at which point they just fall out of the tree and die 2) idiots can't die any other fuckin way bc nothing in nature wants to eat them bc their bodies are chocker block with LITERAL poison. fuckin USELESS their flesh just sits around and slowly rots bc its too gross-tasting and toxic for any animal w half a brain cell to think abt going near it. have yall ever seen koala viscera. bc i have and let me tell u that shit is RANK. looks like the inside of a smoker's lung from some fuckdamn nicabate ad bc the tannins in eucalypt leaves stain their organs like khaki black. like some fuckin darklsteve irwin costume well better piss ur way right off from this one anti-steve bc thats a natural defense mechanism meant to warn u that koalas should in no way be alive and if u touch them theyll drag u into their stupid evolutionary dead-end where they get to sit around all day doin fuck all and pumpin themselves full of brain-killing poison while we run around makin them our olympic games mascots and pretending theyre cute and honest to god looking for ways to save them from the brink of extinction which actually is unnecessary bc a) theyre not really endangered at all, nature is a fuckign miracle and b) the drongos clearly want to die so i say let em reyroace by the way i never elaborated on "koalas sit in trees all day screaming" but heres a lil fuckin. heres a fun nugget heres a lil soundbyte this is what koalas sound like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v-jmeBQVQlsTU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v-O0CAx1jLbJk gallusrostromegalus My favorite story about Koalas comes from the book The Killer Koala Humorous Australian Bush Stories" By Kenneth Cook, which is an excellently good book with some A+ storytelling. he describes the Koala's "Anti-Dingo Defense", wherein they latch on to the belly of the dingo to slow down the rate at which they are being consumed alive by starving canid, gradually trn themselves around until they've got thier head in the Dingo's crotch, and then procede to BITE THE SHIT out of the Dingo's Tender Bits, whilst clowing at the ribs and projectile-evacuating thier bowels, Mr. Cook found out about the Anti-Dingo Defense beause he was tricked into 'rescuing' a bunch of koalas off an island by the promise of a Hot Date with a young lady, wondered why they were all being given armored aprons to handle the koalas with, only to find out firsthand, which pretty much ruined his prospects of a date. teratomarty What I'm getting is that koalas are basically Australian-grade Death Sloths. the more you know
Alive, Bodies , and Brains: ilthat
 TIL that due to their small brains koalas are unable to perform complex,
 unfamiliar tasks such as eat leaves off of flat surfaces.
 via reddit.com
 toast-potent
 how are they even alive
 kickin-jeans
 eucalyptus trees are full of flammable oil that causes the trees to explode during
 forest fires, killing other trees and spreading its seeds to grow in their place
 koalas survive solely because nothing else in their environment Wants To Eat
 The Fucking Bombs
 humandisastersquad
 WROTE THIS POST#god dont get me fuckin started#the NUMBER of times
 ive Gone Off abt koalas in zooarch class#on a scale of koalas to wombats how
 good is ur marsupial at Being Alive#hey hey u know what else? koalas are s0
 picky with their diet that theyll only eat the leaves of one (1) type of eucalypt#and
 even then ONLY specimens of that tree that are within a very tight geographic
 range of where the koala was born#the rescue centre in my city? they have to
 ship branches from all over the state bc koalas there physically Will Not Eat
 anything thats not#from their very very small very precise home range#theyd
 rather starve to death than try leaves from like the next suburb over#i have 60
 other reasons why koalas spit in the face of natural selection hmu if you want
 YELLING i cant be bothered to list them all here#god theyre so
 incomprehensibly dumb. god#HEY ALSO the reason their brains are so small is
 bc YEah the one SINGLE species of tree they eat is incredibly toxic#their diet
 consists of 1 food and it is Brain-Shrinking Poison (@reyroace)
 reyroace
 oh u like that? try this one: the main natural cause of death in koalas is
 starvation, because
 1) their dumbass teeth are SHIT. to be a herbivore and chomp cellulose all day u
 need some real tough grinders in there, and almost every other herbivore in
 nature has SOME sort of dental adaptation to make sure they dont run out of
 tooth by the time they hit middle age. horses have big tall teeth, wombat teeth
 grow forever, kangaroos have got a little conveyor belt system goin on, etc etc
 everyone's doin SOMETHING except fuckign koalas. idiots have tiny fuckin
