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Be Like, Life, and Mood: Anonymous 08/03/19(Sat)00:42:45 No.53711001 Simple. I want to kidnap a woman and transform her. I want to find some random frumpy woman and knock her out, take her to a secluded area and lock her 169 KB JPG underground. I don't want to hurt her or make her suffer; her room will be nice, she'll get three square meals a day, for all intents and purposes it'll be like a vacation. But every few weeks I'll knock her out with gas and she'll wake up with some new operation done. Whether it be implants, lipo, or anything plastic surgery related I'll do this over the course of 6 months to a year, having her write in a diary about her new body and how she's learning to live with it. By the end she'll look nothing like what she used to, depending on my mood she might have gigantic beshine tits, or maybe a wasp waist. Either way I'll throw her back into the wild to live the rest of her life in a body that isn't hers and start over with a new girl. black-in-kansas: edgarallenbroe: the-mighty-birdy: supreme-leader-stoat: the-mighty-birdy: officialfist: WELL IF THIS AIN’T THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I’VE READ IN A WHILE You’d think with the fact CyberSmith is literally under criminal investigation for child image content violation he’d think it not wise to act so debauched on Tumblr. He doesn’t strike me as the wise type. Me: Let’s see what’s going on with Tumblr todayFirst thing I see: *This shit*Me:
Be Like, Life, and Mood: Anonymous
 08/03/19(Sat)00:42:45 No.53711001
 Simple. I want to kidnap a woman
 and transform her. I want to find
 some random frumpy woman and
 knock her out, take her to a
 secluded area and lock her
 169 KB JPG
 underground. I don't want to hurt her
 or make her suffer; her room will be nice, she'll get
 three square meals a day, for all intents and
 purposes it'll be like a vacation. But every few
 weeks I'll knock her out with gas and she'll wake up
 with some new operation done. Whether it be
 implants, lipo, or anything plastic surgery related
 I'll do this over the course of 6 months to a year,
 having her write in a diary about her new body and
 how she's learning to live with it. By the end she'll
 look nothing like what she used to, depending on
 my mood she might have gigantic beshine tits, or
 maybe a wasp waist. Either way I'll throw her back
 into the wild to live the rest of her life in a body that
 isn't hers and start over with a new girl.
black-in-kansas:

edgarallenbroe:

the-mighty-birdy:
supreme-leader-stoat:


the-mighty-birdy:

officialfist:



WELL IF THIS AIN’T THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I’VE READ IN A WHILE




You’d think with the fact CyberSmith is literally under criminal investigation for child image content violation he’d think it not wise to act so debauched on Tumblr.

He doesn’t strike me as the wise type.

Me: Let’s see what’s going on with Tumblr todayFirst thing I see: *This shit*Me:

black-in-kansas: edgarallenbroe: the-mighty-birdy: supreme-leader-stoat: the-mighty-birdy: officialfist: WELL IF THIS AIN’T THE MOST...

Shit, Target, and Tumblr: shiny-rhydon: thatpettyblackgirl: How the hell this shit is the new…
Shit, Target, and Tumblr: shiny-rhydon:
thatpettyblackgirl:


How the hell



this shit is the new…

shiny-rhydon: thatpettyblackgirl: How the hell this shit is the new…

Facebook, Omg, and Saw: Red @redgermz Saw this on Facebook and sent it to my brother, who is a pharmacist. Unsa man na b 10:29 AM Paracetamol OMG pseudonymsobriquet: klubbhead: halcyonjester: xmagnet-o: cfluffiness: Someone in facebook also posted this too Omg Mediglyphics This shit’s infuriating Oh, this is a type of shorthand! There are 3 main types, but from my research, this looks to be American Gregg Shorthand. As you can see, there are set symbols for every letter. Let’s break one of the words down: Using the Gregg Alphabet as reference, we can see most of the letters in “atrophied” are present. But why no “o” vowel, and why is “ph” written as “f”? Simple. In shorthand, you cut out all vowels in a word when writing it down, with the exception of words that BEGIN or END with a vowel (hence the “a” at the start being present), or like in the “i” in “atrophied”, to make it more readable when the sound could be harder to distinguish if it isn’t written. In “atrophied” if the the “i” isn’t written, it could be hard to tell if the writer meant a “fud”, “fad”, “fod” or “fid” sound, for example. Also, since Shorthand is a phonetic writing system, you are encouraged to write down the phonetic sounds of words rather than the actual letter blends - in this case, write an “f” instead of a “ph”. So in actuality, these aren’t just meaningless scribbles - it’s Gregg Shorthand, a writing system developed to take down notes more quickly than when written out in full, which is very useful in a medical or journalistic environment. Some people can even write over 100 words in a minute! And, it’s been in use since John Robert Gregg invented it in 1888! Wow! So old! Isn’t language amazing~? Ya tenéis traductor.
Facebook, Omg, and Saw: Red
 @redgermz
 Saw this on Facebook and sent it to
 my brother, who is a pharmacist.
 Unsa man na b
 10:29 AM
 Paracetamol
 OMG
pseudonymsobriquet:

