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Being Alone, Bad, and Fall: Same thing as yous Theseus. ARIADNE! What are YOU deing here? We're in THE UNDERWORLD. T got MURDERED raugh got thrown Oh, yeah, yikes. Me too, L+was was in though exile. ght off this It was cliff. Pretty bad. Hang on- Enough about ME Croy what have YOU been up to? I havent seen you in YEARS! didnt that keep in touch after that But okay here's what nappened: we after You mean, you lett me on Naxos to die? And you Said me, bt then I took oud marry You remember how we left Crete, after that sword gaveyu and golo thread, and killed the minotaur Jou and a nap you LEFT ME BEHIND I mean you can't REALLY blame me. You betrayed yar /family, How could you after THAT? My family fed people He didn't worry about my past We fell in love to a monster! and got married, But I forgive you guess because while I was on Naxos I met the most handsome Great glad you happy had a ife. Too bad all man I'd ever seen thngs an end, and Come to And ever since then, we've been so and so in love, and hapry now we're both stuck here in everything the Underworld... is Together just like the good old days... and alone for now... ARI ADNE WHERE ARE YOU Diony sus? Ft ARIADNE! Was so wonried! Babe! You... you married The God of Wine? God of Wine Ariadng I completely fargat weren't immortal. We need to fix that Theatre, and Ritual Madness, is the official ttle, I +hink. you Well decide laterSounds ike Plan And, hey Theseus? what do be the goddes thinkin passion NIce job with the minotaur. want to a let's now out Just get of here. For Yes? ruffboijuliaburnsides: oatmealraisinbagel: I know tumblr really loves Persephone and Hades, which I get, but my favorite Greek Mythical figure has to be Ariadne.  Until this year I had pretty much only ever heard of her in the context of the Theseus and the Minotaur myth, but her story actually continues past that and I love it.  (Disclaimer, as with any Greek myth there’s a billion versions, but my favorite goes like this) Ariadne helped Theseus kill the Minotaur.  She had to betray her family, but she knew she had to in order to stop the yearly sacrifices.  Theseus promised her he would marry her as thanks for her help. Theseus and Ariadne left Crete together, but since Theseus didn’t trust Ariadne to be a good wife, he left her behind on Naxos while she was napping.  Why didn’t he trust her to be a good wife?  She had betrayed her family. While on Naxos, Dionysus, god of wine, fertility, madness, theater, and celebration, happens to stop by.  He meets Ariadne and the two fall in love. Dionysus marries Ariadne.  Note: There are plenty of retellings of this myth, but almost all of them emphasize how happy Dionysus and Ariadne’s marriage was. Ariadne is killed and goes to Hades. Dionysus descends into Hades to get his wife back.  Ariadne gets to join the gods in Olympus, become immortal, and takes her place as the goddess of the labyrinth, mazes, paths, fertility, wine, and passion. Meanwhile, Theseus dies after being thrown off a cliff by Lycomedes. Ariadne is practically the personification of “the best revenge is living well” and I think that’s great. this is good shit.
Being Alone, Bad, and Fall: Same thing
 as yous
 Theseus.
 ARIADNE!
 What are YOU
 deing here?
 We're in
 THE UNDERWORLD.
 T got
 MURDERED
 raugh
 got
 thrown
 Oh, yeah, yikes.
 Me too,
 L+was
 was in
 though
 exile.
 ght off
 this
 It was
 cliff.
 Pretty
 bad.
 Hang on- Enough about ME
 Croy
 what have YOU been
 up to? I havent
 seen you in
 YEARS!
 didnt
 that
 keep in touch
 after that
 But okay
 here's
 what
 nappened:
 we
 after
 You mean,
 you lett me on
 Naxos to die?