 shortass normal teeth that do an okay job for maybe like 15 years and then wear
 down and leave them with ridiculous fuckin useless old man gums that do shit
 all. but thats fine bc all koalas do anyway is sit in trees and sleep 22hrs a day
 then wake up and scream and eat poison and they do this all day every day until
 they run out of teeth at which point they just fall out of the tree and die
 2) idiots can't die any other fuckin way bc nothing in nature wants to eat them bc
 their bodies are chocker block with LITERAL poison. fuckin USELESS their flesh
 just sits around and slowly rots bc its too gross-tasting and toxic for any animal
 w half a brain cell to think abt going near it. have yall ever seen koala viscera. bc
 i have and let me tell u that shit is RANK. looks like the inside of a smoker's lung
 from some fuckdamn nicabate ad bc the tannins in eucalypt leaves stain their
 organs like khaki black. like some fuckin darklsteve irwin costume well better
 piss ur way right off from this one anti-steve bc thats a natural defense
 mechanism meant to warn u that koalas should in no way be alive and if u touch
 them theyll drag u into their stupid evolutionary dead-end where they get to sit
 around all day doin fuck all and pumpin themselves full of brain-killing poison
 while we run around makin them our olympic games mascots and pretending
 theyre cute and honest to god looking for ways to save them from the brink of
 extinction which actually is unnecessary bc a) theyre not really endangered at
 all, nature is a fuckign miracle and b) the drongos clearly want to die so i say let
 em
 reyroace
 by the way i never elaborated on "koalas sit in trees all day screaming" but heres
 a lil fuckin. heres a fun nugget heres a lil soundbyte this is what koalas sound
 like
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v-jmeBQVQlsTU
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v-O0CAx1jLbJk
 gallusrostromegalus
 My favorite story about Koalas comes from the book The Killer Koala
 Humorous Australian Bush Stories" By Kenneth Cook, which is an excellently
 good book with some A+ storytelling. he describes the Koala's "Anti-Dingo
 Defense", wherein they latch on to the belly of the dingo to slow down the rate at
 which they are being consumed alive by starving canid, gradually trn themselves
 around until they've got thier head in the Dingo's crotch, and then procede to
 BITE THE SHIT out of the Dingo's Tender Bits, whilst clowing at the ribs and
 projectile-evacuating thier bowels,
 Mr. Cook found out about the Anti-Dingo Defense beause he was tricked
 into 'rescuing' a bunch of koalas off an island by the promise of a Hot Date with
 a young lady, wondered why they were all being given armored aprons to handle
 the koalas with, only to find out firsthand, which pretty much ruined his prospects
 of a date.
 teratomarty
 What I'm getting is that koalas are basically Australian-grade Death Sloths.
the more you know

the more you know

Bodies , Fucking, and Jesus: Damn, girl, you look good! Whatcha doin' later? Can I get yo numbah? That's how all women should feel about their body This is how everyone should feel about their body I understand your point, but almost all men already do feel this way about their bodies and hardly any women do Stephen I can't even breathe for fear of inhaling the radiating, gaseous idiocy your unleashing into the world Men report being upset about their bodies at similar rates to women, from 15% to 40%. They also have similar rates of several eating disorders, and much higher rates of muscle dysmorphia, which is just as unhealthy as any eating disorder. Body dysmorphic disorder is a genderless condition. They're also completely ignored in the media and by a culture perpetuated by fucking pieces of shit like you I know several men who have considered suicide because they hate the way they look You are an abomination who has likely never met a man other than yourself and I am laughing so hard that your shitty, abortion of a blog advertises itself as using logic and having arguments. I doubt that you've been particularly exposed to either logic or arguments in your extraordinarily sheltered life And thanks for making it so easy to ignore your abominable opinion by proving that you have lived such a privileged, hallowed life to have not known as many men who hate their bodies as women t,dr. Find jesus. Ask the Wizard of Oz for a soul. Learn how to statistics. And oh take all your fucking biases towards men and put them in the trash where they belong you utterly repugnant living stain of filth. Damnn Shit that was brutal Damn girl
Bodies , Fucking, and Jesus: Damn, girl, you look good!
