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Snow, Thought, and Cat: First snow of the year and my cat really wanted to go outside… or so she thought.
Snow, Thought, and Cat: First snow of the year and my cat really wanted to go outside… or so she thought.

First snow of the year and my cat really wanted to go outside… or so she thought.

Snow, Thought, and Cat: First snow of the year and my cat really wanted to go outside… or so she thought.
Snow, Thought, and Cat: First snow of the year and my cat really wanted to go outside… or so she thought.

First snow of the year and my cat really wanted to go outside… or so she thought.

Books, Driving, and Friends: Yestay Tke top banaas like you Whet's the date thent hun Im driving past Gatwick tonight, get ready x t Tinish in Smins perfect can't watt Let me know when and where to pick you up/meet 7 Today Gatwick airport south terminal 410 pm Be there or be suuare Please dont I'm the kind of person that would actually book a flight somewhere with a random person on tinder Lets doit Where we going Paris taly New York? Vour choice m game But Thave options so be quick Daling https://www.wowcher.co.uk deal/travel/12846246/mystery getaway-voucher?from 4699308 Sroot.metadata.title Sroot metadata.description www.wohet.cok Tm game No joke shall we actually do it Pls don't be shitting me d actually be up for it Yeah me too Do we get to dchoose when were going mno snake How do we booki Ate they legith I think you get to choose out of a couple of weekends, but Im not 100% Also if you get Ball or one of the really far away ones you go for a week Yeah they're legit One of my friends has done it and I've been so up for it ever since I heard about it One of us books then the other transfers the money? Can w.choose a date prety E0on Need a bit of sun in my life Haha yeah sure, cba with this rain You happy for me to book and then you transfer me? Yeu Im good with that) just can't do this weekend The holiday thati Pzoan we fly from Gatwick it we can choose The draw is on the 23rd, so we find out where we go then and book the flights and give all our details in then Will try and go from Gatwick for sure Fingers crossed it bai Fuck if we're going on holiday l have to go for a nin Get this sexy beach bod ready That would be ridiculous 0 Ok it's booked And shutup you already have a beach bod! Delived My mate matched with her 2 days ago and is now waiting for a reply after the most daring thing he’s ever done..
Books, Driving, and Friends: Yestay
 Tke top banaas
 like you
 Whet's the date thent hun
 Im driving past Gatwick tonight,
 get ready x
 t
 Tinish in Smins perfect
 can't watt
 Let me know when and where to
 pick you up/meet
 7
 Today
 Gatwick airport south terminal
 410 pm
 Be there or be suuare
 Please dont
 I'm the kind of person that would
 actually book a flight somewhere
 with a random person on tinder
 Lets doit
 Where we going
 Paris
 taly
 New York?
 Vour choice
 m game
 But
 Thave options so be quick
 Daling
 https://www.wowcher.co.uk
 deal/travel/12846246/mystery
 getaway-voucher?from
 4699308
 Sroot.metadata.title
 Sroot metadata.description
 www.wohet.cok
 Tm game
 No joke shall we actually do it
 Pls don't be shitting me
 d actually be up for it
 Yeah me too
 Do we get to dchoose when were
 going
 mno snake
 How do we booki
 Ate they legith
 I think you get to choose out of a
 couple of weekends, but Im not
 100%
 Also if you get Ball or one of the
 really far away ones you go for a
 week
 Yeah they're legit
 One of my friends has done it
 and I've been so up for it ever
 since I heard about it
 One of us books then the other
 transfers the money?
 Can w.choose a date prety
 E0on
 Need a bit of sun in my life
 Haha yeah sure, cba with this rain
 You happy for me to book and
 then you transfer me?
 Yeu Im good with that) just can't
 do this weekend
 The holiday thati
 Pzoan we fly from Gatwick it we
 can choose
 The draw is on the 23rd, so we
 find out where we go then and
 book the flights and give all our
 details in then
 Will try and go from Gatwick for
 sure
 Fingers crossed it bai
 Fuck if we're going on holiday l
 have to go for a nin
 Get this sexy beach bod ready
 That would be ridiculous
 0
 Ok it's booked
 And shutup you already have a
 beach bod!
 Delived
My mate matched with her 2 days ago and is now waiting for a reply after the most daring thing he’s ever done..

My mate matched with her 2 days ago and is now waiting for a reply after the most daring thing he’s ever done..