 And you
 Said
 me, bt then I took
 oud marry
 You remember how
 we left Crete, after
 that sword
 gaveyu
 and golo thread, and
 killed the minotaur
 Jou
 and
 a
 nap
 you
 LEFT ME
 BEHIND
 I
 mean you can't REALLY
 blame me. You betrayed yar
 /family, How could
 you
 after
 THAT?
 My family fed people
 He didn't
 worry
 about
 my past
 We fell in love
 to a
 monster!
 and got married,
 But I forgive you guess
 because while I was on Naxos
 I met the most handsome
 Great glad you
 happy
 had a
 ife. Too bad all
 man I'd ever seen
 thngs
 an end, and
 Come to
 And ever since then,
 we've been so
 and so in love,
 and
 hapry
 now we're
 both stuck here in
 everything
 the Underworld...
 is

 Together just
 like the good
 old days...
 and
 alone
 for now...
 ARI ADNE WHERE
 ARE
 YOU
 Diony sus?
 Ft ARIADNE!
 Was so
 wonried!
 Babe!
 You...
 you
 married The
 God of Wine?
 God of Wine Ariadng I completely fargat
 weren't immortal.
 We need to
 fix that
 Theatre, and
 Ritual
 Madness,
 is the
 official
 ttle, I
 +hink.
 you
 Well decide laterSounds ike
 Plan
 And, hey
 Theseus?
 what do
 be the goddes
 thinkin passion
 NIce job
 with the
 minotaur.
 want to
 a
 let's
 now
 out
 Just get
 of here.
 For
 Yes?
ruffboijuliaburnsides:
oatmealraisinbagel:

I know tumblr really loves Persephone and Hades, which I get, but my favorite Greek Mythical figure has to be Ariadne.  Until this year I had pretty much only ever heard of her in the context of the Theseus and the Minotaur myth, but her story actually continues past that and I love it.  (Disclaimer, as with any Greek myth there’s a billion versions, but my favorite goes like this)
Ariadne helped Theseus kill the Minotaur.  She had to betray her family, but she knew she had to in order to stop the yearly sacrifices.  Theseus promised her he would marry her as thanks for her help.
Theseus and Ariadne left Crete together, but since Theseus didn’t trust Ariadne to be a good wife, he left her behind on Naxos while she was napping.  Why didn’t he trust her to be a good wife?  She had betrayed her family.
While on Naxos, Dionysus, god of wine, fertility, madness, theater, and celebration, happens to stop by.  He meets Ariadne and the two fall in love.
Dionysus marries Ariadne.  Note: There are plenty of retellings of this myth, but almost all of them emphasize how happy Dionysus and Ariadne’s marriage was.
Ariadne is killed and goes to Hades.
Dionysus descends into Hades to get his wife back.  Ariadne gets to join the gods in Olympus, become immortal, and takes her place as the goddess of the labyrinth, mazes, paths, fertility, wine, and passion.
Meanwhile, Theseus dies after being thrown off a cliff by Lycomedes.
Ariadne is practically the personification of “the best revenge is living well” and I think that’s great.

this is good shit.

ruffboijuliaburnsides: oatmealraisinbagel: I know tumblr really loves Persephone and Hades, which I get, but my favorite Greek Mythical fig...

Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s A dating service where matching is based people's search history exists. You're a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer. endreams-s Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it? Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart attack. Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks in a breath* ok fangoddess817 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks December C) Baby infinityonthot A++ addition tetsuskitten Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene they're writing* babe, i'm not sure if this would actually work? Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great tigerliliesandcherryblossoms I LOVE THIS vmohlere Oh no, murder comedy is my jam laziestofthedreamers I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gullible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it's completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work. Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there's something to the theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author's home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries. So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he'll FINALLY have proof. annieutimagines Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal. "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer." Serial killer breaths in. "Look-" I love this so much
Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s
 A dating service where matching is based
 people's search history exists. You're a serial killer.
 You go on a date with a writer.
 endreams-s
 Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill
 someone, how would you do it?
 Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a
 heart attack.
 Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks
 in a breath* ok
 fangoddess817
 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to
 potentially stab someone in the guts
 Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes
 Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks
 December C) Baby
 infinityonthot
 A++ addition
 tetsuskitten
 Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene
 they're writing* babe, i'm not sure if this would
 actually work?
 Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and
 leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood
 coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great
 tigerliliesandcherryblossoms
 I LOVE THIS
 vmohlere
 Oh no, murder comedy is my jam
 laziestofthedreamers
 I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does
 the author know? Like are they aware that their
 significant other is a serial killer or do they just think
 that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be
 even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like
 how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly
 gullible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime
 novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop
 or something so it's completely normal for them to
 come home smelling like blood, no murders going on
 here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home
 from a long day at work.
 Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed
 to get their first book published, with loving support
 from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all
 the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that
 detective with the local police department has
 noticed some disturbing similarities to several active
 cases, including details that were never released to
 the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior
 and convinces him that there's something to the
 theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes
 out the author's home and is super convinced that
 the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do
 anything??? Like they literally are at the house all
 day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries.
 So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the
 author for creative murder schemes, the author
 being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and
 finally the detective who is just so sure that the
 author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long
 enough he'll FINALLY have proof.
 annieutimagines
 Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go
 out so it gets sub what personal.
 "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a
 serial killer."
 Serial killer breaths in. "Look-"
I love this so much