 Whatcha doin' later?
 Can I get yo numbah?
 That's how all women should feel about their body
 This is how everyone should feel about their body
 I understand your point, but almost all men already do feel this way about their
 bodies and hardly any women do
 Stephen
 I can't even breathe for fear of inhaling the radiating, gaseous idiocy your
 unleashing into the world
 Men report being upset about their bodies at similar rates to women, from 15%
 to 40%. They also have similar rates of several eating disorders, and much
 higher rates of muscle dysmorphia, which is just as unhealthy as any eating
 disorder. Body dysmorphic disorder is a genderless condition.
 They're also completely ignored in the media and by a culture perpetuated by
 fucking pieces of shit like you
 I know several men who have considered suicide because they hate the way
 they look
 You are an abomination who has likely never met a man other than yourself and
 I am laughing so hard that your shitty, abortion of a blog advertises itself as
 using logic and having arguments. I doubt that you've been particularly exposed
 to either logic or arguments in your extraordinarily sheltered life
 And thanks for making it so easy to ignore your abominable opinion by proving
 that you have lived such a privileged, hallowed life to have not known as many
 men who hate their bodies as women
 t,dr. Find jesus. Ask the Wizard of Oz for a soul. Learn how to statistics. And oh
 take all your fucking biases towards men and put them in the trash where they
 belong you utterly repugnant living stain of filth.
 Damnn
 Shit that was brutal
Damn girl

Damn girl

Animals, Bad, and Books: stardewfairy stardew valley gothic .the time passes so quickly yet so slowly. it's been a week, it's been months, it's been years. you do not age. nobody ages. the children don't grow up. you start forgetting everything about your life before you live here. you've always lived heree when it rains, you hear strange faraway howls and screams that fill you with primal terror. you never stay outside for long on rainy days your crops grow within days. you plant seeds in the ground. ten days later, the fields are overgrown with corn you find things when you dig in the dirt. roots, clay, stone. books skulls that don't look like they belong to any animal you know there are only two channels on tv. the weather and the fortune teller. it doesn't matter when you turn it on, the weather program is only just starting. it will be sunny tomorrow" the weatherman says with empty eyes and a too-wide smile. you flip to the fortune teller's channel. "the spirits are in a bad mood today" she says, "be careful you shiver, and decide not to go to the mines today .have you always been so strong? you can chop down a tree in minutes and you can carry hundreds of stones in your backpack. .you wake up at exactly 6 every morning. you can't wake up earlier, or later sometimes your scarecrows are not planted where they were yesterday .you hear whispers in the old community center. you can almost seee something indiscernable out of the corner of your eye. you bring offerings, hoping to appease the spirits, today it's winter you swear two days ago it was summer the berries you found in the woods have a strange metallic taste their juices stain your mouth red. you keep eating them anyway .nobody ages. nobody ages. nobody ages. what year is it? you keep bringing offerings in the old community center. honey milk, wine, peaches, dead animals. there are never enough offerings the fruit bats that live in the small cave near your house leave fruit for you. they bring you out of season fruit, exotic fruit, fruit that comes from halfway across the world, fruit that you've never seen before .the wizard granted you the power to understand the spirits that live in the old community center. now you wish he hadn't. every night when you get home, you lock the door and close the windows. every morning when you wake up, your cat is somehow inside the house .the train passes through stardew valley sometimes, but never stops. you can hear howls coming from it. you try talking to the people in the village, but they always seem to be repeating the same things. "do you have any blueberries?", asks lewis for the 14th time this month there are things in the mines. don't go into the mines we're insulated from the rest of the world here savs demetrius now that you think of it, you have never received a letter or a phone call from the outside world. is there even an outside world? there is a bath house, north of the town. there is never anyone there, but the electricity works and the water runs. when you enter the locker room, there is a bathing suit just your size waiting for you the water in the big bath is milky. you can't see the bottom. you enter it anyway. when