klubbhead:

halcyonjester:


xmagnet-o:

cfluffiness:


Someone in facebook also posted this too


Omg

Mediglyphics


This shit’s infuriating

Oh, this is a type of shorthand! 
There are 3 main types, but from my research, this looks to be American Gregg Shorthand.


As you can see, there are set symbols for every letter. 
Let’s break one of the words down:
Using the Gregg Alphabet as reference, we can see most of the letters in “atrophied” are present. But why no “o” vowel, and why is “ph” written as “f”? 
Simple. In shorthand, you cut out all vowels in a word when writing it down, with the exception of words that BEGIN or END with a vowel (hence the “a” at the start being present), or like in the “i” in “atrophied”, to make it more readable when the sound could be harder to distinguish if it isn’t written. In “atrophied” if the the “i” isn’t written, it could be hard to tell if the writer meant a “fud”, “fad”, “fod” or “fid” sound, for example.
Also, since Shorthand is a phonetic writing system, you are encouraged to write down the phonetic sounds of words rather than the actual letter blends - in this case, write an “f” instead of a “ph”. 
So in actuality, these aren’t just meaningless scribbles - it’s Gregg Shorthand, a writing system developed to take down notes more quickly than when written out in full, which is very useful in a medical or journalistic environment. 
Some people can even write over 100 words in a minute! And, it’s been in use since John Robert Gregg invented it in 1888! Wow! So old!
Isn’t language amazing~? 

Ya tenéis traductor.

pseudonymsobriquet: klubbhead: halcyonjester: xmagnet-o: cfluffiness: Someone in facebook also posted this too Omg Mediglyphics ...

Crazy, Fucking, and Funny: Donatello/Michelangelo kittyknowsthings: friendlylycanthrope: ao3tagoftheday: ethermaster: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading “donatello/michelangelo”] The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Renaissance fanart I’m gonna let you in on a secret. That aint renaissance fanart You know what, assholes? I run this blog for y'all every day. I see things you cannot begin to imagine. I have to read people’s Robespierre smut and their questions about how various monsters would fuck them. I am so jaded that, when someone submits a tag mentioning some random vaguely liquid substance without context, I just assume it’s being used as lube. Nutella? Lube. Crazy glue? Lube. Divine fucking ichor? Fucking lube! I do this for you, y'all. I shield you from this shit. I stand athwart the tides of horror, hold my hands up, and yell “STOP” in the hopes that it will keep the waters from reaching you. So you know what, fuckheads!? If I want to maintain the one tiny scrap of innocence I have left, I will. The official policy of AO3TagoftheDay is now that turtles, teenage, mutant, ninja, or otherwise, do not fuck. It never happens. They don’t fuck. They don’t fuck each other. They don’t fuck humans. They don’t fuck in real life and they don’t fuck in fiction. This tag is about two gay Renaissance painters holding each other close and kissing chastely under the Sistine chapel ceiling. There. Glad we got that sorted out. Please return to your regularly scheduled programming. Ao3tagoftheday finally snapped I don’t know why this is so funny but I’m laughing to the point of tears
Crazy, Fucking, and Funny: Donatello/Michelangelo
kittyknowsthings:
friendlylycanthrope:

ao3tagoftheday:

ethermaster:

ao3tagoftheday:


[Image Description: Tag reading “donatello/michelangelo”]