I love this so much

Apparently, Beard, and Community: Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g Okay, let me tell you about my friend Jose. Jose is AMAB, 6'5" and built like a linebacker, with lots of visible tattoos. They're trying to grow a beard but the genes for it aren't quite there so for now it's Quentin Collins-style mutton chops. /1 big lumberjack 12:42 PM Aug 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 1.8K Likes 657 Retweets > Topher? Is thata thing? @topher_g 5h Replying to@topher_g Jose is a master of wearing just enough eyeliner to make you question whether they're wearing eyeliner or just have really pretty eyes. But in general if you saw them on the street you'd likely think "that is a big scary looking dude." /2 2 t 16 882 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h Jose is non-binary (And pansexual but that's not important to the story) and uses singular "they." /3 2 ti 19 897 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h Yesterday Jose was excited to go to a local meetup for Latinx "women and nonbinary people" because they were hoping to make some friends/community connections. /4 2 ti 35 925 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h I spent an hour last night at Jose's apartment with them literally crying on my shoulder because they were told they weren't welcome at the meeting. /5 4 ti 39 1K Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h Someone there told them when they said "women and nonbinary people" what they actually meant was "women, and women who identify as nonbinary." That's apparently an actual quote. /6 O 24 t1138 1.4K Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g Someone there told them when they said "women and nonbinary people" what they actually meant was "women, and women who identify as nonbinary." That's apparently an actual quote. /6 12:42 PM Aug 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 138 Retweets 1.4K Likes Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g I have always had issues with the phrase "women and nonbinary" but today I am LIVID that my friend went looking for community and allies and basically got rejected for not being some waify androgyne. /7 12:42 PM Aug 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone 2.3K Likes 178 Retweets droideka-exe: NB 👏 Does 👏 Not 👏 Mean 👏 Woman 👏 Lite link to thread
Apparently, Beard, and Community: Topher? Is that a thing?
 @topher_g
 Okay, let me tell you about my friend Jose. Jose is
 AMAB, 6'5" and built like a linebacker, with lots of
 visible tattoos. They're trying to grow a
 beard but the genes for it aren't quite there so for now
 it's Quentin Collins-style mutton chops. /1
 big lumberjack
 12:42 PM Aug 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone
 1.8K Likes
 657 Retweets
 >

 Topher? Is thata thing? @topher_g 5h
 Replying to@topher_g
 Jose is a master of wearing just enough eyeliner to make you question
 whether they're wearing eyeliner or just have really pretty eyes. But in
 general if you saw them on the street you'd likely think "that is a big scary
 looking dude." /2
 2
 t 16
 882
 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h
 Jose is non-binary (And pansexual but that's not important to the story) and
 uses singular "they." /3
 2
 ti 19
 897
 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h
 Yesterday Jose was excited to go to a local meetup for Latinx "women and
 nonbinary people" because they were hoping to make some
 friends/community connections. /4
 2
 ti 35
 925
 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h
 I spent an hour last night at Jose's apartment with them literally crying on
 my shoulder because they were told they weren't welcome at the meeting.
 /5
 4
 ti 39
 1K
 Topher? Is that a thing? @topher_g 5h
 Someone there told them when they said "women and nonbinary people"
 what they actually meant was "women, and women who identify as
 nonbinary." That's apparently
 an actual quote. /6
 O 24
 t1138
 1.4K