Target, Tumblr, and Blog: corsolanite:man this movie didn’t have to go there like that but they did anyway.
Target, Tumblr, and Blog: corsolanite:man this movie didn’t have to go there like that but they did anyway.

corsolanite:man this movie didn’t have to go there like that but they did anyway.

Facebook, Fast Food, and Food: Too Horny But Horny For Cuddling @SeitanSlut Ah yes. Explore a restaurant while waiters carry around hot food and beverages. A safe environment for a child to go unaccompanied. Slate @Slate 7h SLATE Our waitress told him to sit down. I'm angry she didn't speak to me before disciplining my kid. slate.trib.al/koyzfB5 lazy-cat-corner: giasesshoumaru: This is the full question and response in case anyone is curious. It’s awesome. Dear Care and Feeding, My wife and I and our 4-year-old son were out to dinner last week. It was a medium-nice restaurant, not fast food, but not super fancy either. My son is a normal, active little boy, and it’s hard for him to sit through a whole dinner, so we let him explore the restaurant a little. I noticed our waitress giving him the hairy eyeball, so we asked him to stop running. He was pretty good about it after that, but he did get underfoot when she was carrying a tray, and she spoke to him pretty sharply to go back to our table and sit down. I felt it was completely uncalled for, and she should have come and spoken to us personally instead of disciplining someone else’s child. I tipped 5 percent and spoke briefly to her manager, who gave noncommittal replies. My wife agrees with me, but when we posted about it on Facebook, we got a lot of judgy responses. —It’s Hard for a 4-Year-Old to Sit Still Dear Sit Still, Yeah, this is your fault. It’s hugely your fault. Of course it’s hard for a 4-year-old to sit still, which is why people usually stick to fast-dining establishments while working on restaurant manners. It’s why one parent usually responds to a fidgety kid who wants to “explore” by taking him outside the restaurant, where he can get his wiggles out while not taking laps around servers precariously carrying trays of (often extremely hot) food and drink. A kid “exploring” a restaurant is not a thing. When you did intervene, it wasn’t to get him back in his seat. It was just to instruct him to “stop running.” You weren’t parenting, so a server did it for you. She was right. You were wrong. Your son is not ready to eat at a “medium-nice” restaurant again until he is capable of behaving a little better. You can practice at home. You can practice at McDonald’s. You can try a real restaurant again with the understanding that one of you may need to take him out when he starts getting the urge to run an obstacle course. I doubt that you will do this, but I encourage you to return the restaurant, apologize to the manager for complaining about your server, and leave her a proper tip. Mend your wicked ways. And that’s the tea! It’s not complicated. Your wine glass is on your right Use the fork farthest from you and work your way in Watch your damn kids And tip your fucking waiters! Periodt!!!
Facebook, Fast Food, and Food: Too Horny But Horny For Cuddling
 @SeitanSlut
 Ah yes. Explore a restaurant while waiters carry around
 hot food and beverages. A safe environment for a child
 to go unaccompanied.
 Slate
 @Slate 7h
 SLATE
 Our waitress told him to sit down. I'm angry she didn't speak to me before
 disciplining my kid. slate.trib.al/koyzfB5
lazy-cat-corner:
giasesshoumaru:


This is the full question and response in case anyone is curious. It’s awesome.
Dear Care and Feeding,
My wife and I and our 4-year-old son were out to dinner last week. It was a medium-nice restaurant, not fast food, but not super fancy either. My son is a normal, active little boy, and it’s hard for him to sit through a whole dinner, so we let him explore the restaurant a little. I noticed our waitress giving him the hairy eyeball, so we asked him to stop running. He was pretty good about it after that, but he did get underfoot when she was carrying a tray, and she spoke to him pretty sharply to go back to our table and sit down. I felt it was completely uncalled for, and she should have come and spoken to us personally instead of disciplining someone else’s child.
I tipped 5 percent and spoke briefly to her manager, who gave noncommittal replies. My wife agrees with me, but when we posted about it on Facebook, we got a lot of judgy responses.
—It’s Hard for a 4-Year-Old to Sit Still
Dear Sit Still,
Yeah, this is your fault. It’s hugely your fault. Of course it’s hard for a 4-year-old to sit still, which is why people usually stick to fast-dining establishments while working on restaurant manners. It’s why one parent usually responds to a fidgety kid who wants to “explore” by taking him outside the restaurant, where he can get his wiggles out while not taking laps around servers precariously carrying trays of (often extremely hot) food and drink.
A kid “exploring” a restaurant is not a thing. When you did intervene, it wasn’t to get him back in his seat. It was just to instruct him to “stop running.” You weren’t parenting, so a server did it for you. She was right. You were wrong.
Your son is not ready to eat at a “medium-nice” restaurant again until he is capable of behaving a little better. You can practice at home. You can practice at McDonald’s. You can try a real restaurant again with the understanding that one of you may need to take him out when he starts getting the urge to run an obstacle course.
I doubt that you will do this, but I encourage you to return the restaurant, apologize to the manager for complaining about your server, and leave her a proper tip.
Mend your wicked ways.