The AO3 Tag of the Day is: Renaissance fanart 


I’m gonna let you in on a secret.
That aint renaissance fanart
You know what, assholes? I run this blog for y'all every day. I see things you cannot begin to imagine. I have to read people’s Robespierre smut and their questions about how various monsters would fuck them. I am so jaded that, when someone submits a tag mentioning some random vaguely liquid substance without context, I just assume it’s being used as lube. Nutella? Lube. Crazy glue? Lube. Divine fucking ichor? Fucking lube! I do this for you, y'all. I shield you from this shit. I stand athwart the tides of horror, hold my hands up, and yell “STOP” in the hopes that it will keep the waters from reaching you.
So you know what, fuckheads!? If I want to maintain the one tiny scrap of innocence I have left, I will. The official policy of AO3TagoftheDay is now that turtles, teenage, mutant, ninja, or otherwise, do not fuck. It never happens. They don’t fuck. They don’t fuck each other. They don’t fuck humans. They don’t fuck in real life and they don’t fuck in fiction. This tag is about two gay Renaissance painters holding each other close and kissing chastely under the Sistine chapel ceiling.
There. Glad we got that sorted out. Please return to your regularly scheduled programming.


Ao3tagoftheday finally snapped

I don’t know why this is so funny but I’m laughing to the point of tears

kittyknowsthings: friendlylycanthrope: ao3tagoftheday: ethermaster: ao3tagoftheday: [Image Description: Tag reading “donatello/michelan...

Cats, Chicago, and Clock: The Independent @Independent Here's what you should do in the event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/ 2piOhjW 8/9/17, 3:19 PM NBC News @NBCNews NBC NEWS "Don't run. Get inside". What experts say to do in case of a nuclear attack nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt 8/9/17, 9:30 AM CN CNN @CNN Hawaii is preparing in case of a North Korea attack. Experts say you have about 15 min. to take cover after a launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9 taraljc: lemonsharks: nikkoliferous: biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quietrain: shesheistyy: tripprophet: weavemama: ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x] This shit is wild. Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all. ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things. 1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked 1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. Good luck in the future apocalypse! Reblogged with improved readability! Look whats Relevant again… I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool. History repeats and all that jazz. After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything… We’ve been here before. It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd. Stay safe. Reminder that according to the Doomsday Clock, we are currently at greater threat of nuclear annihilation than we were even at the height of the Cold War. Nukemap for “how far from ground zero must I be to survive this” https://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/ Like… Manhattan might be toast but that doesn’t mean the citizens of Long Island shouldn’t know how to mitigate their terrible fuckin situation just because Manhattan is toast. If downtown Chicago is at the center of a nuclear bombing when I’m at work I’m dead, but if I’m home I have a chance to shelter in place and then bag up the cats and go crash with friends in Wisconsin. And also how absofuckinglutely horrifying is it that we need to know this shit? very absofuckingluteky horrifying
Cats, Chicago, and Clock: The Independent
 @Independent
 Here's what you should do in the
 event of a nuclear attack ind.pn/
 2piOhjW
 8/9/17, 3:19 PM

 NBC News
 @NBCNews
 NBC NEWS
 "Don't run. Get inside". What experts
 say to do in case of a nuclear attack
 nbcnews.to/2VNWTmt
 8/9/17, 9:30 AM

 CN
 CNN
 @CNN
 Hawaii is preparing in case of a North
 Korea attack. Experts say you have
 about 15 min. to take cover after a
 launch cnn.it/2upXdZ9
taraljc:

lemonsharks:


nikkoliferous:

biggest-goldiest-spoon:

zoanzon:

missmwynter:

madlyinlov3onda:

oakenroots:

oakenroots:


quietrain:

shesheistyy:

tripprophet:


weavemama:

ladies and gentlemen we have officially reached the “in case a nuclear attack happens” phase……. [x]

This shit is wild.


Wtf a table finna do for anybody?? There’s basically nothing you can do but die

they’re doing this to give people a sense of safety , even though we full well know this won’t work at all.

ALRIGHT KIDDOS LISTEN UP! I did emergency management for the air force which involves this fun thing called Plume Modelling (aka chart the path of death for a given bomb based on its payload, distance, type of detonation, etc) and let me tell you some actual LEGIT™ methods of minimizing damage to your life. 
Unless you are within the vaporization zone (where you turn into a fucking shadow because of your proximity to the blast) there is a specific order of events nuke blasts cause and there are ways to protect against these things.