 Topher? Is that a thing?
 @topher_g
 Someone there told them when they said "women and
 nonbinary people" what they actually meant was
 "women, and women who identify as nonbinary." That's
 apparently an actual quote. /6
 12:42 PM Aug 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone
 138 Retweets
 1.4K Likes

 Topher? Is that a thing?
 @topher_g
 I have always had issues with the phrase "women and
 nonbinary" but today I am LIVID that my friend went
 looking for community and allies and basically got
 rejected for not being some waify androgyne. /7
 12:42 PM Aug 27, 2019 Twitter for iPhone
 2.3K Likes
 178 Retweets
droideka-exe:
NB 👏 Does 👏 Not 👏 Mean 👏 Woman 👏 Lite
link to thread

droideka-exe: NB 👏 Does 👏 Not 👏 Mean 👏 Woman 👏 Lite link to thread

Beautiful, Birthday, and Crazy: thejoanglebook: gerrycoco: Joan Appreciation Day song  Here is my humble contribution to Joan Appreciation Day.  @thejoanglebook this one’s for you ***Personal note*** I struggle to see projects through in life, for many different reasons that aren’t worth going into at the moment. All I can say is that I’m inspired every day by people like Joan who put their heart and soul into what they do. Joan you are a comedy genius, a musical mastermind and all around crazy talented human being.You are the reason I pushed myself to make this video. This past weekend I learned that Joan Appreciation Day was on September 3rd and so wished to contribute something but didn’t know what. At one point I had a spark of inspiration and actually decided to follow it and do something with it for once. If anyone could appreciate a good pun it’s definitely you. And you more than deserve all the praise that we can give. So I took my courage and attempted to put it to good use, and I’m rather proud of the result.So thank you for not only inspiring me, but also for being a catalyst to put myself out there and giving something new a try. Hello @gerrycoco and hello everyone else. Sorry, I’ve been pretty quiet today/yesterday, but you should understand that I’m the type of person whose reaction to a performance of happy birthday dedicated to me is an internal: “do I deserve this? Don’t make eye contact. This will be over soon.” I can be pretty emotionally unavailable, and I feel like I should be absolutely floored by the incredible honor of having so many people celebrate me, but instead of feeling thankful, I feel like I owe something back. I’m like “oh God, they’re all being so kind. How do I show my appreciation for them?” Especially because on some level, I feel like reblogging all of your wonderful works of art could be vanity. I’m terrified of vanity. I don’t want to lose touch, and start to think more of myself then I deserve to. I want to keep growing, and I want to put others first. If I accept this gesture, does that mean I agree that I deserve it, or that I’m done growing? I don’t think I’m a genius at all (and I’d rather you not rebut that, because I’m really not trying to fish for compliments here).That said, the one thing I’m the most happy about having accomplished, is having worked on, written for, contributed to, or created projects that have inspired other artists. Some of you may know that I’m very pro-fan fiction. If I don’t accomplish anything else, I love that someone could’ve felt motivated to make something beautiful after seeing me attempt to make something beautiful myself. It really does warm my heart. That’s why I’m reblogging this, because I love that you felt the neccessary courage to put yourself out there, @gerrycoco… I’m really, really glad that you did. It’s a lovely song. And believe me, I really struggle to see things through myself– that’s why I only collaborate with people, because sometimes I think that that might be the only way that I can finish anything.I think I’m going to continue reblogging art for the occasion (a little belated, I know). Even if I don’t think I’m emotionally ready to believe I’m at all worthy of being celebrated, I do think that all of you wonderful artists are.🧡 Joan
Beautiful, Birthday, and Crazy: thejoanglebook:

gerrycoco:

Joan Appreciation Day song  Here is my humble contribution to Joan Appreciation Day.  @thejoanglebook this one’s for you ***Personal note*** I struggle to see projects through in life, for many
different reasons that aren’t worth going into at the moment. All I can say is
that I’m inspired every day by people like Joan who put their heart and soul
into what they do. Joan you are a comedy genius, a musical mastermind and all
around crazy talented human being.You are the reason I pushed myself to make this video. This
past weekend I learned that Joan Appreciation Day was on September 3rd and so
wished to contribute something but didn’t know what. At one point I had a spark
of inspiration and actually decided to follow it and do something with it for
once. If anyone could appreciate a good pun it’s definitely you. And you more
than deserve all the praise that we can give. So I took my courage and
attempted to put it to good use, and I’m rather proud of the result.So thank you for not only inspiring me, but also for being a
catalyst to put myself out there and giving something new a try.