And that’s the tea! 
It’s not complicated.
Your wine glass is on your right 
Use the fork farthest from you and work your way in
Watch your damn kids
And tip your fucking waiters! Periodt!!!

lazy-cat-corner: giasesshoumaru: This is the full question and response in case anyone is curious. It’s awesome. Dear Care and Feeding, My...

Ass, Bitch, and Bruh: The Economist -Follow Economist TheEconomist Why aren't millennials buying diamonds? econ.st/294G6yf leoismybookcrush: highklaushargreeves: my-analogical-romance: magicallygrimmwiccan: jackdrawsgames: luidilovins: phruxx: stynalane: dxisybuchanan: everythingcanadian: ariaste: wildhaunt: everkings: kid-communism: combatbooty: 1) they expensive bruh 2) none of us kno the dif btwn a fucking diamond and some fancy ass glass ur capitalist rock hierarchy has no control over us 3) mostly mined with slave labor 4) we get excited when our date buys us an appetizer, we don’t even comprehend people buying us rocks that would force us into debt for ten years 5) They aren’t actually that rare and the price is artificially inflated.  Pro tip from a former Jared’s salesperson: You want a sparkly white rock that will look like a diamond to the untrained eye and will literally cost the price of a nice dinner for two? Created white sapphire. They’re lab grown and cost *pennies* to make, so you can get a 1 or 2 carat white sapphire for like… $30-80 probably. You can get one as huge as you like, perfectly clear, perfectly flawless. And no one will ever be able to tell the difference except a professional appraiser. Also, sapphires are the second-hardest gemstone (right after diamonds) so they are very durable! Very unlikely that they’ll chip or crack. Get that bitch set in sterling silver and you are GOOD TO GO. Whole thing should cost you less than $200 unless you get a fancy band with a lot of extra stones. Of course, created sapphires come in every color of the rainbow, so if you want something more exciting than plain white, you TOTALLY CAN.  Created sapphires and silver: The poor Millennial’s engagement ring.  THANK YOU EX-JARED’S BASED GOD.  engagement rings: HACKED Get a ring from an antique store. They’re usually less than $100, you know they hold up over time, no one else will have one like it, and it comes with the bonus of being haunted by the spirit of some old woman named Edith probably. thanks edith Tiger’s eye: $47 bucks on etsy. Propose to your elderich horror with a ring she deserves. Rose quarts rose ring? 43 bucks. Symbol of love. Looks like a ring pop. Win-win. Druzy quartz 40 bucks. Cant pick a color? Go with all of them. Neat texture. Snowflake obsidian? 20 bucks. Made from the fires of the Earth’s molten core. Pretty dope conversation starter. Jade 15-30 bucks. Literally has a history of inner peace and spiritual awakening. Good gentle reminder not to kill your spouse. SO PRETTY @theotheralya Could give me a rock u found on the floor and thought I’d like and I would genuinely be ecstatic The ring I got Cas. Oak and a teeny tiny fern leaf. My dad proposed to my mom with a Ring Pop on April Fool’s Day
Ass, Bitch, and Bruh: The Economist
 -Follow
 Economist
 TheEconomist
 Why aren't millennials buying diamonds?
 econ.st/294G6yf
leoismybookcrush:
highklaushargreeves:

my-analogical-romance:


magicallygrimmwiccan:

jackdrawsgames:

luidilovins:

phruxx:

stynalane:

dxisybuchanan:

everythingcanadian:

ariaste:

wildhaunt:

everkings:

kid-communism:

combatbooty:

1) they expensive bruh 2) none of us kno the dif btwn a fucking diamond and some fancy ass glass ur capitalist rock hierarchy has no control over us

3) mostly mined with slave labor

4) we get excited when our date buys us an appetizer, we don’t even comprehend people buying us rocks that would force us into debt for ten years

5) They aren’t actually that rare and the price is artificially inflated. 