1. There is this thing called a flash to bang ratio. It is really freaking important. The first wave from a nuke is a blinding flash of light that can literally FRY YOUR RETINAS. If you believe that a nuke has just dropped on your city, HIDE AND DONT LOOK AT IT. @shesheistyy a good solid table is good for this but you’re way less likely to go blind if you get to an internal room with no windows, especially one below ground. 
2. After the flash there will be the bang. If the time between the flash and the bang, counted in Mississippi seconds, is more than 10 seconds you MIGHT survive and just die of cancer later. If it’s between five and 10 buckle up kiddos because the worst is yet to come. And well if it’s less than 3 you won’t live long enough to remember this. These are loose estimates only. 
3. The “bang” usually announces the arrival of the fire ball. Yes. A massive heat shock will erupt from the core of the bomb and light pretty much every thing it comes into contact with, including your flesh, on fire. Back to that whole “metal buildings underground” thing. There’s really no getting around the whole getting lit on fire if you’re too close thing. 
4. Fallout. When the bomb goes off it sucks all of the shit it just vaporized up into the air with it and as the blast cools, it begins to rain down the radioactive fucked molten wreckage onto everyone in a huge radius. Just because the fallout you can see has stopped doesn’t mean the molecular radiation has stopped. 

The survival factors for nuclear blasts are time, distance and shielding. The longer it takes for it to get to you the less of it there is. The further away from the source the less dead you are. Want to survive? Put 6 feet of concrete and/or 2 feet of lead between you and everything else. Yes. Those loons with their bunkers actually got something right. 

NOW! About radiation! If you are so fortunate as to survive one of these blasts and not be vaporized or burnt to a crisp or die of radiation poisoning within hours, you need to understand the types of radiation. 

Gamma radiation is the most “severe” in that it can penetrate your flesh through your clothes and house, causing severe illness. Gamma radiation fucks with your cell walls and disrupts your DNA. It kills you in hours, months or years. Some people survive decades. Think of gamma like the sun. Too much exposure gives you cancer. 

Now Beta, on the other hand, think of Beta particles like sand on the beach. Its in the air. Its in your clothes, in the creases of your fingers. But beta particles can burn through your flesh or get into your blood stream through open wounds. Luckily they can be stopped with nonporous materials, like rubber, or foil. Make that two points for the loony conspiracy theorists. Aluminum foil does protect from beta radiation. 

And finally, Alpha radiation. Think of alpha Radiation like dust motes. It takes a high density filter to prevent you from breathing them in and if you’re surrounded by rubble they’re probably everywhere. Alpha particles do the same thing as beta particles in terms of getting into your system and wrecking your shit. 

So! Survival? Most likely based on dumb luck. But! If you think you’re being nuked
1. get under ground or at least to an internal room of the building if no other options are available. 
2. CLOSE YOUR EYES. Curl into the fetal position to protect your orifices and vital organs from gamma radiation and get low to the ground to reduce damage from the blast and potential ceiling collapse. 
3.You will still feel the flash pass over you. Count. One, two, three… If you aren’t vaporized yet keep counting. Pray to every god ever imagined that you get to 10 before you hear the bang. 
4. Bang. Try not to shit yourself. The fireball will follow almost instantly if you’re in range. Be prepared to start rolling to put yourself out. 
5. Fallout rains down. Do not open your eyes. Do not stop praying. As hard as it is because time will feel as if it has slowed to a crawl, try not to leave your position for at least 30 minutes, although 60 minutes is better. At 30 minutes, only 60% of the potential fall out has fallen but by 60 minutes, up to 90% may have come down. 
6. Remember, Alpha and beta radiation are particles. Do not put anything in your body that has not been thoroughly washed, dusted of or came from a sealed package. Point 3 for the conspiracy theorists, hot pockets and canned food are probably still safe. Do not leave shelter without goggles, and try to wrap yourself in a minimum of those weird space blankets but rubber and metal lined suits (like hazmat suits) are best for the job. 

Good luck in the future apocalypse!


Reblogged with improved readability!

Look whats Relevant again…


I wonder if there’s any where to watch White Light, Black Rain. Saw it back in highschool.