Hello @gerrycoco and hello everyone else. Sorry, I’ve been pretty quiet today/yesterday, but you should understand that I’m the type of person whose reaction to a performance of happy birthday dedicated to me is an internal: “do I deserve this? Don’t make eye contact. This will be over soon.” I can be pretty emotionally unavailable, and I feel like I should be absolutely floored by the incredible honor of having so many people celebrate me, but instead of feeling thankful, I feel like I owe something back. I’m like “oh God, they’re all being so kind. How do I show my appreciation for them?” Especially because on some level, I feel like reblogging all of your wonderful works of art could be vanity. I’m terrified of vanity. I don’t want to lose touch, and start to think more of myself then I deserve to. I want to keep growing, and I want to put others first. If I accept this gesture, does that mean I agree that I deserve it, or that I’m done growing? I don’t think I’m a genius at all (and I’d rather you not rebut that, because I’m really not trying to fish for compliments here).That said, the one thing I’m the most happy about having accomplished, is having worked on, written for, contributed to, or created projects that have inspired other artists. Some of you may know that I’m very pro-fan fiction. If I don’t accomplish anything else, I love that someone could’ve felt motivated to make something beautiful after seeing me attempt to make something beautiful myself. It really does warm my heart. That’s why I’m reblogging this, because I love that you felt the neccessary courage to put yourself out there, @gerrycoco… I’m really, really glad that you did. It’s a lovely song. And believe me, I really struggle to see things through myself– that’s why I only collaborate with people, because sometimes I think that that might be the only way that I can finish anything.I think I’m going to continue reblogging art for the occasion (a little belated, I know). Even if I don’t think I’m emotionally ready to believe I’m at all worthy of being celebrated, I do think that all of you wonderful artists are.🧡 Joan

thejoanglebook: gerrycoco: Joan Appreciation Day song  Here is my humble contribution to Joan Appreciation Day.  @thejoanglebook this one’...

Superman, Target, and Tumblr: Oh, no! lankybrunettepartdeux:#i like to think that one day he was drawing glasses on superman’s picture in the paper#and that’s how he found out
nsfw
Superman, Target, and Tumblr: Oh, no!
lankybrunettepartdeux:#i like to think that one day he was drawing glasses on superman’s picture in the paper#and that’s how he found out

lankybrunettepartdeux:#i like to think that one day he was drawing glasses on superman’s picture in the paper#and that’s how he found out

Children, Climbing, and Fucking: elidyce: luckyladylily: ohnoagremlin: itsvondell: off-in-lala-land: You know, if I was a parent, it would be at this point that I’d rip the game from his hands, stash it in my backpack, and force him to enjoy history goddamnit. This vacation cost a lot and the game is only for the hotel and travel time. imagine trying to force someone to think that stonehenge is fun take your kids places they actually want to go instead of getting mad when they quietly self-entertain, he’s not hurting nobody. me & my shitbag siblings would be climbing that fucking thing, gameboy kid is doing alright Some small child: does not yet have the mental development or contextual understanding to appreciate why these particular rocks are extra interesting. Some adult: God I hate that children don’t think like adults! I would force them to pretend they do because I interpret child thought patterns as a personal insult! Child: *looks at rocks for approx. 30 seconds, listens to vaguely interesting story about them for another minute or so, glances at the rocks again, is Now Done. Parent: I understand that your attention span has done all it can with the stimulation provided. Here is your gameboy to keep you entertained while the adults talk about things you don’t find interesting, like the history of very large rocks. Child: *quietly squats down and plays with the gameboy, allowing adults to enjoy their rocks* Parent: I am very glad that I understand to some extent how children’s minds work, or this holiday would be a miserable experience for both of us. How fortunate that I planned ahead to allow my child periods of rest and quiet entertainment during excursions that are primarily for my benefit and enjoyment.
Children, Climbing, and Fucking: elidyce:

luckyladylily:

ohnoagremlin:

itsvondell:

off-in-lala-land:

