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Android, Bad, and Chill: When you tell your boyfriend a joke and the girl under his bed starts laughing too Never forget your girls favorite color. I can’t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find another dollar, are you not going to pick it up? Long story short my girl was out of town at her friends graduation. She left me a spear key to come feed her dog through out the week. I did the opposite, I treated him like Gary the snail. I had my side girl over bout to get busy. You know that deep gut feeling that tells you “ight chill out” but you ignore it? That be God mercy tryna save you. I’m catching some bomb neck, I’m talking about My meat going through a 5 star car wash when I hear a engine pull up out front. I look out the window and see my girl hop out a Uber. My side girl hid under the bed. I can tell She done this before. I slid under the sheets and fake sleep. My girl comes in talking about she changed her flight to come home sooner. Android users text take 3 business days. Babe starts asking me what’s her favorite color. I confidently blurted our magenta. Here comes her dog with a red thong in his mouth. Damn dogs can’t stick together? The FBI agent in her came out and starts interrogating me. Under her sheets I’m getting my dick rode by bed bugs during the interrogation process. Im tryna figure how to get this girl out this crib before I’m toast. My girl mid way through her sentence when you hear a sneeze under her bed. Within seconds my girl downloaded a heart beat sensor. I swear Android users got it good. This is now modern warfare. I watch my girl play search&destroy with my side chick. Side chicks heartless so she couldn’t detect her. Me being the real nigga I am had to flip the whole situation on her. “I don’t like how you assume me as a black man cheat, if you don’t trust me Idk about this” Tears in my eyes because it smelled like fish cakes and my eyes couldn’t take it. My girl felt bad and hit me with the double hand twist Gawk combo. My girl said she was coming back Sunday and came back Friday. She lied to me. I can’t date liars fam. I broke up with her. I’m single and my side girl still live under my ex bed. She text me from time to time for help. Shoulda had a escape rope.
Android, Bad, and Chill: When you tell your boyfriend a joke
 and the girl under his bed starts
 laughing too
Never forget your girls favorite color. I can’t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find another dollar, are you not going to pick it up? Long story short my girl was out of town at her friends graduation. She left me a spear key to come feed her dog through out the week. I did the opposite, I treated him like Gary the snail. I had my side girl over bout to get busy. You know that deep gut feeling that tells you “ight chill out” but you ignore it? That be God mercy tryna save you. I’m catching some bomb neck, I’m talking about My meat going through a 5 star car wash when I hear a engine pull up out front. I look out the window and see my girl hop out a Uber. My side girl hid under the bed. I can tell She done this before. I slid under the sheets and fake sleep. My girl comes in talking about she changed her flight to come home sooner. Android users text take 3 business days. Babe starts asking me what’s her favorite color. I confidently blurted our magenta. Here comes her dog with a red thong in his mouth. Damn dogs can’t stick together? The FBI agent in her came out and starts interrogating me. Under her sheets I’m getting my dick rode by bed bugs during the interrogation process. Im tryna figure how to get this girl out this crib before I’m toast. My girl mid way through her sentence when you hear a sneeze under her bed. Within seconds my girl downloaded a heart beat sensor. I swear Android users got it good. This is now modern warfare. I watch my girl play search&destroy with my side chick. Side chicks heartless so she couldn’t detect her. Me being the real nigga I am had to flip the whole situation on her. “I don’t like how you assume me as a black man cheat, if you don’t trust me Idk about this” Tears in my eyes because it smelled like fish cakes and my eyes couldn’t take it. My girl felt bad and hit me with the double hand twist Gawk combo. My girl said she was coming back Sunday and came back Friday. She lied to me. I can’t date liars fam. I broke up with her. I’m single and my side girl still live under my ex bed. She text me from time to time for help. Shoulda had a escape rope.

Never forget your girls favorite color. I can’t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find anothe...