History repeats and all that jazz.
After all, It’s not like ‘duck and cover’ and other nuclear protection methods of dubious quality weren’t a mainstream in the Cold War or anything…
We’ve been here before.
It’s just the first time around for us younger crowd.


Stay safe. 

Reminder that according to the Doomsday Clock, we are currently at greater threat of nuclear annihilation than we were even at the height of the Cold War.


Nukemap for “how far from ground zero must I be to survive this”
https://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/
Like… Manhattan might be toast but that doesn’t mean the citizens of Long Island shouldn’t know how to mitigate their terrible fuckin situation just because Manhattan is toast.
If downtown Chicago is at the center of a nuclear bombing when I’m at work I’m dead, but if I’m home I have a chance to shelter in place and then bag up the cats and go crash with friends in Wisconsin.
And also how absofuckinglutely horrifying is it that we need to know this shit?


very absofuckingluteky horrifying

taraljc: lemonsharks: nikkoliferous: biggest-goldiest-spoon: zoanzon: missmwynter: madlyinlov3onda: oakenroots: oakenroots: quiet...

Books, Future, and Instagram: ishmagaar winsii1: sprinttoshelter: catchymemes: IG: @trishnagaara This shit is going to end up in history books in the future.
Books, Future, and Instagram: ishmagaar
winsii1:

sprinttoshelter:

catchymemes:

IG: @trishnagaara


This shit is going to end up in history books in the future.

winsii1: sprinttoshelter: catchymemes: IG: @trishnagaara This shit is going to end up in history books in the future.

Drunk, Fml, and Friday: Emplovee Saves Child From Kidnapper, Instead Of Promotion Gets This Letter Saying He's Fired This is Dillon Reagan. He recently stopped a child from getting kidnapped while he was at work OREGON EMPLOYMENT DEPARTMENT PO Box 14135 Satem, Oregon 97309 5068 (503) 292-2057, (541) 388-6207 or (877) 345 3484 (tol tree) Fax to (866) 345 1878 Administrative Decision OILLON T REAGAN Date Issued June 29,2017 Appeal Deadline Date: uly 19,2017 Cust ID: OUTCOME/RESULTADO. You are ALLOWED benefits on this claim, if otherwise eligible. Se le OTORGAN los beneficios en este reclamo, si de otra manera es elegible. FINDINGS You were employed by THE HOME DEPOT until June 19, 2017 when you were fired because you assisted the police in preventing a kidnapping. This was not a willful or wantonly negligent violation of the standards of behavior an employer has the right to expect of an employee LEGAL CONCLUSION/CONCLUSION JURÍDICA: You were fired but not for misconduct connected with work Usted no fue despedido por mala conducta relacionada con el trabajo. Dillon Reagan Jun 9 at 11:21pm HoPot Update: The Friday before Mother's Day, I was involved in a kidnapping attempt at my place of work. A woman had been assaulted and her child had been abducted by a drunk, violent man who was making a quick exit with the child in his arms. My co-worker and I called the police and followed their directions to follow at a distance to make sure they could find them when the squad care arrived on scene. Because of the actions of my co-worker and myself, that child was rescued from his abductor and the man was arrested on the spot. Today, Home Depot terminated my employment. I was fired for stopping a kidnapper from successfully abducting a child. FML chrisray-the-lariat-king: pon-raul: waisted-daisiess: thetrippytrip: If he manages to get that story viral, he’ll get a job 5 times better than his last one #youknowwhatImean BLOW THIS SHIT UP That’s Home Depot national policy 101 If an armed attacker comes into the store and threatens you, you will be fired for any form of retaliation, they tell you this on like day 1 More reasons Home Depot is Trash
Drunk, Fml, and Friday: Emplovee Saves Child From Kidnapper,
 Instead Of Promotion Gets This Letter
 Saying He's Fired

 This is Dillon Reagan. He recently
 stopped a child from getting
 kidnapped while he was at work