You know, if I was a parent, it would be at this point that I’d rip the game from his hands, stash it in my backpack, and force him to enjoy history goddamnit. This vacation cost a lot and the game is only for the hotel and travel time.

imagine trying to force someone to think that stonehenge is fun


take your kids places they actually want to go instead of getting mad when they quietly self-entertain, he’s not hurting nobody. me & my shitbag siblings would be climbing that fucking thing, gameboy kid is doing alright 


Some small child: does not yet have the mental development or contextual understanding to appreciate why these particular rocks are extra interesting.
Some adult: God I hate that children don’t think like adults! I would force them to pretend they do because I interpret child thought patterns as a personal insult!

Child: *looks at rocks for approx. 30 seconds, listens to vaguely interesting story about them for another minute or so, glances at the rocks again, is Now Done.
Parent: I understand that your attention span has done all it can with the stimulation provided. Here is your gameboy to keep you entertained while the adults talk about things you don’t find interesting, like the history of very large rocks.
Child: *quietly squats down and plays with the gameboy, allowing adults to enjoy their rocks*
Parent: I am very glad that I understand to some extent how children’s minds work, or this holiday would be a miserable experience for both of us. How fortunate that I planned ahead to allow my child periods of rest and quiet entertainment during excursions that are primarily for my benefit and enjoyment.

elidyce: luckyladylily: ohnoagremlin: itsvondell: off-in-lala-land: You know, if I was a parent, it would be at this point that I’d rip...

Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s A dating service where matching is based on people's search history exists. You're a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer. endreams-s Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it? Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart attack Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: "sucks in a breath ok fangoddess817 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes Writer, already bringing a ring out: "shaking thanks infinityonthot A++ addition tetsuskitten Writer: "shows the serial killer the murder scene they're writing actually work? babe, i'm not sure if this would Serial killer: "kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great tigerliliesandcherryblossoms ILOVE THIS vmohlere Oh no, murder comedy is my jam laziestofthedreamers Ilove this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gulible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it's completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work. Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that a detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there's something to the theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author's home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries. So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he'll FINALLY have proof. annieutimagines Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal. "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer." Serial killer breaths in. "Look-" ladyhavilliard ..perfect theskystealerthebookthief I need 4 seasons and a movie on this I would watch the hell out of this
Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s
 A dating service where matching is based on
 people's search history exists. You're a serial killer.
 You go on a date with a writer.
 endreams-s
 Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill
 someone, how would you do it?
 Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart
 attack
 Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: "sucks in
 a breath ok
 fangoddess817
 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to
 potentially stab someone in the guts
 Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes
 Writer, already bringing a ring out: "shaking thanks
 infinityonthot
 A++ addition
 tetsuskitten
 Writer: "shows the serial killer the murder scene
 they're writing
 actually work?
 babe, i'm not sure if this would
 Serial killer: "kisses writer on the forehead and
 leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood
 coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great
 tigerliliesandcherryblossoms
 ILOVE THIS
 vmohlere
 Oh no, murder comedy is my jam
 laziestofthedreamers
 Ilove this, I love all of this, but quick question, does
 the author know? Like are they aware that their
 significant other is a serial killer or do they just think
 that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even
 funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how
 Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly
 gulible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime
 novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop
 or something so it's completely normal for them to
 come home smelling like blood, no murders going on
 here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home
 from a long day at work.
 Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed
 to get their first book published, with loving support
 from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all
 the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that
 a detective with the local police department has
 noticed some disturbing similarities to several active
 cases, including details that were never released to
 the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior
 and convinces him that there's something to the
 theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes
 out the author's home and is super convinced that
 the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do
 anything??? Like they literally are at the house all
 day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries.
 So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the
 author for creative murder schemes, the author
 being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and
 finally the detective who is just so sure that the
 author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long
 enough he'll FINALLY have proof.
 annieutimagines
 Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go
 out so it gets sub what personal.
 "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a
 serial killer."
 Serial killer breaths in. "Look-"
 ladyhavilliard
 ..perfect
 theskystealerthebookthief
 I need 4 seasons and a movie on this
I would watch the hell out of this