Pro tip from a former Jared’s salesperson: You want a sparkly white rock that will look like a diamond to the untrained eye and will literally cost the price of a nice dinner for two? Created white sapphire. They’re lab grown and cost *pennies* to make, so you can get a 1 or 2 carat white sapphire for like… $30-80 probably. You can get one as huge as you like, perfectly clear, perfectly flawless. And no one will ever be able to tell the difference except a professional appraiser. Also, sapphires are the second-hardest gemstone (right after diamonds) so they are very durable! Very unlikely that they’ll chip or crack. Get that bitch set in sterling silver and you are GOOD TO GO. Whole thing should cost you less than $200 unless you get a fancy band with a lot of extra stones. Of course, created sapphires come in every color of the rainbow, so if you want something more exciting than plain white, you TOTALLY CAN. 
Created sapphires and silver: The poor Millennial’s engagement ring. 

THANK YOU EX-JARED’S BASED GOD. 

engagement rings: HACKED


Get a ring from an antique store. They’re usually less than $100, you know they hold up over time, no one else will have one like it, and it comes with the bonus of being haunted by the spirit of some old woman named Edith probably. 

thanks edith


Tiger’s eye: $47 bucks on etsy. Propose to your elderich horror with a ring she deserves. 
Rose quarts rose ring? 43 bucks. Symbol of love. Looks like a ring pop. Win-win. 
Druzy quartz 40 bucks. Cant pick a color? Go with all of them. Neat texture. 
Snowflake obsidian? 20 bucks. Made from the fires of the Earth’s molten core. Pretty dope conversation starter. 
Jade 15-30 bucks. Literally has a history of inner peace and spiritual awakening. Good gentle reminder not to kill your spouse. 

SO PRETTY

@theotheralya


Could give me a rock u found on the floor and thought I’d like and I would genuinely be ecstatic 


The ring I got Cas. Oak and a teeny tiny fern leaf. 

My dad proposed to my mom with a Ring Pop on April Fool’s Day

leoismybookcrush: highklaushargreeves: my-analogical-romance: magicallygrimmwiccan: jackdrawsgames: luidilovins: phruxx: stynalane: ...

Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s A dating service where matching is based people's search history exists. You're a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer. endreams-s Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it? Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a heart attack. Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks in a breath* ok fangoddess817 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks December C) Baby infinityonthot A++ addition tetsuskitten Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene they're writing* babe, i'm not sure if this would actually work? Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great tigerliliesandcherryblossoms I LOVE THIS vmohlere Oh no, murder comedy is my jam laziestofthedreamers I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gullible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it's completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work. Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there's something to the theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author's home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries. So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he'll FINALLY have proof. annieutimagines Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal. "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer." Serial killer breaths in. "Look-" I love this so much
Apparently, Crime, and Dating: writing-prompt-s
 A dating service where matching is based
 people's search history exists. You're a serial killer.
 You go on a date with a writer.
 endreams-s
 Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill
 someone, how would you do it?
 Writer: Air shot between the toes, it'll look like a
 heart attack.
 Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks
 in a breath* ok
 fangoddess817
 Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to
 potentially stab someone in the guts
 Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes
 Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks
 December C) Baby
 infinityonthot
 A++ addition
 tetsuskitten
 Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene
 they're writing* babe, i'm not sure if this would
 actually work?
 Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and
 leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood
 coming off them* it works baby, you're doing great
 tigerliliesandcherryblossoms
 I LOVE THIS
 vmohlere
 Oh no, murder comedy is my jam
 laziestofthedreamers
 I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does
 the author know? Like are they aware that their
 significant other is a serial killer or do they just think
 that they have a morbid sense of humor? It'd be
 even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like
 how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly
 gullible, and on top of it they're a horror or crime
 novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop
 or something so it's completely normal for them to
 come home smelling like blood, no murders going on
 here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home
 from a long day at work.
 Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed
 to get their first book published, with loving support
 from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all
 the murder scenes, and it's a big hit. Enough so that
 detective with the local police department has
 noticed some disturbing similarities to several active
 cases, including details that were never released to
 the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior
 and convinces him that there's something to the
 theory, but it's all circumstantial right now. He stakes
 out the author's home and is super convinced that
 the author is the murderer, but they don't seem to do
 anything??? Like they literally are at the house all
 day, that's it. Most they do is leave for groceries.
 So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the
 author for creative murder schemes, the author
 being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and
 finally the detective who is just so sure that the
 author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long
 enough he'll FINALLY have proof.
 annieutimagines
 Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go
 out so it gets sub what personal.
 "You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a
 serial killer."
 Serial killer breaths in. "Look-"
I love this so much

I love this so much