 OREGON EMPLOYMENT DEPARTMENT
 PO Box 14135 Satem, Oregon 97309 5068
 (503) 292-2057, (541) 388-6207 or (877) 345 3484 (tol tree)
 Fax to (866) 345 1878
 Administrative Decision
 OILLON T REAGAN
 Date Issued
 June 29,2017
 Appeal Deadline Date:
 uly 19,2017
 Cust ID:
 OUTCOME/RESULTADO.
 You are ALLOWED benefits on this claim, if otherwise eligible.
 Se le OTORGAN los beneficios en este reclamo, si de otra manera es elegible.
 FINDINGS
 You were employed by THE HOME DEPOT until June 19, 2017 when you were fired because you assisted
 the police in preventing a kidnapping. This was not a willful or wantonly negligent violation of the
 standards of behavior an employer has the right to expect of an employee
 LEGAL CONCLUSION/CONCLUSION JURÍDICA:
 You were fired but not for misconduct connected with work
 Usted no fue despedido por mala conducta relacionada con el trabajo.

 Dillon Reagan
 Jun 9 at 11:21pm
 HoPot Update:
 The Friday before Mother's Day, I was involved in a
 kidnapping attempt at my place of work.
 A woman had been assaulted and her child had been
 abducted by a drunk, violent man who was making a
 quick exit with the child in his arms.
 My co-worker and I called the police and followed their
 directions to follow at a distance to make sure they
 could find them when the squad care arrived on scene.
 Because of the actions of my co-worker and myself,
 that child was rescued from his abductor and the man
 was arrested on the spot.
 Today, Home Depot terminated my employment.
 I was fired for stopping a kidnapper from successfully
 abducting a child.
 FML
chrisray-the-lariat-king:

pon-raul:
waisted-daisiess:

thetrippytrip:


If he manages to get that story viral, he’ll get a job 5 times better than his last one #youknowwhatImean

BLOW THIS SHIT UP 


That’s Home Depot national policy 101
If an armed attacker comes into the store and threatens you, you will be fired for any form of retaliation, they tell you this on like day 1 

More reasons Home Depot is Trash

chrisray-the-lariat-king: pon-raul: waisted-daisiess: thetrippytrip: If he manages to get that story viral, he’ll get a job 5 times bett...

Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH. NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED of only they taught beauty class like this Best description of sugar scrub ever.
Ass, Bitch, and Fucking: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders
 ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN
 SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR
 NOTEPAD
 THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW
 YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I
 KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE
 FUCKERS
 YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT
 YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN
 THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM
 TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A
 NEWBORN
 sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND
 SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND
 MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART
 OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL
 BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO
 SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL
 THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR
 MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU
 WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM
 SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
 NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED
 PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE
 BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND
 SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS
 VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE
 NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND
 SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A
 HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER
 THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near
 your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really
 important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way
 its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR
 HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS
 WORKING
 NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU
 HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN
 EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN
 BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF
 BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
 GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT
 WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF
 YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS
 CLASS DISMISSED
 of only they taught beauty class like this
Best description of sugar scrub ever.

Best description of sugar scrub ever.