I would watch the hell out of this

Ash, Bad, and Chill: Sat, Jun 22, 18:36 Hello traveller, I am your guide. Are you ready to begin your quest? Hello stranger, what do I need to do, to complete your request. You have to recover a long time lost manuscript held by a famous necromancer. Your journey begins in a forest. The left of you is a mountain with a large boulder blocking it's entrance, in front of you is an ancient graveyard. Some of the greatest heroes of the realm rest there I would like to investigate the grave- yard of it looks chill or haunted. Not strong enough to push that boulder As you enter the graveyard you notice old tombstones crumbling, scribed in language too ancient to be known by any living creature. While searching around you find a crypt, the front door has been knocked open, you can hear a soft gust of wind coming from inside. I copy the ancient text, best as possible. I use 'produce flame' when I enter the crypt. As you go in the light from your spell fills the room, you notice the coffins that adorn the walls and a spiral staircase that leads further down, at the bottom of it lies a large room, broken pillars, and a statue of Sild, the Warlock. A very powerful wizard from centuries past. Further away, with barely any light around it, you see a creature in a black robe facing away, as it ignores you on purpouse. There's a corpse on an alter in front of it, and it's hands deep inside it As I enter the room I go "excuuuuuse me, but it's not nice to sacrifice people" en hold my flame ready to attack if he would attack me... The creature in black turns annoyed by your interference, you see a beetle crawl out of it's eye socket, it's deformed face makes your stomach sick, as you think that eating all those fries before entering a graveyard was a bad idea. A purple light starts forming as he moves his hands together With a quick look around you notice a large floating orb 3 meters above the creature's head. You remember the old legend of Sild's orb, which he used teleport anywhere in the world. Nasty! God damn it those fries! I shoot my flame to the orb so the bug guy can't escape. And pull out my scimitar ready to attack As your flame hits, the orb shatters into what seems to be glass spikes, flying everywhere, further damaging the room. Some hit the creature, tearing his black robes just to reveal pieces of rotting flesh. The stench of death takes over the room, you can't hold those fries anymore, as you make an effort to not puke onto your brand new heels -and you hear your own voice in your head WHY WOULD YOU GO INTO A GRAVEYARD USING HEELS WOMAN ? As you get distracted, the creature fires his spell, you quickly block it with your scimitar, but it flies away from your hand. You are disarmed and the creature starts running in your direction "I DON'T I WANTED SOMETHING DIFFERENT THEN THE USUAL SNEAKERS as I replied to my own question. I take them of hold them as a weapon ready to defend myself against the ugly bug dude. And try to figure out if I can back to my scimitar. As you dual-wield your brand new puke-free heels you notice a two fast moving shadows moving behind the creature. Desperation starts to hit as you are outnumbered and your scimitar is nowhere to be seen, suddenly the shadows jump onto the creatures head and start attacking him. IT'S YOUR FAMILIARS, your thank yourself for installing that catdoor years ago. The creature loses balance just as it reaches you, slipping and faceplanting your puddle fries and cola that rested on the floor. You plunge it's head with both heels. It explodes and the creature slowly starts turning into ashes... You give a well deserved pet to them. The comforting purring sounds fills the room, you feel safe now. One of your familiars starts digging into the ash pile, as he found something of value there. IT'S A FORTUNE COOKIE! I go like "Oooh cookie!" I break it open and eat the cookie while I read. And also keep petting them, like a good rub under the chin. You slowly chew the cookie, the slight chocolate taste is well welcome at this moment, unravel the note, and it says , hit me up for fries & movies sometime. Sept Her profile said she was into RPGs
Ash, Bad, and Chill: Sat, Jun 22, 18:36