you exit, you feel happy and energised. you have nothing to worry about. come back soon! . the bus to calico desert is out of service. the road to calico desert is out of service. do not go to calico desert. do not ask about calico desert. do no think about calico desert. there is no calico desert. you are out late at night, gathering berries. at exactly two am, something knocks you out. you wake up in your bed the following morning. don't think about it. go to sleep you try staying up past two am the following night, only to be knocked out again. go to sleep. go to sleep. go to sleep you have been here for a couple of weeks, or maybe for decades nothing changes. you can't die. you can't die. you can't die Source: stardewfairy 5,000 notes In the Valley of Stars
Animals, Bad, and Books: stardewfairy
 stardew valley gothic
 .the time passes so quickly yet so slowly. it's been a week, it's been
 months, it's been years. you do not age. nobody ages. the children
 don't grow up. you start forgetting everything about your life before
 you live here. you've always lived heree
 when it rains, you hear strange faraway howls and screams that fill
 you with primal terror. you never stay outside for long on rainy days
 your crops grow within days. you plant seeds in the ground. ten
 days later, the fields are overgrown with corn
 you find things when you dig in the dirt. roots, clay, stone. books
 skulls that don't look like they belong to any animal you know
 there are only two channels on tv. the weather and the fortune
 teller. it doesn't matter when you turn it on, the weather program is
 only just starting. it will be sunny tomorrow" the weatherman says
 with empty eyes and a too-wide smile. you flip to the fortune teller's
 channel. "the spirits are in a bad mood today" she says, "be careful
 you shiver, and decide not to go to the mines today
 .have you always been so strong? you can chop down a tree in
 minutes and you can carry hundreds of stones in your backpack.
 .you wake up at exactly 6 every morning. you can't wake up earlier,
 or later
 sometimes your scarecrows are not planted where they were
 yesterday
 .you hear whispers in the old community center. you can almost seee
 something indiscernable out of the corner of your eye. you bring
 offerings, hoping to appease the spirits, today it's winter you swear
 two days ago it was summer
 the berries you found in the woods have a strange metallic taste
 their juices stain your mouth red. you keep eating them anyway
 .nobody ages. nobody ages. nobody ages. what year is it?
 you keep bringing offerings in the old community center. honey
 milk, wine, peaches, dead animals. there are never enough offerings
 the fruit bats that live in the small cave near your house leave fruit
 for you. they bring you out of season fruit, exotic fruit, fruit that comes
 from halfway across the world, fruit that you've never seen before
 .the wizard granted you the power to understand the spirits that live
 in the old community center. now you wish he hadn't.
 every night when you get home, you lock the door and close the
 windows. every morning when you wake up, your cat is somehow
 inside the house
 .the train passes through stardew valley sometimes, but never
 stops. you can hear howls coming from it.
 you try talking to the people in the village, but they always seem to
 be repeating the same things. "do you have any blueberries?", asks
 lewis for the 14th time this month
 there are things in the mines. don't go into the mines
 we're insulated from the rest of the world here savs demetrius
 now that you think of it, you have never received a letter or a phone
 call from the outside world. is there even an outside world?
 there is a bath house, north of the town. there is never anyone
 there, but the electricity works and the water runs. when you enter
 the locker room, there is a bathing suit just your size waiting for you
 the water in the big bath is milky. you can't see the bottom. you enter
 it anyway. when you exit, you feel happy and energised. you have
 nothing to worry about. come back soon!
 . the bus to calico desert is out of service. the road to calico desert is
 out of service. do not go to calico desert. do not ask about calico
 desert. do no think about calico desert. there is no calico desert.
 you are out late at night, gathering berries. at exactly two am,
 something knocks you out. you wake up in your bed the following
 morning. don't think about it. go to sleep
 you try staying up past two am the following night, only to be
 knocked out again. go to sleep. go to sleep. go to sleep
 you have been here for a couple of weeks, or maybe for decades
 nothing changes. you can't die. you can't die. you can't die
 Source: stardewfairy
 5,000 notes
In the Valley of Stars

In the Valley of Stars