Ass, Birthday, and Comfortable: Excuse generator Use your birthday to generate an excuse January February March April May June 16 I don't give a shit 17 I was drunk I'm sorry I'm soooo sorry Honestly... You know what? 1 I didn't feel like it 2 forgot 3 I rewatched GBBO 18 It was far too boring 19 I just found out l'm a ghost instead 4 I watched porn instead 20 My dong was too itchy 5 I do what I want Hey, fuck you buddy Don't look at me like that It won't happen again, but 21 I spent the night learning to 6 *points at crotch* 7 I have diarrhoea riverdance 22 It's none of your concern! ul 8 My fucking dog ate it 23 Your expectations are too high 9 Homework is for dicks 24 You're not the boss of me 10 It's none of your August Look me in the eye September You know why, Bob?! October For the last time November think you know December You wanna know why 25 I am filled with existential angst 26 I'm too cool for this shit. business. 11 I've been thinking a lot 27 My STls are acting up 28 My bed is too comfortable 29 Why don't you ask your mum about Brexit I didn't do your stupid 12 Yolo. Yolo 13 I'm not a dork 14 Shut up, that's why. 15 l have a life why I didn't do it? SM.S 30 It would have been shit anyway. 31 I didn't feel like doing something STUDENT MONEY SAVER dumb today imstuckathome12: xxxxarachnidsgripxxxx: green-cryptid: mystical-blue-jellyfish: wanderinglilweirdo: tiggyloo: cutie-quinn: sky-uppercunt: ryannandreww: edgarahoe: apathbetweenthestars: dontkillbirds: brutusfeels: doodle-dumpingground: madd-of-the-dead: the-regeneratin-degenerate: foxrat: “it wont happen again, but your expectations are too high” what kind of morbid ass shit is that “I think you know I was drunk” daaamn that’s so accurate to me “It wont happen again bit it would have been shit anyways” this is a bullshit excuse that I would def use “Look me in the eyes… I am filled with existential angst”Now I don’t use excuses often, but this is one of the greatest things I have ever heard XD Hey fuck you buddy I’m filled with existential angst is a goodun Hey don’t look at me like that, I just found out I’m a ghost! Don’t look at me like that.  My bed is too comfortable. “You know what? I have diarrhea.” “Honestly…it’s none of your business “ For the last time i watched GBBO instead Oh gosh, august 4th I think I win with “for the last time, I don’t give a shit” “You know why, Bob? Shut up, that’s why!” …..i love it “I’m soooo sorry. I was drunk.” The first part seems fitting though. But I never was drunk, never drank alcohol. And I will never drink it. hey fuck you buddy it would have been shit anyways im sooo sorry. Shut up that’s why. Im sooo sorry im filled with existential angst “You know what? I have a life.” So savage, damn-
Ass, Birthday, and Comfortable: Excuse generator
 Use your birthday to generate an excuse
 January
 February
 March
 April
 May
 June
 16 I don't give a shit
 17 I was drunk
 I'm sorry
 I'm soooo sorry
 Honestly...
 You know what?
 1 I didn't feel like it
 2 forgot
 3 I rewatched GBBO
 18 It was far too boring
 19 I just found out l'm a ghost
 instead
 4 I watched porn instead 20 My dong was too itchy
 5 I do what I want
 Hey, fuck you buddy
 Don't look at me like
 that
 It won't happen again,
 but
 21 I spent the night learning to
 6 *points at crotch*
 7 I have diarrhoea
 riverdance
 22 It's none of your concern!
 ul
 8 My fucking dog ate it 23 Your expectations are too high
 9 Homework is for dicks 24 You're not the boss of me
 10 It's none of your
 August Look me in the eye
 September You know why, Bob?!
 October For the last time
 November think you know
 December You wanna know why
 25 I am filled with existential angst
 26 I'm too cool for this shit.
 business.
 11 I've been thinking a lot 27 My STls are acting up
 28 My bed is too comfortable
 29 Why don't you ask your mum
 about Brexit
 I didn't do your stupid
 12 Yolo. Yolo
 13 I'm not a dork
 14 Shut up, that's why.
 15 l have a life
 why I didn't do it?
 SM.S
 30 It would have been shit anyway.
 31 I didn't feel like doing something
 STUDENT MONEY SAVER
 dumb today
imstuckathome12:

xxxxarachnidsgripxxxx:

green-cryptid:

mystical-blue-jellyfish:
wanderinglilweirdo:


tiggyloo:

cutie-quinn:

sky-uppercunt:


ryannandreww:


edgarahoe:


apathbetweenthestars:


dontkillbirds:

brutusfeels:


doodle-dumpingground:


madd-of-the-dead:

the-regeneratin-degenerate:

foxrat:
“it wont happen again, but your expectations are too high” what kind of morbid ass shit is that

“I think you know I was drunk” daaamn that’s so accurate to me


“It wont happen again bit it would have been shit anyways” this is a bullshit excuse that I would def use

“Look me in the eyes… I am filled with existential angst”Now I don’t use excuses often, but this is one of the greatest things I have ever heard XD


Hey fuck you buddy I’m filled with existential angst is a goodun


Hey don’t look at me like that, I just found out I’m a ghost!

Don’t look at me like that.  My bed is too comfortable.


“You know what? I have diarrhea.”


“Honestly…it’s none of your business “


For the last time i watched GBBO instead


Oh gosh, august 4th


I think I win with “for the last time, I don’t give a shit”

“You know why, Bob? Shut up, that’s why!”
…..i love it


“I’m soooo sorry. I was drunk.” 
The first part seems fitting though. But I never was drunk, never drank alcohol. And I will never drink it. 

hey fuck you buddy it would have been shit anyways

im sooo sorry. Shut up that’s why.