 Hello traveller, I am your guide. Are you
 ready to begin your quest?
 Hello stranger, what do I need to do,
 to complete your request.
 You have to recover a long time
 lost manuscript held by a famous
 necromancer. Your journey begins in a
 forest. The left of you is a mountain with
 a large boulder blocking it's entrance,
 in front of you is an ancient graveyard.
 Some of the greatest heroes of the
 realm rest there
 I would like to investigate the grave-
 yard of it looks chill or haunted. Not
 strong enough to push that boulder
 As you enter the graveyard you notice
 old tombstones crumbling, scribed in
 language too ancient to be known by
 any living creature. While searching
 around you find a crypt, the front door
 has been knocked open, you can hear
 a soft gust of wind coming from inside.
 I copy the ancient text, best as
 possible. I use 'produce flame' when I
 enter the crypt.
 As you go in the light from your spell
 fills the room, you notice the coffins that
 adorn the walls and a spiral staircase
 that leads further down, at the bottom
 of it lies a large room, broken pillars,
 and a statue of Sild, the Warlock. A very
 powerful wizard from centuries past.
 Further away, with barely any light
 around it, you see a creature in a black
 robe facing away, as it ignores you on
 purpouse. There's a corpse on an alter
 in front of it, and it's hands deep inside
 it
 As I enter the room I go "excuuuuuse
 me, but it's not nice to sacrifice
 people" en hold my flame ready to
 attack if he would attack me...
 The creature in black turns annoyed
 by your interference, you see a
 beetle crawl out of it's eye socket, it's
 deformed face makes your stomach
 sick, as you think that eating all those
 fries before entering a graveyard was
 a bad idea. A purple light starts forming
 as he moves his hands together
 With a quick look around you notice a
 large floating orb 3 meters above the
 creature's head. You remember the
 old legend of Sild's orb, which he used
 teleport anywhere in the world.
 Nasty! God damn it those fries! I shoot
 my flame to the orb so the bug guy
 can't escape. And pull out my scimitar
 ready to attack
 As your flame hits, the orb shatters into
 what seems to be glass spikes, flying
 everywhere, further damaging the
 room. Some hit the creature, tearing
 his black robes just to reveal pieces of
 rotting flesh. The stench of death takes
 over the room, you can't hold those
 fries anymore, as you make an effort
 to not puke onto your brand new heels
 -and you hear your own voice in your
 head WHY WOULD YOU GO INTO A
 GRAVEYARD USING HEELS WOMAN ?
 As you get distracted, the creature
 fires his spell, you quickly block it with
 your scimitar, but it flies away from
 your hand. You are disarmed and the
 creature starts running in your direction
 "I DON'T I WANTED SOMETHING
 DIFFERENT THEN THE USUAL
 SNEAKERS as I replied to my own
 question. I take them of hold them
 as a weapon ready to defend myself
 against the ugly bug dude. And try to
 figure out if I can back to my scimitar.
 As you dual-wield your brand new
 puke-free heels you notice a two fast
 moving shadows moving behind the
 creature. Desperation starts to hit as
 you are outnumbered and your scimitar
 is nowhere to be seen, suddenly the
 shadows jump onto the creatures head
 and start attacking him. IT'S YOUR
 FAMILIARS, your thank yourself for
 installing that catdoor years ago.
 The creature loses balance just as it
 reaches you, slipping and faceplanting
 your puddle fries and cola that rested
 on the floor.
 You plunge it's head with both heels. It
 explodes and the creature slowly starts
 turning into ashes... You give a well
 deserved pet to them. The comforting
 purring sounds fills the room, you feel
 safe now. One of your familiars starts
 digging into the ash pile, as he found
 something of value there.
 IT'S A FORTUNE COOKIE!
 I go like "Oooh cookie!" I break it open
 and eat the cookie while I read. And
 also keep petting them, like a good
 rub under the chin.
 You slowly chew the cookie, the slight
 chocolate taste is well welcome at this
 moment, unravel the note, and it says
 , hit me up for fries &
 movies sometime.
 Sept
Her profile said she was into RPGs

Her profile said she was into RPGs