Anaconda, Ass, and Bailey Jay: 00 19:15 thewitchdoctor The Economist # L-Follow The TheEconomist Why aren't millennials buying diamonds? econ.st/294G6yf combatbooty 1) they expensive bruh 2) none of us kno the dif btwn a fucking diamond and some fancy ass glass ur capitalist rock hierarchy has no control over us kid-communism 3) mostly mined with slave labor 4 00 . 19:15 mostly mined with slave labor everkings 4) we get excited when our date buys us an appetizer, we don't even comprehend people buying us rocks that would force us into debt for ten years 전 wildhaunt 5) They aren't actually that rare and the price is artificially inflated ariaste Pro tip from a former Jared's salesperson: You want a sparkly white rock that will look like a diamond to the untrained eye and will literally cost the price of a nice dinner for two? Created white sapphire. They're lab grown and cost *pennies* to make, so you can get a 1 or 2 carat white sapphire for like... $30-80 probably You can get one as huge as you like, perfectly clear, perfectly flawless. And no one will ever be able to tel the difference except a professional appraiser. Also, sapphires are the second-hardest gemstone (right after diamonds) so they are very durable! Very unlikely that they'll chip or crack. Get that bitch set in sterling silver and you are GOOD TO GO. Whole thing should cost you less than $200 unless you get a fancy band with a lot 4 00 . 19:15 unless you get a fancy band with a lot ess than of extra stones. Of course, created sapphires come in every color of the rainbow, so if you want something more exciting than plain white, you TOTALLY CAN Created sapphires and silver: The poor Millennial's engagement ring everythingcanadian THANK YOU EX-JARED'S BASED GOD dxisybuchanan engagement rings: HACKED stynalane Get a ring from an antique store. They're usually less than $100, you know they hold up over time, no one else will have one like it, and it comes with the bonus of being haunted by the spirit of some old woman named Edith probably phruxx thanks edith Fuente: thewitchdoctor 581,276 notas 4 Now I'll have more money for my avocado toast.
Anaconda, Ass, and Bailey Jay: 00
 19:15
 thewitchdoctor
 The Economist
 #
 L-Follow
 The
 TheEconomist
 Why aren't millennials buying diamonds?
 econ.st/294G6yf
 combatbooty
 1) they expensive bruh 2) none of us kno the dif btwn a
 fucking diamond and some fancy ass glass ur capitalist
 rock hierarchy has no control over us
 kid-communism
 3) mostly mined with slave labor
 4

 00
 . 19:15
 mostly mined with slave labor
 everkings
 4) we get excited when our date buys us an appetizer,
 we don't even comprehend people buying us rocks that
 would force us into debt for ten years
 전 wildhaunt
 5) They aren't actually that rare and the price is
 artificially inflated
 ariaste
 Pro tip from a former Jared's salesperson: You want a
 sparkly white rock that will look like a diamond to the
 untrained eye and will literally cost the price of a nice
 dinner for two? Created white sapphire. They're lab
 grown and cost *pennies* to make, so you can get a
 1 or 2 carat white sapphire for like... $30-80 probably
 You can get one as huge as you like, perfectly clear,
 perfectly flawless. And no one will ever be able to tel
 the difference except a professional appraiser. Also,
 sapphires are the second-hardest gemstone (right after
 diamonds) so they are very durable! Very unlikely that
 they'll chip or crack. Get that bitch set in sterling silver
 and you are GOOD TO GO. Whole thing should cost you
 less than $200 unless you get a fancy band with a lot
 4

 00
 . 19:15
 unless you get a fancy band with a lot
 ess than
 of extra stones. Of course, created sapphires come in
 every color of the rainbow, so if you want something
 more exciting than plain white, you TOTALLY CAN
 Created sapphires and silver: The poor Millennial's
 engagement ring
 everythingcanadian
 THANK YOU EX-JARED'S BASED GOD
 dxisybuchanan
 engagement rings: HACKED
 stynalane
 Get a ring from an antique store. They're usually less
 than $100, you know they hold up over time, no one
 else will have one like it, and it comes with the bonus of
 being haunted by the spirit of some old woman named
 Edith probably
 phruxx
 thanks edith
 Fuente: thewitchdoctor
 581,276 notas
 4
Now I'll have more money for my avocado toast.

Now I'll have more money for my avocado toast.