Im sooo sorry im filled with existential angst

“You know what? I have a life.” So savage, damn-

imstuckathome12: xxxxarachnidsgripxxxx: green-cryptid: mystical-blue-jellyfish: wanderinglilweirdo: tiggyloo: cutie-quinn: sky-upperc...

Doctor, Facebook, and Omg: Red @redgermz Saw this on Facebook and sent it to my brother, who is a pharmacist. Unsa man na b 10:29 AM Paracetamol OMG celticpyro: mami-kouga0: r4cs0: pseudonymsobriquet: klubbhead: halcyonjester: xmagnet-o: cfluffiness: Someone in facebook also posted this too Omg Mediglyphics This shit’s infuriating Oh, this is a type of shorthand! There are 3 main types, but from my research, this looks to be American Gregg Shorthand. As you can see, there are set symbols for every letter. Let’s break one of the words down: Using the Gregg Alphabet as reference, we can see most of the letters in “atrophied” are present. But why no “o” vowel, and why is “ph” written as “f”? Simple. In shorthand, you cut out all vowels in a word when writing it down, with the exception of words that BEGIN or END with a vowel (hence the “a” at the start being present), or like in the “i” in “atrophied”, to make it more readable when the sound could be harder to distinguish if it isn’t written. In “atrophied” if the the “i” isn’t written, it could be hard to tell if the writer meant a “fud”, “fad”, “fod” or “fid” sound, for example. Also, since Shorthand is a phonetic writing system, you are encouraged to write down the phonetic sounds of words rather than the actual letter blends - in this case, write an “f” instead of a “ph”. So in actuality, these aren’t just meaningless scribbles - it’s Gregg Shorthand, a writing system developed to take down notes more quickly than when written out in full, which is very useful in a medical or journalistic environment. Some people can even write over 100 words in a minute! And, it’s been in use since John Robert Gregg invented it in 1888! Wow! So old! Isn’t language amazing~? I S2G if I actually have to learn this shit later… I can’t believe doctors have their own secret Doctor Glyphs like some secret circle of witchcraft. o_o
Doctor, Facebook, and Omg: Red
 @redgermz
 Saw this on Facebook and sent it to
 my brother, who is a pharmacist.
 Unsa man na b
 10:29 AM
 Paracetamol
 OMG
celticpyro:

mami-kouga0:

r4cs0:

pseudonymsobriquet:

klubbhead:

halcyonjester:


xmagnet-o:

cfluffiness:


Someone in facebook also posted this too


Omg

Mediglyphics


This shit’s infuriating

Oh, this is a type of shorthand! 
There are 3 main types, but from my research, this looks to be American Gregg Shorthand.


As you can see, there are set symbols for every letter. 
Let’s break one of the words down:
Using the Gregg Alphabet as reference, we can see most of the letters in “atrophied” are present. But why no “o” vowel, and why is “ph” written as “f”? 
Simple. In shorthand, you cut out all vowels in a word when writing it down, with the exception of words that BEGIN or END with a vowel (hence the “a” at the start being present), or like in the “i” in “atrophied”, to make it more readable when the sound could be harder to distinguish if it isn’t written. In “atrophied” if the the “i” isn’t written, it could be hard to tell if the writer meant a “fud”, “fad”, “fod” or “fid” sound, for example.
Also, since Shorthand is a phonetic writing system, you are encouraged to write down the phonetic sounds of words rather than the actual letter blends - in this case, write an “f” instead of a “ph”. 
So in actuality, these aren’t just meaningless scribbles - it’s Gregg Shorthand, a writing system developed to take down notes more quickly than when written out in full, which is very useful in a medical or journalistic environment. 
Some people can even write over 100 words in a minute! And, it’s been in use since John Robert Gregg invented it in 1888! Wow! So old!
Isn’t language amazing~? 



I S2G if I actually have to learn this shit later…

I can’t believe doctors have their own secret Doctor Glyphs like some secret circle of witchcraft. o_o

celticpyro: mami-kouga0: r4cs0: pseudonymsobriquet: klubbhead: halcyonjester: xmagnet-o: cfluffiness: Someone in facebook also pos...